Dr House was as dead as a doornail. This must be distinctly understood or nothing wonderful can come of this story I am going to relate.
CSIMel Presents
'A Christmas Carol'
Based on the novel by
Charles Dickens
Featuring characters from the medical drama
House M.D
Dr Gregory House sat at his desk, feet on the table playing his game boy. It was Christmas Eve and for once, they didn't have anything to do. So House decided to spend the time amusing himself, while his young doctors did their paperwork. After bombing out on the 23rd level, House threw down his game boy and looked around the hospital in disgust, glaring at all the tinsel, holly and lights. It was no surprise to anyone who knew him or had come in contact with him that he hated Christmas. He especially hated…carollers. House's head snapped up as he heard the familiar, whiney strains of cheerful singing coming around the corner.
We wish you a Merry Christmas;
We wish you a Merry Christmas;
We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Good tidings we bring to you and your kin;
Good tidings for Christmas and a Happy New Year.
"Hey! American Idol failures!" House yelled, "Cut the singing, some of us are trying to work!"
Dr Allison Cameron glanced up from her paperwork.
"They're only trying to spread some Christmas cheer," She asked, "Do you have to be so mean?"
"Hmm, let me think," House pretended to consider her comment, "Yes."
House noticed Dr Eric Foreman shivering.
"What, do you want to comment on my lack of Christmas cheer?" He demanded.
"Can you turn the heat up?" Foreman asked, hugging himself. "It's colder in here than out there."
"Oh, poor widdle Foreman is cold," House mocked, "you see this? This is a jacket. Do you see this? This is a sweater. They are called clothes. Normally, clothes are worn to keep warm." House shook his head. "Put a jacket on, Bozo, we're trying to conserve energy."
"Merry Christmas everyone!" House's rant was interrupted by Dr James Wilson.
"Dr Wilson, what is that on your head?" House asked.
"It's a Santa hat," Wilson said, "Merry Christmas, House."
"Merry? What the hell is 'merry' about it?" House snapped, "The only thing 'merry' about Christmas is knowing that the people stuck in this dump are going to be having a worse time than me. Have you people tried this hospital's pathetic excuse of turkey?"
"Come on, you can't honestly think that?" Wilson asked.
"Oh, but I do," House said, "It's all about commercialism, the big companies milking everything out of the little guy. Parents buying overpriced toys for spoilt children, which they will break a few hours after receiving them. The destruction of rain forests to make Christmas cards and paper, which will only get thrown away. I don't see what's so 'merry' about that."
"Christmas is about giving and spending time with family," Wilson spoke up.
"Oh, here we go again," House groaned.
"Christmastime is a good time, a kindlier, forgiving, charitable time when men and women see their one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely to their fellow creatures." Wilson stated.
"What's that, Dickens?" House questioned.
"Yes, but that's beside the point," Wilson sighed.
"You tell him, man," Foreman and Chase said together.
"One more word from you two and I'll shove Dr Cameron's candy canes down your throat." House growled. "Speaking of the candy canes, Cameron, nice touch. A great way to show Christmas spirit and spite at the same time!" House held up his cane.
"Why don't you have Christmas dinner with us?" Wilson offered, saving Cameron from embarrasment.
"Dinner with the Wilson clan, hmm, I think I have a prior engagement in hell." House snapped, throwing a candy cane at Wilson.
"Don't be like that!" Wilson sighed, frustrated, "Chase, Foreman, Cameron, you guys are coming?"
The three young doctors nodded.
"Why aren't you spending it with your families?" House demanded.
"The roads are blocked…" Foreman began.
"Like I really care," House snapped, losing interest.
"Cuddy is coming," Wilson said, smiling slyly.
"Oh, why didn't you say so?" House said sarcastically, "No!"
"Fine, be that way," Wilson replied, throwing his hand up in the air. "I shall keep my good humour and wish you a Merry Christmas."
"Idiot!" House exclaimed. "And he's made me late for my soap!" House glared at the young doctors, "I guess you three want tomorrow off."
All three nodded.
"The sick people won't heal themselves, but if you want to go to Wilson's dinner party, fine." House stood up. "That will be torture enough."
"Thanks, Dr House," Cameron spoke up, "and Merry Christmas!"
"Humbug! Bah!" House grumbled, leaving the room, "And all that crap."
A/N: So what did you all think of that? My first House fic and I would appreciate the reviews. I know, a predictable story line, but a classic. So if you were clapping in approval, please express that clapping in writing by clicking the button,bottom left.
Reviews make the world go round!