Notes:
This was supposed to be a one shot, but probably not haha. I suck at one shots and I want the sweet saleen to get some loving. This story plays between chapter 10 and 11 of my fic flight of the blackbird.
E rated for swearing and delicious fragging. See here how the relationships of Barricade/Robine and Starscream/Emily pairing came to life.
Also, I am aware that they could use their Holoforms to do their bidding instead of hiring humans, but where's the fun in that!
Chapter one: Human Decepticons?
The decepticons were at their designated new base, about 1 hour drive from the Autobot base. Their leader Starscream had, together with Soundwave, created a cautious treaty with the autobots and the humans.
They were antsy and the desert winds carrying sand didn't do their joints any good. Starscream had spoken with Optimus and Ratchet briefly and when he had asked how they had managed all this time the simultaneous, cheeky reply came " why, with humans of course". As if it was the most obvious thing in the world. It was true, humans had these vacuum things and miniscule hands that could dig into the sensitive seams. But the air commander didn't just want anyone tinkling with his systems so he had, with the help of the autobot leader, contacted the MIT department offering two available positions in the Decepticon forces as mechanics.
Sourcing two bright humans was easy, sourcing two bright humans who wanted to work with the Decepticon's..not so much. So far the applicants had denied the position but blatantly requested to work for the Prime in the interview. Which he politely declined as he had no need for them.
His team was starting to complain, getting restless and aggressive because of the sand that was stuck. They could shake it off but that cursed sand never completely disappeared.
The Commanders servo went to the bridge of his nose pinching the bridge in a very human gesture of frustration. Hearing a Ping he ignored it, he needed to think. Another ping, more urgent this time, both from his SIC soundwave.
/What is it?!/ he snapped trough the COM line agitated. There was silence for a klik before the neutral sounding vocals of the intelligence officer came trough. /We have two last Candidates that we have to interview today, the prime states he is -positive- about the two femme's/
Starscream raised his helm and cocked it. /Femmes?/ he repeated. hmm so far almost all of the applicants had been male, except for that strange looking human of which he wasn't sure if it was female or male.
An affirmative sound rang trough their COM line. /They have arrived with the Prime and are waiting in hangar 4/ the SIC said before shutting down the connection.
Venting trough his primary vents loudly he straightened his back strut, moved his wings up high in a proud position and gracefully exited his office towards the hangar.
He was about to enter hangar 4 and greet Optimus when he encountered a very agitated Barricade.
"YOU!" the scout bellowed and cursed as he moved towards the seeker. "You said you would fix this!" he hissed, denta's clenching as pain shot through his systems, that blasted earth dust digging deeper into his sensitive seams.
"I am working on it Barricade, as a matter of fact i-" the seeker spoke trying to explain that he had two potential candidates right there. But the interrogator wouldn't hear it.
"By hiring disgusting organics to clean us, how can that thought even cross your processor!" he spat sharp claws clenching in anger. "filthy fleshy beings touching our wires, bah! It's disgusting with their slimy little digits, had Lord Mega-".
"Enough!" Starscream snapped wings twitching in agitation, servo grabbing the scout and pushing him down, digits digging into the doorwing he had grabbed making the scout groan and kneel.
Starscream loomed over the other threateningly and bared his sharp dentae. ""No more words from you unless you plan on functioning as a toaster for the next couple of vorns."" He threatened in Cybertronian.
"We have guests so you do well as to behave" the jet growled before releasing the scout with a push.
"Yes Lord Commander Starscream" came the reluctant almost petulant reply from the black and white mech before he got up, gave a fierce glare at the -guests- as Starscream had called them. He raised his optic ridges as he noticed they were both femme. Optimus had moved close to them and was shaking his helm almost disappointingly and him.
Chuffing loudly, he sneered and twisted on his heel retreating with as much grace as his dirty systems allowed.
Starscream refocused on his candidates and cursed to himself. If they had doubts working for them they would most assuredly leave upon his arrival after seeing that little spectacle. His wings drooped some as he approached the group.
"Optimus" he replied wearily. "Starscream" came the reply, the autobot Commander's optics were twinkling with something that looked like mirth.
"And who might you two be" the jet asked exasperated expecting them to squeak and run, he twitched lightly as the red haired one spoke, her voice clear and direct.
"My name is Emily, and this is Robine" she introduced herself.
Starscream raised an optic ridge and appraised both femmes for a few kliks. "Right, and do you know why we invited you here?" he asked assuming they, like the others wanted to work for the autobots.
Robine frowned and put her hands in her sides. "To chat and picknick together, obviously" she said and rolled her eyes. "Honestly mr prime I expected him to be more intelligent" came the sassy reply from the short haired one.
Emily snickered but placed her hand on the others arm to reign her feisty friend in. she always had a mouth on her but she liked that about her best friend. Yes they knew exactly why they where here, as soon as Robine had seen the add she had almost forcefully made Emily apply with her.
Optimus let out a low rumble. "Just optimus is fine, really." He spoke in that deep baritone rumble. "Forgive the introductions, we have so far not been very successful in recruiting for these positions.
"Why?" came the genuine question from Emily. She was aware of the Decepticons reputation but was a firm believer of second chances and if you were a graduate of MIT, or almost graduate, working for the Transformers was a high tech Walhalla.
Starscream snorted unattractively before cocking his helm "And you femme's called me unintelligent" he sneered. "No one wishes to work for the misfits of the Cybertronian race, the dangerous killers and criminals" he said as he moved forward to the femme's flaring his wings threateningly.
Optimus buried his face into a servo and shook his helm, why did the jet make everything so difficult.
"Well, we do" Robine said shrugging, completely ignoring the jet as he tried to intimidate him. Robine was silent but nodded her agreement. "Honestly, we don't really care what fraction you are, you are Cybertronian. Same wires, same hydraulics. And we always had a thing for badboys" said the femme making Emily flush.
Optimus removed his servo in surprise as he heard the reply and looked up at the air commander who visibly deflated after hearing the words.
"Well, we do have plenty of how did you call it, -badboys- on base" he said looking almost apologetic as he referred to Barricades hissy fit from before.
Robine smirked "I liked that black and white one you were arguing with, he has sas".
"That would be barricade, he-.. he- is not very fond of human's or organics in general" Starscream explained. "Shall we commence with the practical part of the interview then?" he suggested looking at the prime who nodded his consent.
"Yes please" came the simultaneous reply from the enthusiastic femmes. Starscream looked a bit awkward as he knelt and offered his servo for Emily as Robine had already found purchase with the prime.
He hasn't allowed another organic to touch him, but he felt with Emily that it was alright, safe. His spark didn't clench in revulsion, it did quite the opposite when Emily climbed on and held tight almost beaming up at the Jet with a bright smile.
"Right" he said and carefully moved to the main hangar ignoring his spark hammering in its chamber. The hangar was bustling with activity, knock out was roughly shaking out a mech and pile of sand fell underneath the others pedes.
"Uhhng my processor "the shaken mech complained and rubbed his helm. "Stop your whining, It is the only way I have to remove that wretched sand!" the medic snarled not liking the procedure but not knowing anything else.
"Whoah dude, why not use a hoover?!" came the shocked reply from Robine. And suddenly the whole hangar was silent. Several pairs of red optics boring into the femme who spoke. They were surprised there as an organic at base, even more so that it was femme AND it had spoke in a rather rude tone to their medic.
Knock-out blinked his optics before looking from Prime to Robine "what?" he said drawing out the word.
"A hoover, you know, suction device, designed for removing dust?" she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
The shiny red mech remained quiet as he didn't know how to reply to that. He was aware of the human variant and had even seen it lying around, but none of them could handle it. It was too tiny.
Robine nudged the Prime asking to be placed on the floor. "Here we will show you" she said taking large strides to the still dizzy Decepticon on the floor.
Emily chuckled and looked up at Starscream "Do you have a vacuum nearby by any chance?" she asked politely. The jet nodded and turned to walk to a storage cabinet or some sorts, he placed Emily down.
"I remember when receiving the tour that there would be one in this cabinet, not sure if it functions "he replied. "That's ok, we will make it work" she said offering the other another smile before opening the door and grabbing it.
"Got it Robine!" she shouted dragging the hoover behind her. "alright, do we have power? " 110?"Emily asked looking around playing a bit with the electric plug.
Starscream took the plug from her "I think we have one here in one of the walls" he said and plugged it in. Robine turned the hoover on and cheered as it started working.
"Right, you, lay down and lay still" Robine said pointing at Black out. She looked like a weird ghost buster as she hauled the hoover behind her, she had removed the base of the suction foot and attached a smaller nozzle.
The large mech looked at Starscream for a klik, should he obey? This was just a weak organic but he felt like he should obey. His processor was still a scrambled mess from his shakedown session with knock out so he sat down folding his rotos in such a way that they didn't bother him as he sat his aft down.
""Black out, if you harm the femme I will offline you"" Starscream clicked threatingly in Cybertronian. The chopper held up his servo's in a gesture that he wouldn't.
Robine and Emily climbed on the large mech before curiously peaking into seams, learning the others frame. "Right, where does it hurt the most? The sand " Emily asked.
"Chest and groin plates" came the nervous reply. The mech was frozen, terrified he would accidently squish the tiny organics and get slagged by his commander.
"thank you" came the almost melodious reply from the red haired femme. "Robine, lets start with the chest plates as that is the highest risk now, we don't want sand getting into his spark" she said making the mech release a startled click. How did they know about his spark? His plating was drawn in tight as he did not feel comfortable with the organics on top of him.
Robine whent to work, meticulously and effective. Sucking away the dust and sand from al the sensitive seams. Black out leaned back and allowed himself to lay flat on the ground, and closed his optics at the blissfull feeling. Every second more of that horrible stuff got sucked up.
"a-AH that feels good, Starscream you gotta hire these femmes, they are very.. capable" he groaned. Flaring out his plating so the two could reach the deeper seams and wires, Robine didn't hesitate to dig in.
Optimus and Starscream shared a look and the autobot leader felt his faceplates heat up, he recalled that feeling all to well. Mika cleaning him with that vacuum. Closing his optics he felt a surge of arousal and almost his field to flare out.
The air Commander had felt it right before the prime reeled it back in."That good huh?" he said. Optimus nodded "hard to explain" he said ""you might want to, inform the femmes what the side effect of this treatment might be"" the semi clicked.
Starscream nodded "hmm..sure prime whatever you say" he murmured absentmindedly as he saw Emily using some sort of brush that she got from the base of the vacuum to brush hard between hard to reach crevasses.
Black out ignored the fact that they were organic, all that mattered was getting that gnarly stuff out, the pleasure that came with it was a wonderful bonus. The helicopter began clicking madly and slightly arching his back strut, cooling fans engaging as he was getting more and more worked up.
Starscream cleared his intake "I think that's enough for now" he said and picked both Emily and Robine up from a very exited mech. Black out released a low keen like noise and released an frustrated oath.
"But we aren't finished" came the reply from Emily. "Yeah the lady's aren't finished" came the agreement from the worked up mech.
"We also want to be cleaned!" came the reply from most of his team, they all had sand in their gears and desperately wanted it out, and by the looks of it this new treatment beat Knock out's.
Starscream raised a servo quieting the group "I will conclude the interview first and I do not know the planning of our newest recruits" he said slyly looking down at the two femmes in his servo.
Robine smirked and whooped "We're hired? Awesome!" she said hugging Emily who was chuckling. "Thank you Commander Starscream" Emily said politely, her green eyes boring into his red optics.
"No thank you. We are in desperate need of assistance and I am very pleased you both have accepted. We will discuss the terms and conditions of the contract in the office"
"Alright, g'bye!" Robine said waiving enthusiastically at the small group of Decepticons. Most of them gave a waive or nod back but when her eyes met Barricade's she frowned. The mech was openly glaring at her, his faceplates pulled into a snarl as if he just laid optics on the most disgusting thing he had ever seen. He even snarled and flared out his plating aggressively as he noticed Robine staring at him.
Glaring right back she narrowed her eyes and suppressed the urge to stick out her tongue to the other. What was his problem anyways.
Soon their staring match was interrupted as Starscream and Optimus moved back to the hangar. "how awesome is this Em, we are going to work with technology the world has never seen, they all seem nice so I don't understand why no one wanted to work for them." She whispered to the other.
"I'm pretty sure they can hear you" Emily said chuckling and forgoing the whispering. "I'm also very excited but we need to be careful ok? We need to establish ground rules and obey them" she said sternly to her over exited counterpart. The young woman was almost bouncing with energy.
"Barricade gave you quite the nasty stare though" Emily commented thoughtfully. "He will be monitored, Barricade is all bark and little bite' came the reply from Starscream. "but if it makes you feel better we will always have a chaperone with you when dealing with him?" The jet offered.
Robine smiled but shook her head "No, I'm sure I'll be fine, I can handle a cheeky cop".
Optimus chuckled. "I'm sure you can" he said in a strange knowingly tone before glancing and actually winking at Emily. Emily frowned and shook her head, this was going to be a bumpy ride.