"SING MY ANGEL OF MUSIC" Erik screamed, echoing in the vast underground waterway, "SING FOR ME!" He flailed his arms in the climax of Christine's song, puncturing the (ahem...inflatable) boat with the paddle. "Uhh...Christine." he said sheepishly, "we're gonna have to abandon ship."
"Why?" Christine argued.
"Because..." he replied.
"Why do we have to abandon ship?" she said in a shrill voice.
"MY GOD, WOMAN! JUST GET OFF THE BOAT!"
Christine did as she was told, carefully stepping out of the boat, which she noticed was losing air fast. "Inflatable?" she thought to herself. "Maybe that would explain the little rubber duckies painted all over it."
Meanwhile, Erik had fallen off the floatie, and was splashing, gurgling, and bubbling nearby Christine.
"HELP! I'M DROWNING! I CAN'T SWIM!" he said, desperate for air, swinging his arms wildly, attempting to stay above the murky water.
"Erik," said Christine bluntly, "The water's only two feet deep."
And indeed, Erik looked up, seeing Christine standing firmly upon the ground, towering a good 4 feet over his drowning figure.
"I knew that," he said unconvincingly, "I was just...acting."
By this time, the Phantom was standing on the ground, in the two foot deep water. "I am a VERY good actor, you know!"
He stormed off, turning a corner, leaving Christine standing in the shallow waters. She sighed, rolling her eyes when she heard a tremendous crash around the corner, what sounded like the clanging of metal against rocks.
"STILL ACTING!" he shouted back.
"Of course you are" she said to herself, sarcastically.
-
It had been a good twenty minutes since the boating incident, and Christine hadn't seen Erik since. She went looking for him, turning the corner that he had turned earlier.
"Erik?" she asked, when she heard a small noise, "is that you?"
As she completely turned the corner, the whole sight came into view: There he was, his hand deep within the cookie jar, chocolate smudged all over his mask, and his eyes wide, and his body frozen. Like a deer caught in the headlights.
"Erik...What are you doing?" Christine asked, both curious and disturbed.
"Errrr...IT WASN'T ME!" he said, even though the chocolate on his mask was obvious evidence. He had realize that Christine wasn't convinced with his excuse, so he added to it.
"THE MONKEY MADE ME DO IT!"
While Erik was "cleaning up" after the cookie fiasco, Christine was left alone to think.
"He's lost it, that's the only excuse. This isn't the man I fell in love with. He would never do things like this."
She desperately thought for some way to revive him from his child-like behavior
"His music!" she thought, "That would certainly do the trick!"
And so, as (a cleaner...chocolate-free) Erik entered the room once more, she asked him to sing for her."
"Erik," she said "will you...OH MY GOODNESS! A RAT!"
Christine was, of course, frightened by the small hairy thing following the Phantom.
"Rat?" Erik said confused, "This is no mere rat! This is the one, the only...Twinkie Puff the poodle!"
"Twinkie Puff?" Christine questioned, knowing that his mind was obviously lost, "You named him Twinkie Puff?"
"Well yes." He said, "I would have named him Mr. Tinkles, but that name is already taken by the alligator that lives in the water down here."
"Alligator?" she said, slightly frightened.
"Yes, alligator. I feed him broccoli." he then lowered his voice, so only Christine could hear, "You see, he is a vegetarian."
"Oh, of course." stated Christine, in mock understanding.
Once again remembering what she was to ask Erik, she interrupted his rambling of how Mr. Tinkles was teased as a child due to his odd eating habits.
"Erik. Will you sing for me?" She said this very sweetly, as if to help him remember the love he had for her.
"Sing?" he said, "Singing, my dear, is my specialty." He smirked, taking Christine by the hand into a part of the lair she had never laid her eyes on before.
It was a small dusty room, housing some sort of stage at the front. A large shiny, mirrored ball hung from the ceiling.
Seeing the confused look upon Christine's face, Erik explained, "My concert hall." he said plainly.
"Ahh." Christine replied, still slightly confused.
He sat Christine in a large chair opposite the stage, while he stepped up on it, adjusting his cape.
"What shall you be wanting to hear my darling?" he asked politely.
"Oh, anything your willing to sing for me."
"Exactly," he said, a smirk once again on his face, "I shall sing you one of my new favorites, no one has heard or seen me do this one before."
Thinking both that she was in for a treat, and that Erik had indeed regained his mental health. Christine happily awaited the Phantom's masterpiece.
The music started, Erik's back faced Christine, the music changed, he turned around.
"I think I did it again, I made you believe we're more than just friends" he sang this with great enthusiasm.
This was not what Christine had expected, this was nothing like Erik. But little did she know, the worst was coming.
The music raised, the lyrics changed: "Oops I did it again, I played with your heart, got lost in a game."
With these words Erik threw aside his cape, revealing a red spandex, sequined jumpsuit. Out of no where a spotlight shone upon his glittering figure, and a disco ball lowered from somewhere within the ceiling.
"Oops you think I'm in love, that I'm sent from abo-o-o-ove. I'm not. That. Innocent."
With this, the Phantom slid into kneeling positions, his hands held high into the hair, as if expecting a roaring applause.
Christine wasn't impressed.
"WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH ERIK?" She yelled, echoing in the vast cave.
"Uhhh," he replied quietly, "can I get a lifeline?"
"That's it," she was at her wit's end, "we are going to talk to Madam Giry!"
And with that, she left, dragging the sparkly Phantom by the hand, above to the Opera house...