The ashes from the cigarette I had lit dropped silently to the floor. So
silently, just like the way my sister did. In HIS hands, and his body, in
mine. I couldn't understand why, till now. The phone has been ringing
inconsistently, but so what? I wanted answers, answers from one person, not
answers or comfort from someone who isn't him.
Why? Why did he do this? Was it because I am the head of the Sumeragi clan? Or was it because he is an assassin, a Sakurazukamori? If this is so, why didn't he come after me, the prey that he had been toying with for so long? Wasn't it time to kill me? All these questions kept repeating in my mind, yet there is no answers to them. That is why I trained so hard, so long, because I wanted answers, from only one person. Seishirou.
Where were you, Seishirou? I had looked for you for so long, a prey looking for its predator. Funny, isn't it? Why would a prey look for its predator? You seem to be taunting me, aren't you, hiding away from me, wanting me to seek you out all these years. And now, I have finally found you, the predator.
You stood there smiling at me, the smile that cause my heart to break whenever I see it. You say you don't have any feelings for me, but do you know I do? Even after all these years, even if I had said I wanted revenge for my sister, I knew I couldn't hurt you. I wasn't able to…And our first meeting ended, causing me to lose sight of you again, but this time, I was set to find you, even if it means to literally hunt you down. Even if all the onmyouji despise me, I will not let my feelings for you fade away…
There's an old saying, one that says 'an eye for an eye', right? That saying has now become my wish, are you happy with it? But I never told anyone, for I knew they will be angry…or will they be sad? The day that I lost my eye, "Kamui" said I wanted him to be you. Was he telling the truth? I could sense your presence, but were you really near-by?
Hokuto asked me to go to the Rainbow Bridge, alone. I never found it strange, and I guessed I was an idiot. For that day, that very day, was the saddest day of my life after Hokuto's death. I could still remember it so vividly in my mind, as though it happened yesterday.
There I was, lighting up a cigarette, when you crept up silently behind me. You held my hand firmly, and laughed when I told you that the ashes were going to fall onto your hand. You told me I was still the same Subaru 9 years ago, but I told you I wasn't. I was lying of course, but you already knew it. Gently taking the cigarette away from me with your bloodied hands, I felt a wave of anger washed over me. You were still smiling, even when I began attacking you. But you cheated, you did not attack at all, but you were defending. I had no intentions of having others hurt, and so, I use the kekkai.
No sooner that I had did that, there you were, in front of me, my hand pierced through your heart. You held on to me tightly, gently pulling away yourself away from my hand, letting your blood rush out of the wound. I was shocked, I knew I wasn't possible to do that but what you said surprised me. My sister, my very own twin sister, had gave up her life just to cast this spell. But I did not even want any of them to die! Your body was getting colder as you told me how you did not care if you were going to be eaten by the Sakura, because you were killed by me. You came close to my ear, but I could not hear you at all because of the wind. Kamui and Arashi had arrived by then and as the bridge fell, no one could hear what I said to you, but at least you did. "I love you, Seishirou. Really."
Why? Why did he do this? Was it because I am the head of the Sumeragi clan? Or was it because he is an assassin, a Sakurazukamori? If this is so, why didn't he come after me, the prey that he had been toying with for so long? Wasn't it time to kill me? All these questions kept repeating in my mind, yet there is no answers to them. That is why I trained so hard, so long, because I wanted answers, from only one person. Seishirou.
Where were you, Seishirou? I had looked for you for so long, a prey looking for its predator. Funny, isn't it? Why would a prey look for its predator? You seem to be taunting me, aren't you, hiding away from me, wanting me to seek you out all these years. And now, I have finally found you, the predator.
You stood there smiling at me, the smile that cause my heart to break whenever I see it. You say you don't have any feelings for me, but do you know I do? Even after all these years, even if I had said I wanted revenge for my sister, I knew I couldn't hurt you. I wasn't able to…And our first meeting ended, causing me to lose sight of you again, but this time, I was set to find you, even if it means to literally hunt you down. Even if all the onmyouji despise me, I will not let my feelings for you fade away…
There's an old saying, one that says 'an eye for an eye', right? That saying has now become my wish, are you happy with it? But I never told anyone, for I knew they will be angry…or will they be sad? The day that I lost my eye, "Kamui" said I wanted him to be you. Was he telling the truth? I could sense your presence, but were you really near-by?
Hokuto asked me to go to the Rainbow Bridge, alone. I never found it strange, and I guessed I was an idiot. For that day, that very day, was the saddest day of my life after Hokuto's death. I could still remember it so vividly in my mind, as though it happened yesterday.
There I was, lighting up a cigarette, when you crept up silently behind me. You held my hand firmly, and laughed when I told you that the ashes were going to fall onto your hand. You told me I was still the same Subaru 9 years ago, but I told you I wasn't. I was lying of course, but you already knew it. Gently taking the cigarette away from me with your bloodied hands, I felt a wave of anger washed over me. You were still smiling, even when I began attacking you. But you cheated, you did not attack at all, but you were defending. I had no intentions of having others hurt, and so, I use the kekkai.
No sooner that I had did that, there you were, in front of me, my hand pierced through your heart. You held on to me tightly, gently pulling away yourself away from my hand, letting your blood rush out of the wound. I was shocked, I knew I wasn't possible to do that but what you said surprised me. My sister, my very own twin sister, had gave up her life just to cast this spell. But I did not even want any of them to die! Your body was getting colder as you told me how you did not care if you were going to be eaten by the Sakura, because you were killed by me. You came close to my ear, but I could not hear you at all because of the wind. Kamui and Arashi had arrived by then and as the bridge fell, no one could hear what I said to you, but at least you did. "I love you, Seishirou. Really."