When you cross life with death, you come up with an interesting result. Something that is in-between human and angel, the dead and the living, the good and the bad. Such is the fate of our hero, who was currently gazing up at the starry sky, pondering his own existence. His was a half-life—a cursed life. He had no place with the living, for he was never truly alive, save for the nights when the moon was dark. He also had no place with the dead, for he knew they were no family of his. They would never accept him—to them, he was a worthless, weak, run-of-the-mill half-breed. The rest of the time, he was merely a half-human, a half person. He felt less emotion, understood less pain, experienced less guilt. He was also quietly thankful for the fact that on those nights, he was unable to kill. Those nights, he could be normal. He could be kind, he could be gentle. He could want to hold Kagome without the demon notion that it was a sign of weakness.
How could he even exist? He pondered this quite often. A demon is dead by essence. A human is thoroughly alive. How, then, was it possible for the living to love the dead? How could the dead die? Was the only thing that awaited him once he became a real demon a life without anything dear and then an eternal ticket to hell? When he had become a demon, he knew not who Kagome was, let alone that he cared about her. But if he used the jewel shards instead of desperation, would his transformation still be brutal and bloodthirsty.
There was another thing that he could do with the jewel shards. He could become a human, as he would have done with Kikyo. But would he be able to protect Kagome if was only human? She was so fragile, so beautiful. Like glass. If she died, he would never forgive himself. So what now? He lives as a human with Kagome, he can't fight, Kagome dies. He lives as a demon and dies as a demon, Kagome still dies. What choice did he have? He would have to live as a half-demon until everyone he cared for was safe.
"InuYasha! Dinner! I made you ramen." Kagome's voice trailed out towards him in the field.
"Coming!" he hollered back. He took one last look at his currently clawless hands and sighed. No, he would have to wait. But someday, on a dark night, he would tell her. And someday, he would be happy.