I wrote this a while ago and completely forgot about it until now, so nothing in here is canon compliant. I just wanted Carlos back (with some sadness, because I have difficulty writing things that aren't at least a little bit sad). Title is from Hamlet's "To be or not to be" soliloquy ("But that the dread of something after death, / The undiscovered Country, from whose bourn / No Traveller returns").
Anyway, I hope you enjoy!
Warning: Temporary character death.
Disclaimer: I don't own WtNV.
Carlos had figured it out.
He had been trapped in the desert otherworld for months now - and regardless of what he said to Cecil, he did feel trapped, he'd just made things sound better than they were when he spoke to Cecil so he wouldn't worry - and he wanted very badly to get out. Of course, Doug and Alesha were lovely, as was Alesha's Prius-sized bichon frisé, but they weren't Cecil. Carlos missed Cecil so, so very much.
And he'd figured out how to get back to him.
It had all started when he and the masked warriors were chatting, and he had brought up the time when beings like them had passed through Night Vale, when the blinking red light on the mountain had appeared. At the behest of Doug and Alesha, Carlos had described the masked warriors and they had been identified as a group who had died a long time ago.
In fact, according to Doug and Alesha, they ought to have been dead at the time when they reached Night Vale.
That was the final piece of the puzzle that had helped everything slot into place. Of course, there was the usual way of going from Night Vale to the desert otherworld and vice versa - the old oak doors. But when Carlos had gone through the door, he had felt something strange run through his body and could have sworn that he felt his heart stop. If his theory was right, then that's exactly what had happened.
He didn't think that just dying in Night Vale made people go to the desert otherworld. After all, the town had a very high death count, and he hadn't seen anyone from there in the desert otherworld. The old oak doors seemed to be a conduit to direct people to the otherworld. But to get from the otherworld to Night Vale, if the story of the other warriors and the tests Carlos had performed were right, it was much simpler.
All Carlos had to do was die.
Which, in retrospect, wasn't actually that simple, so let's just forget Carlos referred to it as such.
But he had done tests - lots and lots of very scientific tests - and it did seem to work the way he expected. One of the masked warriors died one night after tripping and breaking his neck - he had been a klutz, and everyone had kind of expected it to happen before too long - and Cecil had excitedly called Carlos that night about the masked warrior sighting in the town. So yeah, all the evidence pointed to Carlos being right about his theory. But, considering he was (literally) putting his life on the line for this, he wanted to be absolutely, 110% sure.
Then Carlos got a weepy, drunk call from Cecil one night and his heart nearly broke as he listened to Cecil sob about how much he wanted him back and how Night Vale didn't even feel like home anymore when Carlos wasn't there. He had even admitted that he didn't feel like doing the radio show some days, even though he always did it anyway so Station Management wouldn't destroy him, of course, and that had cinched it. Cecil loved the radio show, and if he was feeling miserable enough he didn't want to do it, Carlos had to do something.
Doug and Alesha agreed to help him, and when Carlos requested that Alesha be the one to do it, they immediately said they would. Carlos liked Doug too, but Alesha seemed gentler, and in a circumstance like this, Carlos wanted gentle above all other things.
So they prepared. Alesha sharpened their knife. Carlos put everything he wanted to bring with him back to Night Vale in a small bag he could sling over his shoulder - he assumed that anything he was holding would go with him, but he didn't want to test it by bringing too many things. He didn't mind leaving everything behind if it would get him back to Cecil. Doug was going to keep the other masked warriors and Alesha's dog away, as Carlos really would prefer to die without too many witnesses.
"Are you ready?" Alesha asked. Carlos nodded.
"I'm ready." Alesha hugged Carlos from behind, which was a little awkward given that they were about two to three feet taller than he was, then they slit his throat.
Blood spurted out immediately - Alesha had severed Carlos' carotid artery - but it didn't really hurt, strangely enough. Alesha lowered Carlos to the ground slowly, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead as they brushed away his hair. It had grown long in the desert otherworld, not that it had really been short beforehand either, and was mingling with the blood sluggishly oozing out onto the sand. "Farewell," Alesha whispered. Carlos offered them a slight smile before closing his eyes and focusing as hard as he could on returning to Night Vale.
The blood continued to seep out, and when it stopped, so did Carlos' heart.
A second passed.
Carlos breathed in jaggedly, jerking upright. He was no longer lying on sand. He was lying on asphalt, in what looked like an old car lot.
A very familiar old car lot.
Old Woman Josie's old car lot.
Carlos began to laugh, even though the situation wasn't really funny, and found that once he started, he couldn't stop. "Thank you!" he yelled up at the sky, even though Alesha probably couldn't hear him. Behind him, he heard a door open and turned to see Old Woman Josie come out of her house, looking at him with an arched eyebrow.
"You're back, then, Mr. the Scientist," she stated. Oh, how Carlos had missed hearing himself referred to in such a way, the way only those of Night Vale did.
"Where's Cecil?" Carlos demanded, pushing himself shakily to his feet. A quick glance down showed that he was no longer covered in blood and his bag was still over his shoulder; thank heavens for small mercies.
"Well, home, I would think-" Old Woman Josie replied, but before she could finish what she was saying, Carlos had already sprinted off, running back home. God, he was home.
He heard people muttering as they saw him run down the streets and knew that Night Vale gossip would be at its highest that day, but everyone would find out that he had come back when Cecil reported on it on the show, which he undoubtedly would do, and Carlos really couldn't waste a single second before getting to Cecil.
He reached the house and banged on the door, each second that he was away from Cecil seeming to last minutes. Finally, he heard footsteps approaching the door and Cecil opened the door, looking a mess. His eyes went wide when he saw Carlos.
"Hi, Cecil," Carlos said quietly, grinning widely. Tears gathered in Cecil's eyes.
"Carlos?" he whispered. Carlos nodded.
"I'm here. I'm back." Cecil reached out for Carlos, his hand hovering right next to Carlos' face. With trembling movements, he placed his hand on Carlos' cheek, gasping when he made contact.
"You're really here?" Cecil whispered. Carlos nodded. A tear slipped down Cecil's face. Carlos thought he was going to cry as well.
"I'm really here."
Cecil grabbed Carlos and pulled him into the tightest hug Carlos had ever experienced. Carlos hugged back equally tightly (well, maybe not quite; Cecil was abnormally strong for a man his size), burying his face in Cecil's neck and simply breathing him.
"Carlos, my Carlos, my beautiful hero," Cecil whispered, repeating Carlos' name over and over.
"I missed you," Carlos choked out. "God, I missed you so much."
"How did you make your way back?" Cecil asked, pulling away and wiping at the tears that were streaming down his face. "Was there a door? Did you find a door?"
"I used science," Carlos replied after a moment of silence; he didn't plan on ever telling Cecil what he had actually done to return to Night Vale. "And now I'm back."
"Oh, Carlos," Cecil whispered, peppering Carlos' face with kisses. "Oh, Carlos."
"I love you," Carlos whispered. Cecil made a strangled sobbing noise.
"I love you so much," he whispered. "So, so much."
When Carlos pressed his lips to Cecil's, he knew that he was home.