A/N: As is often the case nowadays, this is mercscilla's fault. She suggested an AU where Miles Quaritch from Avatar is Taylor's brother and made some delicious art to go with it. My mind went insane. The end.
Warnings: Adultery, depiction of a threesome. Just, y'know, if you hadn't already guessed.
The Sixth Pilgrimage arrived without much fanfare. She escorted them back to the colony as usual, stood attentively through Nathaniel's speech as usual and, once everyone had cleared out to investigate their new home, scaled the stairs up to central command. As usual.
The office was empty, save Nathaniel. He was seated behind his desk when she entered, perusing a datapad with cautious interest. She didn't bother to announce her presence (he knew) and simply waited for him to finish and look up to greet her. When he did so, his expression was unexpectedly open – she saw an optimism on his face that had been missing for far too long and it made her heart beat a little faster.
"Sir?" She queried, approaching the desk slowly.
He smiled, handing her the pad. "He's coming, Wash."
She didn't need to read it to know who he meant. She pasted on a warm smile as her eyes passed over the form, reading facts and figures, stats and details she knew by rote anyway. She tried not to focus on the picture of the man in question but eventually her gaze was stolen by it. Something deep inside her gut clenched at the face that stared back at her.
Miles Taylor. Nathaniel's younger brother by five years. Chief of security on Pandora.
And now, apparently, future Terra Novan.
"They allowed him to cycle back?" She asked, seating herself and keeping the pad clutched in her hands. If Nathaniel noticed the whiteness of her knuckles he didn't say anything.
He nodded, leaning forward to place his elbows on his desk. He rested his chin on clasped hands and stared at a spot on the glass top, eyes unfocussed as he fell deep into thought. "He's been in transit for the past five years, longer than we've been out here. They actually listened to me when I requested him. Wish I knew why they couldn't tell me that sooner."
Alicia shrugged. "You know how it is. They've always been overly cautious considering the length of the flight."
He smiled at her in the way that made her knees weak (thank god she was sitting down) and shook his head. "Of course, you're right."
She grinned. "Say that again."
Rising from his chair with a laugh, he rounded the desk to pull her out of her own. His arms snaked around her, his closeness pressing the datapad into her chest as he rested his hands on her lower back. "Not a chance. Once is your lot."
"Dinner tonight?" He murmured, mouth pressing light kisses along her throat.
She sighed, shifting closer to him. A slow smile spread across her face when he nibbled lightly at the crook of her neck. "What you mean is, will I cook tonight?"
He bit down hard as punishment for her cheek and straightened, fixing her with an amused look at being so caught out. His face wore the expression so well that the change to concern it underwent soon after was particularly striking. "Are you okay? I know you two..."
Alicia shook her head, putting a hand over his mouth to stop him from talking. "Ancient history."
He sighed. "You know I want you to be happy, above anything else."
"You make me happy." She assured him.
"And you'd let me know if... anything changed that?" He asked.
"Of course." She said sincerely, knowing what he was really asking her. Whether she'd choose to leave him for his brother. She didn't know what worried her more – that he thought she would do that to him and was willing to let her, or that she couldn't say for certain that the situation would never occur.
She gave him a brief kiss to distract from her inner turmoil. "Don't forget to bring the wine tonight. We've got cause to celebrate, after all."
Guzman knocked on the door just as she reached it and stepped back to let her out with a smile. It was only once the door was shut behind her that she realised she still had the datapad in her hand. It came back to life when she ran her fingers lightly over the screen and she tapped on the picture to make it expand.
She stared into the glacier blue eyes that were so familiar to her, in more ways than one. Nothing was guaranteed to put her at ease more than a moment spent gazing into the depths of those eyes and seeing the warmth and love that their cool colour could not disguise reflected back to her.
Only this pair, these eyes, this poor technological representation had never done that to her. In fact, they did the exact opposite. She felt uncertain, ill at ease.
Jesus. And this was just a picture.
##
Alicia was 22 years old when she first laid eyes on Miles Taylor. He was 40. Twice her age, twice as fit, twice as powerful. She paid him the ultimate compliment (though he would never know) of instantly considering him a threat.
The night they met was one of her last memories of life in a world where you could breathe unaided if you went outdoors for more than five minutes at a time. It was Taylor and Ayani's anniversary and they had invited the entire unit around for a barbecue, one last hurrah before they shipped out to Somalia. Alicia arrived early and was still later than half of the men; though the only sight of them she got for her first hour at the Taylor homestead was seeing them huddled around the outdoor grill through the kitchen window.
Ayani meant well. She was a good friend to Alicia, took her firmly under her wing the first time Nathaniel introduced them and didn't let go for the rest of her life.
But she was also a meddlesome fiend.
She made the decision for Alicia that night that rather than spend time with her unit, arguing the finer points of culinary excellence as she did the rest of her days, she would rather spend it inside, gossiping.
Alicia didn't gossip. But, for Ayani, she could make a slight exception. She would converse politely – and, no matter what the older woman said, that did not count as gossiping.
Neither did it stop Ayani being a meddlesome fiend.
"Nathaniel's brother should be here soon." She said airily, focussing on cutting up vegetables.
Alicia nearly dropped the plates she was gathering from one of the cupboards. "Brother?"
Ayani nodded, seemingly unaware of Alicia's confusion. "Miles. He's a Marine, just got back from Nigeria with First Recon." Alicia placed the plates down carefully and slumped against the counter. "Oh my dear, did you not know?"
Alicia narrowed her eyes at the older woman. "No. When exactly would it have come up?"
"He led the assault on Abuja. It was all over the news." Ayani said, waving her knife carelessly.
"That Miles Taylor? Major Miles Taylor?"
"Colonel now, just promoted." Ayani corrected and then smirked. (Hell shuddered when Ayani Taylor smirked). "Sweetheart, did you really not make the connection?"
Alicia scowled at the term of endearment. No matter how many times she asked Ayani not to, it was like second nature for her to use such affectionate language. Didn't mean she had to like it, though. "There are a lot of Taylors in the military."
Ayani's no doubt incredibly witty (infuriating) response was cut off by the sound of a knock at the door and Alicia watched as her friend practically sprinted to the door. "Wait here!" She called over her shoulder and Alicia huffed out a laugh.
The kitchen was quite some distance from the front door and Alicia could only just make out the sounds of speech and laughter as Ayani greeted her brother-in-law. The sounds grew in volume and then faded as the pair passed straight by her, out through to the garden. Alicia remained steadfastly facing the other way, digging her toe into the kitchen floor as she crossed her arms over her chest, even when she heard the sound of introductions from behind her. She held out for all of thirty seconds before the compulsion to turn around became impossible to bear and she spun on her heel to look out of the window.
Ayani was standing with her arm around her husband's waist and together they were talking to a man whose back was to her.
She felt her eyes widen, her jaw slacken just a fraction. Now that was a back.
Ayani, in addition to being a meddlesome fiend, also had a sixth sense. The older woman's eyes locked onto hers and Alicia could see the sparkling amusement within their depths. Damn. She gestured with her head for her friend to join her and Ayani excused herself, slipping back into the house before she was even missed.
"Spill." Alicia said, not able to tear her eyes off of the garden.
"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about."
Alicia glared. "Bull. You're Ayani Taylor, you always have a plan. What is is this time?"
"Oh Alicia. Can't you tell?" Ayani said, leaning her elbow on the counter and turning side-on to her friend. Alicia shrugged. "No? Okay. How about this? Miles never married."
Alicia's jaw fell open completely this time. "Ayani! You can't seriously be trying to set me up with my CO's brother!"
"And why not? I want you to be happy, Alicia. I want you both to be happy." Ayani reached out to place a gentle hand on Alicia's forearm. "When was the last time you went on a date?"
Alicia's eyes closed. She was not having this conversation. She was not having this conversation with the wife of the man who was almost directly responsible for her remaining single. She settled for a half-truth. "It's been a while."
"See!" Ayani nudged her shoulder. "Just come and meet him."
Alicia sighed, knowing it was best to just relent now. "Okay, I can do that."
Ayani linked their arms and practically dragged her out to the garden. When Nathaniel saw them coming he smiled broadly and gestured for his brother to look at them. When he turned, Wash almost did a double take. Good lord they were similar. The only difference between the pair of them appeared to lie in the fact that Nathaniel was somewhat softened by only recently working within the United States, helping with the planning and strategising of the Somalia mission, whereas Miles had just returned back from a harsh tour of duty. He still had the air of a refined yet somewhat unstable weapon rather than a sleek, controlled force to be reckoned with.
"Miles, I'd like you to meet Sergeant Alicia Washington." Ayani said.
He smiled – as charming as his brother, slightly more roguish – and held out a hand. "A pleasure, Sergeant."
"Thank you Colonel. It's an honour to meet you." Alicia replied, shaking his hand and ignoring the way he held hers just a little too tight, a little too long.
Miles turned to Nathaniel. "This the medic you were telling me about?"
"Best damn combat medic I've ever served with." Nathaniel agreed, pride obvious.
Miles looked back at her with a grin. "Then the honour is all mine."
#
Alicia excused herself from the gathering a short while after the men with families to return to left, figuring she didn't want to put herself in the awkward position of inconveniencing a couple on their anniversary evening.
The night was mild, so she decided to walk the relatively short distance back into the city rather than waste money on public transport. She'd walked about three blocks when she heard the roar of a motorcycle approaching from behind. Thinking nothing of it she continued on her way, until it slowed down, passed her and stopped a short distance beyond.
The rider took off his helmet and she saw Miles Taylor smiling back at her. She didn't hasten her pace – though she sure as hell wanted to – and walked casually up to the side of the motorcycle, admiring the view.
"Evening Sergeant."
"Colonel." She replied, eyes fixed to the machinery. "Nice ride, sir."
He smiled, pleasantly surprised. "You a fan?"
"I've got three older brothers." She said, finally looking up at his face. "It was unavoidable, sir."
He continued to smile as he sized her up. She let him, curious as to what he would determine about her. It also allowed her a chance to quietly appreciate the man in front of her which, in her opinion, was no great loss.
"You heading back to the city?"
"That's the plan, sir."
"Don't suppose I could get you to join me for a drink?"
Alicia grinned. "Not sure that'd be entirely a good idea, sir."
"Precisely why I'm offering." He patted the back seat of the bike. "Hop on." She hesitated for a moment (a fraction of a second, really, enough to show him that she wasn't completely suggestible), before walking to the edge of the sidewalk. "Spare helmet in the back."
She pulled it on and wrapped her arms around his torso, the leather of his jacket invitingly warm under her hands as they rode back towards the city.
#
"You're on the Pandora mission?" Alicia blurted, spinning on her bar stool to face him.
"Say that again, bit louder. Don't think they heard you in Canada." Miles muttered.
Internally she grimaced, yet her face remained impassive. "Sorry, sir. Never expected to meet someone who could claim that."
"Never expected to be able to claim it myself." He admitted. "Hell of a commitment."
"How long does it take to get out there?" She asked, forcing herself not to question him on why he'd made the choice to commit.
"Little over 5 years." He said. "Truth be told, I could do with the sleep."
Alicia laughed, downing the rest of her (absolutely fantastic and far too expensive) Scotch and hopping down off the stool. "I'll be right back."
She escaped to the bathroom, taking her time in front of the mirror as she considered the evening. If Ayani were here she'd be telling her to go for it. If Taylor were here... well, that was something that no good would come of considering. Somehow she suspected he wouldn't be quite so thrilled with his wife's scheming.
In the grand scheme of things, what she chose tonight didn't really matter. In a week she would be in Africa and he would be on a spaceship, hurtling at the speed of light to another planet's moon. She was perfectly used to nights with no strings attached and odds were good she'd never see him again.
Except for the reminder every damn day when she looked at her commanding officer.
It was this that made her mind up. She liked what she'd seen of Miles over the course of the past few hours; he made her laugh, owned a kickass bike and didn't mind shelling out for good liquor. But she could also tell he had a hell of temper and was wildly unpredictable. Such things always gave her pause in men, military or otherwise. Especially military.
Giving her reflection a resolute nod she left the bathroom with her mind made up.
The doors to the bathroom were in a darkened corridor to the back of the bar. She was walking towards the light of the main room when a hand grabbed her wrist and pulled her backwards. Her first instinctive reaction was to throw her head back and stamp hard with her booted foot on the instep of her attacker, but they were quicker, hands reaching for her shoulders and shoving her into the wall. She just got her hands in front of her in time to avoid a heavy collision and was ready to kick and punch and generally make a nuisance of herself when her assailant spun her around and she found herself staring at Miles Taylor's amused face.
"Not bad. Could do with going in a little hotter in the first place though."
"The hell you think you're doing?" She demanded, bringing her hands up to push at his shoulders. "Get off me."
"That'd be get off me, sir." He replied, but did as she asked.
"My apologies sir, I tend to forget my propriety when assaulted." She ground out.
He chuckled again, bringing a hand up to rest on her cheek. The weight could have felt restraining, but there was something comforting, affectionate about it. She hated that she couldn't figure him out.
"I'm not sure what to make of you Sergeant."
"That makes two of us, sir."
"Call me Miles." He whispered, before leaning in and capturing her lips with his own.
Her first thought, after the initial 'holy fuck he's kissing me' surprise was that he damn well knew what he was doing. His tongue and teeth teased just the right amount to be enjoyably frustrating, his hand falling to the back of her neck as her own rested lightly on his hips.
"Yes sir." She replied when his mouth left hers to move along her jawline.
He laughed against her skin. "On second thoughts, keep the title."
He kissed her again, pressing her harder into the wall with the weight of his body. She brought her arms up around his neck to hold him against her, as one of his hands reached down to run along her thigh.
"I ship out in a week." She groaned when they broke for air, head falling back when his hips tilted suggestively against hers.
"So do I." He reminded her.
"This is a terrible idea."
He shrugged, hand continuing up her thigh to end up cupping her ass. "Probably. You got a place in the city?"
She shook her head, groaning as he kneaded the muscle of her backside. "Not here long enough. Just in the barracks."
He stepped away from her and praise be she managed not to whimper. He took her hand and led her towards the exit. "My place it is then."
##
The Seventh Pilgrimage arrived without much fanfare. Considering two factors, this was quite an achievement:
1. The Sixers had departed the colony three weeks previous and with no way of contacting the future they didn't have the first clue what to expect through the portal and;
2. Colonel Miles Taylor, veteran of several wars and one relatively short mission to a faraway land, was due to arrive.
The man she left behind over a decade ago was not the one standing in front of her now. She noticed the marks on his arms first and it was only when she rushed to him with oxygen that she noticed the three scars on the side of his head. She tried to force him down onto a nearby log but he resisted, strength far outweighing her minimal attempts to seat him.
"What the hell happened to you?" The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them.
He grinned at her and at least that was the same, that cheeky Taylor smile. "Long story. Tell it to you sometime." He said, words muffled through the mask.
"It's quite a walk back, tell me on the way." She said, realising how tightly she was clutching his forearm at the last minute. "But for now, sit the hell down."
"Yes Ma'am." He drawled. The speed with which he did as she asked was enough indication for her that he wasn't completely immune to the effects this strange new land – she knew from experience that the man didn't capitulate easily (in any situation).
It allowed her to leave him for a short while and perform a pilgrim inventory, checking everyone had arrived and that they were all being treated adequately. It was a damn good thing she'd done such a task often enough because her concentration was shot. Her body thrummed with awareness of the younger Taylor brother, every nerve ending firing to life after one brief moment of skin-to-skin contact.
How did she remember so clearly after all these years? One night a lifetime ago (okay, damn... three nights, but a quickie before he left for his connection to the ISV taking him to Pandora didn't really count) shouldn't still be able to affect her this much. She'd made certain of that – Somalia had made certain of that.
She mentally shook herself when Guz informed her they were ready to ship out and let him take point, dropping back to stand by Miles as he gathered up his things. The oxygen mask was hanging from around his neck as he joined her, a single concession to the knowledge that she would prod at him over not wearing it.
"So, the scars?" She asked as they started their walk, bringing up the rear of the group. She was on high alert, but still more than able to carry on a conversation with her gun primed, ready for action.
He grinned. "You like them?"
"They add a certain... something, sir." She responded, pretending his question didn't have any hidden meaning.
"Miles." He corrected and she damn near shuddered at the flash of memory (hands on her ass, tongue battling hers) that that invoked.
"Colonel." She retorted, finding her inner calm and grasping it with both hands.
"You always did like titles, Lieutenant."
She rolled her eyes and he looked shocked (just for a second, his reaction times still dulled by the trip). He wasn't used to this her, this Alicia, this Lieutenant Washington. He hadn't earned the right to know her, yet.
"First day out." He said eventually, when it became clear she wasn't going to talk again. "Felt like a damn fool."
"I'll bet." She said quietly, radar on her rifle picking up movement way off in the distance. It turned and headed away from them and she relaxed again, turning to him. "We got our own indigenous life here, Colonel. You ready for the challenge?"
He grinned wickedly at her (this time her stomach didn't flip, success). "Always."
##
Wash hesitated in the back doorway of Nathaniel's office, watching the man as he looked out over the outdoor shooting range. She knew what was going on down there at the moment. She should be there too, it was usually her who administered the weapons proficiency test, at Nathaniel's request. But she'd successfully managed to double book herself (benefits of being responsible for drawing up the duty rosters) and Guzman was in charge instead.
Better to avoid awkward situations while she got her head on straight rather than risk another series of unfortunate flashbacks like at the portal.
She walked out to join Nathaniel, under no doubt that he'd been aware of her presence for almost as long as she'd been standing behind him. At least she could trust him to never comment on it.
"He's good." She said eventually, after the pair of them had observed the range in silence. "Better than you."
He chuckled at her teasing. "He always was our father's favourite. Better marksman from almost as soon as he could hold a gun straight."
She tipped her head to the side as she watched Miles. "Better than me, do you think?"
Nathaniel looked over at her carefully. "No comment."
"Oh I see!" She grinned turning to him. "You're a chicken, now?"
He reached out and chucked her under the chin with a smile. "You could always set up a challenge?"
She just rolled her eyes, recognising an attempt to change the subject when she saw it. "What, so you don't have to make a choice?"
He leant heavier on the railing at her words. "It's great having him here, Wash. But you know I'd always choose you."
Alicia swore her heart stopped in that moment. Her senses started screaming at her that was it, one of those moments that would come back to haunt her, her next words would determine the course of events in the future that she couldn't even contemplate occurring right now.
So she took the easy way out.
She sidled closer to him and covered one of his hands with her own, squeezing reassuringly. Together they stood, a united force.
United against what exactly, Alicia wasn't yet sure.
##
Alicia avoided Miles for three days.
Well. Avoided was a strong word.
She didn't exactly not see the man, it was unavoidable when he was both joining the security forces and undergoing survival training at her instruction. But she didn't spend more than five minutes with him alone in those three days, always had somewhere else to be, someone else to meet, an apology tripping off her lips with ease.
The most recent time she had done so, he'd smiled at her in such a way that she knew he was aware of what she was doing.
Which meant she'd have to try another tack. That Nathaniel made a suggestion to her at the exact moment she'd made her mind up to do so was just a happy coincidence.
"Colonel!" She called, jogging up behind the man as he headed towards the barracks.
It was getting dark, most people were heading home for the evening. She hoped she'd judged his reasons for being so far away from his own quarters correctly.
"Lieutenant." He greeted, hands falling to his hips. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"You free for an hour?" She asked, smiling when his eyes sparked with curiosity.
"I can be free for you."
She scoffed and walked past him, knowing he would follow. It was an easy way to ensure that he would be unaware of the thoughts flooding her mind at her words, the uncertainty on her face as she contemplated whether following her Commander's orders was going to be such a good idea.
She led him through to the training ground as the sun dipped below the horizon. The imitation torches around the sides of the open-air arena had been lit, lending the entire area a strange orange glow.
"Your brother wants me to administer a combat exam." She said, falling into a relaxed stance in the middle of the dirt floor.
"Privately?" He smiled, standing just close enough for his presence to tug at her memories.
She smirked. "Don't think he wants you to suffer the humiliation of being beaten by a girl."
He matched her self-satisfied expression. "You reckon?"
She shrugged, easing off her jacket and unbuckling her thigh holster, moving to the side of the room. "Pandora's low gravity right? Gotta make sure it didn't make you... soft."
Her suggestive pause suddenly seemed like the best idea in the world when she turned and found he'd removed his jacket also, tan arms shining in the low light. She knew that if she hadn't used the turn of phrase she would have just stopped talking altogether, struck dumb by the sight in front of her. Definitely not soft.
"Think I need to worry Lieutenant?"
She grinned, passing him on her way back into the centre of the arena. "Doesn't matter what I think, sir. Matters what you do."
He laughed at her challenge, joining her and falling into a preparatory stance, trying to judge her first move. Now this she could handle.
She feinted with her first so that his attention was drawn to her upper body at the exact moment her leg swung out and took his out from underneath him, landing him on his back in the dirt. He coughed, winded, not anticipating her strength. If this were anyone else she'd help him up but she wasn't going to give him that opening - she knew he'd take it.
She waited for him to rise from the floor, bouncing from foot to foot to keep her heart rate up. He smiled ruefully at her for a second, brushing dirt off of his hands. His face told her that he wouldn't make the mistake of underestimating her again and that was enough of a victory in her eyes – she felt he might have accepted her as a threat the same way she had him. This was their second first meeting and she was going to enjoy the hell out of it.
They sparred for close to an hour, though it was ten minutes before he got her on the floor for any period of time. She was small, quick and he was used to facing big, hulking masses from the inside of a big, hulking machine. She had age and size on her side, but he had experience and strength.
He also knew how to play dirty, exploit his assets to her detriment.
He got her in a hold that meant she had to scrabble at his arms to pull him off her and the feel of the muscles under her fingers made her pulse quicken in all the wrong ways. Her lapse of concentration allowed him to shove her face-first onto the ground and straddle her, pulling her arm up behind her back to hold her still.
"Yield?" He asked.
Fortunately, she knew how to play dirty too.
She moaned, back arching and pressing her ass into his groin. He hissed as his hold on her slackened and she used the opportunity to wriggle out from underneath him, back up on her feet even as he was still on his knees in the dirt.
"What?" She said coyly when he glared at her.
He came at her quickly and they were back into it again. The cycle of triumphs and yields continued apace, even as they tired under the moonlight.
She got him on the ground with one particularly well timed take-down but her speed to position her fatigued body and hold him there was just not great enough, allowing him to switch their positions and push her into the ground with an arm across her throat.
"Yield?" He asked again.
She narrowed her eyes at him. He stared back at her, blue eyes bright with amusement and... oh Christ. She should get up. Yield. She told herself. Her mind screamed at her. Yield! He doesn't know about Nathaniel! Yield! Tell him! But she couldn't bring herself to do so, not when his gaze on her darkened and she became painfully aware of how close his face was to hers. A few inches and...
He lowered his head and his lips crashed against hers and it was suddenly as if the past twelve years hadn't happened. She was once again pinned down by him, enjoying the feel of his mouth against hers.
But twelve years had passed. And now she had something to compare him to. The scratch of beard against her skin was striking in its absence, the arm against her throat alien and the hand on her arm too hard. Her mind replaced these features with what they should be so easily that she squeaked and tore her lips away, pushing him off her before he could even question why.
She shot over to the side of the arena and pulled on her jacket. Clutching her gun in her hand she turned back to see Miles on his back on the floor, hands pressed to his forehead as he fought to control his breathing.
"Wash." He ventured and she jerked, her nickname sounding wrong from his mouth.
"You pass." She muttered before she fled, back to reality. Back to Nathaniel.
##
If Alicia thought the first three days of Miles being in Terra Nova were bad, the three following him kissing her were sheer torture. She only had to walk past the barracks to lose her train of thought, often forgetting where she was even heading in the first place. She felt young again, which she would have expected to feel nice but instead was an intense distraction. All of her careless fantasies of life back when it was simple, not full of war and loss and terror suddenly seemed ridiculous – being young was a nightmare that it was a pleasure to escape from.
The only good thing about the days that passed was that they had long since been set aside as preparation time for a big mission Nathaniel, Guz and one of the new kids, Reynolds, would be taking out to Outpost Three.
The week leading up to any mission was a special time for her and Nathaniel. They tended to spend every night together, just in case, usually moving into her quarters temporarily. They spent their evenings working on reports, requisition forms, reviewing the information send through with each pilgrimage; sharing their lives in the most intimate way they knew how.
It was one such evening, a Saturday night, when there was a knock at her door.
The pair of them were seated around her kitchen table, the surface littered with plexes and datapads as they worked in companionable silence. (They'd done things a bit backwards that evening – she had abandoned her attempts at cooking when he came in from training, sweaty and dirty and fuckable, instead dragging him through to the bedroom before he could even say hello.)
They shared a look, not recognising the noise. Guz was the only one who would know to find them here and it was definitely not his knock.
Alicia stood and gathered a shirt from the pile of freshly laundered clothes, throwing it at Nathaniel with a look that said 'put that on' before heading for the door.
She opened it to reveal Miles standing on her porch with a bottle of Scotch in his hand. "Lieutenant." He greeted.
Alicia stepped out of the door and shut it behind her before either brother realised what was going on. Leaning against it with a smile, she crossed her arms defensively across her chest and prayed her hair wasn't as tangled as Nathaniel usually made it. "Colonel."
"Came to apologise." He said, holding out the bottle.
Alicia laughed. "You?"
"It's been known to happen." Miles said, dropping the bottle on the floor beside the door when she didn't take it from him. "Can I come in?"
Alicia straightened. "Not sure that'd be a good idea."
"Come on." He smiled. "Don't hold a grudge."
Alicia scowled. "I'm not holding a grudge! I'd just like to be alone tonight."
It was a stupid thing to say. There was something clearly up with her and she wasn't doing anything to assuage the suspicions he might be having about her behaviour. It also gave the universe an opening to well and truly fuck with her, which was something she normally avoided like the plague.
Because only she would have the bad luck to claim to want to be alone just as the door to her quarters opened and revealed Nathaniel Taylor.
"Alone. Sure." Miles muttered, shooting her a glare that, luckily, Nathaniel missed.
"Miles!" He said with genuine pleasure. "What are you doing here?" His hand fell to Wash's hip and she tried (and failed) not to take the gesture in the possessive way it was intended.
"Just passing." He lied; it was easy, a talent of his she had always been wary of.
"Well come on in, we're just working on some reports." Nathaniel said, stepping back to leave a path for his brother to enter. "We haven't had a chance for the three of us to properly catch up yet, after all."
For a split second she thought Miles might actually agree. That he would be furious enough with her to ruin her evening as well as his own. To sit through hours of getting drunk with his brother and his brother's girl, remembering the days that she used to be his - however brief those were.
"Think I'll pass." He said, walking backwards to the steps.
Alicia stood silently beside Nathaniel as the pair of them watched Miles walk away, pleading with the universe for him not to put all of the strange occurrences recently together and end up working the whole situation out.
Instead he placed his hands on her hips and tugged her back into him as he re-entered her quarters, lips pressing to her neck.
"Nathaniel..." She grumbled but went willingly, shutting the door on a porch full of awkwardness.
She left the Scotch on her doorstep. It was gone in the morning.
##
Two days later, Alicia knocked on the door to Mile's quarters at 2230. She tried to convince herself as she stood, awkwardly waiting, that this was simply the earliest opportunity she'd had to visit and try to clear the air.
That was a lie.
She'd had plenty of chances to stop him and talk about what had happened. She had looked at those chances, considered them carefully, and then turned and walked in the opposite direction. For two entire days.
She was not used to being so unsettled by a man. Everything in her conscience was screaming at her to do the right thing, let him down gently, explain, tactfully, how long things had been going on with Nathaniel. How she loved him.
Because she did love him.
That was what made the butterflies in her stomach when she saw Miles so impossible to stand. Whenever she looked at him she was suddenly 22 years old again – young, pliable, easily impressed and desperately in love with her commanding officer.
Only one of those things was still true and she hated being reminded of the others.
None of these things stopped her staring. When Miles ambled through the colony and chatted to the duty soldiers; when he compared technique with the younger recruits at the shooting range; when he challenged the older soldiers in sparring sessions, sweat glistening on his arms and shoulders as he took every one of them down to the floor of the training ground.
The floor of the training ground.
Her eyes shut in remembrance and she bit the inside of her cheek to hold back the frustrated groan building in her throat.
He was taking his time to get to the door. It was this fact alone that made her realise he knew she was there. He was weighing his options, much as she would in the same situation. Humiliation was a hell of a cross to bear for people like them, pride and self-belief often the only things holding them together after years of combat and loss.
Eventually the door opened and Miles stood there, arms crossed, glass of scotch in hand. "Yes?"
She just about managed not to wince. "I wanted to explain."
He nodded slowly, looking beyond her rather than at her. "So explain."
"Can I come in?" She asked.
A shrug. "Maybe. Depends on the explanation."
Alicia bit the inside of her cheek again. If she wasn't careful she'd chew right through it, but the damn man knew how to push her buttons. He was as stubborn as a mule, just like Nathaniel, but mean with it. He'd see her humiliated in response to her treatment of him before he'd forgive her, and that was where the two brothers differed.
One of them could hold a hell of a grudge.
"Where do you want me to start?" She asked, because she was going to put the ball in his damn court as frequently as she could during this conversation if it killed her.
"How long have you been fucking my brother?" He asked coldly.
"Four years." She replied. "Next?"
He looked a little surprised by her easy capitulation, but she reasoned that was due to the alcohol dulling his reaction times rather than a genuine slip of his emotions. It helped to think that way. "When were you planning on telling me?"
He had her there, and he knew it, the triumphant look on his face so damn smug that her right hand instinctively curled into a fist, ready to smack it off.
"Were you planning on telling me?" He asked, straightening at her continued silence. "Goddamn. I didn't think you were such a cold-hearted bitch."
"Fuck you." She spat, flexing her hand unconsciously.
He smirked, leaning up against the door. "Now there's a proposition."
Alicia couldn't hold back the growl of disgust as she turned on her heel and marched back down the steps. Time to fall back and regroup because she wasn't going to get any sense out of him like this. It was too soon, she'd known it the moment she'd planted herself in front of his door.
"Didn't think you walked away from a fight, Lieutenant." Miles called and her feet stumbled to a stop. A passing soldier gave her a curious glance and her decision to visit so late suddenly seemed like a horrible idea. The last thing she needed was for this to become gossip fodder.
And he was right. She wouldn't walk away from a fight. She emerged victorious. Every time.
"What do you want me to say?" She asked, walking up to his door again. "I'm sorry? Will that do? Or does the great Miles Taylor require some more elaborate supplication?"
"I don't take kindly to being played."
"I don't take kindly to being kissed out of the blue by a man that hasn't been around to show interest in me for over a decade!"
"So damn well tell me that!" He growled, walking out of the house towards her. "Don't act like a schoolgirl around me after!"
Alicia glowered at him to hide the clenching of her gut. She had reacted in the worst possible way, looking back on it. How Nathaniel hadn't figured out what was wrong with her so far was a miracle.
They stood there for god knows how long, breathing heavily as they stared each other down. Alicia looked deep into his blue, blue eyes and saw something entirely too familiar for her liking. That was the final straw. She broke his gaze and took a step back.
"I'm sorry." She said, meaning it.
She turned to leave but he grabbed her wrist, hand wrapping around her with just enough strength to be a warning. "Alicia..."
She cursed silently. Nathaniel barely ever called her that; it was even worse hearing it from Miles.
"Don't." She said, turning back to him.
"Don't what?"
"Don't make me choose." She whispered.
His eyes darkened, surprised and pleased by her admission. She hadn't meant to say it, but hell, it was out there now.
"Who said anything about a choice?" He murmured, starting to walk backwards and lead her with him.
"There'll always be a choice." Eventually. Taylor men don't share.
He inclined his head, one side of his mouth quirking up. "Only choice I can see tonight is are you coming inside?"
It was a ridiculous thing to say, simplified the situation to an extent that she couldn't abide. But he changed his grip on her wrist until their hands were linked and the heat of his touch soothed her worries. She allowed him to pull her into the quarters and shut the door behind her.
He brushed past her, too close, heading for the kitchen to pour her a drink. She took it from him when it was offered and sipped it, using the simple act to calm her nerves regarding the inevitable. She swallowed the amber liquid and let it burn her throat. When the sensation struck her as strangely familiar she frowned down at the glass.
"Remember?" Miles asked, smiling at her from his position leaning against the counter.
"I do." She laughed. They'd drunk the same the night they first met. "How did you get this?"
"Brought it with me. Saving it for the right time."
"Which is now?"
He shrugged. "Isn't it?"
She placed her glass down and rounded on him before she could change her mind, grasping his head and pulling his lips against hers. He smiled against her lips and hoisted her into the air to sit her on the counter, pushing her legs apart to step between them.
It was never going to be perfect, the two of them were too full of indecision and simmering resentment to pay much attention to the other's needs. He brought her over once on the counter without, she suspected, even meaning to. Then he gathered her up in his arms while she was still coming down and took her through to his bedroom like some kind of trophy.
"I can fucking walk." She huffed when he put her down, swiping her hair out of her face while trying to remain steady on shaky legs.
"Thought you liked the chivalrous crap?" He baited, removing his pants without preamble.
She scowled, even as she openly admired his physique – broader than Nathaniel in more ways that one. And that, she determined, was the last damn time her mind was going to make any kind of comparison. "I don't need it from you."
"Oh, well." He said, walking to her and turning her in his arms so that her back was to his chest. "In that case..." He brought a hand between them and pushed hard in the middle of her back to bend her over the edge of the bed.
She dropped her head to the covers when he entered her, biting hard at her hand to stop herself crying out. His hands were hard on her hips, leaving behind marks she'd wear for days – a further idiocy that she hadn't bothered contemplating before she made the decision to visit him.
This time he came and she didn't, which she suspected he did on purpose - her punishment for the other evening.
She watched him for quite some time afterwards as he slept, completely closed off to her in a way that Nathaniel never would be.
Nathaniel.
She felt sick to her stomach as the image of him OTG on a mission, sleeping in the Outpost with Guz and Reynolds came to her mind, completely unaware of her betrayal. With one last look to the man sleeping beside her she slipped out of the bed and through to the main living area to collect her clothing and escape back to central command.
It was the most cowardly thing she had ever done.
Considering the night she'd had, that was quite a claim.
##
Wash was waiting in Nathaniel's office when the call went up from the gate that the rover had been sighted. She forced herself back down into the seat she had reflexively left, reminding herself that she no longer had the right to go and greet him like she usually would. She lost that right when she slept with his brother.
So she waited. Eventually she heard boots on the stairs and recognised the rhythm of the footsteps as her CO's. He walked into his office with a oddly casual stance which faded into relieved pleasure the minute he saw her. He hadn't been sure she'd be waiting for him, she realised.
She would always be waiting for him.
The thought struck her like a hammer blow. She would always be waiting for him. She loved this man with her entire being, had loved him for more than half her life. Why was she letting another man ruin that? Why was she so fixated on Miles Taylor? The danger? All the ways he reminded her of Nathaniel?
All the ways he didn't?
She stood and rushed towards him, throwing her arms around him and kissing him as if her life depended on it. He pulled away with a laugh, gently easing her arms back down.
"What did I do to deserve that greeting?" He smiled, stroking a hand over her cheek fondly. Her face must have told him all he needed to know (she never could lie to him) because a cloud of concern passed over his expressive face. "What's wrong Wash?" She tried to laugh, to pull away but his hand caught her elbow, hard. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong." She said and it was the least convincing two words that had ever left her mouth.
"Don't lie to me." He warned, voice dropping to a low rumble. "Wash, tell me."
She felt the sting of tears at her eyes and cursed herself, looking down at his hand on her arm. How much longer would she be able to experience his touch, harsh though it now was? How much longer before she wouldn't even be welcome in his presence? She didn't deserve it now.
She looked back up into his eyes, seeing them soften when he saw their moistness and then, almost instantaneously, harden. "No." He said, dropping her elbow.
"Nathaniel." She pleaded, reaching out for him. He ducked away from her hand. "Please."
"When?" He asked, walking around her to his desk.
"Last night." She said, refusing to even hesitate. It was her confession to make and she would hold her head as high as possible when doing so, he deserved that much.
"You remember what I told you?" He asked, picking up a datapad and pretending to read it.
She nodded, still imploring him to look at her with the honesty in her eyes. He would let her go, if she asked him to. He was already shutting himself off from her. "Yes, I do. But believe me, I don't want–."
"Looks like you have a choice to make, Lieutenant." He said, walking away from her and into the room at the centre of the building, as effective a dismissal as she was ever likely to receive.
She cursed, out loud this time.
There'll always be a choice.
#
She made herself disappear for the rest of the day. Went back to her quarters and pretended to sleep, pretended to live life as if the day was a normal day.
As if her days would ever be normal again.
She cooked dinner, ate in silence. Washed it down with half the bottle of wine that Boylan had given her for her last birthday. It was when she was cleaning the dishes that her comm. unit beeped with the alert assigned to Nathaniel. Her heart lifted as she hastily wiped her hands and answered with her surname, hoping her voice didn't tremble as she expected.
"Report to my office in ten minutes, Lieutenant." Was all she heard before the line went dead.
Ten minutes.
She was there in five.
Hesitating for the briefest of moments she stepped inside to find both Taylor brothers standing by the conference table, talking in hushed tones. She frowned at her surprise that neither had a mark on them, wondering why she'd expected them to get into some big pissing contest over her – they were grown, military men. Brothers. Such childish actions were well beneath them.
"Wash." Nathaniel greeted, his earlier coldness gone.
That was a good sign, right?
"Commander. Colonel." She greeted, sticking to formality when everything else was abandoning her.
"When I informed you that my brother was coming to Terra Nova, what did I tell you?"
"That you wanted me to be happy." She responded quietly.
"And you told me?"
"That you made me happy."
"Is that still true?"
She gaped at him. "Yes!"
"Yet you slept with Miles." He said.
She felt herself deflate. "I did, sir."
"Why?"
That was the kicker. Why? Give a good answer for this question and her problems might become less awful. "It's hard to turn you back on the past when it's staring you in the face, sir."
Nathaniel nodded, understanding. She had no doubt that if Ayani stepped through the portal tomorrow he would be in just as much of a quandary, and the pair of them knew it.
"I wouldn't ask you to do so, you do know that?" He asked.
She nodded, not trusting her voice. Throughout all this Miles stood impassive, leaning against the table as he watched the scene play out. Not daring to take part. Not daring to hope – or admit to hoping, she expected.
"Can you make a choice, Wash?" Nathaniel asked, and for the first time she saw a flash of emotion in his eyes, a plea.
"I'm not sure." She said. "I love you." She said directly to him.
"The way I see it, you have three options." Miles spoke for the first time. "Myself. My brother... or both."
Wash stared at him in silence for a long moment. "What?" Oh, very smooth.
"Am I right?" Miles asked Nathaniel.
Wash held her breath, wanting nothing more than his agreement. When he nodded slowly and turned to her, she allowed a faint smile to form. "You would do that?"
"I would."
She looked at Miles. "And you would accept that I love him?"
He inclined his head. "I would."
"Won't be easy." She said, advancing on them a few steps.
The brothers shared a look and laughed.
"Nothing ever is with you, Wash." Nathaniel said, reaching out for her.
She didn't hesitate.
##
Hands.
Of all the things she had ever expected from such a situation (not that it was a regular fantasy), the hands were not high on her list. She thought now that maybe she should have considered that list more carefully.
She knew what to do with another pair of hands. Could anticipate the motions, the destinations, the sensations they inspired.
Two pairs of hands? That was a another matter entirely.
Nathaniel's lips found her own and she groaned against them, digging her nails into his exposed biceps. His hands rested on her lower back, holding her steady – which didn't explain the additional sensation of fingertips of her stomach, rubbing gently against the material of her shirt.
The hand slipped lower, teasing over the button of her fly and rubbing over the skin under her waistband, before slipping down to cup her through the material of her pants. She fought the urge to grind shamelessly against it, even as another hand slipped up to squeeze her breast and run a finger over her tightening nipple.
"Not... here." She managed, voice breaking halfway through the sentence when one pair of lips latched onto her neck while another nibbled her opposite earlobe.
"Good a place as any, Wash." Came a gruff response – she had to think hard to identify it as Nathaniel through the haze of pleasure burning through her mind.
"Bed." She demanded, one hand coming to rest on the back of each attentive head against her will.
"She has a point, brother."
This voice was easily identifiable, if only by the barely-contained amusement as it was accompanied by a quick thrust against her ass. She gasped, grinding back against the insistent pressure until Miles too was breathing heavily, both of his hands heavy on her hips to hold her in place.
"Go to Wash's, I'll meet you there." Nathaniel said, stepping back and running a shaking hand through his hair.
"You sure?" She asked, catching his hand in both of hers even as Mile's thumb was still hooked through her belt loop.
"Two of us won't attract attention." He explained.
"Wouldn't do much good for the colonists to see their Commander all riled up." Miles whispered in her ear and she felt her lips quirk upwards in response.
She allowed him to lead her to the door, walking backwards all the way. Just as they were about to exit, she mouthed 'I love you' at Nathaniel, knowing that if he was allowed to stew over this without her around to reassure, he might back out. His face lit up and she nodded, ducking out of the door after his brother.
##
When Nathaniel arrived she had Miles pushed down on the couch, straddling his lap and grinding down into his hardness with abandon. She liked that he knew exactly what she needed without her having to verbalise it – a Taylor trait, she figured – and that rough was, for now, the order of the day. She lined her fingers up with the scars on his head and crushed their lips together as his hands held her ass to pull her ever closer.
She heard the footsteps behind her but didn't stop. This was all part of it, share and share alike. It was only when the feet stopped and she felt a hard hand surround her upper arm that she slowed her movements, giving Nathaniel enough of an opening to tug hard and pull her off of his brother. His arms wrapped around her and hoisted her up so that her legs were around his waist, swallowing her moan of pleasure at the feel of him pressed against her.
He started walking away from the couch and she whimpered, the sound enough to spur Miles out of his dazed stupor and into action, following them through her quarters to the bedroom. Nathaniel dumped her on the bed when they reached it and her outraged shout quickly turned into a moan when he stopped to pull his shirt over his head before returning his lips to her body.
He worked down her front, lips never lingering in one place for too long. When he reached her belt and started unfastening it quickly she grinned to herself in anticipation. It was at this point that Miles returned to her, pulling her tank over her head while his brother occupied himself lower. She tipped her head back with a silent groan when his mouth closed over her nipple through the material of her bra. At the same time Nathaniel pulled her pants down her legs and dropped them on the floor at the foot of them bed, running his fingers along the wet cotton of her underwear.
"Jesus." She muttered, the dual sensations driving her slowly insane.
Miles shifted his weight to one side of her as Nathaniel tugged her underwear down and off. While one brother concentrated on kissing her until she couldn't breathe, the other targeted her clit with his lips. Nathaniel sucked slightly in alarmingly good time with the rhythm of Mile's fingers over the skin of her torso and she grunted, hooking her leg over his shoulder and flexing her muscles to encourage him further. He thrust first one, then another finger into her, crooking them in such a manner that she had to tear her lips away from Miles to let out a needy moan.
Miles moved his mouth to her shoulder, unerringly locating the patch of sensitive skin that drove her wild when bitten and pressing his teeth into her skin at the same time as Nathaniel pulled her clit with his own teeth. She let out a triumphant cry as she broke apart at their hands, slumping hard against the pillows as shudders raced through her body.
They gave her little time to recover before resuming their adoration of her body; she had to forcibly reach down to pull Nathaniel up and meet his mouth with her own, tasting herself on his lips and tongue and revelling in the intoxicating power she felt as a result. He rolled onto his side and pulled her along with him as her hand wrapped around his length, fist moving up and down lazily as they kissed.
"Hate to interrupt." Miles drawled, kissing the back of her neck. "But do you have-."
"Top drawer, bedside cabinet." She said breathily and grit her teeth at the cold air that flooded against her back as he shifted to investigate her claim.
When he returned, he settled up behind her, his right hand a reassuring presence on her hip. "You done this before?"
She nodded, tucking her forehead against Nathaniel's neck. "Not at the same time as anything else."
"Learning curve for us all, then." Miles said, unstoppering the bottle and pouring a generous amount over the tips of his fingers.
Nathaniel brought his mouth to hers again as Miles started to prepare her, swallowing her responsive cries and whimpers. Both brothers took it slowly, easing the path for her as much as possible until she was almost able to forget about what exactly was occurring, despite the distantly familiar feelings Mile's fingers were evoking. Eventually she felt blunt pressure against her, signalling Miles thought she was ready.
"Say the word and I'll stop." He assured her and she permitted him with another nod of her head.
He moved slowly as he entered her, letting her adjust to every tiny thrust. She felt inordinately touched by his concern, appreciating his attempts to make this a pleasant experience for her. Nathaniel ran soothing hands up and down her sides as she bared her teeth against his collar bone, biting down when Miles lost control for a second and pushed harder than before. When he was buried to the hilt inside her he rested his chin on her shoulder and wrapped one arm around her waist to hold her firm.
Nathaniel took this as his cue to adjust his own weight and carefully thrust up into her, raising her leg up over his hip as he did so.
"Fuck." She groaned, laying her head back against Miles' shoulder. She almost couldn't bear it. "So full."
She felt both men smile against her skin, Miles against her shoulder and Nathaniel against her forehead.
"You have no idea." Nathaniel said, hand clutching hard at her thigh.
"Move." She commanded them after only a moment's stillness. "Please."
Miles complied first, slowly, his earlier preparations smoothing his withdrawal and subsequent thrust in. He fell into a slow rhythm without difficulty, turning his head to kiss along her jaw as she relaxed back into him. Nathaniel watched them move together with an expression of intense curiosity on his face, his eyes locked with hers. She could see the strain to remain still on his face.
"Please." She repeated, and when he still didn't move she squeezed her muscles around him, drawing a matching grunt from both men.
Nathaniel's free hand came to the back of her neck and pulled her close to him, joining their lips as he slid out and thrust back in, a perfect counterpoint to his brother's established rhythm. She gasped at the increasing feelings shockwaving their way through her entire being, as Nathaniel tugged her lower lip between his own and sucked, while the hand Miles had holding her waist slipped forward and into her slick folds.
She felt them work themselves into a thrust and retract pattern, simultaneously filling her to the brim and then leaving her achingly empty. The hands she had earlier focussed on to such a degree passed over every inch of her body until she lost track of which belonged to which brother. The experience was overwhelming, the pleasure growing and building to a level that she didn't think she'd ever reached before, or ever would again.
Fingers skimmed over her breasts, down her stomach to tweak her bundle of nerves, over her thighs to adjust the tilt of her hips and allow both men deeper. The trio grew wilder, thrusts becoming harder, Alicia's own hips moving back against the dual intrusion as she sought her illusive orgasm.
The men (her men) were close, she could tell. Their care for her was as strong as ever but their care with her was lessening, their hands harsher on her, lips giving way to teeth, hips rocking with abandon. She blindly sort a mouth to latch onto, the only indication that it was Miles she'd found being the lack of facial hair.
She couldn't tell which way was up but she could say with absolute certainty that, when the heel of a hand rubbed hard against her clit and she fractured around the pair of them, drawing them into oblivion with her, she was exactly where she was meant to be.
#
When she opened her eyes the next morning Miles was gone, apparently recognising that the moment of awakening was nothing something he had not yet earned the right to share. Sometime in the night she had snuggled closer to Nathaniel, her head resting on his chest. She tipped her head back to look up and find him staring down at her.
"Good morning." He said. It sounded like a question.
She stretched and felt a delightful ache through her body. She hoisted herself up and over him, thighs either side of his waist as her forearms braced on his upper chest. She kissed him lazily, tongue teasing over his own as neither fought for dominance. When the kiss broke she rested her chin on the back of her hand and smiled at him.
"Yes. It is." She quietly agreed.