The time that had passed lasted for an eternity, floating in an empty void of my own thoughts. My thoughts were usually the place I went for solitude, a place to escape from the world around me. But that was no longer an issue. Every time that I open my eyes I see her face, her chocolate brown eyes, and the scent that floats gently from her hair. But that was over now; Bella was gone, gone to Jacob and to never return. It's her destiny, if things like me or my family didn't exist than Bella would have ended up with Jacob; it was how it was supposed to go in the natural world.
The Natural world is where I should have died in 1917 of the Spanish Flu, never to meet such a beautiful girl, and ruin her life, complicating it. I am unnatural, a meeting of fairy tales, and the weight of it all is so great I wonder why, why we live like we do in fear of what we are, hiding our identities.
My mind is a tangled mess, too much to handle. A knock at the door interrupts my calm; I reach the field surrounding my mind and lightly touch the one right outside the door. The mind is familiar, belonging to my adoptive mother Esme. She edges the door and whispers, "Ed, I know you hear me, can I come in, we need to talk" I wave her in and she pushes the door open, leaving it ajar. I wish she had not done that.
She gracefully glides over and sits next to me the best she can on my sofa, cluttered with books. She looks in my eyes, I can hear that she is trying to hide something from me, but not well. We sit for a few moments, not wanting to be the one to bring up the subject that Esme is practically screaming in his face. "Ed, what are we really waiting on, you know, I know why you are like this." She takes my hand in some sort of comforting gesture, only making her thoughts slightly louder. "and we know how this problem should be solved"
I knew what she meant; it was time to move from forks. It is a good time. We have been here too long. This place just brings to many memories, of the past. But I had no intention of starting all over I just can't do that again. "I know, but I may need to leave you" I need to travel, I need to see things, I need to be alone, that is most important. I tell Her and the look in her eyes pains me, but I have grown to not take it as seriously. To completely ignore it instead.
She Smiles; I can see and hear the disappointment in her eyes, and mind. We have moved many times before, but this seems more difficult. I can't place my finger on it. It's weird I fell empty. Esme understands and lets herself out. She leave the door open and I can hear whispering downstairs, and creaks as Esme makes her way down the stairs, slow for some reason. I stand up and turn on my radio, blasting it so the only thing I can hear is the music entering one ear and exiting the other. I close my eyes and try to sleep, try to escape my thoughts, escape her face, and that smell that is burning my nostrils.
Jasper
I have been trying to see Edward for over two weeks now. Sure I know where he is, I have seen him. I have seen him physically, I know where he is now, but I want to talk to him. I want to talk to him one, on one. But every time I try he is gone, out hunting or who knows what else. I need to speak to him, I need to get this off my chest, I need to tell him myself.
I sit on our couch in the living room, tow things that we don't need, just a show to make us see just that much more normal. The TV blares and I do my best to ignore the bright ad scrolling across the screen. I breath out in attempt to calm myself, even I, the one who can change the emotions of those around him cannot calm himself down. The stress, the overwhelming truth that I need to scream is weighing down on my mind. Ed probably hears me, I know he can, my feelings are not something I can contain all the time. I struggle at all times to push and crush them down every moment of every day. Yet I let things by, and Ed barley looks in my direction.
I sense Alice sit next to me on the sofa. She grasps my hand and slowly caresses my thumb probably to grab my attention. I grunt to acknowledge that I know she is here. I sneak a glance at her, through the corner in my eye; she stares blankly at my cheek. It unnerves me to see her stare at me. I try and think of something besides us. She reaches and gently touches my cheek, I prevent myself from cringing at the strange roughness of her skin. Lately all I feel is a rough, cold skin when she touches me. I see cold dead eyes, instead of the warm welcoming eyes I saw before.
She whispers to me, "Jazz, what is wrong, you make me feel so anxious" I had barely noticed I was extending that to her and I withdrew the feeling back in. She focuses on a point on the opposite wall, she is having a vision. I can tell every time. But it has been while since I have seen it. My heart should be pounding, I should be sweating l, but that doesn't happen anymore, none of it does, we aren't normal, average humans. My mind is racing, wondering what she is seeing.