Hey Peeps, for once I actually own everybody in a fic…isn't that amazing?~!
This song was originally written to go into Professor Von Drakes' Extraordinary Time-Contraption-Thingy but unfortunately it didn't fit in anywhere into the story. I've modified it and re-worked it into a one-shot so that you don't miss out! Enjoy! x
This goes out to everybody who likes Villains better than Heroes!
All You Really Need Is An Evil Deed
Alcezar: Hi everybody, me and my buddy Thanatos here wanted to take a little time out to talk to you about how villains are always getting a bad rap, it's about time it stopped! Heroes whine and complain about how evil deeds ruin their lives but that is not the case!~!
The fiery godling next to Alcezar only rolls his eyes and sighs at his words.
Thanatos: Y'know AJ, your goin' about this all wrong, if you wanna win the readers over ya can't just drone on like your uncle Trivia your gonna have to show them a little showmanship..
Alcezar looks confused.
Thanatos {shakes his head}: Here, lemmie show ya.
As some upbeat music kicks in Thanatos pulls out a top hat that looks suspiciously like the one worn by Dr Facilier and a cane with a silver skull for a handle and begins bopping in time to the tune waiting for a cue.
Thanatos {singing in time to the music}: Now boys and girls gather round and listen if could, when I tell you every villain is a bit misunderstood.. Every hero has a damsel and every minion has their shtick..
Alcezar suddenly jumps in beside Thanatos and joins in..
Both {singing together}: But a villain needs an evil deed to really get a kick!
Alcezar and Thanatos both flash evil smirks before the fiery godling twirls his cane like a baton and the boys launch into chorus.
Both: An evil deed, an evil deed, what you really need is an evil deed… It's the only jolt that you really need, which means life's much better with an evil deed!
There's a very brief musical build up where Thanatos and Alcezar bop in sync to the tune.
Thanatos: Now your gettin' it AJ!
The fiery god indicates for Alcezar to take the lead and the demi-god sorcerer steps up into the spotlight.
Alcezar {singing}: When Disney villains take the hump-
Thanatos: They go assault their minions!
Alcezar {singing}: When stupid people need a thrill-
Thanatos: They all become heroes!
Alcezar {singing}: And when Almighty Zeus needs a rush-
Thanatos {grinning gesturing to himself}: He just chucks his bolts at me!
Alcezar {snaps his fingers}: Right!
Both boys turn back to back leaning on each other.
Both {singing}: But the only thing that makes us leer is a freakin' evil deed!
They spring apart and start bopping to the chorus.
Both: An evil deed, an evil deed, what you really need is an evil deed… It's the spice of life that you really need, so life's worth living with an evil deed!
Thanatos tips his top hat while leaning on his cane and smirks at Alcezar.
Thanatos: Take it AJ!
Alcezar unfurls a scroll and reads aloud
Alcezar {singing}: It's like the Code of Villainy states: Minions are your tool!
Thanatos barges in front of Alcezar glaring and flaring nastily
Thanatos {singing}: Or like our dear Maleficent says: Shut up you insufferable fool!
Alcezar {singing while waggling a finger at the reader}: So try and use your head and don't buy into all this fear-
Both boys grin widely at each otherand spread their arms widely
Both {singing together}: When we start to plot an evil deed you should stand and friggin' cheer!
Both: An evil deed, an evil deed, what you really need is an evil deed… When heroes fight they must agree, that all we really need is an evil deed!
As the music slowly builds up Thanatos turns to Alcezar
Thanatos {gesturing to the reader}: You think these guys get the message yet?
Alcezar {sighs}: I frickin' hope so Than, I don't think we can make this any clearer, do you?
Thanatos {shakes head}: Nah, let's just move on to the instrumental.
As the music instrumental strikes up Thanatos twirls on the spot and does some fancy footwork while twirling his cane. He then performs an aerial black flip over Alcezar and landing squarely on his feet with his arms outstretched, top hat in the left hand and grinning widely.
Alcezar scowls at the godling's showing off before launching into his own complicated footwork. He then follows through with a forward flip, landing on his feet facing Thanatos and sending a jolt of electricity from his finger in the god's direction.
Thanatos doges this easily but glares as the music builds again for the second part of the instrumental. The fiery god places the top hat on his head once more and spins it around to that the skull is facing the front. His golden eyes are cast into deeper shadow as they narrow at the demi-god sorcerer.
Thanatos summons a golden-flamed fireball and tosses it at Alcezar.
Alcezar leaps out of the way and shoots another bolt of electricity as Thanatos leans backwards and swivels around on the balls of his feet to avoid it, straightening neatly once the jolt has passed.
Thanatos smirks widely and flings another fireball which narrowly misses Alcezar as he dives away. The demi-god sorcerer then shoots a bolt of electricity hitting the top hat on Thanatos' head knocking it clean off.
The fiery god sighs before picking the hat up and placing it on his head once more causing Alcezar to snicker as the top of the hat is now punched out making it look like an open tin can. Thanatos' golden eyes look upwards to it and he too starts snickering amused.
As the music prepares to launch into the final chorus Thanatos walks forward grinning at Alcezar and helps him up to his feet.
Both boys grin widely as they march on the spot.
Both {chanting}: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight… It's the end of the song so we'll simply state!
Alcezar and Thanatos nod and bop to the music once more.
Both {singing}: An evil deed, an evil deed, what you really need is an evil deed… It's the only thing that you really need, what you really need is an evil deed!
Thanatos and Alcezar are back-to-back and share one last glance before turning to the reader as the music played it's last bars.
Both {scowling and pointing at the reader}: So don't bad-mouth us villains please!