Hetalialight

Once upon a time there lived a totally hot blonde guy in a forest in the middle of nowhere between real cities and fake ones together with his dad and stuff. Anyway, this totally hot guy had a brunette friend who moved in with his dad in a cottage. Oh bye the way, the blonde guy was named Jacob and the brunette's name was Bella. The blonde hotty had a crush on Bella but he was too shy to ask her out and sometimes he came with really awkward pick up lines. Toris, I mean Bella was really cute and kind towards everyone but people usually stepped on her, not litterally though, and asked her to do stuff. She had a lot of friends, one of them was a sparkling guy with glasses named Edward.

"Wait wait wait, Feliks, is this seriously your own story?"
"Don't you like it? This is totally original."

"Do you wanna hear the rest Eduard?"
"Why not..."

Edward was a blood drinking fairy who lost his wings in some randome battle against evil unicorn fairies in the cold kingdom were they drink vodka.

"Unicorn fairies?"
"Yes, unicorn fairies."

Jacob was a different kind of creature who could transform into a beutiful pink pony with rainbow powers. The magical ponies and the fairies didn't like each other very much and that's why Jacob and Edward didn't really get along, plus the fact that Jacob knew that the fairy wanted Bella. So our brave and handsome hottie tried to destroy their friendship and walked to the evil unicorn fairies leader and like told him that Edward did the greatest taboo of all.

"Being in love with a human?"
"What? Nooo, he told Russia, I mean the fairie unicorn that Edward had been wandering around in ponie territory. Why would Ru...I mean the fairie unicorn leader care about such a thing?"
"You have a point there."

Edward and his family didn't know anything about this of course and they played baseball together with Bella. Latvia, I mean Alice had a vision and a headache because Edward couldn't really swing the bat so the ball hit her head. Alice then told them that the leader of the unicorn fairires were on their way to capture Edward. For some reason she couldn't know all the details even though she could see the future.
Suddenly out of the blue in a blue cloud came three fairies and laughed at their poor attempt to play baseball. One of them had lucious golden hair and had a french accent, another held a hamburger in his hand and the leader had thick eyebrows. Edward's family couldn't stand the insult and they all forgot about the threat of the unicorn fairie. So they like had two teams and started a very dramatic baseballgame. It started to rain for some weird reason and there was thunder but the fairies didn't really care.
After a while Edward accidently hit Bella in the head with his bat and the game ended, the other team like won.

"How come Edward is so clumsy?"
"He like forgot his glasses."
"Why do I even ask...oh well, what happened next?"

The three fairires poffed away while laughing. Edward carried his precious Bella and apologised several times but Bella just smiled and like said it didn't matter. Then there was a thunderstorm which made it impossible for Edward to drive her home. In that time came like a fairie mail.

"Fairie mail?"
"Yeah."
"What's that?"
"A mail from a fairie, duh."

Edward sat in front of his beloved computer and received this mail which had a photo of the hottie blonde guy tied up. It was kind of an angry message which said that Edward would be beaten up if he continued with breaking the taboo. Then it was a knock on the door.

"Wait...why did he tie up the hott...Jacob?"
"He's a sadist?"
Feliks shrugged and continued the story.

But the knocking transformed into scary scratching while a female voice used a scary tone.
"Let me iiin, let me iiin, brother will punish you and I will punish you and become his bride."
This scared the shit of Edward, his sister and Bella. They ran around in the house panicking. The door was then kicked in by the leader of the unicorn fairies who was like creepy smiling towards them. He was just going to punch Edward for the forbidden trespassing when Bella stood in the way with her arms like dramatically and shouted at him to stop. Then she held a speach about equals, flowers and birds and such...not really. But she pledge to him that Edward never did any harm. She didn't realise that the evil unicorn fairie didn't really cared if Edward like was bad or not, he just liked to mess around with them.

"Feliks, why did you make Edward to such a coward?"
"Well, it just like happened."

Edward then implied that the rules about the forbidden trespassing was stupid and like told him that they should change the rules. The leader of the unicorn fairies thought about it and then told Edward he could make an exception if the hottie blonde guy Jacob and Bella married each other.

"What?! That doesn't make any sense at all!"
"Jacob and Bella then lived happily after, the end! What do you think?"

"Did you like, like my story?"
"Why couldn't Edward marry Bella instead?"
"Well the leader of the unicorn fairies is a sadist."
Eduard blinked and looked after the blonde who skipped away. He looked at the computer where Feliks had written down his story. For a while he hesitated before he continued.

THE END