Alrighty guys! Here's an Envy fic for ya'll! This is really sad, just as a warning.

Warnings: AU, OOC, Self-Harm, Bullying, discrimination, violence, language, and minor suggestive content.

NOT A YAOI!

Italics-flashback

Bold-Envy's writing

Normal-Present

Underlined-texts

Envy's POV

"Freak!" he yelled at me. He walked out of the locker room. I tried going after him, I wanted to hit him so bad, but one of his friends grabbed me and threw me down. I sat up and watched them leave, tears threatening to fall when I saw they were laughing at me.

I can't believe what happened today. I don't think I can ever show my face in school again. Why did I have to be cursed with this birth defect?

What happened, was I was in the boys locker room, showering after gym class. Usually I'm able to hide such a birth defect, but I slipped and fell down, exposing my long-kept secret.

Being androgynous really sucks. I don't know how it happened, my parents don't know…not even the doctors know. I'm just the one in every one thousand kids that are born like that. Why me? Why did I have to be born like this? I can't afford the surgery to get it changed. Why didn't god, if there is one out there, choose some rich kid? But no...it was me and I have to go through all the shit at school because of what I simply am. Everybody was talking about it by the end of the day.

I walked over to the table I normally sat at in lunch. I was shaking from anger, hurt, and fear. I hadn't seen any of my friends all day. What would they think, now that my secret was out?

I sat down next to Ed, like normally. He was my best friend. Surely he wouldn't judge me, right?

Greed looked at me and smirked. I knew what he was thinking. I just hoped he wouldn't-

"Hey, Envy. I heard what happened earlier. Pretty creepy, right? I'm not trying to be rude, but it's pretty weird!" he said, smiling.

Yep, of course fate hates me.

Ed cast Greed a glare but didn't say anything. I don't think there was anything else to say. Just that simple comment made me know my friends thought lower of me.

I can't believe Greed had to make a comment about it in front of all of my friends. I mean, yeah, he gives me a hard time about various things, but I didn't think even he could be that cruel. I feel so horrible and rejected for who I am. All day, I got stares, smug grins, and saw people whispering to each other. I knew it wasn't every-day conversation. They all had to get their hands dirty with the new piece of gossip. I hate people…this is why I never really socialized with people.

In fact, I wouldn't have any friends if Ed didn't strike up conversation with me back in 9th grade. I didn't talk to anybody at school unless I had to, until he came around. After Ed befriended me, he introduced me to his other friends, and I was finally in a group of people who actually liked me. I was so happy, but now they may leave me. Roy already has.

I sat down next to Roy in Chemistry class as usual. We decided we'd be lab partners in the beginning of the year. He was always so nice, too. When I sat, he tapped my shoulder. I looked over at him.

"Hey Envy, ah, I think I'm going to sit with Jean today. Riza is absent and he asked me to be partners for the experiment today. You mind?" I opened my mouth to object, but he cut me off. "Great, thanks," he said and got up, walking to sit next to Jean Havoc.

Not only was I hurt that he just up and left like that, but I was shocked that he would leave me on a lab day. He could have just invited Jean to work with us. I huffed and pulled out my cellphone, starting a conversation over text with Roy.

'Hey, why didn't you just invite him to join us?'

I waited only 2 minutes for his reply.

'Look, Envy…I don't think we should sit together anymore. I mean, I prefer guy-friends. Girls to me are just, there to date, ya know? It's confusing being around you. You're smart, you'll get through today. Riza will probably be your lab partner, just ask when she gets better.'

I felt tears welling up. They weren't only from hurt. I was angry. I was angry at Roy, and Greed, and everyone! I just wanted to disappear, so I did. I asked to go to the bathroom and just cut the rest of the class period.

Damn it! Damn it all to Hell! It's going to get worse, I know it is! I already knew my father saw me as strange. My mother is kind of a crazy bitch, but she does her best to understand me. Little Wrath doesn't mind, and Lust is nice about it, but I don't think she likes being related to me. Still, even with family support, it's not enough. I really am playing with the idea of going anti-social again. It's only Junior year, I can get through a year and a half with no socializing. Jeez, I went nine years without socializing before.

Heh, well this is weird. Welcome To My Life by Simple Plan just came onto my radio. Seems fate really does want to destroy me.

I hate irony. I really do. Even after being pushed around in the morning, I ended up with an even worse temper than I had before.

I was walking to my locker between 7th and 8th period to get my English book. When I saw who was at my locker, I tried to turn and leave, but he already saw me. The guy from the locker room, Eric, was leaning against my locker. He opened his big mouth and let out a comment.

"Hey, Envy! I have a question for you! Are you gay or lesbian? Or does that even count for people like you?" He laughed along with his friends. Yeah. Real fucking funny.

"You know what, Eric? I don't have to answer, and you shouldn't be asking." I pushed him aside and began opening the lock. But Eric had other plans.

"Well looks like the little bitch is in a bad mood. On your period?" he teased and grabbed my arm, pulling me away from the locker. I glared at him as I dropped my books.

"What does it matter? Disappointed that you can't get a good fuck?" I shot back. Fight fire with fire, the rule I always lived by.

"Uhg, gross! Hear that?! He thinks he'd be a good fuck! Someone is more confident than I thought." He shoved me. That was IT!

I totally lost it. All the pent up anger came out in one punch to his nose. Once I had started, I couldn't stop. I kept swinging at him, fighting back tears of anger and hurt. But Eric is a lot stronger than me, being on the wrestling team and all. He soon had me against the lockers and was hitting me, over and over again. I couldn't move, because I was trying to regain my breath after his kick to my solar plexus.

I heard yelling and next thing I knew, he was being pulled off by a teacher and we were forced down to the principal's office.

I ended up getting suspended. He did too, but he got suspended on a normal basis. This was the first time I got in this much trouble at school. Everything I had ever done wrong only ever got me a detention or two. Of course my parents know, and they are beyond disappointed. I'm grounded and got my computer taken away. It doesn't matter, anyway. It's not like I'm going out, and I have no desire to see what people are saying about me.

I don't know what to do with myself. I want to end it, but I don't want to die. I just don't know how I'll handle it…since I'm suspended, I can just sleep the days away, I guess. I just hope I don't really lose my mind.

But maybe that may be best.

I sighed and sat my pen down, closing my notebook. It felt good getting that out, but now what? It's only 8:00pm. It'd be ridiculous to go to sleep. I stood up and went to the bathroom, I had to pee.

After I had finished that, I just stood, looking in the mirror. I eyed my feminine features with disgust. How hadn't anybody noticed before? My face really is very feminine. I felt a pang in my chest and lashed out, punching and breaking the mirror. I grunted when I felt the glass cut my hand and arm. I pulled the glass out of one of my deeper wounds and just stared dumbly at the blood.

It didn't even hurt.

I turned the glass over in my hands, toying with the idea of self-harm. It barely hurt, so maybe if I could make it hurt…

No, that was stupid…I couldn't…could I?

I placed the edge an inch above the first cut and slid it across. This time, I could feel it, and I groaned in pain.

"Envy?!"

The exclamation made me gasp and drop the shard. I looked over at the door to see Ed standing there, looking shocked.

"Ed, I-…how did you get in here?"

"Wrath let me in, but what the Hell are you doing?!" he yelled and walked over to me, grabbing me by my shirt. "What the FUCK were you just doing?!"

"I…Ed, I swear only the one was on purpo-"

"Doesn't matter! Envy, are you really that upset?" His anger changed to sympathy so fast I got a mental whiplash.

I didn't say anything and looked away, feeling ashamed. I guess from his end, it did look over-dramatic. But he forced me to look at him. "Envy, is this about what happened today?"

I averted my eyes and nodded. "Ed, I don't think you understand how much it hurts."

"I know I don't understand, but that doesn't mean I'm not your friend."

I looked at him in surprise. "Wait…you're not disgusted?"

He shook his head. "Of course I'm not. If I was, I wouldn't be here saving your dumb ass right now."

"But the others-"

"If they're leaving you behind, then they're stupid. Envy, you are unique and rare. That makes you a treasure, not trash. If anybody is trash, it's the people who are low enough to hate you for it," he said, smiling at me. "You're like a brother to me, and that isn't changing anytime soon."

I could feel myself starting to cry. Damn these girl hormones… Ed gave me a hug. "Envy, just don't worry." He then stood up and got out the first aid kit and cleaning my wounds. I just sat there on the floor, trying to stop myself from crying.

It felt good to get it out, and I was also happy that someone still cared. Before I knew it, Ed had put the first aid kit away and carried me out of the room. He set me down in the middle of the room and I walked over to the bed, sitting down.

"Hey Ed…I'll be okay tonight. Go home so you can go to school tomorrow, all right?" I said.

"Sure thing Envy. You get some sleep too, I'll try and stop by again tomorrow," he said and clapped me on the back before leaving.

I laid down on the bed and wrapped myself in the covers, falling asleep peacefully for the first time in a long time. Ed lifted a burden off of me, despite the haters I had received. Now I could be at peace.

*Wipes a tear away* I hope you guys liked! Or, thought it was good..sorry if I made you sad! Please Review!