I have an excuse this time. I was in the car for two hours with no acess to Silver Key, so I wrote this. :D
I tried to use a different style with this but . . .
I think I failed at it. D:
P.S. SephCloud equals new shonen-ai OTP.
P.P.S. You do NOT want to know how much formatting trouble this thing gave me when I tried to edit it in a FFN doc. -.-;;
Just A Memory
So strong, yet so easily broken, thought the green-eyed man(was he a man, or a monster?), as he watched the blue-eyed(or were his eyes mako-green as well?) boy struggle to rise. So pretty when in pain. So . . . beautiful.
It would feel so good to break him(break him, break him, watch him shatter). To see tears spill from his crystalline eyes(clear liquid from sky-blue, like rain). To see him writhe and twist in pain(so very pretty in pain). To hear him scream(scream, scream his heart out) in that broken, desolate way of his.
But somehow, he felt that he couldn't. He felt that if he hurt the boy, what little remained of his heart would crack and break, falling into darkness(darkness had consumed him so, so long ago) as nothing more than shattered shards. Perhaps it was because of the feelings he used to have, for a boy(a boy who had hurt him, had broken him) who used to love him. Those feelings he had torn apart and thrown away long ago, and yet they still lingered, telling him that it was wrong to hurt the boy(but he was, oh, so pretty when he was in pain), telling him that if he cried(cried those beautiful, beautiful tears) he should run to him and hold him close, comfort him and dry his tears. They told him that if he screamed, he should rip apart(like the boy had ripped apart his heart) whatever it was that was frightening him, to protect him from harm. They told him he could not hurt the boy(but he wanted to hurt him, so badly) without hurting himself.
So you see, he really couldn't hurt the boy(so pretty in pain). Could he? He looked down at the boy(so pretty), who had now gotten to his feet and was preparing to attack(silly boy, you can't hurt me).
Maybe he could. It hurt(hurt, hurt so much), but he could still push aside his tattered emotions for long enough to inflict pain(pretty, pretty) on the boy.
He lashed out, throwing the boy back against a wall, then ran the Masamune through his shoulder(does it hurt now, Cloud?), fully expecting him to scream and break into tears like he always did(you always were weak, Cloud).
He didn't.
He didn't cry out; his eyes didn't even widen. Instead, they narrowed, as he glared at the green-eyed man with defiance completely foreign to the ex-General.
Shock(but was it really so shocking, after what he did?) rippled through him, though he took care not to show it. This was not the boy(the pretty, pretty boy) he knew. The boy he knew was small, quiet, shy, and submissive. He would never(never, never ever) stand up to the ex-General like this. And he most certainly would not have taken that blow(why, why didn't it hurt him?) the way he did. The boy he knew would have cried out upon impact, then frantically try to pull the blade out, cutting his hands to ribbons in the process, while tears he couldn't hold back(those were the prettiest kind) spilled from his eyes.
This boy's– no, this man's reaction could not differ more from that. He didn't understand it(why, why is this happening?). Could the blonde, blue-eyed boy who used to love him have really changed that much? The thought almost made the ex-General's heart stop.
No! He refused to believe it. Cloud could not have changed(he wouldn't allow him to change!). Cloud was Cloud, no one else. He was still that shy, quiet, beautiful boy(that boy who had cared more than anyone else ever had) he remembered. He had merely learned to hide his emotions, as Sephiroth himself had. All he had to do was pull apart his barriers, and then the boy would break, oh, so beautifully! But perhaps violence was not the answer. He had seen the boy stand up to that(but how, how did he stand up to him like that?), but he was sure that an attack on his mental state would have far more effect. He smirked down at the boy, matching the heated glare with a cool one of his own.
"Tell me, Cloud. What do you cherish most? Give me the pleasure of taking it away." (I'll take it all away from you, all of it)
He expected him to freeze, then stumble over his words(you never could speak your mind, could you, Cloud?) as he frantically tried to find a way out of this situation, just like he had when Sephiroth asked him if he loved him(and you said you did, Cloud, but that was a lie, wasn't it?), all those years ago.
He didn't.
Instead, he glared more fiercely at the ex-General and grabbed the blade of the Masamune, pulling it out and stabbing it into the wall behind him(where did this strength come from?!). Sephiroth had to let go of the sword and leap backwards several feet, or risk being decapitated by the sword Cloud was now wielding.
"I pity you. You just don't get it all."
(Don't I, Cloud?)
"There's not a thing I don't cherish!"
(What?!)
Sephiroth watched as Cloud leapt off the building, slightly stunned at this declaration. The Cloud he knew would never have said something like that. The Cloud he knew would not have stood up to him like that. The Cloud he knew would never do anything this man was doing.
And then, he finally understood.
Cloud was no longer that blue-eyed boy with the bright smile(it was like the sun, so beautiful and bright) and pretty laugh(it was musical and happy, never forced, always light), no longer that person who had broken through Sephiroth's barriers and made him smile(you always could make me smile, Cloud). He was something entirely different, something Sephiroth knew nothing about(what are you?!). And somehow he knew that the blue-eyed boy he used to know, wasn't coming back. Somewhere inside him, something broke(the remains of a heart, shattered into a million pieces) and he hardly noticed the Omnislash until it hit him.
(You really aren't Cloud anymore, are you?)
Cloud stared up at the One-Winged Angel with eyes that were no longer blue(pretty, pretty blue, like the sky), but mako-green(that ugly, horrible, mako-green). "Stay where you belong. In my memories."
The ex-General met Cloud's gaze evenly. "I will never become a memory." (Not like you did, Cloud)
He folded his one black wing around him and allowed Kadaj to come out again, while he retreated back into his memories of a blue-eyed boy who could always make him smile.
Because that's all Cloud really was anymore. He was just a memory now.
(Just a memory)