************************
Can't I Just Be Lonely?
by Leiliana
Rated: PG-13
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She stuck her hands in her heavy coat's
pockets. Nothing seemed to be going right
that day. First, she failed her English
quiz, and then she got a 2 hour detention
for not having homework for Algebra. She
felt like crying. 'Nothing good is ever
going to happen to me,' she thought.
She swallowed the lump in her throat and
mentally told herself not to cry.


"USAGI-CHAN!!" yelled a familiar voice. She
turned and saw one of her best friends, Ami,
running towards her. She smiled half-heartedly
at Ami. Ami always seemed to be in a good
mood, no matter what. On top of that, she was
a straight-A student and was always at the
top of her class.


"Usagi-chan?" A hand waved in front of Usagi's
face, and she immediately returned to the
real world and focused her eyes on Ami.
"Daijabou?" Ami asked.


Usagi shook her head.


"What's wrong?" Ami guided her to the nearest
bench and sat down. She collapsed on the
bench and covered her head in her hands.


"Everything." Usagi whispered. "Everything
is going wrong all at the same time." She
looked up to Ami's worried blue eyes. Can't
I just be lonely for once? Not have my
grades on top of it?" Usagi sighed. "You
know that English quiz I studied for with
you last night?" She looked down at the
pavement and closed her eyes.


"Did you fail it?" Ami asked, rubbing
her back.


"Hai." Usagi felt the tears leak out of her
closed eyelids. "I tried, but everything
was like a blur. I had to hand it in and
I never finished it. I can't believe it."


"Can't believe what, Odango Atama?" a deep
voice rumbled from the right of Usagi. "That
you can't go two feet without stumbling?" He
chuckled at his own joke.


But of course, no one laughed but him. Usagi
picked her head up and opened her eyes. 'Of
course, it just HAS to be him,' she thought.
'That arrogant, stuck-up, handsome hunk named
Mamoru... Hey, wait. Wrong tangent there,
Usagi.' She stood up and didn't even bother
to wipe the tears from her eyes. Usagi streched
her full 5 foot frame as tall as she could
and faced Mamoru. She looked deep into his
eyes and she noticed that he had an alarmed
look on his face. 'He probably noticed that
I'm crying,' she noted.


"Mamoru-baka, I am seriously not in the mood
for an argument right now." Usagi turned back to
Ami. She felt a warm hand encircle her wrist.


"Usagi-san..." His voice sounded sympathetic.


"What?" Usagi said bitterly, turning around
to face him again. She noticed the bit of
emotion in his eyes. But she didn't care.
"You gonna dish out another insult to me?
Well, I am not in the mood. Or did you not
hear me the first time? LEAVE ME ALONE!" She
ripped her wrist out of his grasp. She looked
back up into his eyes. They had returned to
the steel blue that she was so very used to
seeing. "I'll see you around, Chiba-san."


Usagi turned back towards Ami and noticed
that her eyes were wide with surprise. She
felt embarressed. She had blown up at the
one person she shouldn't have. Usagi turned
around to apologize to Mamoru, but he was
already down the street. She choked back a
sob, and turned around and fled, ignoring
Ami's protests.


She ran until she couldn't anymore. Everything
was wrong, her grades at school, her behavior,
even the relationship she had with the one guy
she actually liked, truly. She stopped near
the big oak tree in Juuban Park, near the lake.
She sat down and leaned back against the massive
trunk. She watched the sun set slowly. The ice
on the lake reflected the light beautifully,
making it twice as breathtaking. She hugged
herself, wishing that she had someone special
to hold. 'Of course,' she thought, 'I just blew
it all away.'


She opened her eyes and stood up. "I've got
to go home," she murmured to herself. She
gathered up her things and started for home.



*************************



"...and she just said 'See you later, Chiba-san'
to me! Can you believe it?" Mamoru said amidst
the bustle of the arcade. He was following
Motoki as he was doing his rounds of the tables
with a laden tray.


"Well," Motoki started, plopping a plate of
fries on a table, "You pissed her off! Whaddya
expect? Here you go," he dropped off a milk
shake in the middle of a couple's table.


"But I don't get it! She is used to me saying
stuff like that." Mamoru stopped and sat down
at his usual stool at the counter. Motoki
opened the divider and slid the empty tray
onto the counter.


"Well, maybe she had a bad day." Motoki shrugged
and leaned against the counter. "And you were
the last straw."


Mamoru's eyebrows furrowed in thought. "Yeah,
maybe. I'll tell her that I'm sorry tommorrow."
He turned the stool towards the aisle and moved
to leave. He was almost to the sliding doors
when Motoki yelled at him.


"Hey Mamoru-kun, why don't you just go now? You
know where she lives right?" Motoki yelled to
Mamoru at the door. He saw Mamoru stop and noticed
that his head fell a little in embarressment. But
he didn't turn to the left towards his apartment,
he turned to the right. "Huh, figures. He goes
off and gets the girl while I have to work my
butt off in here." He turned back to the kitchen
and pinned an order to the rack, shaking his
head in amusment.



*************************




Usagi burst through the door in anger. All
that walking home had built up her anger at
herself. "Hello?" she yelled to the empty
house. "Anybody home?" She got no reply.
She sighed tiredly and trudged up the stairs.
She heard the bleepings of a video game
being played coming from Shingo's room. She
opened the door. "Konban wa, Shingo-baka."


He turned his head slightly towards the
voice and said "You're late. Ikuko-mama
left to go get groceries about half an
hour ago. She told me she'd be back in
two hours." He focused back on the game,
mumbling something about a 'stupid youma'
to himself.

"Arigato, Shingo." Usagi shut the door
quietly so she wouldn't disturb her brother.
She sighed and walked a little ways down
the hall and opened her door.

She shrugged off her coat and let it fall
to the floor, along with her book bag.
She briefly turned on the radio, but the
blaring car commercial made her turn it
back off. She walked over to her window and
sat in her desk chair. She put her elbow
on the window sill and rested her chin
in her palm. She watched the full moon rise
and almost felt the light carress her
face. 'I hope we find the princess soon,'
she wished, looking at the moon. 'The
attacks are getting more and more frequent.'

"Usagi-chan, what are you doing? Daydreaming
again?" Luna's voice brought her out of
her reverie.

"Yup, that's me. Always daydreaming." She
faked a small smile and turned back to
the window. "Honestly, can't I just be
reflecting on life or something important
like that? Or am I really that much of a
flake that I can't think?" Usagi turned in
the chair and looked Luna in the eye.

Luna's mouth opened, but she shut it
quickly. "Gomen, Usagi. I'll just let
you think alone, then." Luna turned around
and started to walk out the door.

"Wait, Luna. I'm sorry for snapping at
you. I'm just frustrated, you know?" Usagi
got up from the chair and walked over to
Luna. She leaned over and picked the black
mooncat. "I snapped at Mamoru today and
I feel terrible about it. I'm sorry, I'm
taking my anger out on you."

Luna nodded. "I totally understand. It's
hard trying to hide your emotions from
someone you love."

Tears welled up in Usagi's eyes. "Hai,
it is." She plopped Luna on the bed and
walked back over to the window. She
continued to watch the moon, secretly
hoping that Mamoru wasn't mad at her.



*************************



Of course, he was the exact opposite. He
himself was wondering if he should be
mad at himself at the moment. He continued
to walk to Usagi's house to apologize to
her. He looked up at the moon and noted
it's beauty. 'Like Usako...' he thought.
He turned a corner and the streetlight
went on as he passed. He looked up at
the third house on the street and saw
an angel in the window. HIS angel, Usagi.

Mamoru stopped walking and let himself
get lost in thought. 'If only we had met
on better terms, this would all be
different.' He saw her get up in a hurry,
and wondered what would be wrong. He
went under her other window, to see if she
went to that one. What he saw was something
he never expected to see at the Tsukino
residence.



*************************


A sharp beeping filled Usagi's room. Sighing,
she got up in a flash and turned on her
communicator. "Moon here."

"Moon, we need serious help with an ugly
one at Juuban Park, (AN: so typical, isn't
it?) and soon." Jupiter panted on the
other side.

"I'm there!" Usagi clicked off the comm and
took out her transformation broach. "Moon
Power Make UP!" She shouted. She let the
energy envelop her completely. Soon she
was the pretty soldier Sailor Moon. She
shivered on the onslaught of energy. It was
better than any cold shower.

"Mom, I'm going to bed!!" Usagi yelled, opening
the window and sliding out.

"Usa-baka..." Shingo started and saw the open
window and two hands on the sill.

"Great, now how am I supposed to get down?" Sailor
Moon muttered to herself.

Shingo leaned over the edge of the window, and
stared at Sailor Moon. "Us- Usagi?"

"Shingo-baka, not now! I have to go dust a
youma!!" Sailor Moon yelled at him.

"Us-Usagi?!? KAMI-SAMA!! USAGI IS SAIL-"

"SHINGO LEAVE ME ALONE AND GET OUT OF MY
ROOM RIGHT NOW!!" Sailor Moon yelled at her
brother. "AND I mean it! Or you get dusted."

"Yessum." Shingo saluted to the hands on
the sill and fled out of the room.

Sailor Moon (Usagi) sighed. "That baka." She
jumped down and landed in a crouching position.
She turned around and moved to run when she
came in contact with a strong muscled chest
with a green jacket buttoned over it. 'Wait
a sec, a green jacket??' Usagi looked up and
met the eyes of her enemy slash crush, Chiba
Mamoru. He smiled.

Usagi, in Sailor Moon form, screamed and began
to rant. "Nu-uh, you are an illusion. Where
are the other senshi? MAKO-CHAN! AMI-CHAN!!
What's going on?"

"Sailor Moon, or should I say Usagi, I'm not
exactly an illusion." Mamoru took a rose out
of his hideous green jacket, and smirked. "Maybe
my secret should be known too."

Usagi gasped as Chiba Mamoru slowly became
Tuxedo Kamen. "Tu-Tu-Tu-"

"That's right." He grabbed Usagi's hand and
tried to ignore the electricity that passed
through his hand. He glanced at Sailor Moon's
face and saw that he wasn't the only one to
feel it. Tuxedo Kamen suddenly pulled her
into his arms.

Sailor Moon's eyes widened. "Mamoru.."

Tuxedo Kamen stroked her cheek. "Kami, you
are so beautiful..." He leaned in to kiss
her, and watched as she reached up to
meet his lips. When they were millimeters
away...

Screaming interuptted their private moment.

"Kuso! Come on, Sailor Moon! People need
your help!" Tuxedo Kamen started running
and pulled Sailor Moon along with him.



*************************


Sailor Moon let Tuxedo Kamen pull her to
the fight. Besides, it was what she
had always wanted. Holding her hero's hand
and running away from- well, in this case, to-
a fight scene. A warmth spread through her,
warming the tips of her freezing fingers
and even her toes. She felt safe with him
holding her hand. Even if she was still
scared about the fight. When he was near
her, anything could be done, even if a
youma was involved. Gripping Tuxedo Kamen's
hand tighter, she continued to run with
him.



*************************



"Mars Fire IGNITE!" shouted a frazzled Mars. She
glanced around after the attack hit the ugly
youma. Her eyes scanned the area for any sign
of Sailor Moon. "SHIMATTA! Where is the baka?"

"Oh, Mars, calm down." Jupiter ducked the creature's
tentacles. "She'll be here. Don't worry."

"Yes, but this thing is not weakening fast enough
for her to defeat it with the wand," a worried
Mercury stated, still calculating on her computer.
"It is weakening at a very slow rate, even though
we are hitting it with everything we've got."

"Well, maybe if Moon-baka was here, we'd be able
to go HOME!" Mars yelled, stomping the ground
with her foot.

"Oh, Mars, don't throw a hissy fit!" announced a new
voice. "Never fear, Venus is here!" Venus gave
Mars a 'V for Victory' sign and a huge smile.

Mars turned to Venus. "YOU! Don't get me STARTED
with you. You are late too!"

"I'm late, minna?" Sailor Moon said, entering the
scene. "Gee, who da thunk it?"

"Moon! Dust this thing!" Mercury yelled, looking up
from her calculations. "He's weakened enough!"

"Right!" Sailor Moon took out her moon wand and
yelled out "Moon Healing Power!" She let her
hands fall slowly as the youma turned back
into a person.

"Usa..." a voice behind said. Sailor Moon turned
arounda and was faced with Tuxedo Kamen.

"Hey, this is a first you guys. The great
Tuxedo Kamen is here after a fight!!" shouted
one of the girls. Both Moon and Kamen turned
and glared at the giggling group. They
stopped immediately.

"Minna, could you perhaps... leave?" Moon
growled at them.

Jupiter's face was grave. "Sailor Moon, you
don't even know who he is. And how can
we trust him?"

Sailor Moon glanced at Kamen's face. It
was a mask of hurt. "Mamo- I mean, Tuxedo
Kamen, that's not true. I've always
trusted you." She walked up to him,
and stroked his cheek. "You believe me,
right?"

Kamen smiled. "Hai, I believe you."

Four surprised and alarmed gasps came
from the Senshi's direction. (AN: Terras,
remember? No, OOOOAHHHHHHOOOO! As in surprised
and alarmed. Oh, you mean AAAAHHHHH! Yes,
AHHHHHHHHHH! * Leili giggles insanely*)

"Wait a sec, I'm extremely confused here,
minna." Mars said, sitting down with a
thud on the hard packed soil. "What is
happening?"

Venus sighed. "It seems like they finally
realized that they love each other. It just
took me to get them there."

Moon slapped her forehead. "Venus-chan,
you did nothing." She blushed, and glanced
sideways at Kamen. "But I have to admit...
I do love him."

"REally?!?" Kamen said, his mouth open. Moon
snapped it shut.

"Yes, really." Moon squeeked in alarm as
she was enveloped in a hug.

"I love you too." Kamen whispered huskily
in her ear.

"MINNA!! INCLUDING THE LOVEY DOVEY COUPLE!"
yelled Jupiter. "Could we ALL detransform
and figure out who the hell this guy
is??"

Kamen chuckled. "Shall we surprise them?"

Moon giggled. "We shall."

As the two detransformed, still in eachother's
arms, three very loud thuds were heard in the
background. Only Mars was still concious.

"MAMORU-KUN!?!!??" she yelled. Her hands flew
to her cheeks in surprise.

"You bet!" Mamoru bent down and kissed Usagi,
full on the lips. He felt her arms wrap around
his neck and he leaned deeper into the kiss.

"Aw, come on!! This sucks! How did Usagi-baka
get a boyfriend before me? And do you guys HAVE
to kiss in front of me? Virgin eyes here!!" Mars
ranted, standing up and pacing around the still
unconcious bodies of the senshi. "Can't I just
be lonely?"

************************************************

WOW! This is one I wrote a long time ago! *points
to the date below* I figured I'd put it up on
Fanfiction.Net. So, write a review! What are ya
waiting for!

p.s. the little author's note talking about the
aaaoooouhhh thing was a joke between me and
my friend manda/terras. it was from a long long
time ago when monty python was the only fun
thing on the ASMR Discussion board. DON"T ASK!


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{Completed on : Jan. 30th, 2001}