I do not own Harry Potter or the characters. Those belong to JK Rowling. This is my entry to the Hogwart's House Drabble Club Challenge. I have a Fem Harry. Thanks for reading.

I responded to the following prompts:

"Can I have a chocolate frog, please?"

"Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday."

"Who Let the Dogs Out"

"It was a joke, just a joke, I swear."

"Want to play a game?"

"Holy Circe"

"Falling in love was the easiest thing she had ever done"

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."

I also included key words. Go Ravenclaw House!

Her POV

I flopped back against the pillows and tried to catch my breath. I never signed up for this. I turned to my best friend Luna Zabini, who was knitting of all things when she should very well be helping me.

"Can I have a chocolate frog, please?" She hummed and ignored me, intent on the blanket she was making.

"We can just go home and do this tomorrow maybe."

"Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday." What was this drivel she was spouting?

Fine. She has no sense of humor.

"It was a joke, just a joke, I swear, Luna." She finally looks at me.

"Want to play a game?" Is she barking mad? For a brilliant witch, she sure acts like she is a few clowns short of a circus when it pleases her. I will not fall for her little tricks.

"Luna, put down that blanket at once and check on me! Are those kittens and flowers on it? Why are you making a crazy blanket?" She sighed.

"Will you calm down, Hyacinth? You still have plenty of time." Suddenly, I felt an immense pressure and a whoosh of wetness.

"Holy Circe!" She tsked at me and continued to knit. I hate her with her little giddy expression. She stared at nothing for a moment and then she called a house elf who popped in and took care of the leakage. What was she here for again?

The pains started again and I felt him take my hand and kiss it. "Tell me what it is you need, love and I will get it for you." He was such a sap. Who would have thought my sneaky Slytherin was so romantic.

"I want a crup. Bring it to me." He sighed.

"You know I cannot bring an animal into the room right now, my Flower." Whatever! He should not have asked.

Sirius popped his head into the door and said, "Stop bloody procrastinating and get it done, mate!"

I grabbed my wand and shouted, "Langlock!" He was immediately tongue tied and he left the room, taking his theme music with him. It was my own fault for showing him muggle music, but I am tired of hearing 'Who Let the Dogs Out".

I was in pain and I was miserable and my healer was a crazy knitting maniac that was ignoring me and her hair was perfect. When the light hit it just right, it looked like a halo. I cannot stand her! My husband was a lovesick wimpy fool that was afraid of me. I want someone else in here.

"Where is Snape?" My husband reared back like I had smacked him.

"Why do you want Severus?" I pet his hand.

"You are getting on my nerves and I want to fight with someone. I don't want to hurt your feelings and if Sirius comes in here with that music again, I will curse him with a bombarda, a stupefy and an engorgio before I use serpensortia to have snakes slithering all over him." His smile was fixed.

"He is afraid of snakes, Hyacinth. Stop acting like a dementor." Luna chided me as she added a dragon to the blanket.

"I will give all of my fortune and gold for this pain to stop!" It was excruciating. Maybe I could imperio Luna to bring me some pudding. She always has pudding.

"Love, stop thinking about using the unforgivables." Did I say that out loud? I hate him so much right now! This was all his fault!

His POV

I love my Flower, even though she is calling me names and plotting my untimely demise between breaths. My hands and arms are throbbing with pain from her scratching and clawing. She keeps saying that this is all my fault and that she will kill me. I know she can follow through, too. She was deadly on a good day, you really didn't want to meet her on a bad day.

I remember when I first met her. She was a small, gangly thing running through the woods and she happened upon our campsite. She was wild, and free; he didn't want her any other way. We were seven years old and I recognized the scar on her forehead. She had taken very little convincing to prove that magic was real and that our family wanted her to stay with us.

My parents had gotten her guardianship quietly and we had taken her to the healers at Gringott's. My parents later told me that they opened up the wills of Jamie's parents. Her name is Hyacinth Jamiel, but I call her Jamie or Flower most of the time.

It was quite the scandal when it was found that Sirius Black was innocent and he was freed and then the rat was found by Remus Lupin on a visit to the Weasely family. They never quite lived down the shame of having a pet rat for 6 years and never noticing that it was an animagus.

Anyway, all of Jamie's vaults were moved to Spain and locked down and an illegal marriage contract with Ronald Weasley was voided by my parents. Sirius had asked them if they wanted one with me and Jamie and they agreed as long as it had an out clause for both of us. Jamie had loved being trained with me and our friends in secret.

No one knew where she lived after the muggles were put into jail and all of their memories of Jamie were obliviated. That was less than they had deserved. My Flower had nightmares for months after she came to live with us. She would creep into my room and my bed and I would hold her hand all night and cuddle with her. We were instant best friends.

It was like that for four years until Hogwarts started and we had to deal with the Headmaster. He played his games and we pretended to play along. Jamie went into Gryffindor and I went into Slytherin. We met in secret in a room that the elves told us about every other night and at night, our elf, Daisy would pop Jamie to my bed.

Things were going the Headmaster's way or so he thought until her name came out of that goblet. Gryffindor house shunned her and actually excluded her from the house. She waited until after the first task to announce to the whole school that she wanted a resorting.

She made a magical oath that she did not enter the tournament and her patronus was a stag, a dog, a wolf and a panther. She removed her glamours and she was her proper height of 5'9 with long black curly hair and a very pleasing figure. She was immediately sorted into Ravenclaw and all of the points she earned were awarded to that House. Gryffindor was humiliated. That was what they deserved.

Sometimes, I think that the sorting of children into houses was a bad thing, but then again, oh well. Prejudice was tearing the world apart, and I would do nothing but sit down to watch the show.

From the moment of her resorting, Jamie aced her classes. It made Granger apoplectic. All of Ravenclaw house banded together against her and she learned in fifth year that you cannot get top grades by just regurgitating the books verbatim. I hear she works in the Department for the Regulation of Magical Creatures at the Ministry. Good for her.

The Headmaster tried to get Jamie to stay at Headquarters, but Sirius had taken all of the artifacts, tapestries and books from the place. He gave it to them, but it was an empty house. There was no house elf or even food in the cupboards. There were no portraits, either.

Jamie had refused to stay there and she was not reachable during the summers. The Headmaster passed away at the end of our sixth year. Of course, we know what happened to him, because Severus told us. When the old man died, so did the oaths he kept Severus under. We found out so much about him and very little of it was good.

When the final battle happened, it was almost anticlimactic. I watched Jamie fight trolls, giants and vampires with an ease of a soldier. I had never seen anything as beautiful as her, when she was covered in the blood of our enemies, and causing havoc in the battlefield.

She finished off the dark lord and we disappeared from public view. A month later, we announced our marriage in an interview with the Quibbler, complete with wedding photos. A very select group was allowed to attend the Potter-Nott nuptials. Oh, dear Merlin, she is mangling my hand again!

Her POV

You know what they say, "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." But, this was now my life. I looked over at him and he was so handsome and brave, even now.

Falling in love was the easiest thing she had ever done. How could she not love Theo with his quiet, bookish manner and his patience? He was always there for her and even now, he is taking this abuse just to keep me calm. What can I say? Brainy is the new sexy. Focus, Hyacinth!

"Can I push yet, Luna?" She looked up from the beautiful blue and white blanket that had also gained a unicorn and a thestral and smiled at me.

"Of course, Hyacinth. Let me just put this blanket down." She was so calm and her airy almost musical voice betrayed none of my frantic panic. Hey! That rhymed. I think I have officially lost my mind.

"Just let me do this spell, Hyacinth and you can push if you want, but the babies will be out." I want to smack her.

"What do you mean, the babies will be out, Luna? You made me go to birthing classes and learn freaking Lamaze!" She ignored me.

"Three, two, one; time was up." What?

She did the spell and soon there were two screaming little baby boys in her arms. She cleaned them and gave them to me. I stared at their faces and all of the pain I felt faded away.

"Cindy, you were getting on my nerves and I had a deadline. You know I still write part time even with my practice. I needed to get rid of you, so I gave you busy work. Babies in the magical world are delivered quite easily, you know."

That was it! I reached for my wand and was about to say a spell, when the door flew open again and this time it was Snape.

"You bellowed for me, Hyacinth?" He looked impeccable as always and he reached out and took a baby from me.

"Hello, Snape. I was hallucinating earlier, that's all." He made faces at the baby he was holding.

"What in Merlin's name are you doing holding my little grandpup, Snivellous?" Sirius grabbed the other baby and they charmed their blankets to be red for Sirius' and green for Snape's bundle. They were ridiculous.

"Shall I send a Patronus to my parents, Flower?" I smiled and let him kiss me.

"Yes, tell them that our heirs have been born." He stroked my hair and did a tempus.

"It looks like Drake won the pool, both of them. He bet on Halloween and twin boys." I just laughed. I love how my life has been ever since I met him.