Title:
Author:
SarahE-mail:
sajo_morningstar@angelfire.comRating:
PG-13Disclaimer:
I don't own the stars, characters, of Roswell, Jason Katims, Melinda Metz, the WB or the Lyrics of Matchbox TwentySummary:
A future fic. about Max and Liz.Category:
M/LSpoilers:
none, it takes place in the summer after destiny, but I wrote this before season 2… so all the season 2 trauma hasn't happened. IT'S MY WORLD YOUR JUST VISITING! Hope you all like it!Author's note:
Italicized words signify people's thoughts. Guys, come on I'm still new at this…so let me know what you think… be honest, I can take! I love criticism. The song "Bed of Lies" is written and owned by Matchbox Twenty.Crashdown Café; Roswell N.M
"This is one thing I don't miss about being home!" Liz Parker complained as she cleared tables at her parent's restaurant.
"I know what you mean!" Maria De Luca, her best friend, said as she wiped catsup off the table that a little boy had decided to "finger paint" on. "Its good to have you home though!" she continued.
"Yea, it's good to be home" Liz told her. "So how's school? NMU treating you well?"
"Well, actually… I quit. I dropped out right after Christmas."
"YOU WHAT!!!" Liz screamed as she spun around to look at Maria.
"Hey! It's no big deal! Ya'know you've always known Harvard was for you. And look at you… you live in Boston and your on the Dean's list. But me, I always knew college wasn't for me. Don't worry. Please. I promise it'll work out." It was silent between the two for a few minutes.
"Ok. So what's up with Michael? I've been home exactly 8 hours and you haven't said two words about him! What's going on?"
"Well I'm kinda living with him."
"WHAT!? What happened to him and Isabelle? What happened to their destinies?" Liz exploded.
For the last three years she had prayed that Max would change his mind about his destiny and come back to her, even though SHE had let HIM go. And now after all these years, Michael was the one to come back to his true love.
"Well when I came home from Albuquerque he and him started hanging out a lot, so did Alex and Isabelle, 'cause they were still up in school together. Then Is and Alex came home for spring break, Is and Michael decided, 'To hell with destiny', they thought of each other as siblings for so long they could never love each other romantically. So they broke it off."
"What about Max are him and… still…?" she asked hoping for the answer to be no.
"I'm sorry Lizzie."
"Oh well, I never expected it." Liz lied.
"Oh Liz. You know as well as I do that he doesn't love her he just…"
Before she could finish the bell over the door of the café rang and Max walked in…alone. "OhmyGod. It's him." Liz said almost silently. "And he's going to sit in my section." She said just as quietly
Oh my God! It's Liz!
Max thought, when he looked up and saw Liz standing across the café awestruck. They just stood staring at each other until Maria brought Liz back to reality."Do you want me to get him?" she asked seeing the pain on Liz's face.
"No, I have to do it."
"Ok." with that Liz started towards the table Max had just set down at. Ok, I can do this, it's no big deal. She thought as she walked on towards the table. Just then Tess walked in the door and sat down with Max. Liz stopped in her tracks when she saw her then after a moment continued. She almost lost her nerve when she saw Tess lean across the table and kiss Max. Come on Liz, you can do this. She thought to her self as she approached the table.
"Hi. I'm Liz, I'll be your server today. Can I get you something to drink?" She asked, barely keeping it together.
"Hi Liz." Max replied quietly, looking down at the table.
"Why Liz Parker! It's been forever! It's me, Tess! And Max." She exclaimed motioning at Max and acting like Liz would have forgotten him. Yea, like I don't remember! Liz thought sarcastically.
"Oh yea, it's been a while hasn't it. What can I get you to drink?" She asked again quickly.
"Well we'll both have cherry cokes." Tess answered as she grabbed Max's hand. Once again feeling the fear of loosing him to her rise up again.
"Ok, I'll be right back with you drinks."
Later that night
Max came out of the bathroom, turned on the CD player, put in Matchbox Twenty and hit random, then sat down on his and Tess' bed. As he sat he thought about all the emotions that came rushing back when he'd seen Liz earlier that day. All the emotions he thought he'd pushed down and hidden when Liz moved to Boston. Then the thought of all the pain in her eyes when Tess had kissed him came up. And as the music filled the room he realized he couldn't live the lie of living with Tess any more.
No I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn in
And there'll be no rest for these tiered eyes
I'm marking it down to learning
I am
"Hey. You ok?" Tess asked as she came up and wrapped her arms around Max.
"No. I'm not." Max replied as he got up and walked across the room.
I don't think that I can take another empty moment
I don't think that I could fake another hallow smile
Well it's not enough just to be lonely
I don't think that I can take another talk about it
"What's wrong?" Tess asked, but already knowing the answer. He'd been silent and distant all afternoon. Seeing Liz had really shaken him up. Max stood silently looking at all the pictures of him and Tess. Tess was having the time of her life and he had a forced smile in all of them.
"I just can't do this anymore." He finally said.
"Do what Max?" She asked, once again already knowing the answer. She'd known this was coming for months. She also knew there was no way to avoid. She sensed the cold loneliness in him. A loneliness she knew she could never fix or fill.
"I can't live this way. It's a lie. It's all a lie." And with that he got his jacket and headed for the door.
"Wait! Max wait!"
Just like me you've got needs
And they're only a whisper away
And we softly surrender
To these lives that we've tendered away
"I need you Max!" Tess cried as Max went out the door. "Wait! Please! Max! I need you!" Tess called down the street.
"And I need Liz. I don't love you, we both know that."
But I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn in
And there'll be no rest for these tired eyes
I'm marking it down to learning
I'm marking it down to learning
Cause I can
I don't wanna be the one who turns the whole thing over
I don't wanna be somewhere where I just don't belong
Where it's not enough just to be sorry
"I'm sorry, but it's too much for me. I'm sorry to do this to you, but you know I have to.
Don't you know I feel the darkness closing in
Tried to be more than me
And I gave until it all went away
And we've only surrendered to the worst part of these winters we've made
But I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn in
And there'll be not rest for these tired eyes
I'm marking it down to learning
I'm marking it down to learning
I am
Max kept walking, in no particular direction, without a destination in mind. Suddenly he realized he was standing in front of the Crashdown Café. He looked up and saw candles lit all along the ledge of the balcony.
"Liz!" he called up, not meaning to, but naturally, like he'd done a thousand times before.
Liz's Balcony; Earlier that night.
I'm Liz Parker and I've been thinking that no matter how much you think your over someone, you never really are.
When I went to Boston I thought I'd be able to forget Max and get over him. And I did… for a while. Then today being back in the Crashdown and seeing him and Tess again, all the feelings, the hate, the jealousy and the anger came right back. Like it was never gone in the first place.
"Liz!" She heard from the street, the familiarity of the voice sent chills up her spine. Slowly she got up and walked over to the ledge and looked down to the street. There he was standing on the street looking up at her. "Can I come up?" he asked, afraid she'd say no.
"Sure" she nervously told him as she went over and hid her journal. Even after all these years she feared some one finding it and revealing the secret that changed, completed and ruined her life, all in one.
"Hey" Max said as he climbed over the ledge of the balcony
"Hey" Liz replied as an uncomfortable silence fell over them.
"So, your back." Max stated, trying to make conversation.
"Yea for a while." Liz told him "Max, why are you here?" Liz asked as she sat down. Max walked over and looked out at the lights of Roswell. He hadn't planned on coming there, but now that he was there he knew it was where he belonged. And as he stood there he heard the lyrics from earlier that night run through his head.
I am all that I'll ever be
When you - lay your hands
Over me but don't go weak on me now
I know that it's weak
But God help me I need this
I will not sleep in this bed of lies
"I don't know." He answered exasperated. He knew exactly what he needed to say but not how to say it. " I missed you Liz." He said finally.
"You did?" she asked honestly surprised.
"Of course I did. I love you Liz." He replied, almost in a whisper.
"What did you say?" she asked, not believing her ears.
"I said I love you. I always have. I always will… I just hope you can forgive me for not realizing it before." He continued, hoping she believed in and trusted him. Liz didn't answer for a while, she just stared into space.
"What about Tess?" Liz finally asked.
"I never loved her. I never will. I can't love her, Liz…she's not you." He said.
"Then why were you with her for so long?"
"I don't know." He told her honestly. "I just don't know." he said as her came over and sat down by her. The silence was deafening between them. "I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say…"
"I don't know either. My heart wants to trust you, but my heart can't take being broken again either."
"I know it doesn't mean much right now, but I promise you I will never leave you again." He told her as a tear ran down his cheek. Liz looked over at him and saw this. At the sight her heart broke, she realized he was telling her the truth. But she still had more questions. "Why did you leave her?" she asked.
"I couldn't stay. I couldn't sleep another night in that bed of lies, that cold, lonely, empty bed. Knowing only you could fill it." He told her as the tears streamed down his face. Liz wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a tight embrace. And they both cried themselves to sleep the first peaceful sleep either had slept in a long time. The first of many to come.
THE END