Frostbite Ending: Dimtri's POV

Prologue

I had finally reached it.

Acceptance.

I had the spent the last few months struggling for control of my emotions.

Most times, I was successful in action.

But never in thought.

No amount of control could ever repress an emotion that was just too strong to ignore.

And now, no matter how many times I attempted to tell myself that the best opportunity for my career was walking away from me, that other insistent voice in my head reminded me that there was something infinitely more important.

Someone definitely not a Moroi, but whose life I valued so much more. Even if I shouldn't.

Guardian rules were now fading rapidly along with my control.

I could no longer deny it.

I now knew that nothing would ever be able to shake that feeling.

I was completely and utterly in love.

With her.

The feelings had been there all along and all I could feel was relief from finally admitting that I could no longer dismiss it. My only thoughts were of diving in and hoping she still reciprocated.

I had completely lost my control over the situation.

But I had not, however, lost the perspective of the multitude of negative consequences that could come from me pursuing anything further than friendship with her.

Getting myself over the hurdle of denial and admitting and accepting to myself that I loved her was one thing.

Moving past every other hurdle thrown in our way was another.

The age difference.

Me as her mentor, her as my student.

The duty we both had to the princess.

Every other male in the vicinity seeming to want her.

Would there be any way for this to work?

A part of me was determined that somehow it would just have to work.

The realistic side of me rejected this.

After all that has happened, how can I even be sure she feels the same way?

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Chapter 1:

'There you are, Dimka!' Tasha smiled as she opened the door to her suite to permit my entrance.

She kissed my lips lightly before taking my hand and twirling under my arm.

'So?' she asked, gesturing with her other hand to her pale blue skirt that flared out slightly in the turn.

'Very nice,' I appraised her with a nod.

As soon as I heard the words leave my mouth, I internally winced. She quite obviously wanted a better reaction that the term 'nice.' Any other man would say that Tasha was gorgeous and her scarred face did not detract from this. However, as soon as I considered a more enthusiastic description, I was taken back into my memories of that night all those weeks ago. Her dressed in the sinfully tight short black dress. Her asking me if I thought she was pretty. And me telling her she was beautiful. Beyond beautiful. No-one could ever compare…

I brought myself back to the present with a mental shake. The past would stay in the past. I was with Tasha now; she was my present and future.

Or at least, I would keep telling myself that until I believed it.

Tasha seemed satisfied with my response and, with her hand in mine, we left the room to make our way to the royal Moroi banquet being held.

We had only walked a few steps before Tasha stopped suddenly in the hall, narrowing her eyes at my attire.

'Dimka, what are you doing wearing your guardian clothing? I thought you were coming as my date tonight.'

I kept my tone light. 'Sorry Tasha,' I replied, 'but they needed more guardians on duty in the banquet room tonight and because I was already coming with you, they asked me.'

'Duty, duty, duty,' she muttered.

'And besides,' I added with a reassuring smile, 'I'm sure that a royal Moroi banquet will not have Dhampir guardians sitting at the table with the guests. I'll fit in much better with the other guardians.'

She frowned at this. 'You know I'd much prefer to have you sitting next to me rather than standing in the corner.'

I didn't respond to this. She knew as well I did that guardian duty and the protection of the Moroi came before socialising.

'Fine,' she said rolling her eyes. 'But next time, you're sitting with me. I need someone else to talk to other than those bores of Moroi that will be sitting near me. Think of it as protecting my mental health.'

She sent me a wink and I had to laugh in agreement at her prediction of the other Moroi that would be seated with her at the banquet tonight.

'Hopefully they've seated me near Lissa and Christian.'

The mention of Lissa led my mind back to someone else.

Her.

This was becoming ridiculous. I could not spend one night without something reminding me of her.

Tasha was still talking. 'Then, at least, I'll have someone to talk to.'

I was back to the present with her words. Her tone was not bitter but I knew her well enough to know that she was thinking about the large number of Moroi who ignored her.

I squeezed her hand gently, trying to comfort her.

Tasha's face became serious and her blue eyes smoldered as they locked on mine. Her other hand came to rest on my cheek as she leaned up and kissed me. Instead of blue eyes, I saw brown eyes closing as I deepened the kiss and closed my own eyes. I could feel Rose's arms wrapping around my neck, grazing my tattoos. I could hear Rose gasping in awe at the marks.

It was when I threaded my fingers through the shorter hair of the woman in front of me that I realised that this nice, tame kiss was with Tasha. It wasn't the deep, mind-numbing kiss from Rose that was nearly impossible to break away from and that my imagination was desperate to relive.

Horrified to have even come to that conclusion, I broke away from Tasha abruptly.

The shocked look on her face had my mind racing to think of some sort of explanation for my actions.

'I'm sorry, Tasha,' I said with a smile that I hope covered up my guilt and anxiety at the situation, 'but I didn't realise how late it is. We both need to be at the banquet very soon.'

'I'm so lucky to have you in my life, Dimka,' she said as her hurt expression changed to adoration.

She kissed me swiftly on the cheek before intertwining her fingers with mine as we continued walking towards the banquet room.

Her comment made my stomach turn over as I felt increasingly guilty at envisaging kissing Rose whilst kissing her. I needed to forget Rose and learn to love Tasha. It couldn't be that hard: Tasha was intelligent, funny and we had been friends for many years. I forced myself to breathe deeply and let go of the guilty feeling for now. I would deal with this later. Now was not the time.

It was at that moment that we entered the room the banquet was to be held in.

Tasha gave me a small smile before walking towards the table to be seated for dinner. I made my way to the shadows in the perimeter of the room behind her, away from where the other guardians were standing. I really wasn't in the mood to make small talk with anyone.

We actually hadn't been late. There were a large number of vacant seats around the banquet table still. It seemed that Tasha had not been seated next to Lissa as the chairs near Tasha were all filled and I couldn't see Lissa anywhere. I could see Tasha's polite mask as she smiled and spoke to the Moroi woman seated next to her.

Watching Tasha converse comfortably with those around her almost caused me to miss two new arrivals enter the room. I glanced around and saw Lissa enter in a tasteful dress in a deep purple colour.

It was the person next to her that made me stare. Lissa hadn't brought Christian as her date but her.

Rose.

Looking amazingly beautiful.

My breath caught. Her red dress covered at least twice the body area as the previous short black one but its tightness left very little to the imagination of her body's curves. She stood out from the remaining Moroi. As she moved to sit down next to Lissa, I saw that she had styled her long, dark hair so that it was down and loose but moved to one shoulder, revealing an expanse of the back of her neck where a promise mark and probably multiple molnija marks would soon be.

Food was served soon after Lissa and Rose's arrival and I forced myself to look away from Rose and watch Tasha.

I was used to staying alert whilst watching a Moroi from the back of a room.

Tasha was still conversing with those near her but I could tell from her stretched smile that she wearing thin from the idle chatter. On the other hand, I saw that Rose seemed very quiet tonight. She spoke to Lissa on occasions but she seemed politely silent for most of the time. I could imagine the reason for this being that she was the only Dhampir as a guest.

Dinner soon finished and the guests all stood to socialise with each other. Tasha continued talking to the Moroi who had been sitting next to her. Rose was following Lissa who had drifted over to a small group of Moroi at the side of the room. Whilst Lissa looked to be in her element, Rose stood next to her with an uncomfortable look on her face.

'So, Dimitri,' came a voice from my right and I quickly averted my gaze from Rose.

Looking to where the voice had come from, I struggled to avoid gritting my teeth at the source: Adrian Ivashkov.

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AN: This is my first VA fic so I'm a bit nervous… please review and tell me what you think!