(A/N) This is my first story so bear with me. This story is AU so if someone doesn't like that kind of stories please don't read it. And I know that some ages are wrong but I want it to be like that. So bear with me please.
Age:
Taichi - 16
Yamato – 16
Sora - 16
Joe - 17
Mimi - 15
Kari - 14
TK - 14
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I couldn't stand it, it was too hard for me. Why everything had to be like that? Now they hated me. And it was all my fault, I shouldn't tell him this. If I could take back time...
FLASHBACK
''Matt can we talk?'' I asked him when we entered the lunchroom. He nodded and went after me.
When we were outside I started to say '' Matt I...I...think I like you...more than just a friend...'' I didn't know how I made it, how I told him this but the truth was that I loved him. Loved him with all my heart. I kept in inside of me for a long time and I felt like I couldn't anymore. It was too hard to kept it as a secret. I knew how people looked at those who were 'gay' so that scared me a little. I didn't tell it to anyone but my worst fear always was and always will be: the rejection.
So I tried to pretend that I was normal. That I liked girls. I was scared how others will react. But now I found the courage and I was standing in front of my love waiting for his move.
I hoped that he would understand me. He always stood by my side no matter what, so I thought that today he'll comfort me and maybe fell the same way? I patiently waited for him to reply. He was shocked I could tell. His beautiful blue eyes were now wide open. When I wanted to break the silence I heard someone. A girl.
''Ewwwwwww! That's disgusting! How can you be a fag?! '' It wouldn't be so bad if she didn't scream it so loud. People could hear it. And of course they did. I could fell their gaze at me.
I didn't know that she would hear me, I guessed she went after us silently and heard our conversation, or rather mine words. And it wouldn't hurt so much if that girl wasn't Sora, my friend.
I looked at Matt to see what he would do, but he still was silent.
''And what you have to say?'' I asked him
'' I just found out that my best friend is a fucking fag and you...'' but he didn't finish this sentence. He put his hand on his mouth like he told something really bad. But I was glad he did, now I knew what he thought of me. The prof was enough to me to know he hated me
I couldn't bear with it, it was too much for me. I ran away. But the worse was that he never went after me...
I knew I was stupid, but somewhere I prayed that maybe if he came after me...
END OF FLASHBACK
Now I was standing here in the middle of nowhere, crying. I liked the rain. The drops mixed with my tears. I didn't know how long I was standing there but when I returned home it was late. Dad wasn't home like always...
When my mom died in a car accident two years ago , he changed. But still he tried to do the best. I went straight to my room ,to my bed. But I couldn't sleep. I had too much in my head. I didn't know when I fell asleep , I remember only opening my eyes seeing a shiny light. I looked at the clock and...shit!
I would be late if I didn't hurry up! Quickly I gathered some books and changed in clean uniform. When I was done I ran to the school.
I entered my classroom as the bell rang. Ha! I wasn't late, but when I heard the word 'queer' I looked at the other students. They were looking at me with disgust.
I bowed my head and went to find a seat. I usually was sitting with Matt, but I didn't think it would be ok with him if I just sat next to him like nothing ever happened. I sat next to the window in the last seat. My new desk was as far as it was possible from the others.
Finally the bell rang. And the hell was over. It was the worst lesson ever. Everybody was sending me glares and whispering about me. They could talk out loud because I heard every word. But I kept being quiet,
I didn't want to give them another reason to hate me.
When I was walking to my other lesson some boys from other grade came and started to calling me names. I pretend it didn't matter what someone was thinking about me, but it really hurt.
I didn't know how but somehow I made it to the lunch. All classes were awful. People were cruel, now I knew that.
I went to the lunchroom in order to find my friends. Izzy, Joe, TK and Kari my little sister. I knew I could always count on her, she would never leave me. When I went to sit next to them, they stood up and went away ,not bothering to say a word to me, like I wasn't wort it. I guess I am not. But then Kari looked at me and said
''I don't have a brother anymore ''
I didn't reply, I couldn't. Then TK looked like he wanted to say something but he was met with Matt's gaze which looked like -speak-with-him-and-you-will-pay- look. I understood his situation. Matt was his brother and he couldn't put me above him. So I wasn't mad at him, not at all. But besides he was the only one who didn't look discussed with me.
So that was it, I was alone now with whole school hating me. Yay for me.
At the end I had soccer practice. I didn't know what to do. Go there or forget about it? I loved soccer, it was the only one reason why I didn't run from school today. I guessed it will help and change my mood.
But I was wrong.
No one from my team spoke with me. When we played they 'accidentally' kicked me or I always tripped by their legs. At the end coach yelled at me because I didn't focus on the training so I had to stay and do extra laps.
I could finally go home and relax in my room, in my comfy bed...but I was only met with angry face of my father. He was so pissed, I could tell...
He started to yell at me, telling me how pathetic I was, how worthless, how shameful...
Then he told me to go out and never come back because he wouldn't live with a ' fucking fag' in one house. So I did. I ran away seeing shocked Kari in the doorway. I really wanted to know why she was shocked. She was the one who told this our father, probably she wanted dad to punish me or something, but she didn't suppose it will cost me this. I knew my sister for whole her life and one look was enough to knew she was felling guilty. But did I care? I only wanted to disappear.
I told you that I liked the rain, right? Now I loved it. Again I could fell it on my wet cheeks.
I went to the park. I liked spending time in there and think. I didn't have anywhere else to go anyway.
I sat on the wet grass and looked at the sky. The cold drops were making me cold, but I didn't care about that. I didn't remember much later. Only rain which was falling harder and harder...then everything went black.
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I woke up from my sleep in a comfortable bed. I looked around the room and then I closed my eyes again falling back to sleep, but when I was going to drift to my dreams ,my eyes widened. I looked around one more time again. Then I looked at myself. Oh my God. I wasn't in my house, I wasn't in my room, I wasn't in my bed and definitely I wasn't wearing my clothes! Where was I? The room was small and clean...yes it couldn't be my room.
But when I was going to get up the doors opened.
''Hey! You are finally awake!'' some boy cheered. He was so...strange? Too happy? I dunno something between it.
He wasn't much taller than me, maybe two inches. He got short dirty blond hair and green eyes. He was wearing dark jeans and black T-shirt with the red word ''slut'' on it. He got one earing in his left ear and in his right brow.
''You are in our place since yesterday night when we found you on the street'' his voice reached my ears when I was wondering where the fuck I was.
I wanted to ask him something but he was faster because he grabbed my hand and started shaking it
'' I'm Maximilian, but please call me Max. I hate that name! My mom give it to me when I was born...wait she did? No maybe that was my father? Or maybe just a nurse in the hospital? But I won't know now will I?''
I looked at him like he was insane, but still he went on
''I never met my parents so I lived with my foster family since I was two. They were pretty cool, but when I was fifteen they kicked me out...''
'' Stop with your babling'' It was another male. He had got messy black hair and onyx eyes. He was taller then the blond one. And he got earrings in his ears, and one in his brow and in his tongue
''Hey! I only...'' Max started to say, but was cut off by a hand put on his mouth.
'' I'm Ryan and that blond guy is Max, but I think you knew that already. Sorry for him, his mouth never shuts up'' the dark haired man stated. He wore a black leather pants and red T-shirt with strange symbol on it.
Then someone else come into the room. Another male. He was in Ryan's height. He got light blue hairs which were hanging to his shoulders and his eyes were just like his hairs. He was wearing a black jacket and black trousers.
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And that's how I met my new family. Yes, they were like family to me. After I told them I didn't have any place to go they offered me this room. I gladly took their offer, because seriously where I would go?
And the more important was that they accepted me. And they like me were gay. So I was living with them in their apartment,
They took me to shops and bought new clothes, because like they said I looked sexier in leather. Still in my opinion they shouldn't have done that because I won't pay them back, but they told me it was a present. After that Max gave me some of his old clothes as well, he was only eighteen. Only two years difference. Ryan and Kyle were twenty one years old. They were like brothers because they lived in one orphanage. After they were eighteen they could go and do whatever they wanted, so they did.
The last thing that I excepted from them was taking me somewhere where I would get a 'nice surprise' like they put it. And how I ended? I pierced my ears, right brow and lip...
But I didn't know one thing, From where they got all that money? From what I knew they didn't ended school , so they couldn't have a good job. Maybe I will ask them?
''Ryan, can I ask you something?''
''Yeah sure'' came the reply. Whenever I got some problem I always asked him. I didn't know why but with Ryan I felt...safe?
'' What are you all doing for life?''
'' Selling''
Selling?! What kind of answer was that?! How can you be selling...I didn't know what he was talking about, so I decided to ask again.
'' Selling what?''
I waited for his answer but it never came instead I saw him move towards me. He put his hand on my shoulder and whispered to my ear making me shiver.
''You're so innocent, I bet you didn't do it ''
He sat next to me on the cough and held me by my shoulders. He leaned down and slowly kissed me on the lips. I didn't know how to react, I didn't know what to do. But slowly I closed my eyes and gave into the kiss.
I never felt that way. What could I do then? Push him away? I couldn't do that, I didn't want to loose only people who cared about me...But I liked it. It was my first real kiss.
He was slowly and lightly drawing his tongue across my lips asking for permission, when I gave it to him, he slid it into my mouth.
He started to explore my tongue in a light licking motion. Then he started to suck on it, wrestling with it. Damn it felt so good. I was enjoying it, my thoughts about pushing him away dissappered.
While he was exploring lightly the other areas, especially the roof of my mouth I moaned. I didn't know when his fingers started to run through my hair, but he was so gentle...
But then it ended. I was breathing hard and fast. I didn't know what to say, I wasn't used to that kind of situations.
'' Now you know what our job looks like? ''
I raised my head only to met his dark eyes. They were so dark, yet you could look at them all day. I nodded not knowing what to say. And then he smiled, it wasn't a smirk, it was the most beautiful smile that I ever saw. His hand rubbed gently my chin.
'' I will show you what it's like.''
I didn't understand the meaning of this words. He must see the puzzled look on my face because after some time he quietly said
'' Being loved.''
I didn't know how I found myself in his room, in his bed. But I gave into him completely. I lost my virginity that night.
He showed me what being loved meant and it was the most incredible thing. He was so passionate and gentle at the same time. But I couldn't offer him much I didn't even kiss anybody before him. But he told me that I would learn in time.
After that night we started to going out. I was glad I found somebody like him. But the most important thing was that when I was with Ryan I didn't think about Matt. Every time we touch I didn't give a damn about the world around me.
I didn't mind his 'job'. They all did the selling thing. But it really didn't bother me.
After some time I started to wonder. How about to start earning money on myself? It was Ryan or others who always gave me things like clothes, food and even home so maybe I will do something for them.
I asked him if I could and I must admit it his answer didn't surprise me much. He told me that I can't do it without more practice...and again I ended in his room...
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After two weeks I showed in school. I bet they all though I was dead or something. As soon as I entered school hall everybody looked at me with widen eyes. Immediately as I went to my locker I heard whispers about me. Heh some of them were like '' Oh my god he is so sexy!'' but like I said only some of them because most were like: ''look that queer is back!''. But I didn't care.
The time that I spent with Ryan and the rest taught me some things. One of them is:
If people want to talk about you- let them. And don't bother change their opinion, it's not worth it.
I did what they told me to. I didn't worry about it. Most people hated me here, so that was their problem not mine.
As I grabbed my books the bell rang. I didn't bother to run, I slowly made my way to my class. I had History first. I never liked that subject anyway. When I opened the door I heard my name which was called by the teacher. He probably was checking our presence.
''Here''
As I said it everyone stopped doing whatever they were doing and looked at me. I saw Matt and Sora with shocked expressions on their faces. I looked at the teacher who after shaking his head , probably from shock ordered me to sit on my seat. As I went on I could feel everyone's gaze on me. Did I change that much?
I wore black pants with leather look panels on the shins and buckles on side of lower leg and black boots.
I had a short sleeved T-shirt with mask of the Devil designed on front.
And the words written in bloody red color '' God is busy ,Can I help you?''
I really liked that shirt...
Pair of pewter pentagram stud earrings was hanging from my ears.
And a giant, wiry spider of polished pewter was sewn onto my throat on the black leather necklaces with spikes. That was Ryan's present. I usually went everywhere with it.
And I had one earring in my brow and lip. They weren't special. They were normal without any additions.
Teacher started to tell some things about history. . .I didn't know what it was about. Most of the students tried to pay attention but others were sending me strange looks. Matt and Sora tried to do their best to not look at me ,but whenever they though I wasn't seeing they looked at me over and over again, like they were searching something. As the lesson ended I went to my locker. But as I was going someone stood in my way. It was Kari, my 'sister'.
She looked like she saw a ghost ,but she didn't tell a word. But I would have to not know her to not see her worried eyes. But like she had said I was NOT her brother. So again, I didn't care, or at least tried to.
'' You have my English book '' I heard a familiar voice.
I turned around to see Matt standing behind me. Did I really have his book? And why was he telling me it now? I looked inside of my locker...and guess what I found. Matt's book. I gave it to him without any word and closed my locker with my books inside. He looked at me with strange expression and then asked
'' What are you doing? You'll need that books.''
''I don't feel like staying in here''
And with that I left. Left that fucking school, and fucking people inside. Why the hell he was talking to me in the first place?! From what I heard he hated me! Because I was a ' FUCKING FAG! So what the hell did he want from me?! Fuck him and everyone else. I hope I will find Ryan somewhere, or maybe I will go and earn some money? I will do it.
So I skipped the rest of lesson and went to see if I would find some customers.
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(A/N)So what do you think? Good /Bad/ Horrible?
I would be really glad if you told me your opinion and tell me to continue it or not?
Remember that English is my second language so there are lots of mistakes and I am sorry about that.
I usually write longer chapters so sorry for this one. I know it's a bit short.