It sort of looks bad, and is sort of embarassing, that all of my stories for Code: Lyoko up until now have been centered on romance. Let's try something new, eh?

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"Do you want to talk about it?"

I shake my head, a no. I don't want to talk about it. Even if I wanted to, I can't. My voice has gone, probably from all the crying, It could be that something that's switched off in my brain. I don't care, really. Talking won't bring her back.

The woman sighs, and I feel sort of bad. Even though I don't feel like talking, I don't like to upset people. Now she's trying to reason with me. "Look, Tamiya, this isn't getting us anywhere. I'm here because your friends and teachers are worried about you. Personally, I'm worried about you, too."

I look up at her. "That's right, I'm worried about you. This isn't healthy. What if you stay silent for so long that you lose the use of your vocal cords? And emotionally, bottling up your feelings is unsafe as well. You ever shake a can of soda and have it explode all over you? We don't want you to explode."

The woman picks up a can of some store-brand soda from her desk and pushes on the tab. It opens with a hiss, and she passes it to me. I take it as she pops open her own soda and we sip in silence, the bubbly liquid scorching my throat like liquid fire.

"Instead, we want you to open up. Can you hear the soda talking? Listen." She presses her can to my ear, and I resist the impulse to move away. The can isn't even cold, but I can hear the little whispers of bubbles floating to the top and bursting. "Sounds a lot better than the hiss of static an exploding drink causes, right?" I nod.

"Anyway, this probably seems all weird to you, right? This crazy counselor who talks about soda instead of thoughts?" She grins, and I half-smile back. I don't want her to feel like she's failing at her job, but honestly, we still aren't getting anywhere. I still can't speak, and I still feel sick as heck.

I pull the legal notebook over to my side of the desk, and quickly scrawl, 'What's your name?'

She pulls the tablet over to her side, and takes a pen from her cup. 'Symone. Simone Locoer.' I smile at the unnecessary written repetition of the first name, and she laughs back.

'Sorry. If I could talk, I would,' I scribble, and she reads it upside down.

"It's okay for now. Until then, let's try and get that voice back, okay?" She stands, and moves to my side of her desk. I stand, and she embraces me in a tight hug. I awkwardly try to get over my surprise and hug her back, and she laughs. "You're free to leave, Tamiya Diop," she says in a fake-sounding deep voice, and opens the door to her office.

I do leave, wave back at her, and head towards the doors of the administration building, or HQ, as I like to call it. I can go relax now; it's Friday, and there's nothing else to do. Normally, I'd be meeting with Milly, but... Milly is dead now.

Death really messes with your head, you know. I'm expecting to turn the corner and see Milly waiting for me in front of the dorm room, with her microphone in hand. I turn the corner and she isn't there. There're only the open doors to the Dormitory Block A building, and someone's backpack, laid against the steps. And next to the building, a large expanse of empty ground, surrounded by building materials and roses, dedicated to those lost in the freak earthquake.

I only wish that she was here.

As I enter my own dorm room, I turn on my boom box and pop in my favorite CD to chill out to: My Bloody Valentine's Loveless. Some say that it really isn't suited for relaxing, but I beg to differ. It's easy for me to get lost in the sonic mayhem, and when I slip on my headphones, I fall asleep in a heartbeat. With the stereo gently blazing, I can take in my anti-drug a little slower.

I close the door, ease the knob a little higher, and switch on my laptop. I think I'll do a bit of typing for... for the school paper, and then I might torrent the rest of Paranoia Agent.

I think I'll be okay. I'm already past that point where the fact that you're best friend is gone really hits you. All I think of at this point is the memories. I'm still keeping count absentmindedly, though; it's been two months, three days, and six hours since I heard that Tamiya was killed.

And you know the worst thing about it? She died peacefully, doing what she loved – journalism. We were staying at Kadic for summer vacation, as we were both orphans, and didn't have any family to visit. Sucks, right? Well, we heard news that freak weather was in the area, and we decided to check it out. Stupid, right? We didn't think that' it' be anything major. On the news, there were no major changes. No tornadoes were predicted, no hurricanes, no earthquakes. The only weird thing was a large cloud, impossibly big, and ominously dark.

Honestly, it should not have existed. It was too big to stay afloat, so to speak, and too tall. But it did. And with it, it brought carnage.

Moving on now. Milly and I walked outside, and got some footage of the giant shelf. It was moving pretty fast, and just in case, we went back inside.

And then, the earthquake hit.

I acted on impulse, and now I thank God for those earthquake drills we used to do when we were younger, and thought they were stupid. I grabbed Milly, pulled her under the doorway, and we braced each other as the world fell apart around us. The camera was still rolling, pointed at the ground, and Milly and I crouched on the floor, hugging each other and hoping we wouldn't be crushed. After all, the Kadic dormitory is three stories high.

We were fine, though – the solid metal doorway held, and we were surrounded by rubble, in a small pocket of space. After a moment's hesitation, I turned the camera's light on and pointed it at Milly.

We were both acting solely on... what, instinct, impulse, or just working by rote? She started speaking, and I can't help but remember what she said.

"Th-this is Milly with KNN – Kadic News Network. Me and my co host Tamiya are trapped here under what's left of the Kadic dormitory Block B. An earthquake has just hit Kadic College, and we are still here. We don't know how long our air will last, or how long we'll be trapped here. We hope that this eyewitness footage may be of some help in the future."

She laughed then, and said that her delivery was so unprofessional. I laughed with her, and we were a little calmer. She opened her mouth to say something else, and then we heard a small noise like water being poured from a bucket.

We both looked up, and of all things to do, I kept the camera trained on her. And then, something shifted, and the rock came down on her. A moment she was there, and then in an instant, she wasn't.

I couldn't believe my eyes. Did Milly just... I couldn't even finish the thought. But then, I saw the blood seeping out from between the rocks, rocking like tide against my crossed legs. I could feel the vibrations as the ground was impacted right in front of me. I can still remember hearing my own screams as the realization hit me, and...

And after that, I blacked out. I don't know if it was lack of oxygen, or shock, or what. My memories begin in the hospital, with an IV drip and the Headmaster at my side. I looked at him, and he looked at me, and it was like he understood that I wanted to know if Milly was there or not. As he slowly shook his head and closed his eyes, I simply laid my head against the pillow and let the tears come. It was final; she was dead. I could and can only hope she died instantly.

He laid his hand on mind, and I took it, and squeezed. After that, I fell asleep, and haven't spoken since.

It's times like these, then, when I'm listening to Loveless, that I think of her. It's sort of sad, isn't it? Our favorite song was "I Only Said", from Loveless. It was our favorite album to have playing in the background while we edited video, or set gutters, or fixed the kerning on the layouts. We listened to lots of other stuff, too, like Massive Attack, Linkin Park and Creed, but... that one album was special.

So, laying here with my head on the warm lid of my laptop, and "I Only Said" blaringly gentle in my ears, I cry. I cry for her, for the horrible way in which she dies, and the hurt she left behind. My tears then change from sadness to anger, and I bite back a sob. I'm not angry with her; I'm really mad that she isn't here.

It's maddening to know that I could've tried to do something in that one moment when it all came down around us, but I only kept the camera focused on her. And as much as I hate to admit it, there was nothing I could do.

What if we had walked the extra distance to the lunchroom? What if we had stayed late to help Ms. Hertz clean the science lab like we thought about doing? There are so many "What if" questions, but there was only one outcome. Was there anything I could do? I want to go back and try at least something. I can't though, logic tells me. Even if I did go back there, I wouldn't have made a difference. But that's life... you know?

Wiping away my tears, I guess I'm still not completely over it, and I don't know if I'll ever be. Will my voice come back? Will I ever be able to listen to our song without being reminded of her, without crying? Time will tell, I guess. Until then, I'll try to make do without her. She'd want that, at least. I can only try to give it to her.

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That was pretty difficult to write. Tell me in a review if I should continue or not. It's just an oneshot for now, but I have ways of extending it. Cheers. -_-"