I love Natsume Yuujin Chou. The author is amaaazzziiinnnggg with her ability to tug at my heart strings both painfully and joyfully. IDOL. Written first in a passing youkai's view. Sad to say, nothing Midorikawa-sensei herself has not covered. But I felt the need to write something pretty and soppy. D: And I just watched Natsume. And I can't seem to write slash for Natsume, so just this emotional sop instead. :]

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Midorikawa-senseeeiii. Please write more. ILU FOREVER.

The Flower That Passes By

Long ago by human reckoning, I had passed through these fields. Then too, the fields were bright green and full of life beneath the sky. As my feet trudges across the acres, I thought that maybe it wasn't so bad to settle once in a while. That maybe, having roots would be nice to one such as I, wandering across the surface of the country. But it's just a passing fancy. My fate does not allow me to stop, doesn't give me more than a few breaths of calm. A strong gust of wind raced across the fields, almost tearing the cloth mask from my face.

I paused.

There in the distance, was a familiar figure racing along the distant hill. Their mouth moved, and looked to be in quite a hurry. I was about to interfere, but upon remembering that affairs of the humans were none of my business, I turned and headed for the calmer woods. A nagging thought tugged at my mind however. That human was vaguely familiar. My mind wandered through the hazy memories, touching on one dream like thought after another. I couldn't place it.

Stopping by a creek, I watched the sun dapple across the surface. Its reflection splattered back into the forest, in an intangible web of light. I loved these beautiful scenes. So simple, but its purity was something that was hard to find in this world. I travelled to many places, and have seen many things. I have come to treasure these untouched corners.

CRASH.

As usual, scenes of calm are all too easily broken.

"Curse you! Natsume! Come out so I may eat you!"

Natsume… how very familiar… But I couldn't forgive the oafish interruption to my space.

"Silence! Can you not see that I am here, enjoying a break? Why the noise?" A sharp amethyst eye peered from behind the mask.

The furry thing with claws puffed out its chest.

"You fool! You know not of Natsume? He is the famous Keeper of the Book of Friends! If I eat him, I shall be master to all!"

Book of Friends… Natsume… My thoughts clicked.

"You are the foolish one. Begone!"

A flash of light temporarily washed out the sunlight. The beast had run away howling, defeated in an instant. Looking at my hands, I sighed. The blood red marks slowly faded, leaving nothing in their wake. Nothing, not a trace to suggest their existence. I clenched my fists.

Finding my current place tasteless, I once more stood to move on.

It's sometimes hard to walk across populated places. But today, I felt the need to be close to something, anything. I want to close this distance, even somewhat. I can't touch these humans that walk on by, but at least I can walk next to them. It's so laughable for one such as I, but when you have no more recourse, no more options, you do what you need to do.

Taking the form of an ordinary lady, I walked too, pretending that I belonged, pretending I had a place to go to.

Right before my eyes, Natsume walked into view. Carrying a large white, bag-like living being, he called out to someone ahead of him in the crowd. They turned, smiling shyly. Natsume hurried to match his steps with the other human.

I was puzzled. I thought Natsume did not like humans? Didn't he have long flowing hair much like mine? Why did he cut it? Curious, I followed them.

They laughed together, they ate food together. From time to time, they would put their hands on each other's arms, affirming their close relationship. Such ordinary gestures, yet ones I couldn't have. I felt a familiar twinge of envy. At one point, Natsume was caught bodily by his friend, as the white thing pushed him over in a hurry to get to some fried squid. This Natsume was so different to the one I met, the one that was so very lonely.

I mulled. How humans change. Not only in their form, but also their personalities. If only we were like them. Maybe, the long journeys wouldn't be so long.

I stopped.

"Why are you following us?" Before me, the white thing Natsume had been carrying appeared. "Natsume's mine, just so you know,"

"Who are you? I don't remember you with Natsume,"

"Ahh… another one who's confused the two generations. You know it's getting old…" the weird thing grumbled. "That's Reiko's grandson, it's not the Natsume you knew,"

Oh… grandson. I left my form return to the original. I've had enough.

"Oh! It's you. You're the one that rid us of the fuzzball from before,"

"Indeed. I am glad that the Natsume now isn't so lonely. If you would, please give this token to Natsume. I had always thought to give this to him had I met him again. I don't need it any more,"

"Well since you got rid of the thing from before for us, I'll help out just this once. Remember it well! Goodbye."

His ungainly form disappeared quickly. Looking over, I could see that Natsume's companions have once again increased. I turned. I have not found my own friend as of now, so I cannot speak to you just yet. One day, I'll be back to tell you of my adventures. It was time to continue to journey.

"Sensei! Where have you been?" Natsume's voice carried a little tinge of worry. "With that thing following us, I'd feel better if you didn't disappear,"

"Hah! We don't have to worry about it. An old friend of your grandma's took care of it for us," Sensei took to the watermelon slices with glee. "Watermelon, my sweet sweet melon!"

Natsume was stunned. It's been a while since he's heard his grandmother mentioned.

"Oh… Reiko's "friend"? Does that mean I have to return their name?"

"No need. They've probably moved on. It was one of those travelling types. Oh that's right! Here, it left you this thing,"

Sensei dropped an old and slightly dirty looking hair clip into his hand. Natsume turned it over. It looked to be a typical hair clip that any young lady would have worn.

"Why don't you try wearing it? It might give you special powers to conjure up delicious manjuu!"

Natsume laughed and placed the clip on the table. He proceeded to fight Sensei for the left over melon slices.

Scenery passed by. From cold, remote mountains to warm beaches by the sand, I thought I've been through it all. My eyes have seen it all.

But through it, I couldn't displace the emptiness. This feeling lodged at the base of my heart. From the moment I was born, nothing was able to touch me. Human, or ayakashi. I often looked to others' interaction with a mixture of curiosity and envy. But I did not know why.

But then she showed me.

She took my hands, and taught me to braid my long hair. She placed a clip in it, telling me that it's a charm to stave off my loneliness.

Oh that's it! That's the feeling in my heart! It's loneliness!

Her warm touch illustrated better than any words could. It framed my loneliness clearly. I wondered how I never noticed the pain that plagued my heart. All that travelling, all that searching was for this.

A game? Okay, I'll play.

I won.

Her face fell. But the sunny smile returned, as she said that I could devour her.

I refused. She told me I was kind. I said that it was merely that a human child so like myself would only hurt my digestion.

The true kindness was from you, little human child. I will travel now to strengthen my heart, and find someone else I could touch, and talk to them about you. Maybe I'll come back and introduce you.

Until then, goodbye.

I journeyed on.

Natsume flipped over. Tears flickered briefly in the moonlight. He was glad of the warm weight of Sensei, and his ruffly snores.

Clutching the clip tight, Natsume held on tight to the precious memory.