"I loved her too," Veronica said, apropos of nothing, and yes he did just use apropos and know what it means, shut up. For some reason, probably some angsty noir case related reason, the invincible Veronica Mars seemed… off. And he was bored, so… he offered to drink with her a little. As further proof of her offness, big strong lone hero Veronica actually said yes. So they were, drinking a few bottles outside his house in serious, gritty, badass silence, the dark night sky, clouds covering the stars, representing their… hearts or somethin'. Or whatever. Veronica's supposed to be the noir detective with the stupid metaphors anyway. Point is, things were chill till Veronica had to bring up… this.
"Yeah, I know. Best friends and all," Weevil replied, hoping to shut this down. Not to demean it, or anything. God knows he lost too many best friends, and that ache don't go away. But when he drinks, he wants to drink to forget. Not remember.
"No, I…" she paused, looked down, then looked at him, raw, honest, that eternal Mars armor down just a little more than usual. And like always, it freaking took his breath away. When did he become a whipped puppy? "I loved her."
Oh. "Oh." Poignant. Weevil's shining moment, everyone.
"Yeah. I've been in… denial, I guess. But…" she chuckled, in that bitter Veronica way of hers, that said she saw the humor in the crappiness of everything but that never meant for one instant that she liked it, "…I'm a detective. And when all it takes is one word out of context said in the hallways or looking at a dress vaguely like she wore and I flashback to… to the stupidest little talk with her about… about her new pair of shoes or how cute Tom Cruise is, when I see and hear her everywhere, when I… devoted my life to avenging her… The clues are just... there, you know? " The bitter humor dropped from her voice, replaced with wistfulness. "The world was bright and covered in light with her around. Her smile was the sun, her laugh like church bells, and I don't even like church, but if a church had church bells like Lilly's laugh, I'd go every day." She trailed off, staring into the sky, then shook her head. "Where was I?
"Church bells."
"Right. She was… beautiful. She was the sun, and I caught in her orbit. I'll compare her to a summer day, she was my immortal, I loved the waaaaay she moved. And all that sappy crap. And as soon as she died, even before the fallout from my dad's investigation… the world went dark. …I don't think I've felt the sun in a year." Weevil stayed silent. He just looked at her, and wondered what the hell to say. There was a lull in the silence before, "Plus, Lilly's boobs looked so good in that dress. Like, woah. That led to some awkward dreams, lemme tell you." He smiled gently at her, and she gave a small one back. It was a sad one, but ey. It was a start. "…It never would've happened with me." She didn't say 'it never would've happened with me either', but it was there. He heard it. He was thankful she at least had the decency to not say it out loud. "Lil was… amazing. But… she loved her popularity. With Duncan being the favorite and her parents always being on her case, it was… all she had. If I came out…" She shrugged. "I wasn't the first friend she abandoned."
There was a silence. Weevil took another swig from his bottle before looking at her. "You're wrong," he finally said. Veronica lifted his head and looked at him, surprised. 'Pparently she thought that was the end of the convo. "It wasn't… all she had. The popularity. …She had you."
"Weevil-"
"Lemme finish. She had you. She talked about you all the time. Her BFF. The one person she could always rely on. Who stuck with her not because she was Lily Kane, the most popular fashionista in school. But because she was Lilly Kane, the dork with that silly laugh and stupid jokes. She knew what everyone who's met you knows, Mars. You're special. And you're loyal for life. She loved you. I dunno if it was the way you loved her, or… the way I loved her. Sometimes I don't even know if she loved me the way I loved her." A slight personal touch. To show her he's not bullshitting. And thank god, she wasn't looking at him with damn pity. Just.. understanding. "But she loved you. So don't do her a disservice by thinking she'd abandon you, alright?"
"…Thanks, Weevil."
"Don't mention it."
"Weevil?"
"Yeah?" He swore to God. If she was going to offer up some bullshit reassurance that Lilly loved him too…
"...Lilly was an idiot to choose Logan over you." He couldn't hold back a laugh at the unexpected comfort. Trust Veronica to go that route. He liked that about her. She kept it real. Wouldn't give you lies if you didn't ask for it.
"Everybody's an idiot to choose someone else over me. Have you seen me?" Veronica rolled her eyes. "And to choose someone over you. We're caches."
"Damn straight."
It's just especially stupid to pick Logan."
"Here here."
He took another drink, then smirked. "Sooo… does that mean there really is somethin' between you and that Meg girl?"
Veronica let out a chuckle that she probably meant to be a scoff, and when she looked at him, her eyes were hard and challenging but with the glint in her eyes that showed it was all part of their endless little game. "She's dating Duncan, you know."
"I don't hear a no in there." She laughed again, this time not even trying to hide it. "Sides, I can fix that."
"No!" She nudged him, laughing. "I can take care of my own love troubles, thank you." He smirked, and opened his mouth. "My hypothetical love troubles, I mean!"
"Fine, fine! Still, offer's open. Duncan can just… take a shower one day, and suddenly, as if by magic… his hair's green." Veronica laughed hard, the drink obviously getting to her. "Or bald. Whatever you suggest, my lady."
"Stop! Geeze." He smiled at her, and she smiled back. Easy. Companionable. He'd never tell anyone this, but it was… nice. "…You're a good friend, Weevil."
"I'm sorry, did we just step into an after school special?"
"I'm serious. I know we have this whole… banter and favors thing, but.. you are my friend. One of my best. Just… you should know that."
"Yeah, yeah. And friendship is magic and knowing is half the power." Veronica punched his arm. "Okay, okay! You're my friend too, Mars."
"Good." She smiled, all charm and reality, all freedom and burden, all driven and lost. All Veronica.
Meg was a lucky girl.
He'd never tell anyone that either.
"...Sometimes, I wonder if I'll ever avenge her," she said bluntly. If she was looking for comfort, it wasn't in her voice. It was just admitting a secret. "If I'll ever find… the truth."
"You will," he replied, quick and easy. He learned not to underestimate this girl a long time ago.
"And if you say it, it has to be true!" she teased.
"Damn straight." They clanked bottles, and took another swig. "'Specially cause I'm gonna help ya. Every step of the way."
She smiled. He smiled back. Dammit. Totally a whipped puppy. "I know Weevil. Nobody else I'd have by my side."
"'Cept Michael Jordan, right?"
Veronica gasped dramatically. "What's this? Big bad Weevil jealous of dorky little Wallace?"
"Please. I'd much rather handle the money side of sports, thank ya very much."
"Now where's that inspirational based on a true story sports movie?" He chuckled, shaking his head. "...Seriously though. The two of you are my team. No either/or."
"I'm your team? You work for me, Mars."
"Whatever helps you sleep at night." He smiled. She smiled back. Maybe she was a bit whipped to. And maybe if it was a cheesy high school romance flick, somethin'... else woulda happened. But it wasn't. And he couldn't let his mind wander there. So they drank some more, in companionable, easy, gritty, badass silence.
And a cloud drifted off, and there were two little stars in the sky.
