Disclaimer: If you think I am Ms. Rowling, you are out of your bloody mind. Get back to me once you've seen a psychiatrist...
A/n: Something I wrote in about 1/2 an hour. I am an absolutely HUGE fan of the Severus/Hermione ship...so I think that is why I fancied this idea so much...Enjoy:-)
"You are an insolent, sarcastic, bitter bastard Severus Snape! You are insensitive and frankly," she struggled within herself to find a suitable statement, "I don't like you very much," she said with quiet defiance. She recognized it wasn't her most effective insult, but she wouldn't let him know she thought so.
"That's what you said last week. Remember? Afterwards, we were shagging like rabbits, " he said smugly, the grin never leaving his pallid face.
"Well, this time, I mean it!" she replied. She knew she didn't. She loved this man with all of her soul. But he was stubborn anyways. He wasn't just going to leave. And she would win this argument if it was the last thing she did.
"Miss Granger...we both know that I am quite experienced at calling your bluffs..." he said, letting the statement hang in the cool dungeon air for a moment.
"Don't call me that!" she said, but each knew what the other was thinking. They were thinking about 6 years ago, when she had stolen some ingredients from his private stores. He admitted that he had known all along after they were together. Yes, he could call her bluffs alright.
"Stay on the current subject!" she said after a few moments.
"Oh, and what is that? I'll bet you've forgotten the reason this little argument broke out in the first place," he said calmly.
"I do to remember!" she said stalling for time. What was the reason again?
"Recall my statement a few minutes ago, Hermione..." he said almost warningly.
That's it!
"You said that I couldn't cook!" she said triumphantly. That's all she needed to continue the quarrel.
"You yourself have admitted this on several occasions, my dear. And you burnt a Pop-tart for God's sake!"
"But that was really awful for you to say that, Severus!"
"You know what?" he said calmly, standing up, "I'm getting tired of this."
And with that, he picked up Hermione, threw her over his shoulder and began marching down the hallway towards their room.
"Severus Snape! Put me down at once!" She said, punching him in the back and kicking her legs. "Albus! Minerva! Someone! Help me!"
"They can't hear you, love. You and I both know the reason we put that silencing ward around our quarters." he said with a dastardly smile.
Yes, she knew. She couldn't help the sounds that they made when together. Maybe if the entire staff wasn't so damned nosy.
She couldn't produce a suitable answer. Just as he had predicted. He knew this woman like the back of his hand.
When they reached the room, he threw her on the bed.
"You are such a bastard, you know that?" she exclaimed, but this time very playfully.
She was smiling. That angelic smile that melted his heart. In fact, it was the only thing in the world that could. Thinking of how much he loved her, he laid on the bed beside her, and claimed her mouth in a passionate kiss. She returned the kiss with ten times more passion and began to unbutton his shirt.
You can fill in the rest of the blanks.
The next morning, Hermione woke up feeling amazing. Now, what was that argument about again? Oh hell, I can't remember. But I do fancy a Pop-tart...