"Oh come on pop!" I rolled my eyes and we pulled into the familiar run down parking lot.
"What?" Charlie's eyes widened, his expression tried for innocence.
"The diner? Really? I thought we were going for a nice welcome home dinner?"
"It will be nice! What's wrong with the diner? I happen to like the diner!" He placed the car in park.
What's wrong with the diner? Well, let's start with the fact that just like the entire rest of the town of forks, it hasn't changed in about…well ever. It's packed every Friday night, just like this one, with the same faces. The only thing that changes less than the town of forks, are the people who inhabit this place. And let's end with the fact that I'm ashamed to be here. I had effectively ran my too big mouth all through high school, boasting how I would leave Forks and never come back. I would become a successful writer in New York city and never once take even a slight glance in my rearview mirror. Yet, now, here I am, recently divorced, new book failing, and shamefully relocated to the nothing town I had busted my ass to get out of! I think it would be appropriate to say Fuck. My. Life.
"Oh come on Bells, it'll do you good to see some friendly faces." Charlie nudged as I huffed and hauled my sulking behind out of his old police car.
Ah yes, 'friendly old face' number one, Lauren Mallory, top bitchy high school rival, still sitting in her usual corner booth as if we were still seniors and of course still whispering into the ear of Jessica Stanley, about me no doubt, also, just like we were old times.
I was in a time warp, I simply had to be. There was no way it was possible that all of these people were still here, not only still here but still eating dinner every damn Friday night in this dumpy old diner? Forks had to be some cursed black hole, where no one could get out, once you were in, you were destined to rot here.
"BELLY!" A thunderous voice roared from behind the counter, and before I knew it, I was wrapped tightly in the grasp of a giant grizzly bear of a man.
"alkdakjbfdasflkjadf!"
"Huh? What Bells? I couldn't understand you!" Emmett, my should-have-been big brother released me just slightly.
"Can't breathe Em." I grinned up at the same curly black hair and boyish dimples I remembered from high school.
"Oh! Shit! Sorry!" He chuckled, pulled me back and then frowned. "Wow, you look like shit Belly!"
"Thanks Em, great to see you after all these years too." I rolled my eyes, knowing full well that that I looked like hell. But I was supposed to look like hell, I had just survived the worst six months of my life…I am allowed to look like hell damnit!
"I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to be an ass…it's just…well you're too thin, and look like you could seriously use some sleep."
I couldn't help but laugh. Emmett was Emmett, brutally honest, even when you didn't want him to be, but fiercely loyal, and one of my very best friends since kindergarten.
"How have you been Emmett? How are you liking running the diner?" Charlie interrupted, giving Em, a hardy slap on the back.
Running the diner? Wait, what?
"It's good chief," Emmett answered, leading us to an open booth. "Business is good, I've got no complaints."
"Glad to hear it son." Charlie nodded as we took our seats.
"Don't you leave without saying bye Bells." Emmett warned with a wink before returning to the back of the restaurant.
"Since when is Emmett running the diner?" I asked Charlie as we flipped through our worn menus.
"Since his dad got sick last year and couldn't do it anymore." He answered without looking up.
"Sick?" Why hadn't I heard about this?
"Yes, they found brain tumors last year, around Christmas, remember I told you about it."
"Oh…right." I agreed, thinking back trying to remember a conversation that included news that huge, surely I wouldn't have forgotten that?
Dinner was a simple affair, as it always is in the diner. Just the steak, fries and ended with the usual berry cobbler. We had the same waitress that I remember from being a kid, she's of course older now, and insists on reminding me how much I loved the crap cobbler when I was six. Charlie kept the conversation light, but flowing, knowing me well enough to know that if I wasn't talking I'd be dwelling, but still being Charlie and feeling awkward going into anything deeper than the weather, or the trivial crime going down in the booming metropolis of Forks.
Charlie joked with the waitress and paid our bill while I said goodbye to Emmett and reluctantly agreed to meet up with him and the rest of our small high school crew at Fork's tiny pub the next night.
The drive home was quiet, just the static of the radio buzzing in the background, barely drowning out the swishing of the wet road we were driving on. I sat, staring out into the darkness at the familiar houses going by, looking at the lit up windows, trying to imagine what the families inside were doing. It was mind numbing, but it made me feel better imagining the happy lives going on inside the tiny houses, it kept me from thinking about all the things I had wanted, all the things I had, and all the things I had lost.
"Home sweet home!" Charlie announced as we came to a stop outside of my old childhood home.
"Home sweet home." I half heartedly agreed and hurried to swing my car door open and jump out, wiping the one stray tear from my face on the way before he could see.
"The doors open, go on in, I'll get your bags."
"Thanks dad." I forced out the best smile I could and pulled my coat closer to me. The damp cold Washington air would freeze you to the bone in an instant, New York winters had nothing on this.
It was a genuine smile that covered my face when I stepped through the creaky old doorway, just like I had done a million times before. The smell of home engulfed me immediately, cinnamon, boot polish, and Charlie. Glancing around, nothing had changed. The walls were still a pale canary yellow, my mom, Renee's attempt to bring some sunshine into the house. Our little wooden dining table still sat in the corner, with the mail piling up on the far end. Charlie was nothing if not settled and dependable, and the house showed it. My father was a good man, standing there in our small kitchen that fact finally hit me. He wasn't a man who would wake up and decide one day that his wife wasn't enough. He'd never leave. When he said something he meant it, and when he loved you, it was permanent, and I had never loved him more for it.
"Ok kid, I think that's everything, you're room…Whoa!" I damn near threw myself into him and wrapped my arms around him as tight as I could before he could even get completely in the door. "Everything ok Bells?" His voice was concerned.
"Nothing is ok Dad." I sobbed into his chest, the first time I had really cried since all of this had begun. "But I'm glad I'm here."
"I'm glad you're here too baby." His shoulders finally relaxed and he folded his arms tightly around me. "I know it hurts right now, trust me Bella, I know, but it will fade."
We just stood there for a few minutes, father and daughter, him comforting me, and maybe even me comforting him. Tonight, was the first time it had ever occurred to me that Charlie really did know exactly what I was feeling. I was too wrapped up in myself and being a teenager when Renee left to see how it had effected Charlie. But now, now that I was older, and broken it was blazingly obvious, every where you looked in this house, from the family pictures hanging on the walls after all these years, Renee's clothes still in the bedroom closet, and even the hideous yellow walls, my father still loved my mother. He still missed her, and he still hurt.
"I should probably start getting settled in." I pulled away, tears finally dry and with a new appreciation for the man standing in front of me.
"Yeah." He agreed and fidgeted around awkwardly. "There's some new bedding on the bed for you, I hope you like it. I had the sales lady pick it out. Purple is still your favorite color right?"
"Not since I was seven." I chuckled.
"Oh, well ummm…" He fumbled, clearly still not comfortable with the emotion we had just shared.
"It's fine. I'll love it I'm sure." I rolled my eyes and grabbed one of my suitcases and headed up the stairs.
Just like everything else in this house…in the whole damn town, my room hadn't changed a bit. Full size bed on one wall, small desk on the other, closet with clothes from when I was still in high school still hanging in it. But for the first time, probably ever, I didn't mind the stale normalcy of it all. It was somehow strangely comforting.
I made quick work of unpacking a few things, taking a rushed shower and then making up the bed with the simple bedding Charlie had gotten for me. Tomorrow would be my first full day back in Forks, I would need to be rested to cope with just the fact of being back here, and with any luck, exhaustion from all the traveling, crying, and just being here would cause sleep to come quickly, tonight I couldn't deal with the nightmares.
Ok, so this is sort of a test chapter of a story I've had floating around in my head that has recently started nagging me to the point of having to get some of it out. This chapter is a short one, just a simple beginning, but chapter number 2 is already in progress! I have a pretty good outline for where I want this story to go, the how I'm getting there is still a bit fuzzy, but that'll come along. This is of course an Edward and Bella story and I believe if all goes as planned, Edward shall be making his first appearance next chapter. For those of you who have been following along with my other stories as well, first of all THANK YOU! And I promise I WILL be finishing "The Edge"…I've just come to a standstill with it because it is a very personal story, and the emotions in it are hard to get out in a way that does them justice, but eventually I will make it happen!
To those who haven't been following along, welcome! And I hope you'll stick around and enjoy this story with me!
As ever, shoot me a review and give me your thoughts!