It had been her dream to reach the top when she'd first set out with Turtwig.
That had been six years ago. Now a Torterra, he was languishing in her PC; too slow, too many weaknesses and not enough payoff.
She'd picked him because she thought he was cute. She regretted that now – Empoleon was slow but could take a hit, Infernape was fast and hit hard. She'd probably have still found some use for them today if she'd picked Chimchar or Piplup.
The same could be said for the rest of her initial team, the one she'd won her way through the Gyms with. Luxray, Floatzel, Staraptor, Mismagius, Lopunny. Awful movesets, too frail, couldn't hit hard enough. Too average. No planning, no rhyme or reason, a mishmash of what had been available early on.
By the time she was thirteen it started to show, so she planned another now that she knew what she was doing and had access to most pokemon in Sinnoh. With a Ditto a friend from Kanto had traded her for Lopunny she'd painstakingly bred, hatched and reared her brand new team, becoming friends with the Day-Care man in the process. He'd give her odd looks while she cycled back and forth waiting for the eggs to hatch, but was too polite to say anything when he handed her a new one.
Her new team, micromanaged and trained just right, exceeded her wildest dreams. She quickly gained fame she hadn't really wanted and a loyal following of fans who watched all her battles that lucky cameramen had been able to film. She was regarded as one of the strongest trainers in Sinnoh – in the world, some of her fans claimed. It was everything she'd wanted. By fifteen, she'd accomplished her dream.
But, of course, she had to keep going. Everyone wanted to beat her, and that wasn't so bad, because most trainers were little kids who hadn't given up yet to go back to ordinary life. They were easy enough, and it never got old to see her pokemon steamroll someone else's. That was fine. That was fun.
But then there were the others, those her own age or even older. They really terrified her. Even though she was undefeated, the nagging what if, what if in the back of her mind was always there. If she didn't beat someone in a few turns, it grew stronger, as if taking too long on her next move would cause it to manifest into reality. She hated trainers who built teams around stalling or wearing down opponents – the terror would be right there and she had to fight it down. Hit fast, hit hard, that was how things should be done.
Otherwise there was that feeling that here was the trainer who would take her crown, would turn five years into nothing and leave her broken.
She no longer found joy in battles, even from bright-eyed, fresh-faced kids who didn't know what they were doing, like her when Turtwig had been by her side. She was superior, wasn't that easy to see? Why did she have to keep on having to prove herself to these people?
She started rejecting battles, from the kids and from the older ones. She started going out less and less. Finally, she just up and went home one day. She'd had enough. She was good enough, her pokemon were good enough. They went with her, of course. Even if they never came out of the pokeball again, they were her friends and would never abandon her.
She had, without realising it, abandoned them.
Yes, I did scrap my first team in Diamond (not quite the one in here, but close enough) and make a new, better one, with natures and egg moves and Evs and all that jazz. Still have a box full of Ralts to give away. While Torterra wins in the It's A Turtle With A Tree On Its Back, Just Look At It awards, it's still...um...not great. And, funnily enough, I hardly ever use my new super team on PBR's wi-fi, preferring instead to use a different ones it's 'okay' to lose with. (Including a joke one with all level 1s. If you ever see EPIC FROG, that's me).
Pokemon isn't mine, not for profit, etc.