Curiosity Killed The Black

"What's in the box Moony?" interrogated Sirius, who noticed his best friend walking by in the fifth floor corridors, carrying a container.

"Nothing requiring your concern, Padfoot." Responded Moony rather candidly.

"Oh come now, don't be so stale."

"Padfoot, there is a very good reason why you are not to know what's inside this box, besides, curiosity killed the Black."

"Excuse me? What's that supposed to mean?" Questioned a perplexed Sirius.

"It's the same metaphor muggles use only I'm addressing it directly to you, hence the word Black instead of cat."

"(Padfoot begging) Please Moony, no one's around. Whatever is in the box can be a secret between you me. We're mates remember?"

"No offence Padfoot, but taking into consideration what's in this container, I'd prefer if you didn't know, regardless of our friendship."

"What? Wait... It must be sweets!"

"What! No! I swear to God it isn't!" Said Moony anxiously.

"It is sweets isn't it!"

"Padfoot, I assure you there isn't a morsel of candy anywhere inside this box."

"Oh yeah? Open it."

"I'd rather not."

"Well if it isn't sweets it must be a Firebolt broomstick because that's the only other thing you would hide from me. But, seeing as how the box is only about 40 cm wide, I'm thinking it's candy."

"Dammit Padfoot you got me, yes it's candy. And for the record, there are many other things I would hide from you apart from sweets and a Firebolt broomstick."

"Ha! I was right!"

"Yes I know. It's something were both not used too."

"Ha ha I win!"

"Ah, you see, there's where you're wrong. Yes there is candy in the box, however it doesn't mean you're getting any of it."

"What! That's not fair!"

"Yes it is Padfoot, you're just saying that because you want the acid pops."

"Exactly! Wait... They're acid pops! I love acid pops!"

"*Sigh* Sirius, these sweets are going to the hospital wing for all the sick Gryffindors, I can't let you hinder our friends' satisfaction for your own."

"Of course you can, you just won't let me."

"Exactly."

"Fine, suppose one day I happen fall very ill, then would I get some?"

"Padfoot, you're not planning on injuring yourself again, are you?"

(Guilty tone) "Nooooooooooo..."

"Because last time you did you ran your broom into the womping willow just to get a girl to go out with you, and in the end it turned out she already had a boyfriend."

"You know what Moony," Said Sirius defensively. "those five minutes of alone time I had with her were worth my five month stay at the hospital wing."

"I'm sure they were Padfoot." Said a thoroughly unconvinced Remus.

"Very well Moony, you've left me with no alternative. If you won't willingly give me the sweets, I'll just have to forcibly take them from you."

"Sirius, if you so much as draw your wand against me I swear to God I will stun you so hard your dead mother will feel it."

"Right" (draws wand)

"Stupefy!"

(Sirius groaning in severe pain) "Ow, dammit Moony you weren't joking!"

"Sirius, (puts away wand) let me ask you a question. Since when did I ever start joking?"

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