A/N: Okay, so this is just a random one-shot that's completely unrelated to my ongoing story, Alphabet Soup. The exact timeframe isn't really important, but it's about seven months after Haley's death, just as a point of reference. Let me know what you think! Enjoy!
Gambling Man
Aaron Hotchner had never considered himself a gambling man. At least not in the traditional sense of the term.
He wasn't one to go to casinos and waste away his entire savings in one go at a cold blackjack table. He didn't have an addiction to craps or poker or roulette or even the lottery. To the naked eye, he wouldn't be considered a gambling man.
That was only to the naked eye though. Deep down, Aaron Hotchner was definitely a gambling man.
When he'd seen a blonde beauty, he'd gambled and joined the cast of "Pirates of Penzance". He'd been the worst fourth pirate in history, but he'd won that bet. He'd gotten that blonde beauty and the day that she'd walked down that aisle towards him in her white dress, he'd considered himself to be the luckiest man alive.
As life progressed, Haley wanted kids. He wasn't so sure about that. He'd always wanted to be a father, but he wasn't sure how good of an idea it would be, with him traveling all of the time. Plus, knowing what humans were capable of put quite the damper on wanting to bring such an innocent life into such a wretched world.
In the end, he'd gambled and Haley had gotten pregnant. He'd won that hand too. Jack was possibly the single best thing that had ever happened to him. Even on his worst days, one grin from his son and everything seemed so much better.
He wasn't just a gambler in his personal life, but his professional life as well—though, he would be the first to admit that these days, the line between personal and professional was getting more and more blurred.
The time that he and Reid had been in that hospital ER with the long distance serial killer, Hotch had gambled. He'd gambled both his and Reid's lives, not to mention the lives of the others in the ER as well as his relationship with Reid.
Reid had figured out the plan and killed Phillip Dowd before Dowd could kill any more innocent people than he already had. Hotch had come out of that with an even stronger bond—as well as a new respect—for Dr. Spencer Reid. He'd won.
In that Florida State Penitentiary not long after that, Hotch had literally gambled JJ. He'd promised that sexual psychopath that he could smell JJ's hair depending on the outcome of a game of poker. Granted, that hadn't been too big of a gamble, because not only had JJ dealt—JJ was a mean card player—but he would have broken the guy's neck before allowing him to get close enough to smell JJ.
Regardless, he'd won. He'd gotten another body out of Jacob and the team had gone on to figure out the truth behind the matter. He'd won.
He usually won. That much was obvious. He'd be lying if he said he never lost, though. He'd lost plenty of times. Plenty of important times.
Like after Elle's attack. He'd allowed her to come back to the Unit. He'd gambled and let her come back even though he wasn't completely sure that she could handle it. That one, he'd definitely lost. Elle had murdered that man. He may not have any proof—as he'd admitted to her, if he'd had proof, he would have arrested her and he'd meant it—but he knew that she'd murdered that man in cold blood. He'd lost that time.
Hotch, like any good gambler, knew that sometimes you just had to play through a bad hand and go all in on the next one to win.
When Emily and he both left the unit and Gideon was missing, he'd taken one of the biggest gambles of his life. Against Haley's wishes, he'd gambled and gone to Emily's apartment. He'd gambled and revealed how well he knew the brunette en route to talking her into coming to Milwaukee with him.
When he'd gotten back, Haley was gone. He knew then that he'd lost. He knew that he'd lost, but, though it took awhile to get over the sense of that loss, he came to have hope that there was still a win to be had in the future.
It had taken a long time—years —but he'd won.
After Haley left him, he thought maybe he'd lost in the biggest way. Gone bankrupt. He thought that he would never be happy again and that he'd lost his son forever. Bankrupt.
There had been a ray of light through this darkness though. Emily Prentiss. He'd gambled on her before, by letting her onto the team, by asking her to come to Milwaukee, and by beginning to trust her. She'd never let him down yet.
She'd proven him wrong in many ways. He thought she had a political agenda—she hated politics. He thought that she was going to whisper in Strauss' ear—she'd quit. He thought that she was cold and untrustworthy—she'd been there for him every single day after Haley died. She'd been there to help him care for Jack when the boy would cry for hours because he wanted his mother. She'd proven him wrong.
Being proven wrong may have been like losing to some people, but not in this case. Hotch knew that Emily Prentiss was a win. Maybe the ultimate win.
As he stood in front of his door, poised to knock, he knew that he was gambling yet again. He knew that even if he lost this one though, it was still a win because he had her in his life in some capacity, so, even if it didn't go his way, he would be happy.
"Hotch? What are you doing here?" Emily asked, confused when she pulled her door open at the sound of a knock.
"I wanted to talk to you," he said.
"Do we have a case?" she studied him. He seemed nervous—twitchy almost. She'd never seen him like this.
"No…it's not about work," he shook his head.
"Is Jack okay? Are you okay?" she questioned, concern evident in both her eyes and voice.
"Emily. Everyone is fine. Can I please come in so we can talk?" Hotch requested, laying a hand on her shoulder gently. In the past, he would never have dreamed of setting a hand on a subordinate unless he was offering support, but it was different with Emily.
They'd developed a close friendship over the last seven months as she'd been there for him after Haley's death. Over those months, she'd become his best friend. They watched movies, they ate dinner together, they talked—they did everything that best friends did. A comfort had developed between them that allowed him to feel fine with laying his hand on her shoulder.
"Sure, of course, come on in," she nodded in agreement.
She moved to sit on the couch, slightly concerned about what was going on with this man. She'd gotten so good at reading him, but right now, she had no idea what to think. He had an almost wild look in his eye and she didn't want to admit it, but it was kind of turning her on.
She looked over her shoulder to ask if he wanted something to drink when she saw that he was standing by the counter and hadn't followed her any further.
"Hotch…what are you doing?" she wanted to know.
He said nothing, but pulled her over to him and caressed her cheek with his fingers before tucking her hair behind her ear and staring into her dark brown eyes.
She knew what this meant, but she needed him to be the one to cross the line first. That was the only way that she would believe this was actually happening, not just a scene from her dreams. "What are you doing?" she repeated.
"Gambling," he said simply and sealed his lips across her before she could say anything else.
When she sighed into his mouth and relaxed into the kiss and their mouths opened against one another and their tongues danced together, an undeniable truth crossed his mind.
He'd won. He'd won big.
A/N: So basically, I was watching all the episodes on A&E last night and both the episodes that I referenced—Spencer in the ER and JJ in the jail—were on and I got to thinking about how Hotch gambles a lot and this sort of spilled out. Anyway, let me know what you think, but no flames please. I didn't have a beta on this, but I read over it like four times to make sure there weren't any mistakes, but if there are any big ones, please let me know and I'll fix them. Thanks!
Also, for those of you who read Alphabet Soup, I have the next chapter finished; I just need to do one more read through so look for that to be up either later today or tomorrow depending. Have a good weekend everyone!