Okay, I was thinking about posting this in sooner, but sooner never happened so I'm posting it now. This occured to my mind on New Years', while I was talking to a friend of mine, and we were talking about DMC, blah blah, blah. Okay get to reading! Oh and I don't own Devil May Cry.
January 1st, New Years Day
Lady slept rather soundly that night...or so she thought. Dawn broke through somewhere around 5:23 or so, as the light obviously showed when it shone through her dark red curtains. The sunlight soaked her face in warmth and caused her to stirr in bed.
Once the light awoke Lady even slightly, she couldn't fall back asleep. Thus why she kept her curtains closed all the time. This morning, though, a terrible headache accompanied the sunshine. Being it really early, she wanted to at least sleep in for another hour, so she shifted to her left side. She hugged what she thought was her favorite giant dog plush lying next to her, but it was too hard to be a stuffed animal. She ignored it; that is, until her plush turned on its side and snored in her face.
Her eyes immediately shot open and stared at the stuffed animal horrifically. She then shifted backwards ans bumped into another strange object on the opposite side of the bed. She toppled over it and fell off of her bed. The object she fell over also shifted and groaned. She quickly stood up and reached for Kalinna Ann. Lady aimed it at her plush first, as it still made movements and noises. She cautiously walked over to the left side of the bed and slowly reached for the blanket.
As she removed it from the bed, she immediately noticed the back of the creature's head. Silver hair. She denied it at first. She thought, Maybe it's a wig on some bald guy, or possibly I accidentally hooked up with a weird chick, or maybe its--! No such luck; the creature turned on its side once again to reveal who it really was.
Who else but Dante to show up at her apartment. Lady screamed and shot at him along with the rest of the bed. It all went flying and crashed to the ground. Dante ended up crashing into the bathroom wall. As the wall crumbled, he lifted himself off the ground, out of the pile of debris.
Behind him everything in the bathroom was totalled, including her medicine cabinet, which hung loosely on one corner. Everything it had contained lay on the floor: birth control pills, massage oil, a box of Tylenol, skin lotion, tanning lotion (which was unopened), a pair of contact lenses, and... A gasp escaped from her throat. On the floor lay a box of tampons, and a few were scattered about. Dante rubbed his head and brushed himself off. He seen Lady staring at him.
"What?", he asked.
"Step out of there right now, Dante! Unless this missile is going straight up your ass!!", she yelled.
"Geez, what's wrong with you? You were moaning and gasping for me to fuck you in the ass, now you want to blow mine up?", he smiled.
"I won't say it again. Step out of there right n--", she stopped herself. As the dust clouds cleared, she saw clearly saw that he wasn't wearing anything at all! Lady gaped at below his waist. Dante was confused at what she was looking at, so he looked down as well.
"Huh, I thought I felt a breeze.. Like what you see, Lady? You know, we could--"
Lady groaned in disgust, and frantically searched for something to cover him. She threw him the sheet to her bed. Another groan was heard from behind her. The other person stood up and pulled the blanket from its head. Lady scolded herself and then a tiny voice in the back of her mind said, Awesome job bagging both of them! But you're an idiot for not remembering any of it.
Vergil had an irritated expression on his face. He noticed Lady standing a few feet away from him now facing him, and his eyes widened.
"Oh God no...Please don't tell me I commited such an atrocity with a human.."
"...", she slowly nodded her head in reply, her mouth gaping again.
"God...You're over 18, right?"
"...Both of you, get out now!!" She lifted up Kalinna Ann and aimed it at Vergil.
"'Both of you?'", he questioned. He leaned to his left and saw Dante waving and smiling at him. He scowled at his immature younger brother and stood up.
Lady leaned against a weak wall and sighed. "Finally, they're gone.." she looked around her bedroom which was cleaned up of parts of her tattered bed and bathroom wall. "At least they helped clear up all the broken stuff.", she continued talking to herself. She leaned her head on the wall, and then, under pressure, the wall collapsed and she fell backwards. She let out a girly scream.
Vergil, since the fall of the Temn Ni Gru, wa staying with Dante at his shop. He trudged upstairs to his room and dropped himself onto his bed. His body was sore, and his head throbbed with pain, both from last night and the predicament this morning. He tried to gather the memory of last night, but couldn't; he had gotten too drunk to remember. He closed his eyes, and smacked his forehead with his hand. He sighed in irritation at this.
"...I wonder if I was good last night...", he muttered to himself. I'm positive I was. There was no need in thinking such a thing.