Disclaimer I don't own them they belong to Aaron Sorkin Et Al. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note: This story goes along with "The Man I Love" This one is Leo POV of his recovery and all that goes along with it. I know it's cheesy but I like it. Thanks to AJ for reading it for me to make sure I can write coherently. I don't mind if you archive it just let me know where.
"The Woman Of My Dreams"
By: GEM
How long have I been here? I've been here so long I can't remember. One thing that has become very clear to me is that if I didn't have Jenny here with me, I wouldn't get out of here alive. She is my anchor. She is my world. Why she would want to stay with me through all of this is beyond me. She truly is the woman of my dreams. If it Wasn't for her I could be dead right now and if it wasn't for her I wouldn't make it out of here alive.
During the last few weeks that I have been here there were so many time I thought about picking up a bottle or a glass of water and some pills, to make the pain go away but I haven't been able to. I have tried to convince myself that these people here, the ones that are trying to help me, they don't know what I need. I know what I need. I need a drink but I can't have one because now every time I think about having one there is a little voice in the back of my head that says go ahead it won't hurt you but at the same time that is a voice screaming NO! You are better than that you don't need it. I have learned the listen to that voice.
I have found the strength to tell myself no. I have convinced myself that I don't need drugs and alcohol anymore. I just wish that I found that strength earlier. If I had, then I wouldn't have put my family through this unbearable pain. Pain... I hurt my family. Never physically I never raised a hand to Jenny or Mallory and I never will. Jenny is the sunshine in my life. She is my world. Her face is all I see when I talk about my addiction. I will never forgive myself for what I have put her and Mallory through.
Throughout the last few weeks Jenny has been the one thing in my life that I have held onto I have let everything else go. Everything that made me the distant person that I was. The person that I didn't like is gone. She is the only thing I have clung to; she has been my anchor. I can't live without her.
I hear the door open and I turn around in front of the window that I was staring out of. I see Jenny standing in the doorway. She runs into my arms, and I hold on to her. I relax in her arms and she relaxes in mine. She begins to cry, so I hold on to her and rock her until she is calm is my arms. This has been a hard time for her, and it's all my fault I put her through this hell. We are still in each other's arms and we aren't going to let go. We need each other. I kiss her on top of her head and tell her how much I love her. She begins to cry again and I try to calm her. When she finally relaxes in my arms I take her hand and lead her over to the bed we sit down and begin to talk. We talk about everything that comes to mind, but the most important thing to me is that she know how much I care for her, how much she means to me. I tell her I love her, and that I'm sorry for all of the pain I have caused her, even though I know in my heart that sorry doesn't cut it, or begin to express how I truly feel. She looks into my eyes and then kiss me passionately. I don't want this to go away, but I know that it has to after a moment we break apart and she rests her head on my shoulder. She tells me how much she missed me, and how glad she is to have me back. I tell her that I will never leave her again as I kiss her gently on the lips.
We talk for what seems like hours. Holding each other, begin in the same room, this is really what we both want, so the things we are talking about are irrelevant. We just want to be with one another. Finally the nurse comes in and tells Jenny that she has to leave. The statement ripped through me like a knife. Jenny put a tighter hold on me, and I could tell that it had the same effect on her, given her body language. We hold one another, unwilling to let go. A few moments later I loosen my hold, help her up and walk her to the door. We hold each other for a few more moments finally I look into her eyes and kiss her lovingly. She starts to shake she is fighting back tears. She holds onto my hand, as she walks out the door I stretch with her as far as I can before I let go as I watch her go I too, have a tear in my eye.
I'm once again lost in my thoughts. What does she see in me? No that isn't the right question What do I see in her? I see someone who is caring and loves unconditionally and someone who will do anything for anyone. I see the woman I fell in love with. Yes, I put her through hell and she has never stopped loving me, helping or supporting me. She is the same loving and caring person I married. She truly is the women of my dreams.