-1Hola peoples! How was everyone's Christmas ? I Hope Santa was good to everyone. I would also say how was everyone's New Year, but it's actually only New Years Eve. There's like 20 minutes till midnight. Anyways, I've decided to do a one-shot about what it would be like if Naruto and the gang got jobs as waters and waitresses. The story is in various points of view. And I can't be sure that this'll be any good but oh well! This is also my first one-shot, so enjoy peoples! But if I get good responses, I might make it into a story or something. It's up to you readers out there so tell me what you want. Oh! I'm also listening to Fall Out Boy right now, so I'm hoping that they'll help me write better as they're my fav band of all time! (okay, maybe not all time cause I might get a new favorite band in the future but whatever…)
I don't own Naruto.
Naruto's POV
"Hey Naruto!" Kakashi called over to me. Kakashi is our boss. Tsunade however, owns the restaurant.
"Yeah?" I said, popping my head out of the kitchen.
"It's show time!" He said pointing to the door as Kiba changed the door sign from 'close' to 'open'.
All the people that had been lined up to get into the exclusive restaurant, came pouring in. I grimaced. It was 8:00 pm, and when the restaurant opened, it was like rush hour in the morning, on the highway when people were trying to get to work. Except it wasn't rush hour-it was worse. Like imagine the day Halo 3 came out or the iPhone. The rush of people is just freaking ridiculous! And there's only me, Sakura, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Chouji, Kiba, Shino, Lee, Gai and Tenten as waiters, and waitresses. Now you might be wondering why a grown man like Gai is still a waiter. But don't worry, you'll find out soon enough. Asuma is the head chef ( which I find very strange seeing as though he's a chronic smoker and smokes while he cooks. We're always telling him that he'll get fired but he doesn't care.) and Anko is the second best chef there is. Anko's a bit off her rocker but oh well. Tsunade owns the restaurant and her assistant Shizune visits frequently. Kurenai is the valet parker dude that well…parks people's cars. Tenten is the head waitress and is second in command. Lee is her right hand man. The rest of us are amateurs-this is actually our first day working. Neji and Hinata were going to work with us too but since they're rich and all, they really didn't need the extra mula, (like the rest of us do), so they decided to not get jobs here. Ino on the other hand, needs the money, but wanted a job more glamorous so she got an internship at some teen fashion magazine that pays her minimum wage to sharpen pencils and other stuff. And now that I'm done explaining the situation here, lets get back to Kakashi, shall we?
As the people ran in, they sort of trampled Kiba over. You should have seen it! It was so funny! He's standing by the door changing the sign in front of the crowd, and suddenly, he underneath the people, screaming "GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME YOU FRAKING BASTARDS!!". It was a Kodak moment.
"All right people!" Kakashi began, calling us (the waiters that is) over. "The place is packed tonight"-"When is it not?" I whispered to Sasuke-"so let's do our best! Any words, Tenten?" he said looking over to Tenten. Tenten shook her head. "Alrighty then. Lets get to work people!"
"Wait! Shouldn't someone help Kiba?" Sakura asked.
"Oh he'll be fine!" Kakashi said as he began to walk away. Probably to go read his new porn book. "Oh! Tenten's in charge while I'm gone."
"Ehhhhh!" I said. "Where are you going?"
"The new 'icha-icha' paradise book is coming out tonight. I can't miss that can I?" Kakashi said as he walked out the door, stepping on Kiba along the way. I guess he wasn't going to read his dumb book after all-he was gonna go BUY it!………….
Kiba's POV
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I groaned in pain as Kakashi stepped on me, not even noticing I was there. "Watch it!" My uniform was ruined and there were footprints all over me. I think I was gonna be okay, but then, some snot nosed red-haired brat came and started jumping on me.
"Look mommy!" He said. "This guys a door matt!"
"WHAAAAAAAT!?!?!?!!?!?" I roared as he began to scrape off his muddy shoes all over my face. "GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME!!!!!!!"
The little boy sucked in a huge breath and started screaming really fast, "Mommythedoor mattstartedtalkingandsaidabadword!"
Just then, an enraged women came over to me, and picked up her kid off of me. "Thanks lady," I said as I started to get up, wincing from the pain. "You're kid-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! HOLY SHIT LADY!!!!!"
The lady just kicked me in my privates and I keeled over in pain from the blow. "What the hell was that for!?!?" I screamed.
"What's wrong with you? How dare you curse in front of a little child!" She yelled and started attacking me. First she picked me up and put my head in a half-nelson. I was screaming my head off. This lady was strong!
"WHAT IS GOING ON OVER HERE????" Tenten yelled coming over here.
"Oh thank God you're here! This lady's psycho!!" I said, as the lady got off of me.
Tenten looked over to the lady and very calmly said, "Mam, you cant just assault my waiters like that. (Sorry to cut in but-HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It just turned 12:00. Hope 2008 is awesome for everyone! Now back to the story!) I'm going to have to ask you to leave."
"But this waiter of yours"-she paused to spit on my face. "Eeeewww!" I screamed wiping it off my face. Seriously this lady was cocoo! -"Was cursing in front of my 4 year old son!"-she paused again to kick my shin. "Hey!!!!" I yelled clutching my knee. "What am I? Your punching bag? This is freaking waiter abuse!!!" The lady ignored me and continued talking. "Surely after all the trauma my son has been through, I think I should be allowed to stay and be entitled to a free dinner."
"If anyone's in trauma, it' me you effing bitch!!! First I'm trampled all over, and Kakashi walks over me ,then your son decides to use me as a door matt, then you kick me in the balls and start to attack me! I'm in serious pain here!" I argued.
The lady just looked at me with a bemused look on her face. Tenten sighed. "I'm sorry miss. I cant have you putting my waiter in the hospital. I need you and your son to leave." Tenten said, assuming full manager position.
The lady formed a crazy glint in her eye. "Who are you to tell me what to do anyways? You're just a kid!"
"Actually I'm 17 and I'm in charge here mam!" Tenten said getting pissed off that her authority was being questioned, by a crazy lady no less.
"Well then miss manager, how about I leave and sue you and you're little restaurant!" She said with a maniacal laugh.
"On what charges!" I yelled jumping to my feet despite all the pain I was in.
"Harassment of course!" The lady said.
"But I never did anything to you! I could sue you for harassing me!" I said.
"Oh sure you could, but who're the jury gonna believe, you, an angered, teenager, or me-a successful business woman, mother and wife. Whose only crime was trying to protect her son's ears from profane language?"
"Yeah but along the way, you managed to cripple the so-called 'angered teen'. How are you going to account for that?" Tenten asked balling her fists.
"How about we get my husband Ashley to deal with you two!" The woman said.
Tenten and I did our best to conceal our laughter. "What kind of wussy name is that for a guy?" I asked.
"You making fun of my name punk?" An incredibly deep and macho voice said from behind me. I winced. That voice didn't sound wussy at all.
I turned around slowly and choked in a scream. In front of me was a giant-probably 7"2 at the very least! He was the burliest and buffest man I had ever seen. He had a tattoo of his own face eating a skull on his left arm and other various tattoo's all over the parts of his body I could see.. And he had an ear, nose, and lip piercing. "N-no s-sir!" I stuttered, afraid this guy would like…I dunno, EAT me or something!
The guy glared at me before turning his attention to his wife. "What's the matter here Bob?"
"Wait!" Tenten said. Ashley glared at her. "u-umm…w-who's B-bob?" Tenten asked, her voice going small under Ashley's towering evil glare.
"Me of course!" The lady who attacked me huffed. "You got a problem with it?" Tenten shook her head. "Good! And no! It's not short for anything."
Before anyone could say anything else Naruto walked right up to us and get this, said, "Oh hey! Bob! Ashley! Glad you guys could make it!"
Completely forgetting about the situation at hand, Bob and Ashley turned to Naruto and said, "Good to see ya kid!" Ashley said slapping Naruto across the back, causing him to fall flat on his face at Bob's feet. "Yeah! It's so nice to see you Naruto! Thanks for inviting us!" Bob said kicking Naruto in the side. Clearly Bob had an issue with hurting people. "So how's little Regina doing?" Naruto asked getting up and dusting himself off while clutching his side in pain. "Oh he's just great!" Bob said, beckoning over the little red-haired kid that was wiping his feet on my face earlier.
"Hey Naruto!" The kid, whose name was Regina, said. "Hey buddy!" Naruto said crouching down to give him a high five.
Tenten and I looked at Naruto as if he was crazy. "Wait ,wait ,wait!" Tenten said. "Naruto!"
"Yeah?" he asked getting back up.
"You know these people?" Tenten asked amazed.
"Of course. I met them at the movies a month ago when I accidentally bumped into Bob here and she started to kick me. We've been friends ever since!" Naruto said proudly.
"Why do the guys have girl names and the lady has a boy name?" I asked.
"You wanna find out punk? I really don't think you do, cause the last person who asked me that…well, lets just say he's not around anymore!" Ashley growled, his face growing dark and cracking his knuckles. I swear that a thunderbolt just cracked outside.
sweat drops I gulped and said "N-no M-Mr. Ashley."
"Good!" He said pulling back. "Now show us to our seats and take our orders or you'll be in some serious pain…K-k-k-kie-kiea-kieabo!" He roared in my face, spitting all over me. Great. Not only was I in pain, but now I've been forced to serve an illiterate ( he couldn't read my name tag which says KIBA in big bold letters) possible murderer, who'll probably make sure that I go missing if I don't do what he says. Today just isn't my day.
"I-it's K-kiba s-sir! And I-I'll g-go s-seat y-you r-right a-away!" I said.
"W-wait!" Tenten said. I suppose she was trying to save me from my immediate death. "S-shouldn't Naruto w-wait on y-you g-guys since h-he knows you?"
"Nonsense!" Ashley roared. "I'll take Kieabo right here! I have a feeling he won't disappoint me!" Then he crouched down and whispered in my ear, " Won't you Kieabo! If not, we'll just say that I'm very good with knives and making people disappear!"
"Oh crap!" I whispered. I was too scared to even correct him. If I wasn't so scared I would've unleashed my awesome ninja skills on him, but instead I just nodded and mouthed to Tenten, "HELP ME!!!" As Ashley dragged me away……
Tenten's POV
I swear I think I heard Ashley say to Kiba that he was 'very good with knives and making people disappear'. I turned to Naruto and said, "I think you've just let a killer into my restaurant!"
"Who Ashley?" Naruto asked surprised. I nodded as I looked over at Ashley barking orders at Kiba from across the room.
"Naw! No way! Sure he can get a little rough sometimes but he wouldn't hurt a fly!" Naruto said.
"I hope to God that you're right Naruto." I said patting him on his back as I walked over to the other waiters. All of them were here but Shikamaru. "Where's Shikamaru?" I ordered, resuming my calm, cool, and collected manager act.
"I heard him say that he was gonna go take a nap in the kitchen cause this was too troublesome for him." Chouji said while licking his fingers from something that looked like a stake.
I pushed the other waiters aside and walked up to Chouji. "Is that a stake!?" I yelled. Chouji nodded uncertainly as he stopped licking his fingers to look at me. "Ugggh! Chouji! I told you while I was training you guys! YOU CAN'T EAT THE FOOD ASUMA MAKES FOR THE CUSTOMERS!!!!!!" I yelled as I shoved him aside to look at everyone. I took in a deep breath. Calm down Ten. Calm, down. You can't go getting worked up right now. You're in charge and you've got to set a good example for these guys! "Alright people! This may be you're first day here, but Friday is also our busiest night! You all may be rookies, but you've got to take action and get our waiting done!" I began as I started to look at everyone standing in front of me as if I was a general inspecting my troops. "Now waiters! Get in line!" I yelled, and the other waiters just couldn't help but go, "Sir, yes, sir!"
I smirked. "Gai!"
"Yes, sir?" Gai said snapping to attention.
"Front and center!" I said to him in my general voice.
"Yes sir!" Gai said stepping out of the line and walked in front of me.
"Now Gai. I understand that you've been waiting for 5 years now. That makes you the most experienced out of all of us. Now I know the only reason you've kept at this job was because you were jealous that Kakashi beat you to the job of manager and you're hoping to outshine him with your so called 'youthfulness' and dedication-"
"I'M WAY BETTER AT THIS THAN KAKASHI!!!!" Gai yelled cutting me off.
"WHO TOLD YOU TO SPEAK!?!? CERTAINLY NOT ME YOU"RE COMMANDER-"
"Actually temporary commander." Sasuke said cutting me off. "Kakashi's commander. You're more like a captain."
I glared at him but turned my attention back to Gai, "As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted TWICE"- Sasuke sneered, while Gai whimpered-" I may not be your commander, but I'm still your captain, and Lee's sergeant cause he's my second. The rest of you are all officers! I'm still your superior. You listen to me. Now Gai, I know that all you've ever done is wait on people, but tonight I want you to go help Kurenai in the valet parking area. She'll need all the help she can get."
"But-"
"No buts, no cuts, no coconuts Gai! I'm temporary"-I looked at Sasuke as I said that-" commander. This isn't a democracy, it's a dictatorship! And what I say is law! Now go!"
"Sir, yes, sir!" Gai slumped as he saluted and walked out the door to the parking lot all sad and whiny like.
After I saw Gai leave I focused my attention back onto the rest of the waiters. "Attention soldiers!" I said to them. They all snapped upright except Sasuke. I glared him down until he did. "Now, notepads and pens out!" In a frenzy, all their notepads and pens were whipped out. Notepads were a waiters best friend if you didn't have a good memory. "Good! Now! Sakura, tables 2 and 7. Sasuke, tables 1 and 5. Naruto, I'm gonna only give you one table because I think that 2 might be a challenge for you." Naruto nodded then after a second realized he was being insulted. "Hey! I can take two tables just like Sasuke-teme!"
I sighed. Naruto could be very stubborn at times. "Fine, fine. You've got tables 3 and 4. Happy?" He nodded. "Shino, tables 6 and 8. Kiba's already got table 11. Shikamaru'll get tables 9 and 10, once I find him. Chouji, tables 14 and 15. Lee, since Kakashi's not here, I want you to stand at the podium in front and welcome everyone, and check for any reservations. I've got tables 12 and 13. Feel free to wait on other tables not being waited on, as new people arrive. Make sure you've got nice, big smiles on your faces and don't be afraid to be friendly. Remember, the nicer you are, the bigger tip you'll get. Any questions?"
"How come Kiba only gets one table and rest of us get two?" Sakura asked.
"I have a feeling that Kiba will be there all night. Oh and if any of you see the man he's waiting on try to harm Kiba, call the police-STAT! Are we clear?" I said.
Everyone nodded, but Chouji's hand shot up. I nodded at him to speak. "What's up with Kiba's customers?"
I said. "Listen guys. That guy's name is Ashley. The lady is called Bob, and their son is Regina. They're Naruto's friends."
The waiters started laughing except for Naruto and I. "It's not funny! That Ashley guy is like a killer or something! I heard him whisper into Kiba's ear that he's 'very good with knives and making people disappear!'"
Everyone stopped laughing. "Why didn't you kick them out?" Sakura asked.
"I tried, but they wouldn't leave since Naruto invited them and Bob said she'd sue us." I said.
"Only Naruto would befriend a vicious murderer." Sasuke said.
"Hey! Ashley's my friend! He's not dangerous!" Naruto said backing him up.
"So you say, my youthful friend! But if Kiba is harmed you will be to blame!" Lee said.
"Okay so, try to stay away from that family. But if Kiba screams for help, drop what you/re doing and go see what's happening. If it's dangerous-call the cops. Got it?"
They all nodded. "Good! Now remember soldiers, the restaurant is just like a battlefield but with lavish decorations, expensive food, and annoying customers. Now fan out!!!" I yelled at them! "Sir, yes, sir!" they said as they went to go about their waiting duties.
I stifled back a sob, and wiped a fake tear away. "They grow up so fast!" Then I pulled myself together and pushed the kitchen door open……..
Shikamaru's POV
This waiting job is so troublesome! I don't even know why I took this stupid job. Ugh! All I want to do is just take a nap. Maybe I can sneak in a few z's before I have to start working. I yawn. Oh yeah. I can definitely feel the sleep coming on now. Just a matter of seconds before…I fall…asleep………………………………..."SHIKAMARU NARA!" An annoying voice yells out, waking me up. I open my eyes to see Tenten towering over me glowering. "Yes? You're sorta cutting in to my sleep time here boss." I said with a yawn, getting up from my blanket that I threw onto the cold, kitchen floor before lying down. "What are you doing Shikamaru? You're supposed to be out there waiting on people! You've got tables 9 and 10, so hurry up and go take their orders before they start complaining!" Tenten yelled at me.
I muttered the word 'troublesome' before I left the kitchen, but before I left I heard Tenten start chewing off Asuma's ass for smoking while cooking. Oh well………………
Asuma's POV
"Oh come on Tenten!" I said to her as she started to scold me for smoking while cooking.
"I will not come one Asuma! I've had complaints from people saying that their food smells like smoke when they get it!" Tenten said.
I shrugged. "And this is my fault because……..?" I trailed off waving my spatula in her face.
"It's your fault cause you're the one who's smoking! For God's sake! Would you rather Anko become head chef?" Tenten said pointing over to Anko who was expertly chopping up a bunch of vegetables.
"No! Geez!" I said. Tenten smiled and said, "Good, now put it out."
I sighed as I took the cig out of my mouth and without looking, I squashed it against a stove that had cooking oil on it.
"OH SHIT!!!!" I yelled as the cigarette exploded in flames because of the oil. "Someone get water!!!" I screamed. Then of course, since all the other chefs I work with are complete idiots, they poured all the water on me and not the fire in front of them. "Not on him you idiots! The freaking fire idiots!!!!!" Tenten yelled at them.
The smoke started to escape underneath the door and I heard the fire alarms go off. "Handle this situation Asuma! I'm gonna go get the place evacuated!" Tenten said running out the door.
"Water people!" I barked at them. "And not on me the fire!" By now, the fire had spread to the other side of the kitchen.
If I get out of this, I am soooooooooooooo fired……………………………
Anko's POV
Oh that idiot Asuma! I knew his smoking would kill us all! I quickly grabbed the fire extinguisher no one else had bothered to use and sprayed the white foamy stuff all over the place. I had managed to extinguish the fire after 6 minutes of spraying. "Thank God!" Asuma said slumping down onto the burnt ground. Everyone's clothes were singed and the kitchen was virtually useless now.
"Good job Anko!" various chefs said to me. But I was pissed as hell. I could have freaking died and it was all Asuma's fault! I guess the anger got the best of me since I took a burnt metal pan and whacked Asuma across the head, knocking him out, and searing my hands. The other chefs looked at me as if I was crazy and slowly backed away. Can't say that I blamed 'em………
Sakura's POV
"Excuse me, Sakura?" The woman I was serving asked me. "Yes?" I asked in the politest voice I could muster. The lady scrunched up her nose and said, "Do you…do you smell smoke?" I sniffed the air. It did smell like smoke. I looked over to Sasuke who was waiting a table away from me. He looked as though he could smell smoke too. Then all of a sudden, Tenten burst into the room from the kitchen yelling, "EVERYBODY GET OUT!!!!" Just then the smoke alarms went off and the emergency sprinklers went off. Everyone started panicking and making a run for the door.
If you were smart, you would have guessed that there was a fire in the kitchen. If not, you just sat there all dazed like, like the big, burly dude Kiba was serving, Ashley. I, luckily, was a smart person. So was Kiba seeing as how he ran away from Ashley, Bob and Regina, even though Ashley was screaming "GET BACK HERE KIEABO AND TAKE OUR ORDERS!!!" I started to walk over to them since I was a nice person and was going to explain to them that there was a fire. "I"VE GOT A KNIFE IN MY HAND AND A PRETTY GOOD AIM TOO KIEABO!!!"
That was kind of when I stopped walking over to them seeing as how I didn't want to get killed by a homicidal freak who 'knew how to make people disappear', according to Tenten. I'm guessing Kiba didn't want to either as he froze in his tracks, turned around and screamed, then he started running again. Then Ashley did something I didn't think he would, judging by the fact that I always hear that this guy is dangerous…he faltered. "H-hey! Kieabo! Come back! Don't leave us! We're sorry if we scared or hurt you!" Ashley yelled. But Kiba just kept running and shoved people who were trying to leave out of the way screaming, "A murderer is trying to kill me!!"
I looked back at Ashley, Bob and Regina. I thought I saw him wipe away a tear or something. So then I thought, hmmm, maybe the whole bad guy exterior is just an act. Maybe Naruto was right about him.
Yeah, that thought lasted for…oh, I dunno, about a second! As soon as I saw Ashley start to aim the knife, that's when I started running for my life-literally……….
Kiba's POV
Oh crap! I'm gonna freaking die!!! (yeah sorry to interrupt again, but it's now 3:38 am and my older sis want's to go to bed-I share a room. So I'll continue this in the morning….
Okay! I'm back! It's now currently 12:58 pm. On with the story!) I was pretty sure that I heard Ashley say that he had a knife in his hand and a pretty good aim to match. That statement sorta scared the shit out of me, which is why I'm running for my life shoving people out of my way.
I guess I heard right seeing as how before I got out of the restaurant, Sakura yelled out to me, "Kiba watch out!" And when I turned around, there was a steak knife hurtling right at me. It missed my body by an inch, but did manage to pin my sleeve down to the wall. I saw Ashley snigger as he and the rest of his family started to come forward.
And that's when I tried to pull the knife out but it (lucky me) was stuck. No matter how hard I pulled at it, it wouldn't come out. "Oh shit!" I said as Ashley came right in front of my face, with an evil glint in his eye.
"No one gets away from the Killers Kieabo." Ashley said.
How fitting. Ashley, Bob, and Regina's last name was Killer. Bob came over and kicked me in my side-again and said, "Stop cursing in front of Regina!" I whimpered. Then, Ashley whipped out a Swiss army knife and waved in it in front of my face. I gulped. Well, since this is the end of my young, 16 year long life, there were a lot of things I wanted to confess-like the fact that I was the one who 'accidentally' put blue hair dye in Sakura's shampoo last year, turning her beloved pink hair blue for a month.. And just when I thought it was all over, Sasuke walks over all suave like and simply hit's a pressure point in Ashley's neck, causing him to pass out onto the floor and drop the knife.
I breathed a sigh of relief. "How dare you!" Bob said angry at Sasuke as she lifted her foot up to kick Sasuke, but of course Sasuke being the cool bastard that he is, grab's Bob's foot before it makes contact with his body. Then Sakura runs out from behind yelling the most ridiculous battle cry ever, and does the same exact thing to Bob that Sasuke did to Ashley. Then Sasuke drops her foot and Bob falls to the ground. But before Bob passes out she asks, "Who are you?"
"Uchiha. Sasuke Uchiha." Sasuke replies all James Bond like. "Curse you, you bastard! I'll get my revenge on you!" Bob yells before passing out. "Oh give me a break." Sasuke say's.
I, even though I won't admit it, am in awe. The cold hearted bastard just saved my life with Sakura's help. "Hey thanks Sasuke, Sakura!" I said.
"Hmm" Sasuke say's walking out.
"No prob!" Sakura said with a smile. "Now what are we gonna do with you Regina?"
Regina looks all scared like as he says, "Aaaaaaa!Youpeoplejustkilledmyparents!Waaaaaaa!" Then he runs out screaming and flailing his arms around the place. "No! We didn't kill your parents kid!" Sakura yells running after Regina, leaving me still stuck to the wall while they're was a fire going on in the kitchen. The restaurant was now empty.
"H-hey! Guys! Help! Anyone! HELLLLOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" I screamed. No one answered. Oh great! Just my luck!……………………
Anko's POV
I guess I shouldn't have hit Asuma with that pan, cause now that he's awake, he's seriously pissed off. Plus there's a huge welt on his forehead, the size of…like Texas or something! "Anko! I'm you're superior! You CANNOT go hitting me upside the head with metal pans!" He screamed as we walked out the kitchen, to tell Tenten that the fire was out.
"Well sooooooooory! It's not my fault that I was angry that I could've died!" I answered back, clenching my teeth.
But before Asuma could answer back, Kiba, who was for some reason stuck to the wall by a stake knife yelled out to us, "HEY!!! ASUMA, ANKO!!! YOU OTHER RANDOM CHEFS!! HELP ME!!"
We, ( the chefs that is) walked over to Kiba. "What happened to you?" I asked him. He didn't look that great.
"Okay first I was trampled over by like a hundred people! Then a little 4 year old boy named Regina, starts jumping on me and wiping his filthy, disgusting shoes on my face! Then his crazy mother Bob, comes and kicks me in my privates, then starts attacking me! Then she spits in my face, and threatens to sue us! Then her crazy murderer husband Ashley decides to show up and tries to kill me! He's the one who threw the knife at me and got me stuck to the freaking wall! Now could you please help me here before the fire kills us!" Kiba rants.
"Okay, firstly, the fires out-thanks to me!" I started. "And secondly, where are these Bob, Regina, and Ashley people?"
"Well Sakura ran after Regina after he ran out saying that she and Sasuke killed his parents. As for Bob and Ashley, they're right over there!" Kiba said kicking two limp bodies by our feet.
"And ARE they dead?" Asuma asks.
"Of course not! They just passed out-Sasuke and Sakura took care of them!" Kiba replies.
"Oh okay." A random chef replies. "We should call the cops on them."
"Yeah, sure, sure, but GET ME OFF THIS STUPID WALL FIRST!!!" Kiba screamed. I sighed and pulled the knife out. "Thank you!" Kiba said, dusting off his uniform and walking out the door.
"What should we do with these 2?" I asked, pointing at Bob and Ashley.
Asuma shrugged. "Lets just leave 'em. They're not our problem anyways."
"Fine by me!" I said before walking out of the restaurant myself…………
Tenten's POV
I CANNOT believe that the kitchen caught on fire! And on my watch too! Kakashi's gonna kill me when he find's out! I smacked my hand to my forehead and groaned.
"Hey Tenten!" someone called out to me from behind. I turned around. It was Asuma and Anko.
"The fire's out!" Asuma said, once they reached me.
"Oh thank God!" I said with a sigh of relief. "Okay people! Everyone back inside!" I yelled to everyone.
The customers cheered and began to run back inside. Unfortunately for Kiba, he was about to walk out of the restaurant, but was trampled down again by the hoard of people.
"Ooooooooooooooh!" I heard Kiba moan. Poor guy, I thought before stepping on him myself, just for the fun of it………………………
Kurenai's POV
What was that all about I wonder? All of a sudden all the customers ran out of the restaurant and now, they're all running back in. Something must've happened. Oh well. Doesn't concern me.
Just then, a shiny black Cadillac pulled in, and stopped right in front of me.
"Hello!" I said. "Welcome to Konoha's most exclusive restaurant, The Green Leaf. May I park you're car?"
The tinted Cadillac window rolled down, and the person driving it made me go pale. "Yes, you may." The woman said getting out of the car along with her assistant, and dropped the keys in my palm.
I watched the woman and her assistant scour the parking lot, and then set their sights on The Green Leaf, before getting into the car to park it. And before she left, I heard her say to her assistant, "Come on Shizune! I want to give that Kakashi a surprise visit to see how my restaurant is doing!"
Shizune replied, "Yes Tsunade-sama."
If Tsunade and Shizune were here and something is going on in the restaurant, then we are all in trouble…………………………
Sasuke's POV
"Hi. My name is Sasuke. I'll be you're waiter tonight." I said as I walked over to table one after everyone had gotten back into the restaurant. I was really trying my best to smile and be polite to these annoying people. Not that I actually knew if they were annoying or anything seeing as how I've just met them but most people who eat at restaraunts are always annoying cause they always badger their waiters with their stupid requests like, "Can I get a refill" or "I said I wanted NO cheese! Take it back and re-make it!" No lady, I don't want to give you a stupid refill, and I don't care mister if you don't want cheese. You got cheese so deal with it! That's what I would say if anyone told me those things anyways.
The two people I were serving were 2 men who looked like they were about 35 or something and they were obviously drunk seeing as how they kept slurring their words and asking me ridiculous questions.
"Heyyyyyyy Sasssssukkkee!" The one on the left said. "I'mmmmm-hiccup!- Zannnnneee! The dudeee acrossssss frommmm meeee-hiccup!- isssss Matttttttt. Heeeeee justtttt gotttt diiivvvorcedddddd. Soooooo weeee went-hiccup!- tooo the barrrr nearbyyyyy to celebbratte!-hiccup!-Nnnnow we're herrrrrrree!" Zane slurred while Matt slumped in a corner.
I tried really hard to be patient with this idiots. "Nice to meet you Zane, Matt. Tonight's special is cl-"
"Heyyyyyyy Sasssukkke!" Matt said cutting me off. I clenched my teeth. "What is it Matt?" I really needed to take these people's orders so I could move on to my other table.
"Asssssss smellssss goodddd-hiccup!-, riggghtt?" He asked me.
If I wasn't mistaken, I was sure that he just asked me if ass smells good.
"Umm…No….It smells…bad." I told him.
"Noooooo ittt doesn'ttttt! Itttt-hiccup!- smellsssss gooddd!!" Zane screamed, standing up and making a scene. Matt nodded furiously.
"Thatsss whyyyy my wifeeee anddddddd-hiccup!- I gotttttt divorceddddd! I saidddd that it doessssss smell goodddd!-hiccup!- Sheeeeee disssagreeddd!" Matt said.
Personally I could really care less, but if I wanted a nice big tip, I had to agree with the customer. "You're so right guys. Ass smells good." I said. "Now if you would mind sitting down Zane so I could take you're order, now." My patient is thinning here.
Zane sat down, but then al of a sudden Matt stood up and hugged me and said, "Sasukeeeeeeeee!!! My beautifulllll-hiccup!- waiterrrr! I-hiccup!-lovvvvvee you!'
Oh great. Now my customer was in love with me. Joy. "Get off of me Matt, NOW!"
He shook his head and added, "Noooo!"
"Hheyyyyyy Mattt!-hiccup!- I lovvvee himmm moreee!!" Zane said jumping up and hugging me along with Matt.
Then the two of them started to fight over me. Now imagine, if you will, that you are me. Two, bald, fat, drunk 35 year old men, are like… HUMPING you and saying that they love you. Now, I don't know what you would do in this situation, but I, on the other hand, was not having this at all. So I kicked them in their privates. That got them off of me for sure. But instead of them howling in pain, they just started yelling, "I LOVE SASUKE!!" with the occasional hiccup and slurring of words. This disgusting display, most definitely caught peoples attention.
"Umm, excuse me gentlemen," Tenten said coming over, "but you're disrupting my restaurant. Either sit down and be quiet or leave."
"Nooooooo! Noo stupid girrrlll-hiccup!- is gonnaaaa takkke meee awayyy frommm my precious's Sasukeeee!" Zane said, latching back onto me, while Matt nodded and did the same.
I'm guessing I had a look of utmost disgust on my face cause Tenten pried the two men off of me and kicked them out of the restaurant. And I mean literally kicked them out, despite their protests of not wanting to leave me behind. Good riddance to you two ass holes, was all I could say…………..
Chouji's POV
"Umm, excuse me Chouji, but could you not eat my dinner?" The dude I was waiting on asked me.
"What?" I asked.
The dude pointed to the French fries in my mouth. I blushed. I hadn't realized that I was actually picking his food off of the guy's plate and eating it. "Oh, sorry!" I said wiping my mouth with my sleeve.
"It's okay. Try not to do it again though." the dude said a little annoyed. I just nodded at a loss of words………………….
Shikamaru's POV
"Shikamaru!!!!!!" Ino said yelling my name as I walked over. What luck. The one day Ino comes for dinner at this particular restaurant, is the day that I have to wait on her table. How troublesome………………………….
Asuma's POV
"It's a good thing that I convinced Kakashi to have a second kitchen in this place." I said to Anko and the other chefs as we walked over to the 2nd kitchen that was on the 7th floor of the building.
"Oh yeah," Anko began sarcastically," It's great except for the fact that, oh, I dunno, MAYBE IT"S COMPLETELY STUPID THAT WE HAVE TO WALK UP & FLIGHTS OF STAIRS BEFORE GETTING TO THE KITCHEN!!! PLUSS WE"RE LUGGING ALL OUR NOT RUINED HEAVY EQUIPMENT WHILE YOU GET TO CARRY NOTHING!!!!"
I blinked. Anko continued ranting. "PLUS WHAT ABOUT THE WAITERS HUH!? EVERYTIME THEY NEED TO PUT IN AN ORDER, THEY HAVE TO GO TO THE 7TH FLOOR. AND IF THEY HAVE TO CHECK ON THE FOOD OR PICK UP AN ORDER, THEY'LL BE RUNNING UP AND DOWN THE STAIRS LIKE A MILLION TIMES FOR JUST 1 TABLE!!!!"
"That's not my issue! If it wasn't for me convincing Kakashi to even consider getting a second kitchen in case of an emergency, we would've had to close the restaurant till we get the 1st kitchen fixed!" I said.
"It is your issue! You're the one who burnt the place!!" Anko pushed.
I snorted. "Whatever! UPWARD HO! CHEFS!!" I yelled at them. Anko just glared at me. Oh, yeah. Sometimes it rocks to be head chef!………
Shio's POV
"Are those bugs?" my customer asked all wary like.
"Yes." I responded. My bugs were carrying the food over to the table.
The customer looked disguted. "EWW! GROSS!" She said. "That's unsanitary!"
I shrugged. If she thought that my bugs were the only gross thing about the restaurant, she obviously didn't know about the fact that the guy who made the food smoked while cooking………
Tenten's POV
"Okay sir! That'll be $178.56 for your dinner." I said with a smile, once my customer was finished eating. "How will you be paying sir?" I asked in my polite and cheery waitress voice.
"Here." The guy said handing me a silver Konoha Express credit card. I took it. "Alright sir, I'll be right back with you're bill."
The guy nodded and I walked over to the back room, but on my way there, I stopped dead in my tracks. Lee was talking to two women who looked like Tsunade and Shizune- the owner of the Green Leaf! I couldn't be!
I guess it could be, because once they got close enough to me, I saw that it really was Tsunade and Shizune. Oh crap! They picked a bad night to pay a visit. Kakashi was gone. The Killer family were passed out on the ground. Sasuke's 2 customers Zane and Matt were pounding on the glass windows, demanding re-entry to the restaurant. The kitchen was burnt to a crisp and currently the chefs were hauling all their still good equipment to the 7th floor. Which kinda sucked, cause this building was old, and didn't have an elevator. Kiba was still bent out of shape, Shino's customers were grossed out by his bugs, Chouji was eating the food again, and Ino was practically keeping Shikamaru hostage.
I tried to hide but it was too late. "Ahh! Tenten! Where's Kakashi?" Tsunade asked me, walking over, with Shizune trailing close behind.
"He umm… went out." I said.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE WENT OUT!!!" Tsunade asked, her anger getting the best of her.
I gulped. Everyone knew that Tsunade was one strong woman. And no one wanted to be on the receiving end of one of her punches.
"He said he needed to go get the new installment of those books he reads. He left me in charge." I said.
" OH KAKASHI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Tsunade screamed. I gulped again. I would NOT want to be him right now………………………….
Kakashi's POV (he's currently reading his new book, while walking back to the Green Leaf)
"Huh!?" I said. "Why do I suddenly have a feeling of intense fear?"………………………..
Tsunade's POV
I cannot believe that Kakashi just up and left! After what Tenten has told me, this hasn't exactly been the best of nights for some people, like Kiba and Sasuke. Other people however like Asuma and Kakashi should be fired. Oh I can't wait to get my hands on those two!……
Naruto's POV
Wow. Tsunade can get VERY angry! All us waiters and chefs are here in front of her, waiting for Kakashi to arrive. As soon as Tenten told Tsunade everything that happened tonight, she punched Lee's podium down and destroyed 2 tables, causing the people sitting on them to shriek and run out of the place very scared.
"Yo!" A cheery voice said from behind us. We all turned to see who it was. And to no one's surprise, it was Kakashi reading his new book with a wide smile on his face. Shocker………..
Tenten's POV
After Tsunade chewed off Kakashi's and Asuma's ass, we decided to close the restaurant early tonight. Not that it mattered. It was only 10:49 pm and the Green Leaf Usually closed at 11 pm on Fridays. So we basically closed only 10 minutes early. I don't think anyone really cared anyways. Kiba, for one was glad to leave before he was hurt any further. But Sasuke had to be surrounded by a bunch of us in order for him to leave the restaurant safely because Zane and Matt were still outside yelling out their claims of love for Sasuke. "Stupid ass holes." I heard Sasuke mutter.
Ashley and Bob regained consciousness. Regina, who afterwards never seemed to leave Sakura's side was reunited with his parents. But when Ashley started to threaten us about where 'Kieabo' was, Tsunade took care of him. I really would've hated to be him at that moment when Tsunade punched him out cold.
Ino wouldn't let Shikamaru go, which surprised me. I always thought she was a Sasuke fan girl, not a Shikamaru stalker, but whatever-things change, people change. Thankfully, Kakashi wasn't fired-I don't think I could have handled another night like that in charge again. Gai is still sour about being made a valet parker person but oh well. When I'm in charge, I can't handle him and his gay bursts of 'youthfulness.' As for Asuma, he was demoted, and Anko was made head chef, much to her delight and his sourness. I have a feeling that Asuma won't be smoking near the food anymore while Anko is his boss, because as the say, "Revenge is sweet." As for me, I'm still the captain and temporary commander, and what I say is still law. But man! Was tonight crazy or what? But hey, it's all part of the job that we waiters and waitresses like to call waiting………………….
WOW! That was VERY long! 16 pages actually. The story itself is 7,394 words long. That is THE longest chapter I've EVER written. I've still got lots of more ideas so if you guys want, I could make this into a story or something. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this! Read and Review! Happy New Year!! Arriverderci!