Lingering Effects

Ann B Harding

Nick's thoughts during his conversation with Kelly Gordon in Still Life. Thanks to PJS for the beta...

"You're coming around Hodges." Nick replied to the lab tech in the same tone the other man had just used with him. The man was great at his job - but that didn't stop him from being on the biggest pricks in the lab. Still it was fun razz the man from time to time. And right now, Nick took his pleasures where he could.

He strode through the hallway, wondering who his visitor was. As far as he knew his family was all back in Texas and most of his friends in Vegas worked here at the lab; the few that didn't weren't the sort that would just stop by work for a chat. Particularly not when they knew there was a big case at the lab - and given the coverage the case had received in the media this was most certainly count as a big case - even if wasn't exactly the case they thought they had when they had been called to park. So just who would be coming here to see him?

"I have a visitor?" he said as he approached the woman at the desk. The dark haired woman - a temporary replacement for the vacationing Judy who normally manned the desk - nodded and indicated towards the seats on the far side of room.

How the hell did she get out and what was she doing here?

"Kelly?" he asked. He wasn't sure why, other then maybe a small deep seated wish that she wouldn't know what he was talking about and tell him her name was Susan or Judith or something - anything - else.

She didn't though. Instead the woman who's father had kidnapped Nick and buried him alive six months ago in some twisted attempt at revenge, just gave a small wave - greeting him as if they had once been good friends. Friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time. "Hi," she said. She did seem a bit uneasy, but since the last time she'd been in a police station she'd been under arrest and being charged with the crime that sent her to prison in the first place that was understandable. Or it could just the station itself. It tended to make most people a bit - even those who hadn't done anything - uneasy. It was only the people who worked here who viewed this place as just another building.

"You…you got out." Stupid, stating the obvious but it was the only thing he could think of to say. He had almost managed to convince himself that seeing her at the crime scene the other day had been a mirage. That it hadn't really been her. He'd only caught a glimpse of her at the park, so he could have just seen someone who just looked like her. Just another crime scene gawker. But there she was, in the flesh. Out of prison and just sitting in the reception area of the crime lab as bold as you please.

"A couple days ago," she said. She paused for a few seconds, seeming to consider whether to continue. "The parole hearing broad…liked my smile," she said as if that explained it all.

He gave a small smile himself - not sure what else to do. He had no idea what to say next. What was he suppose to say? What did she want from him? Why was she here?

Finally after silence that seemed to go on forever but could have only a few seconds at most, he found his voice. "You know," he began- trying to sound casual - like she really was an old friend he had unexpectedly run into. He was surprised at how normal he sounded. "I thought I saw you at a crime scene the other day." Again a small part of him was hoping she would deny that she had been there… and he must have mistaken her for someone else.

No such luck though. "You did."

"I did?" he repeated. Why couldn't he find anything else to say to this woman? He was the one who was supposed to be so good with people so why couldn't he find something, anything to say to this woman?

She nodded. "Just checking it out," she explained. But she did not continue to say what she checking out. The park where the supposed kidnapping had occurred? The police? Had she been watching a possible crime unfold? Had she checking him out for some reason? Did she want revenge for what happen to her father? Did she somehow blame the CSI lab for what her father had done to him and tried to do to the as many police as he could?

There was another long pause. While Nick was not exactly the ladies man that everyone thought he was, it was rare that he was at such a loss for words around a woman. But Kelly Gordon unnerved him in a way no other person ever had. Even Amy Hendler - the woman who held him at gunpoint in her living room or Nigel Crane the stalker who had tried to kill him had not have the same effect that this woman did. In those circumstances he had been able to think of something to say, he had tried to find a way out. It wasn't her fault, but just being there with her…standing in the same room with her, breathing the same air, brought back those horrific hours he had spent in box barely big enough to fit him. Hours he had spent not knowing if he were going to live or die. Memories he had worked hard to bur….rid himself of or failing that at least learn to live with. He was still working on the later.

Kelly stood. "You know how when you came to see me," she began as she advanced towards him. Nick willed himself not to flinch run or show her any sign of weakness as she came closer and closer. "About when I get out…" She continued to move closer. Invading his space. Getting in his face. "Not taking it with me…"

She stopped and stood right in front him, trapping him. Now he couldn't escape even if he wanted to. He couldn't trust his voice so he just nodded.

"I've been thinking a lot about that. I wanted you know."

What in the hell did that mean? Was it some sort of veiled threat or was it an attempt at some sort of "thank you"? Normally he considered himself a good judge of character, but right now he couldn't concentrate on the usual things he paid attention to when someone was talking to him. People lied to him all the time - it came with the job - but he could usually tell when they did. There were small hints, things people didn't even think about such as vocal tone or where he/she was looking that gave them away. But it was hard to think about paying attention to such things when his heart was pounding so hard he was surprised everyone in the lab couldn't hear it.

"Ya all right?" He cringed slight as his voice cracked at the end of the question more to break the silence then any concern for her welfare.

She smiled. For some reason the smile sent chills up and down his spine. Was it the smile that caused those chills, or was it who was smiling that caused the shudders? "Perfect" she said.

And then she was gone. The visit lasted less then five minutes… but effects would linger on and on. Like the smell of perfume or the stench of body in advance decomp, it would linger. For how long he did not know, but he wanted it to go away. He just wanted to go back the way he was before that damned coin flip in the hall. The way he was before those twenty-eight hours last May.