A/N: This is a weird story, or as some might perfer to call it, insane. If anything in this story offends you, I deeply apologize.
"Damn it," Jou burst into the house, slamming the door loud enough to rival a thunder storm. "That asshole," he yelled.
"Katsuya… what's wrong?" Shizuka came running followed by Anzu and Mai. Tonight they were having some kind of girl's night which might explain the excessive amounts of makeup Shizuka was wearing. Jou gave Shizuka an odd look before replying.
"Seto canceled our date… again," Jou sighed. "Some last minute business meeting or some crap like that." He sat down on the couch and sunk into it, sulking. "It's like… what? The fifth time this week?"
"Oh don't exaggerate Jou," Anzu chastised.
"I wish I was," he muttered to himself.
"Seto does have to run a company to run, Jou. It's not like he doesn't want to spend time with you," Shizuka tried to comfort her brother.
"Maybe," Jou scoffed. "I just can't take this anymore. How do girls get their boyfriends to pay attention to them?" He asked, not really expecting an answer. Mai smiled at this.
"They tell them they're pregnant," she said cockily. Jou jumped up from the couch and covered Shizuka's ears.
"Don't use words like that in from of her! You'll give her ideas!" He yelped. In unison, the three girls roll their eyes. Then, as if Jou had just understood what he heard, he paused, deep in thought. A smirk crept onto his previously solemn face.
"That could work…" Jou said to himself, an idea beginning to form in his head. The girls exchange confused looks as Jou walks off to his room.
"Um, does Jou know that he's a guy?" Anzu asked no one in particular.
"Yeah…." Shizuka said, still staring after Jou. "I think so anyway," she added as an afterthought.
"And does he know that guys can't get pregnant?" Shizuka's eyes went wide with concern.
"You think we should tell him?" She asked, biting her lip absentmindedly. Mai shook her head.
"Maybe later," Mai said before shooing Shizuka upstairs to go finish her makeup. They'd worry about Jou's lack of sex Ed later.
"Jou, what are you doing here?" Seto had just arrived home from his business meeting to find Jou sitting in his living room.
"What? Not happy to see me?" Jou said, idly flipping through some book.
"No, of course not. It's just… you weren't waiting for me were you –" Jou cut Seto off.
"No, I just got here maybe fifteen minutes ago. But that's beside the point. I've got to talk to you," Seto sighed tiredly. He knew what was coming.
"I'm truly sorry about canceling our date, Katsuya. Really I am. You know I'd rather be with you than any–" Again, Seto was cut off.
"That's not it," Jou said, putting the book facedown onto the coffee table.
"What?" Seto looked surprised for a moment before looking slightly anxious. "Are you okay, Jou?" Jou didn't say anything which only caused Seto to become more worried. He walked over to the couch where Jou was sitting. He sat down next to him, resting his hand on Jou's shoulder. "You can tell me."
"You might want to sit down," Seto looked around.
"I am sitting down Jou." Jou looked up at Seto before forcing a short laugh.
"Oh, so you are." He looked down at his hands nervously. "Seto, I'm…." Jou drifted off.
"Yes?" Jou turned to face Seto.
"I'm pregnant." He whispered. Suddenly Seto felt wide awake. He stared at Jou trying to decipher what he just heard. Perhaps it was some kind of code, or maybe he just heard wrong. Yes, that must be it.
"Wait, did you just say you were…" Seto wrestled with the word. "Pregnant?" Jou nodded sheepishly. Seto just sat there stunned.
"And I'm keeping it, Seto. I'm not getting an abortion." Jou stood up. "I don't care what you say; I'm not aborting our baby…." Seto gaped at him.
"I'm not telling you to have an abortion. I would never suggest aborting our baby." Seto stood suddenly. "Wait, what am I saying?" He shouted to himself before turning to Jou. "You can't be pregnant. It's not possible. It just doesn't… work that way." Seto rambled on. Jou's eye's narrowed.
"I don't care if you don't want to raise our child with me, but don't dare refuse to acknowledge that this child is yours. And it is too possible… I believe you were there when…" Jou paused, blushing slightly. Seto just stared, hardly daring to believe his ears.
"Look, it's been a long night and I know you're tired. I'll let you sleep on it. We'll talk tomorrow," Jou said, picking up the book from the coffee table. "This is for you," Jou handed the book to Seto.
"Goodnight," He said, giving Seto a quick kiss before leaving the room. Seto watched Jou walk out of the room before looking down at the book in his hand – The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads-To-Be.Setotook a deep breathe in an effort not to panic.
"Seto?" A tired voice questioned from behind him. Seto turned to see his younger brother. "I heard shouting. What happened?" Mokuba asked. Seto managed to find his voice from wherever it had disappeared off too.
"Jou's pregnant," Seto deadpanned.
"Seto," Mokuba said rather amused. "Do you need me to explain to you about the birds and the bees?"
"Hey Shizuka, where's Jou?" Shizuka had answered the door to see Honda and Yugi standing there. "We're supposed to go to a movie together," Yugi told her. Shizuka ushered them inside.
"Well, he's kind of…. detained," She tried to explain and well, failed. Although you couldn't really blame her for it's not exactly everyday you have to tell people that your big brother is pregnant.
"What do you mean detained?" Honda asked suspiciously. Before Shizuka could even respond Seto appeared from the hallway looking dazed and confused.
"Shizuka, do you have any Oreos in the house? Jou said he wants some," Seto said not even pausing to acknowledge Yugi or Honda.
"There should be some in the pantry," Shizuka told him before returning to Honda's question. Knowing that it would be impossible to explain she opted for the easy way out. "Why don't we go talk to Jou?" She suggested. Not knowing what was going on Yugi and Honda wordlessly followed Shizuka to Jou's room.
Jou was sitting on his bed propped up on his pillows. There was an abundant supply of magazines next to him and enough junk had been moved from his dresser so the TV on which he was watching some bizarre reality show could sit there. There was also a bag of chips, a packet of crackers, and a glass of chocolate milk on his bedside table.
"Oh, hey guys," Jou said when he saw them. "What's up?"
"Well, we were going to see a movie, remember?" Honda began.
"Yeah, about that…" Jou looked apologetic. "Something's kind of come up."
"Why don't you tell them what's come up?" Shizuka asked although it came out more as a demand than a request. But before Jou could comply with the demand Honda had picked up a book that had been resting on top of the TV.
"What's this?" He asked, holding up The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads-To-Be. Jou laughed nervously.
"Oh, did I forget to tell you, I'm pregnant." There was a moment of silence, then:
"Have you lost your mind?"
"Yes, he has." Shizuka told Honda before turning to Jou. "I mean it Jou; look what you're doing to poor Seto. I think he actually believes you…" Yugi, who had been trying to put two and two together for the past few minutes, finally came to some conclusion.
"You told Seto that you were pregnant?" Yugi asked slowly. Jou nodded, grinning until Shizuka gave him a reprimanding glare.
"And he believed you?" Honda gaped. Jou shrugged nonchalantly.
"I guess," he started. "When I told him I had morning sickness he got me come crackers because that book told him it would help," Jou said pointing to said book in Honda's hand.
"That's just weird," Honda shivered, feeling slightly disturbed whilst Jou just nodded cheerfully.
"So, how long do you plan on being…. Pregnant?" Yugi asked.
"I don't know," Jou sighed. "I could get used to this kind of treatment." Jou said leaning back and resting his head in his hands.
"Well, you're going to have to gain some weight then," Yugi commented only to receive something short of a shriek from Shizuka.
"You don't have a problem with this?" She shook her head mumbling something about boys and their mental problems. "Jou, you do know you will have to tell Seto the truth sometime."
"Not necessarily," Jou started. Before he could finish Honda interrupted.
"What? You're not going to have a baby, are you? That would be…. genetically impossible… personally insulting…I mean…. Guys can't have babies, right?" He seeked reassurance from Shizuka.
"No, they can't." Shizuka comforted Honda. He sighed, relieved.
"You could always tell Seto you had a miscarriage," Yugi suggested.
"Yugi!" Shizuka scolded. "Don't give him ideas…" Before Shizuka could say anything more a voice from behind them interrupted.
"I've got your Oreos," Seto stood in the doorway carrying a grocery bag. "There weren't any in the pantry so I went to get you some," Yugi, Honda, and Shizuka all went silent and waited for Jou to react.
"Thank you Seto," he said sweetly. Seto walked into the room and sat down on the bed next to Jou, slipping an arm around his waist. He dropped the bag on Jou's lap. Jou opened the bag to see not Oreos but a small box.
"That isn't Oreos," Honda point out.
"Well thanks for stating the obvious," Jou said sarcastically. He looked up at Seto for an explanation.
"Oh I must have forgotten about the Oreos," Seto muttered to himself absentmindedly. Jou didn't move.
"Aren't you going to open it?" Seto asked.
"I… um…. I guess…" Jou picked up the small box and opened it carefully. Inside laid a silver ring. It was plain except for a small inlayed blue stone.
"It's a promise ring," Seto explained. "I was planning on giving it to you on our anniversary but now that you're pregnant I thought it would be kind of fitting to give it to you now." Jou stared at Seto and then at the ring. Jou bit his lip nervously.
"Um, Seto?"
"You do like it, don't you?"
"Yes, of course I like it. But Seto…" Jou took a deep breath. "I'm not pregnant." Everyone in the room held their breath and waited for Seto's reaction. Jou hung his head in shame and waited for Seto to berate him for pretending that he was pregnant this whole time. But nothing came.
"Oh, I know that," Seto murmured as he took the ring from the box and slipped the ring onto Jou's finger. Jou could see the matching ring on Seto's own hand.
"But then….why did you…" Jou stammered. Seto ignored him.
"I'm sure you're hungry," Seto said changing the subject. "Why don't we go get some lunch?" He suggested. He stood and headed towards the door. In the doorway he paused, turning around.
"But next time Jou," Seto gave Jou a devious smirk. "It's my turn to be pregnant."
Thank you for reading.