Domestic Mission Part 1

Het, Tony/Pepper

I realize how ridiculous this is. I have no problem flying at an altitude of thousands of feet, in little more than an animated tin can.

I can stand in a hail of bullets and not even flinch as they hit the suit.

I can even withstand a direct bazooka hit (hell, I'll put myself right in the path of a shot, just to test the suit's capability).

All this, I can do without even breaking a sweat.

But telling Pepper Potts how I feel about her? Yeah, that terrifies me.

When I'm alone, I laugh at myself about it. Maybe because it's the only problem I can't solve by rewiring, or re-engineering, or (re)inventing. I can't fix it with my hands (well, I could, but Pepper would probably deck me if I tried that way), so the solution doesn't come easily.

Mind you, I have made some changes on that front. The last girls I took to bed were just for show, cover for a mission. I haven't slept with anyone since I came back from Afghanistan. Problem is, while I know Pepper has noticed this change in me, she probably has no clue what it really means.

And why should she? I flirt with her all the time, I always did, and it never meant anything. Why should she think now is any different?

I sigh, then I straighten up a little in my chair as the familiar tapping of her heels comes down the basement stairs, getting louder and louder.

I wish I knew what to do about this. Yes, she almost kissed me that night at the gala, but I know why she stopped herself. Because she's not sure that I'm really a new me. Yeah, the whole boss-employee thing is a pain, but would anyone really dare to say anything? No, I think it's just that she doesn't want to be another notch on the Stark bedposts. She doesn't want to risk herself, unless it's more serious than that. I can understand that. So how do I let her know that it is serious?

She's standing in front of me now, rattling off a list of engagements and meetings, none of which I care about. If it has nothing to do with the suit, or with her, I just don't give a fuck anymore.

I have to do something about this. I have to take a cue from this whole Iron Man thing. From the moment I got back from my imprisonment, I didn't question that I had a job to do, a penance to carry out. I didn't think, I just threw myself into it. Maybe that's the way to go in this situation, too?

"Pepper," I cut her off, before I can stop myself.

"Yes, Mr. Stark?" she asks, smiling a little. Waiting for me to brush off the list of to-dos, probably.

"You and me. Dinner. Tonight." God, awkward. If anyone was watching this, they'd probably be laughing their asses off. Tony Stark, suave ladies' man, turning into a fumbling teenager in one-point-five seconds flat. Good thing Jarvis has no emotion, or he'd be in hysterics right now.

She blinks, startled. "Mr. Stark-" she starts.

"It's Tony, Pepper," I correct her. "And no, this isn't a business thing. It's personal. I had lots of time to think, when they had me prisoner in Afghanistan. Time to think about what was really important in my life." I pause, letting it sink in.

"I think you can see the changes in me," I finally make myself continue. "I think you saw it that night, when we almost…well." My courage fails me for a second. Thrusters have stalled, gravity has taken over. Going down…

"Please, just say yes, Pepper," I finally say, when the silence gets too thick.

For a few moments, she just stands there, her face unreadable, and I try to figure out the probability of salvaging this. Maybe if she gets really angry or embarrassed, I can just pretend it was some kind of poorly-conceived prank? That's not how I want it to go, but it's better than having her walk out on me.

But then she smiles, and I think this might actually not be a total crash and burn.

"Alright," she says.

Relieved, I can't resist adding: "And don't worry. I won't expect you to put out until at least the fourth or fifth date."

Now she's smirking. "That's very thoughtful of you, Mr. S-Tony. Laying out the ground rules like that."

Yes, I do think I might actually not have screwed this up too badly, if I do say so myself.