A/N: Wow I've been gone a long time! It's good to be back! I originally wrote this for a friend who was having issues with a Zelda game, but she said I should post it so here it is. My first HunterxHunter fic! Yay!
Disclaimer: I do not own HunterxHunter or any other characters/related items, though I'm working on buying myself a place in the Zoldyck family. I also do not won any Zelda game (which is mentioned in this fic).
EMBRACE YOUR FATE
Part 1: Hisoka Asks for Help
A large and rather clichéd grandfather clock struck three in the morning. A loud knock interrupted the silence of the night. Pins at the ready, Illumi Zoldyck opened his door to find his friend-who-wasn't-really-his-friend-because-that-would-make-him-a-hypocrite-and-if-there-was-one-thing-that-he-was-not-was-a-hypocrite-but-for-ease-and-convience-he-called-a-friend-even-though-he-was-more-a-close-aquaintance, Hisoka. Though Illumi couldn't quite put his finger on it, there was something different about him. He had a crazed look in his eye, was foaming a bit at the mouth, and was twitching slightly. All were normal signs of being Hisoka. Perhaps he'd dyed his hair a new color and Illumi, not being a morning person, was too tired to notice. Or perhaps he'd got a nose job or something . . . Or maybe it was the little blue fairy that was floating by his shoulder. Yes, that was probably it.
Hisoka grabbed the assassin by the collar and pulled him close. "Kill it," he snarled hoarsely.
"Pardon?"
Hisoka began to shake him. "You're an assassin right? WELL KILL THIS STUPID LITTLE FAIRY THING THAT KEEPS FOLLOWING ME AROUND!"
Illumi stared at the "stupid little fairy thing". Though he couldn't see any facial features at all, he surmised that it was staring back at him. Then he thought it stuck its tongue out at him, though he wasn't sure. He gave it a death glare.
"Apart from being rude, it doesn't seem to be doing any harm. I don't see the problem."
"I'll tell you the problem, this stupid thing keeps following me around and-"
"Hey listen!" piped the fairy. "You need to go fight Jabu-Jabu!"
Hisoka's eye twitched. "It keeps saying that. Over, and over."
"I still don't see why it would be a pro-"
Hisoka began to shake Illumi violently. "GOD DAMN IT, IT'S DRIVING ME INSANE!"
Illumi resigned from pointing out that if Hisoka were any more insane he would be a fangirl; he had a strong feeling that if he did so he would die, and would have completely wasted his last words. Instead he reached out a finger and poked the fairy.
"Why don't you kill it?"
"I tried. But IT WON'T DIE! Look!" Hisoka whipped out a card and started madly slashing at the fairy. Nothing happened.
"See?"
"Fine. But I'm charging my usual fee."
"Whatever. Anything to get rid of it."
Illumi took out one of his pins, and threw it at the fairy. The pin whisked right through it. Frowning, he took out a smaller pin and threw it with the aim of an expert right where he surmised the fairy's jugular vein would be. The fairy proved resilient.
"You needa go fight Jabu-Jabu!"
"WILL YOU SHUT UP YOU GOD DAMN FAIRY!"
Suddenly, a memory wiggled up out of Illumi's brain. It settled down into his consciousness, and began to play.
Illumi slowly walked down the halls of the Zoldyck mansion. He paused for a moment as he heard his brother Killua's voice from a crack in a door.
"SHUT UP YOU GOD DAMN FAIRY! YOUR MOTHER WAS A HARPIE! YES! DIE! DIE! DIE! I SLICE YOU UP AND EAT THE PIECES! MWAHAHAHAAAAAA!"
Illumi blinked. "Hisoka?"
Hisoka looked over from trying to strangle the fairy even though it had no neck. "What?"
"I don't know how to kill this thing, but I think Killua might. Go ask him."
Hope welled up inside Hisoka and he gave Illumi a warm and fuzzy grin. Illumi was scared.
"Thank you, Illumi." He turned to leave. "Oh, by the way, you're coming with me." He grabbed Illumi's wrist.
"Wait what? Why?"
"Because if this thing tells me to go fight Jabu-Jabu one more time I'm going to jump off a cliff."
"And this is a problem because?"
Hisoka turned to look at him, shock on his face. "Illumi! I though you knew me better than that! I'm not going to commit suicide like every other average Joe! This is me you're talking about! There has to at least be a silver dueling pistol involved." Illumi decided that this statement was worthy of actual emotion with actual Mexicans, so he rolled his eyes in a Mexican manner.
A few alleyways later . . .
"You needa go fight Jabu-Jabu!"
"THAT'S IT!"
"HISOKA! REMEMBER THE DUELING PISTOL!"
"Oh. Right. You know any good gun shops?"
"You'll have to wait a while if you want a silver one."
"That's crap."
"I do know a place with some great gold ones."
"NO! It must be silver! Silver is so much more dra-"
"You needa go fight Jabu-Jabu!"
"GAHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Stay tuned for Embrace Your Fate Part 2: Killua Kills Free Willy