Disclaimer: I do not own them, unfortunately Dick Wolf does. This is femslash, A/O. Please review. All mistakes are mine, please forgo any inaccuracies with medical or legal jargon.

Post Season 11 to date.

Chapter 1

It had been a couple of months since Olivia had requested a new ADA for the squad. Even though, they had professionally worked out their differences and were working well together again with Alex as their ADA; the personal relationship between the two was still strained. Before the attempt on Alex's life that sent her into the Witness Protection Program, Alex and Liv were friends, good friends, even best friends. Liv was still hurting from the lack of communication on Alex's part when she returned home to New York. Olivia tried contacting her old friend but her phone messages were never returned.

For a Friday afternoon, the squad room emptied pretty quickly. Detective Olivia Benson had no plans for the evening, nor the rest of the weekend for that matter. She had plenty of paper work to catch up on and since she was on call this weekend, she might as well spend it at work. It was too quiet. The normal hustle and bustle was non existent. She pulled open her desk drawer and rooted through her purse to retrieve her iPod.

She popped the ear buds in and search for something old school and rocking. 'Skynyrd! Perfect.' She thought to herself when she decided on the collection of songs from the southern rock band.

She was now sailing through her paperwork at a good clip; by 8pm she was nearly done. 'Looks like I won't have to come in tomorrow unless we catch a case.' Every so often she would bump up the volume. It was so loud she did not hear Alex's heels clacking down the hallway. Alex didn't notice that Liv had the ear buds in when she walked up behind Liv greeting her hello and placing her hand on the Detective's shoulder.

Luckily Alex was now to Liv's side as Liv shot up from her chair shooting it backwards on its wheels.

"Jesus Christ! Alex, you scared the hell out of me!"

"I'm sorry, Liv. I didn't know you had ear phones on. I'm sorry."

Alex went to retrieve Liv's chair while Liv turned off her iPod and took a deep breath as she started to stack up the DD5's she had been working on.

"I was on my way home and wanted to stop by and see if the search of Raymond Phillip's place of business turned up anything. I guess nothing since everyone seems to have gone home." Said Alex.

"Yeah, no dice as far as physical evidence, but we did find some paperwork on other properties. We won't get the info on additional real estate holdings until Monday so the Cap sent everyone home."

"So why are you still here?"

"I had no place better to be, so I thought I would catch up on my never ending pile of paperwork."

"Well, I have a better offer. Come have dinner with me?"

Olivia didn't immediately respond. She was still upset with Alex about not contacting her after her release from the WPP. She could work with Alex professionally but was not certain if she wanted anything more, rather if she could bare there to not be anything more from Alex. For no one knew it, Olivia had not even really admitted it to herself; but the blond ADA always held a special place in Liv's heart. She had never given any other person permission to take up residence in her heart the way Alex did. She hadn't been involved with a woman since her college days. She now only dated men; but preferred women…actually one woman. Liv felt for a long time that there would never be anyone out there for her; that was until she met Alex only to realize that Alex would probably never feel the same. It was torture for Liv. First of all Alex is straight, second blue blood and blue collar don't mix.

"I don't know Alex."

"Why not?"

"Surely you've got something better to do or someone better to hang out with on a Friday night."

"If I did, why am I here asking you? Liv, please. It's been a long time since it was just you and me. I'd like to at least get back the friendship we had before…before my life went to hell in a hand basket."

'At least? What does she mean by at least??? Thought Liv.

"Mario's? My treat." Added Alex.

Liv debated internally. She didn't want to put herself out there to be hurt again. If she renewed her friendship with Alex it would get her hopes up; hopes for something that would never be.

"I don't think it's a good idea Alex. So much has happened."

"I feel I owe you for an explanation."

"Explanation about what Alex?"

"About why I didn't return your messages when I came back."

One dinner thought the detective. Maybe that will give me the closure I need to put her out of my heart for good.

"OK." Olivia reluctantly agreed.

Liv straightened up her desk and they exited the building to hail a cab. Twenty minutes later they were seated at Mario's in a corner booth in the back. Alex ordered a glass of wine and was surprised when Liv ordered iced tea.

"You don't want any wine?"

"Not tonight."

They slipped into general conversation that lasted through the entire dinner. Alex had not opened up yet and it was starting to get on Liv's nerves that she hadn't as promised.

"Liv, do you want dessert? My treat, remember."

"What I want Alex is for you to explain, like you promised, why didn't you call me when you came back?"

Liv could see the expression on Alex's face change. Alex reached for wine glass and took a sizeable swallow of wine.

"Liv, no one can understand what I went through. I had three different identities. Each time I was moved, I had to learn a new background history, dates, places and new occupation. I was a home body. I only went out for work and errands. I turned down every offer for dinner or a movie, even a drink after work with my co-workers. Each time I was moved I lost another piece of myself, of Alexandra Cabot."

"What about your insurance adjuster you told me about when you came back for Connor's trial?"

"I lied. I didn't want you to know what was happening with me. Part of me didn't want you to see the facade of the ice queen cracking and see me as weak; the other part of me knew that if I said anything that I wouldn't be able to hold it together, not in front of you. I had to stay strong for the trial."

"Alex, why? We were friends, close friends. I don't make friends easily, but you were one of the lucky few that got in. If you can't show weakness in front of your friends…"

"I know, Liv. When I found out I could come home, I was making plans in my head. Who I wanted to see, what I wanted to do as far as my job; I had it all worked out. I was going to live my life on my terms and be damned the political implications. I was going to go back to the DA's office if there was a spot for me and I was going to reconnect with my friends, meaning you and the rest of the 1-6. When I got back to New York it hit me, the world had moved on without me. Elliot had another baby, you were dating that publisher, Casey had my old position and I basically mourned my mother all over again. Even though I was home, I felt lost."

'Political implications. What is she talking about?' Thought Liv.

Alex was trying to keep it together. She wanted Liv in her life. She never told anyone or Liv how she really felt about her. Alex had come out to her parents when she was a teenager. They were upset at first because of how difficult life can be for a gay woman, but supported her none the less. She remained out all through high school and in college. Once she started in law school and had set her sites on the DA's chair, she went back in the closet. Her near death experience caused her to rethink her priorities. Now that she was back, she didn't care if she got the DA's chair or not. All she wanted now was a stable life, a family with someone to love and that someone was Olivia Benson.

Alex's hand was wrapped around her wine glass. Olivia reached to take Alex's hand in hers.

"Alex? It's OK. You're here now."

"I just didn't realize it would be so hard. I fell back into old habits. That's how I ended up engaged to a man I didn't love."

Olivia bristled at the mention of Alex's ex-fiancé. She remembered hearing that Alex had gotten engaged and how much it hurt to know that Alex would be getting married.

"But you didn't marry him, right?"

"No, but I still hurt him. It was then that I went into the therapy. I needed help in getting my life back and my head screwed on straight."

"And is it?"

"Is it what?"

"Screwed on straight, your head?"

"It is. Finally, I know exactly who I am and what I want out of life. I am going to do everything in my power to get it, come hell or high water."

A smile came across the detective's face. She pointed to the ADA.

"There she is; that's the Alex Cabot I know and love. Welcome back Councilor, welcome back." Said Liv raising her glass to Alex.

Alex returned the sentiment and they clinked their glasses. They now ordered dessert and the rest of the meal was light hearted banter. Like it was before…before Velez. They finished their meal and hailed a cab. They shared it back to Liv's apartment; Alex asked the cabbie to wait while she walked Liv to the door of her building.

"Liv? Thank you for tonight."

"I'm glad I took you up on your offer."

Liv had decided that if all she would have with Alex is friendship, then that would be enough. She would just push aside her love for the blue-eyed ADA and just be her friend.

"Well, enjoy the rest of your weekend Detective and if I don't see you before then, I'll see you on Monday."

"You too, Councilor. I had a good time tonight."

"Me too, good night, Liv."

"Night, Alex."

Liv stepped inside her building's door and watched until Alex was back in the cab. Liv watched it pull away. She sighed deeply, then hit the stairs to her apartment hoping to work off some of the sexual tension she had been feeling all night. As soon as she was inside her apartment, she made a bee-line for the shower and a cold one at that. After her shower she pulled on a pair of boy shorts and a tank top and slid into bed. To her surprise, she slept completely through the night.

Over the next few weeks, the ladies began spending more time together; a lunch here, dinner there, a movie or a trip to the Met. Things were going well. They both felt that their friendship was about back to where it was before Velez. Even Elliot, Liv's long time partner noticed a change in her demeanor. She seemed happier.

It was just before lunch, Alex thought she would take a chance and see if Liv would be available for lunch. She entered the squad and scanned the room. No Liv, but her partner was there.

"Detective? Is your partner around?"

"Hey Alex. Yeah, she is up in the crib."

"It a little early for cat naps isn't it?"

"Well, yeah, but hers is drug induced."

"What are you talking about?"

"We had a lead on a potential witness in the Davers case; this local punk who spends most of his days on a street corner selling crack. He and his entourage made us as soon as we walked up and they all spread out. Liv took off after our witness; one shoved past me knocking me to the ground. I let him go, so Liv had a lead on me. By the time I caught up to her in the car, she had our guy cuffed and was walking him back. I pulled over so she could put him in the back seat. She had stepped off the curb and he shoved her back and tried to run away. I saw her go down, she screamed at me to get the punk which is what I did. He only got 20 feet or so. When I got back to the car with him, Liv was sitting on the curb. She said she twisted her ankle."

"No break?" Asked Alex.

"No, I called for a patrol car to meet us at the hospital to bring the punk in so I could stay at the ER with Liv. The doc said it was a bad sprain. She is on crutches for two weeks and has physical therapy to do. He gave her some pretty powerful pain meds. He said that over the next 48 hours the pain will get worse before it gets better."

"What is she doing back here?"

"You know Liv. The only reason she is in the crib now is because she fell asleep at her desk and started drooling over her DD5's. Cap had me carry her up to the crib. Doc says she needs to elevate the ankle and ice it and he doesn't want her by herself for the first few days until she has gotten used to the crutches. I'm hoping she'll still be out of when its time to go home. I can carry her to the car, hopefully get out to Queens and get her settled at my house before she wakes up."

"You have a house full Elliot. Why don't I stay with Liv? That way she can be in her own apartment and in her own bed?"

"You have work tomorrow; Kathy is off tomorrow."

"I'm not scheduled for court. I just have paper work to do and I can do that from Liv's apartment just as well as in my office."

Elliot thought for a minute. He knew his partner. She would want to be in her own space and alone; one out of two ain't bad.

"OK. You know she'll fight us on this?"

"I know; but I can be just as stubborn as Detective Benson."

"I'll head home and pack a bag for the weekend. I'll meet you at Liv's.

"Alex, you'll need to stop by the store. When Liv was sick a few weeks ago, she was living on takeout. The only thing in her frig was a jar of mustard and an apple; at least I think it was an apple…it was growing things." Said Elliot as he gave Alex his spare key to Liv's apartment.

"OK. I'll see you in bit."

During the cab ride back to her apartment, Alex called her boss about working from home tomorrow. Once there, she quickly changed into jeans and a sweater. She packed a bag to last through the weekend. She gathered her toiletries and added them to her bag. Once back in the living room she gathered her brief case and laptop, then headed out the door to the garage. She placed her belongings in the truck of her Mercedes before exiting the garage towards Olivia's neighborhood. Along the way she stopped at the store and pick up the necessities as well as items for a few meals for the weekend.

She lucked out to find a parking space in front of Olivia's building. She took up her belongings first and then went back to retrieve the groceries. She settled her things out of the way and got started on dinner. She figured that Liv would not want anything heavy; so it would be chicken and rice soup.

Back at the 1-6, Elliot was ready to head home. He made his way up to the crib and found his partner still asleep in the same position he had left her hours before. He was glad her foot was still elevated. He walked over and kneeled by the bed. He brushed the hair from her eyes and picked up her hand stroking it.

"Liv, hey…come on. Time to wake up."

She stirred slightly and started to roll to the side; the side with her sprained ankle. That brought her completely awake and in pain. She had to take a minute to catch her breath.

"El?"

"Hey, you ready to go home?"

"What? How? Why am I in the crib El?"

"You fell asleep at your desk; Cap had me bring you up here. So you ready to go home, partner?"

"Yeah, I need to stop by the bathroom first."

"OK. Do you feel steady enough to make it down the stairs on your crutches?"

"No."

"Come on. I'll help."

Instead of carrying her like he did before, he just gave her support on her bad side while she used the rail on her good side and he toted her crutches. Once downstairs, she made her way to the bathroom while Elliot got their coats. He retrieved her gun and badge from his locker; since she had fallen asleep, he couldn't lock them in hers. He grabbed her purse from her desk drawer and met her outside the ladies room door.

"Ready?" Asked Elliot as he helped her with her coat.

"My gun?"

"I got it and your badge. I put them in my locker after I took you upstairs. There in your purse. Come on Gimpy; your chariot a waits."

They made their way down to the motor pool and got in their sedan. Once Olivia saw that they were not headed to Queens, she drifted off to sleep. She wanted to be home in her apartment. She didn't need to be taken care. They reached her apartment, Elliot followed behind her with her purse and he opened her building's door. Thankfully the elevator was working. She prayed that is continued to work for as along as she was on the crutches. She didn't fancy the thoughts of climbing the steps to her apartment with a bum ankle and on crutches. They stepped from the elevator on Liv's floor and caught a whiff of an aroma. Someone was cooking.

"Mrs. Meloni must be cooking again. She makes the best baked spaghetti." Said Liv.

As they got closer to her apartment door, the smell was getting stronger.

"That's weird." Said Liv.

"What?" Asked Elliot.

"Mrs. Meloni's apartment is over there and that wonderful smell is stronger of here." Said Liv as she fumbled with her keys unlocking her door.

Once the apartment door was open, there was no denying it. The wonderful smell was coming from inside her own apartment. She turned back to her partner with a pensive look.

"El?"

Before Elliot could answer, Alex came from the kitchen drying her hands in a dish towel.

"Hey, you're home." Said Alex.

"Alex? What are you doing here?" Asked Olivia.

TBC…