Gold Diggers

by Twilight Goes To Hollywood

Three gorgeous models move to NYC to find rich husbands. Is money really the only thing on their minds? Will true love win out in the end?

Subject/Email Header: Twilight Goes to Hollywood 2018 Contest

Title: Gold Diggers

Summary: Three gorgeous models move to NYC to find rich husbands. Is money really the only thing on their minds? Will true love win out in the end?

Pairing: Emmett x Rosalie; Edward x Bella; Jasper x Alice

Rating: T

Word Count: 8996

DISCLAIMER: This story is based on the movie, 'How to Marry a Millionaire' and crossed with characters from the Twilight books and movies. The author does not own any publicly recognized entities herein. No copyright infringement is intended.

Rosalie Hale and her friends are just starting out their modeling careers. It was the reason she moved to New York City. Well, it wasn't the main reason.

No, that reason was simple; the main purpose was to find a husband. But not just any husband. That could be achieved from anywhere in Small-town, USA. She wanted a wealthy husband. The richer, the better, and what better place to find one than the Capital of the known Universe, the Big Apple.

Rosalie went in search of what she needed to snag her big fish. A swanky apartment on the upper east side; after all, it takes money to attract money. Rosalie didn't have any money, but that didn't mean she couldn't live like she had money.

She and her two friends Bella and Alice pooled what money they had and sublet an apartment. The rental agent told her the guy who owned the apartment wouldn't be back anytime soon. He was on the lamb for tax-evasion. So, all they needed to rent the place were first and last months rent. Their combined money was enough to cover that. She looked around the stylishly furnished apartment, complete with Grand Piano. They would have to work their plan quickly because how they planned to pay the next month's rent was anyone's guess.

All three of the women had the beauty to attract any eligible bachelor they chose, but Rosalie was the brains of this operation. Those other two dimwits didn't have the brain the size of a pea, combined.

There was Alice. An absolute bombshell but dim as a burnt-out light bulb. Then there was Bella, this chick was drop-dead gorgeous if it for those darn coke bottle glasses. They actually wouldn't be so bad, if she'd keep them on her face. She took the saying 'Men don't make passes at girls who wear glasses' literally. So, when she wasn't walking into walls and door frames, she was liable to walk smack dab into the man of her dreams and not even see him.

Rosalie paid the rental agent the sum required, and immediately went to the phone and called Bella. "We're in!" was all she said

"I'll be there in 10," Bella replied and hung up the phone.

Precisely 10 minutes later, Bella was at the door. She walked in and immediately tripped over the step in the foyer.

"JEEZ, Bells, can't you keep those lookers on long enough to see where you're going?" Rosalie scolded. "You certainly got here fast, did you take a taxi?"

"Aw gee, Rose, you know I hate wearing 'em," Bella said ducking her head. "I didn't have enough money for a taxi. I had to get the Cadillac people to demonstrate the new car of theirs again."

"The one with the gold trim? The one I took had gold trim," Rose explained.

"Was it gold? I don't know. I didn't have my specs on because of the driver, you know," the half-blind girl said.

"So, tell me, can Alice pull it off?" Rose asked.

"Well, let's find out," Bella replied as she picked up the phone and dialed.

"Hey Alice, we're in. How much money do you have?" Bella asked the woman once she answered the phone.

"Hey Bells, I've got a quarter?" Alice replied to her friend.

"Perfect, do you think you can pick up lunch?" Bella asked.

"Sure, I think I can manage that. See you in a bit," Alice said and disconnected the call.

About 30-minutes later there was a knock on the door. Rosalie opened the door, and in walked Alice followed by a very handsome, dark-haired man. Rosalie took one look at him as if he were a bug. He was wearing some sort of tweed sports jacket with wool patches on the sleeves. His collar was open, and he wasn't wearing a necktie, even though he was quite young and incredibly handsome.

"This is Mr. McCarty. I met him at the cold cut counter, Alice explained.

"It was amusing actually, I was just in for some pastrami and coleslaw when I heard Ms. Brandon say she only had a quarter and they wouldn't let her write a check." He was quite friendly, and you could tell he was quite smitten with Rosalie. Rosalie was attracted to him all right, he was big and all brawn, with a cute baby face, with the most amazing dimples. Rosalie cut him off flat.

"Well, thank you so much, we'll take it from here," Rosalie told Mr. McCarty in a cold tone.

"Would you like me to put these in the kitchen?" Mr. McCarty asked.

"No, I don't think so, you can just sit them there," she pointed to a small table right next to the door. She then ushered him to the front door.

"I thought maybe I could call you sometime and ask you out," the handsome man said, as Rosalie pushed him out the door.

"Why don't you give us a call next week," Rosalie rudely told the guy.

"But I don't have your number."

"It's okay, we're in the book," Rosalie said as she slammed the door.

"But I don't know your names," the man yelled through the door. He was ignored. McCarty walked to the elevator.

"Dames!" he huffed, as the elevator doors closed. Once in the lobby, he hailed a taxi that took him straight to the McCarty building. The door attendant greeted him by name as he entered the building.

Meanwhile back at the apartment. The girls grilled some franks, opened a bottle of champagne as Rosalie described in detail how to work the plan she had in mind.

"You see girls, a gentleman you meet at the cold cuts counter, is simply not as attractive as the one you'd meet, I don't know, say the one you'd see at the meat counter at Schaller and Weber, or the mink department at Bergdorf Goodman's," Rosalie explained.

"Well, I thought he was very nice. I thought he might have lunch with us," Alice said as she took a bite of her hot dog and sipped her champagne.

"Look, the first thing is, the gentleman callers have got to wear a necktie. Not like the gas pump jockey that just left out of here," Rosalie told the girls with a sour tone in her voice.

"Is that what he was? But how do you know?" Bella asked.

"Because I attract them like flies. Never met one yet that didn't send me swooning. I married one once. The minute I said 'I do' he never did a lick of work. Then he stole my TV and gave it to some waitress. When I asked him about it, he hit me!"

"Well I'm surprised you'd ever want to get married again," Alice said, giving her a pitiful look.

"But don't you see, that's the beauty of this whole thing. I'm going into this using my head, not my heart. I just need one fat juicy bear," Rosalie said.

Over the next three months, they end up hocking almost every stitch of furniture in the apartment, starting with the beautiful Grand Piano. The only thing left are the beds and a small card table and four chairs.

In the meantime, Rosalie received three phone calls from Emmett, asking her out to dinner. She turned him down each time. Finally, she told him to lose her number.

However, every night, Alice comes back with some jerk off she's met in Duane Reade Pharmacy. Rosalie swore, if Alice came back with one more shower cap, loofah sponge or bottle of shampoo, she was going to scream.

Just as she finished that thought, Alice walks in and introduces another chump, no doubt another one she's picked up in Duane Reade's

"Girls, this is Mr. King.," Rosalie never looked up from her solitary game.

"Royce, this is Bella Swan and Rosalie Hale," Rosalie kept right on with her game.

"I met him in the Mink Department at Bergdorf's," Alice finally said. Suddenly that card game wasn't entertaining anymore.

"Mr. King it's a pleasure to meet you," Rosalie said offering him a charming smile.

"Mr. King is from Dallas, Texas," Alice told the girls.

"Oil?" Bella asked.

"A little oil, but mostly stock," Royce told the girls.

"Like stocks and bonds?" Bella asked again.

"No, my stock is white-faced Herford cattle," Royce explained.

"Oh, you mean like cows," Bella giggled.

"Well Mr. King, won't you please sit down," Rosalie offered.

"No, I'm afraid I must be going, but please, do call me Royce. I was just telling Alice, I am here in New York on a convention, the Cattle and Oilmen Association. I would love it if you three beautiful ladies would accompany me this evening," Royce charmingly asked them.

"Will we get to meet some of the other's" Rosalie asked. She really didn't care, she planned to slip the noose on this steer and lead him home. She just wanted to make sure the other girls weren't left out.

Oh, of course," Royce assured them.

"All oil men?" Bella asked.

"Some are into oil, others, cattle such as myself, a few bankers as well. But don't worry girls, they aren't all crotchety old men like me," Royce said only half-jokingly.

"OH, NO! Get Out! Not at all!" the girls clamored all together, while in their minds all three were thinking: CHA-CHING!

"Well, we'd be delighted. What time should we be ready?" Rosalie finally composed herself enough to ask.

"I'll send a car for you girls about 7:00 PM. Now if you'll excuse me, ladies, it was a pleasure to meet you all, and I will see you tonight," Royce said before exiting the door.

'Ya, did good kid," Rosalie told Alice, patting Alice on the back.

"Yeah?" Alice asked as she started unloading the shopping bags.

"Yeah, Rosalie reaffirmed.

About 5:30 the girls started getting ready. By 6:45 they were all dressed in their best cocktail and evening dresses. Rosalie wore a red form-fitting evening gown with a plunging neckline that showed off her best assets, her size 36DD's, her 24-inch waist, and 36-inch hips. Her long blonde hair was swept to one side, and her eyes were done with just highlight, a dark liner, and mascara, and she wore ruby red lipstick.

Bella in a royal blue cocktail dress that stopped just above the knee, to show off her best assets, her long gorgeous legs that went on for miles. Her dark brown hair was done up in a chic chignon, and her makeup was flawlessly done in a smoky eye to play up her warm chocolate brown doe eyes and a pale pink lip.

Alice was the shortest of the three, but still statuesque, though she still had body-ody-ody, her bubbly personality was what stood out more. She wore a strapless number in soft gold, that showed a little more thigh, to make her legs look longer. Her little pixie cut hairstyle was done in soft finger waves and pin curls, she wore 6-in stilettos that matched her dress to make her look taller. Her makeup was done in a bronze and gold for the eyes, with a shimmery taupe lip.

The girls went downstairs where a stretch Mercedes limousine awaited them. They were driven to the Waldorf Astoria Hotel, where the dinner was held. They were met at the door by Royce. He was accompanied by two more gentlemen. Royce reached his hand out to help the ladies exit the limo and tucked Rosalie's arm around his. Rosalie gave him a brilliant smile.

"Ladies, I'd like to introduce you to Jacob Black, he is an oil man like myself, but from the middle east," Jacob held out his hand for Bella. Bella extended her hand and Jacob brought her hand to his lips for a kiss. Bella was charmed, even if she couldn't see that the bastard wore a patch over one eye.

"This is James Hunter. He is in the fur trapping business," Royce introduced the gentleman to the ladies. None of them were really impressed, but Alice asked.

"Do you mean like Mink and Chinchilla? James rolled his eyes.

"That's right little lady," James replied. Alice's eyes twinkled with all the fur she imagined herself wrapped in.

Each gentleman took their lady and escorted them to a separate table in the private ballroom. Bella, only being able to follow the black tux, got turned around when she started following one of the waiters. When Jacob noticed she hadn't kept up, he sought after her and grabbed her by the arm and lead her to the table. Once they were seated, they fell into a comfortable conversation, all about Jacob. Nothing Jacob talked about was under three hundred billion dollars. He told Bella how he'd love to take her to Saudi Arabia with him on his next business trip. Bella had absolutely no idea about any of the things he was talking about, but everything he said, Bella knew she'd hit the jackpot.

"Is there a Mrs. Black?" Bella asked.

"I'm single, and I live in New York. I hope that clears up things for you?" Jacob stated as a matter-of-factly.

"Clear as a bell," Bella replied.

Alice, on the other hand, was on the date from hell. This guy was the crotchety old bastard Royce warned them about.

"Are you married?" Alice asked.

"Married? I'm probably the most married guy on the planet. Do you know how many women were at my house when I left tonight?" James growled.

"I can't say as I do," Alice replied rolling her eyes.

"My wife, her sister, who's divorced, and I must say I don't blame the guy one bit. Their mother that's at least 110-years-old if she's a day. An aunt and three more women I didn't even catch their names," James said with a scowl.

"Well I'm not accustomed to going out with married men, and if I'd had time to ascertain the situation beforehand, I don't know if I'd accepted," Alice told him quite disgruntled.

"This is all quite innocent isn't it?" James asked.

"Well if it is, I can't say I've fallen into similar circumstances," Alice huffed.

"Well, I've figured out how to get away from all the hoopla going on in my home. I have a lodge up in Maine.

"OH, I love lodges," Alice told him, batting her eyelashes. James looked quite pleased with this information.

"You do?"

"Simply ADORE EM," Alice sing-songed.

"Are you saying you'd like to see mine?" James asked.

"Well, I was speaking more figuratively," Alice said trying not to sound too eager

"Because I'm going to mine next Friday," James told Alice

"Simply ADORE'EM," Alice sing-songed again.

In the meantime, Rosalie is getting to know her fellow at a different table.

"So, tell me Royce, are you here in New York alone," Rosalie asked.

"No there are a few of us that came up from Texas, along with their wives. Most of the wives went to see a Broadway show, but you will meet some of the others. Jane must have seen 5 shows in the last three days," Rosalie was visibly taken aback by this information. It didn't go unnoticed by Royce her change in demeanor. He thought he'd better clear this up quickly.

"Jane is my daughter," Royce said.

"Oh really!" Rose perked back up to her beautifully cheery self. "And Mrs. King?" Rose asked.

"My dear sweet Vera passed away some years ago," Royce explained.

"Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss," Rosalie was genuinely sincere.

"Oh, it's quite alright my dear, it's been many years now. I didn't really start feeling the loneliness of being a widower until the last few years. I had the children to keep me company. But now they're grown; my son Alec is married and moved away. Jane is engaged to be married in a few months. Now the house just feels so big an empty. I guess that's why I'd taken to traveling so much. I think I've visited every continent on the planet. Last year I chartered a yacht and sailed around the world. But to tell you the truth the only cure for loneliness is human companionship," Royce said, telling his story to Rosalie

"Well ain't that the truth," Rose concurred.

Rosalie noticed Alice get up to go to the ladies' room. "Would you please excuse me, Royce, while I freshen up," Rose excused herself. They stopped by Bella's table on the way, knowing she couldn't see her hand in front of her face.

"Meet us in the ladies' room," Rose whispered in Bella's ear.

"Well if you want to know the truth, my guy is a real yawn," Alice confessed once they reached the ladies room.

"Yeah, he looks like it. He doesn't even look single to me," Rosalie stated.

"He's not," Alice confirmed.

"So, why are you wasting your time with him?" Rosalie scolded.

"What else have I got, unless you'd like me to dump him and join you and your friend," Alice said quirking her eyebrow at Rose.

"You do, and I will punch you right in the nose right here in this fancy hotel," Rosalie told Alice with a scowl. Just then Bella walked into the ladies' room. The girls waited, they figured it would take her about that long before she put her glasses on to find her way.

"So, did you two get a look at my guy?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, he's quite a looker for a one-eyed guy," Alice told her.

"One eye? Is that all he's got?" Bella asked scrunching up her face.

"For heaven's sake, Bells. Why can't you keep those cheaters on long enough to see who you're out with? He could've been an ax murderer, and you wouldn't even see the ax. Couldn't you even tell he was wearing a patch over his eye?" Rose couldn't believe this bubblehead.

"I thought maybe somebody popped him a good one and he had a black eye," Rose rolled her eyes and let out a huff. "What exactly does he do, again?"

"I honestly couldn't tell you, I didn't understand a word he said, all I know, he hasn't mentioned anything under a billion dollars.

"Well Royce doesn't mention his money, he just refers to it like a true gentleman," Rose boasted.

"All mine talks about is what a rotten family he has. But we haven't ordered anything under $25 a portion, Alice stated. "But I'm going up to his lodge next week," Alice told the girls.

"Why would you do that? I thought you said he was married?" Rose asked.

"He is, but that doesn't mean I can't find someone else once I'm there," Alice told her. Rosalie scrunched up her face and rubbed her temples. She was getting a headache trying to figure these two dimwits out.

"Well, we'd better get back out there before they fly the coop," Rosalie said, and the two ladies left Bella to finish freshening up her make up. Once Bella checked herself out in the mirror, she placed her glasses back in her purse and walked smack dab into a wall trying to leave the ladies room.

The ladies had a wonderful time with their fellows. They ate, had a few drinks and danced before the men bid them goodnight.

That night, Rosalie dreamed of thousands and thousands of head of cattle. Rows and rows of oil wells and shopping in the best jewelry store money could buy. While Bella dreamed of flying on Jacob's solid gold private Lear Jet to Saudi Arabia. Once there, the Sheik gave her handfuls of gold and Jewels.

"You've got to be shitting me!" Bella exclaimed. Jacob explained that it was a middle eastern custom to bestow riches on the guest.

"Well tell him I said thanks, and I'm just wild about the customs of the middle east!" Bella told Jacob.

Alice just dreamed of a hot roast beef sandwich with plenty of mustard.

Over the next week, Rosalie, Bella, and Alice went out every night with their guys. On Thursday, the girls got a call for a modeling gig at Bergdorf Goodman.

That same day, Emmett McCarty called Bergdorf and ordered a private fashion show of the latest resort wear. He told the manager he was shopping for an aunt. A young type aunt, around 25-years old and asked if he knew a model by the name of Rosalie Hale. The manager told Emmett he did and asked if he would like Rosalie to be included in the show.

"You bet your ass I do and make sure her roommates are included too," Emmett told the manager.

"Excellent, Mr. McCarty. I will have it arranged," The manager brown-nosed.

Friday morning and the ladies were at Bergdorf Goodman's, bright and early. While they were dressing, Alice told the other girls she was heading to Maine with her guy to an Elks Lodge convention but wasn't sure if she should go because she wasn't really feeling well. They all told her she should go, maybe she'd get lucky and find a nice guy while she was there.

Once the show began, Alice was the first one out. She saw Mr. McCarty, sitting there and gave him a bright smile.

"Look at you," she said and gave him a wink. A few more girls came out and modeled for the man sitting in the viewing chair. Then it was Bella's turn. Of course, she wasn't wearing her glasses, so she had no idea who she was modeling for. She tripped on the step to the platform she was supposed to stand on. Then it was Rose's turn. As soon as she saw him, she cocked an eyebrow at him, and her smile turned to a scowl. Once she reached the platform, she bent her head to talk to Alice and Bella.

"The nerve of that guy, playing us for a chump. He's even wearing the same funky jacket he was wearing that day," She told the girls giving him the evil eye.

"Who is he?" Bella asked.

"You know, the gas-pump jockey. The guy with the cold-cuts," Rose explained to her half-wit friend.

Once the show was over. Mr. McCarty pointed out Rosalie and asked to see the pink and green number again. Rosalie rolled her eyes and left the platform. She turned and twirled, showing off her dress for a close-up inspection. She stuck her tongue out at Emmett when the manager wasn't looking and went back to the platform.

"Thank you, for your time," Emmett told Anton the manager.

"Is there anything we can wrap up for you?" Anton asked.

"Nope, I don't see a thing I like here. Thanks anyway," and Emmett walked out. As the girls filed back into the dressing room, Rose stopped to speak to Mr. Anton.

"Mr. Anton, I know that guy, and he just played you for a fool. He doesn't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out," Mr. Anton scoffed at Rose's rudeness.

"Ms. Hale, do I tell you how to put on a bathing suit?" Mr. Anton asked her.

"You bet your ass you don't," Rose told him with a scowl.

"Then do not presume to tell me how to run my business, Ms. Hale. Good Day," Mr. Anton replied before stomping out of the showroom.

Once back at the apartment, Rose got ready for her date with Royce, Bella went out again with Jacob, and Alice left for her trip to Maine for the weekend.

While they were out. Edward Cullen sneaked back into New York City. He needed to get up to his apartment to retrieve the checks and document from his safe that proved he paid his taxes. He spoke to the doorman to see if he could go up to his apartment.

The doorman told him that his apartment had been sublet. But two of the three young ladies were out on a date, and the third was out of town for an Elks Lodge convention for the weekend, and they wouldn't be back anytime soon.

Edward went up to the apartment and the first thing he noticed was that the place had been cleaned out. There wasn't a stitch of furniture he'd left in the home. The only thing left are a few lamps, a card table, with four chairs. Even the beds were gone. The girls had been sleeping on cots. He went to the closet, moved the clothes aside to get into the safe. Just as he was about to open the safe, he heard the door opening. Royce and Rosalie were back from their date. Edward had to sneak out to the terrace where it was pouring down rain.

He walkd across the terrace, so he could see into the living and dining room area. He saw Royce walking around. Royce even came to the window and looked out to the terrace at the rain. He watched until he saw Rosalie come out of the bedroom. Once he saw the pair go into the kitchen, he sneaked back into the apartment to try and make his escape. Just as he made it to the front door and opened it, Bella was standing on the other side of the door. She immediately took off her glasses, surprised to see the man standing there.

"Must you be going so soon?" Bella asked giving him the flirty eye and pouty mouth.

"I'm afraid so," Edward whispered.

"Well, nighty-night," Bella wiggled her fingers at the man. She couldn't tell you if she's ever seen that man before in her life.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Royce told Rosalie she made his visit to New York an extraordinary trip indeed.

"Now, I'd like to do something special for you, Beautiful Rose," Royce said to the woman.

"Oh, Royce, it's really not necessary, it was my pleasure," she told him.

"Tell me Rose, is the furniture really out to be cleaned or is there some other explanation?" Royce asked.

"Listen, Royce you don't have to worry about that," she told him. He smiled at her softly.

"Did you hock it or sell it?" he asked her. She rubbed her forehead contemplating whether she should tell him the truth.

"I sold it," she finally said hanging her head in embarrassment.

"Will they sell it back?" He asked.

"That's very generous of you, Royce. Thank you," she accepted graciously.

"Now, my dear, sweet, Rosalie, I must bid you goodbye," He told her.

"Goodbye? But I thought you were staying another week?" She exclaimed, heartbroken.

"I was. But something happened during this last week, that I never expected to happen. I fell in love with you, my sweet girl," Royce told her.

"Then I truly don't understand," Rosalie confessed.

"Rose, when I walked in here with Alice, I was an old widower set in his ways…" Rose cut him off.

"Royce, the way you talk you would think you were as old as Methuselah."

"Rose, my dear, how old are you?" Royce asked. Rosalie looked at him with a straight face and lied.

"Forty." Royce threw his head back in a hearty laugh.

"My sweet, sweet girl. That has got to be the sweetest lie you've ever told. I would say more like twenty-five. Rose, I'm fifty-three-years-old. Over twice your age. Now we could probably support this age difference for another five to ten years. But then where does that leave you. With a truly old man. That isn't fair to you," He told the young woman.

"Royce, you really don't know what you're saying. I really don't like men my own age. You are in the prime of your life," Rosalie told him.

"Dear heart, the best thing that could happen for me, is that you agree to be my wife, which would be the worst thing for you. No, I'm sorry darling, but I must take my leave," he kissed Rosalie chastely on the lips and then on the forehead before turning to the door.

"Can I at least see you off tomorrow?" Rosalie asked.

"No, my dear. My flight is much too early for you. You take care, sweetheart," And then he was gone.

Bella came out of the bedroom where she'd heard everything but stayed hidden to give them some privacy.

"I'm so sorry Rose, but I've got good news, I'm getting married," Bella proclaimed. Rosalie scrunched her nose.

"To who?" Rosalie asked.

"Jacob, of course," Bella told her. Rose shook her head as if she was trying to make sense of what just happened. How could this dumb 'Bells' land a husband, and she couldn't?

"He has to be in London next week, so we are flying down to Atlantic City to meet his mother tomorrow," Bella told her.

"What does this guy do again?" Rose asked.

"Oil, darling. Barrels of it. But it's all in Saudi Arabia," Bella told her.

"Yeah, so he says. I think we ought to check this guy out," Rose told her friend.

"Why?" Bella asked.

"Because, honey, nobody's mother lives in Atlantic City on a Saturday," Rosalie told her dimwit friend, sarcastically

The next day, as he promised, Royce had repurchased the furniture for the apartment, and it was delivered first thing that morning, including the Grand Piano.

ON A COMMUTER TRAIN, SOMEWHERE IN NEW ENGLAND

James and Alice took a train up to Maine to be sure no one that knew James saw him. Once they arrived, Alice felt like she was about to die. She was feverish and just felt awful. She was shivering when they got off the train, not only because the snow on the ground was knee deep. They were met by a handsome young man named Jasper.

"You're not the usual driver," James inquired.

"Nope, that'd be my brother Peter," Jasper drawled. He went out last night and had a little too much to drink. You alright there, Darlin' you don't look too good," Jasper asked the beautiful woman.

"No, not really," Alice answered. Jasper was concerned for the pretty girl but drove them to the lodge nonetheless. Alice looked around as they drove. She couldn't believe they would have an Elks Lodge convention all the way out here in the boonies. Once Jasper stopped driving and got out of the car. She saw a beautiful two-story log cabin. She furrowed her brow and cocked her head to the side.

"So, they are having it here, in this house?" she asked.

"Who? I swear Ms. Brandon, I don't know what you are talking about half the time," James told her. Jasper carried their luggage inside the lodge, James and Alice followed him in. Alice looked around still not understanding.

"Where are the others?" Alice asked.

"WHAT OTHERS?" James growled.

"The other members. My mother and I went to an Elks Lodge convention in Philadelphia, and there were thousands of members," Alice felt as if she was going to cry.

"Is that where you thought you were going?" James asked.

"Of course, what else could I mean?" Alice was crying now.

"I am terribly sorry Ms. Brandon, but there has been a horrible misunderstanding,"

"Pardon, me. I don't mean to interrupt, but where do you want me to put your luggage? It's gettin' cumbersome over here," Jasper asked scowling as he listens to the two morons.

"Back in the car!" James yelled.

"WHAT?!" Jasper yelled back as he dropped the luggage right in the middle of the floor.

"Back in the car, we're going back to New York," James told the young man.

"Not tonight you ain't. There ain't another train to New York 'til tomorrow afternoon, Jasper told them.

"OH, GOD! I'M GOING TO DIE I TELL YOU! I NEED TO SEE A DOCTOR. IS THERE A DOCTOR ALL THE WAY OUT HERE?" Alice was panicked.

"Well I could call my sister-in-law Charlotte," Jasper told the couple. James went to feel Alice's head, and Alice flinched.

"DON'T YOU HIT ME!"

"I'm not going to hit you, I just want to feel your forehead to see if you have a fever," James touched her forehead, and indeed it was quite warm. He looked at Jasper.

"Have you got a thermometer?" James asked Jasper. Jasper looked around and thought about the thermometer outside the door. He went out, grabbed it, and handed it to James.

"Open your mouth," James commanded Alice.

"What are you going to do with that thing?" Alice asked.

"I need to take your temperature," James told her.

"NOT WITH THAT THING! THAT'S FOR HOUSES NOT HUMANS!" Alice screeched.

"Open your mouth Ms. Brandon, or I swear I will stick this thermometer…"

"HEY!" Both Alice and Jasper exclaimed. When she exclaimed, James stuck the thermometer in her mouth.

"Do you want me to call my sister-in-law or what?" Jasper asked.

"And what good would that do?" James asked.

"Char is a nurse, I could tell her the symptoms, and she can tell us what's wrong with her," Jasper advised.

"Okay," James said as he pulled the thermometer out of Alice's mouth. It read one hundred and two degrees.

"You do have a slight temperature?" James advised them.

"Well, you might call that a slight temperature in New York, but in Maine that's considered a very sick girl. If she were my daughter she would be in bed," Jasper told the crotchety old man.

"Well she isn't your daughter, and before you say anything she isn't my daughter either," James said as Jasper pulled out his phone.

"Char, what's wrong with a girl if she's shivering and has a hundred and two fever?" He listened to the woman on the phone.

"Are her eyes watering?" Jasper asked

"Like faucets," Alice replied.

"Have her stick out her tongue," Jasper instructed. Alice did.

"It's kind of red,' James replied.

"Yeah, Char it's blotchy," Jasper told the woman.

"Look behind her ears," were Jasper's next instructions. James pulled on one of Alice's ears lightly.

"Have you been scratching yourself?" James asked.

"Models aren't allowed to scratch," Alice replied sarcastically.

"Yeah, she's got a rash behind her ears," Jasper told his sister-in-law. Jasper then listened to everything she had to say.

"Uh-huh,"

"Uh-huh,"

"Uh-huh,"

"Uh-huh,"

"Uh-huh,"

"Uh-huh, Okay thanks Char. See ya in a bit," Jasper said as he hung up the phone.

"Char says she's got the measles. Keep her in a quiet room, plenty of fluids, no scratching, and she should be fine in a week or two.

"A WEEK OR TWO!" Both James and Alice exclaimed, simultaneously.

"OH BROTHER!" Alice began sobbing uncontrollably.

MEANWHILE BACK IN NEW YORK

Edward made a second attempt to get his documents from his apartment's safe. Again, the doorman gave him the excuse that all the girls were out of the apartment. One was working, another on a date and the third was still away at an Elks convention.

"Yeah, you gave me that same line last night," Edward said as he took off his glasses and swiped his long fingers over his face. Edward took the elevator back up to the apartment. Placing his key in the door to unlock it, he waited a moment before entering, making sure no one was there to be surprised by his entrance. After he felt the coast was clear he entered the apartment, only this time, he shook his head, startled. All his furniture was back in its original place, including the beautiful grand piano.

Edward hurried off to his mission of getting his documents from the safe. As he walked into the bedroom, he noticed it, too, was again fully furnished. He had to do another double take. Without time to waste, he proceeded to the closet and retrieved his documents. Just as he closed the safe and slid the clothing back into place, the phone began to ring. He hurried to make his way out of the bedroom and out of the apartment. Just as he entered the living room to make his final escape, the front door flew open, and Bella scurried in to catch the phone in time. While her back was turned, Edward tiptoed his way to the door and was almost in the clear, when Bella turned around to see him.

"She's not back yet," Bella informed Edward.

"Okay?" Edward wasn't sure who she was referring to. But thought to agree to be on the safe side.

"I'll tell her you dropped by," Bella said, then went back to her phone call. Edward promptly left the apartment. It was Jacob on the line.

"I'm afraid I'm stuck in a meeting in Washington, DC," Jacob explained to Bella.

"Oh, no! Does that mean the trip is canceled?" Bella asked.

"No, No, honey. Here is what I want you to do…" Jacob went on to explain what plane she should take out of JFK to Atlantic City. He then lifted his eye patch so he could read the flight number correctly.

Bella ended the phone call, went into the bedroom and packed a bag for Atlantic City.

Once on the plane, Bella fastened her seatbelt and settled in with a book. A few moments later Edward sauntered onto the plane and took the seat next to Bella. He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes before settling them back on his face. He smiled as he saw the beautiful girl from his apartment, with the big soulful brown eyes. He then happened to notice the book she was reading. When he scrunched up his face for a moment, it came to him.

"Hey there," Edward said to the young woman.

"Hi," Bella said quite seductively.

"Didn't you bring your glasses?" Edward asked Bella

"I don't wear glasses," Bella was quite offended.

"Well if you don't, you've got the most peculiar eyes I've ever seen," Edward informed her.

"What would make you say such a thing?" Bella asked.

"Well, for one thing, you're reading that book upside-down," Edward informed the girl. Bella gasped in shock.

"I most certainly am not. I am sitting perfectly fine in this seat, thank you very much," Bella said very confidently.

"Not you, the book…the book is upside down," Edward informed Bella. Bella looked down at the book, then pulled it close to her nose. Edward took the book from her hand, turned it right side up, and handed it back to Bella. Bella just ducked her head in embarrassment.

"Aw, don't be embarrassed, lovely. I used to be just like that. Running into doors and shaking hands with lamp posts. Afraid of people calling me four-eyes. Then something cured me of that once and for all," Edward informed Bella.

"Oh yeah, what was that?" Bella asked.

"I ran into four guys in one day, that I owed money to," Edward said with a chuckle.

"Well, why aren't you wearing your glasses now?" Bella asked.

"I am wearing them," Edward replied. Bella then pressed her face up to Edward's. Their noses were almost touching.

"Oh, well, there you go. But it's different for girls, don't you think?" Bella asked.

"Why would you say that?" Edward asked.

"You know what they say, 'Men don't make passes at girls who wear glasses," Bella quoted.

"Have you ever tried? Why don't you try with me?" Edward said with a charming crooked smile. Bella's face fell a little.

"Look, I'll tell you first off, I already think you are quite a looker. Didn't you bring them with you?" Edward told Bella. Bella nodded her head and fished her glasses out of her purse. She then placed them on her face and slowly turned to look at Edward. Edward gave her a charming smile.

"Wow!" Edward exclaimed.

"You don't think they make me look like a librarian or a school teacher?" Bella asked.

"Lovely, if I had teachers and librarians that looked like you, I may have paid more attention in school, and wouldn't be on the lamb now," Edward told her with a chuckle. Now with her glasses on, Bella knew precisely who the young man was sitting next to her.

"It's you! I told Rose you stopped by," Bella explained.

"That's not why I was at the apartment," Edward went on to explain why he was at the apartment. That he had to get the documents to prove he paid his taxes. He now was going to confront the accountant in Kansas City, who spent the money instead of making his tax payment.

"Well if you need to go to Kansas City, why are you going to Atlantic City?" Bella asked.

"Who's going to Atlantic City?" Edward asked.

"Isn't this plane going to Atlantic City?" Bella asked.

"No this is the non-stop flight from JFK to Kansas City, MO," Edward informed Bella. Bella's mouth hung open for a moment before she cuddled up next to Edward.

"Well, there you go," was all Bella said.

BACK IN MAINE

TWO WEEKS LATER.

Alice and Jasper were having a marvelous time together. James was now laid up at the cabin lodge, having contracted the measles from Alice

Jasper took Alice out skiing, and upon the mountain sightseeing. Jasper explained to Alice that he was a forest ranger and wanted to show her his look-out.

"You see that ridge over there? Well, mine is from that ridge all the way across to that mountain, all the way around to where we are standing now," Jasper explained.

"I don't understand, what are we looking at?" Alice asked.

"The trees and forest," Jasper said obviously.

"Isn't that what they call timber?" Alice asked

"The best in New England," Jasper answered proudly. Alice's eyes lit up

"And all of this is yours?" Alice asked.

"Sure is." Jasper replied.

"Show me again, what all is yours?" Alice asked again in awe.

Later in the week, Jasper took her to his look-out shack.

"I've heard all about these forest shacks in Better Homes and Gardens," Alice said as she cozied up next to Jasper for the drive. When they finally came upon the shack, Alice was confused.

"But, that is a shack. How do you and your family live in that little thing? With all the money you have why don't you build a bigger one."

"Money? HA! That's a laugh. I barely have $100 in my savings account," Jasper chuckled.

"But, all that timber you own…"

"OWN? Darlin', I don't own it. I just watch it," Jasper told her. He was perplexed.

"You mean you just look at them?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, to make sure they don't catch fire," Jasper told her.

"You mean like a fireman for trees?" Alice asked.

"Well, yeah. I told you I was a forest ranger," Jasper explained.

"I thought you just meant you were from Texas is all. Oh, Honey, this is the worst. And I'm absolutely crazy about you," Alice said as if she would cry.

"Well I'm crazy about you too, Darlin'," Jasper said.

"Oh no! It wasn't supposed to be like this," Alice exclaimed

"Oh, I get it, you mean because I don't own trees," Jasper said scornfully as he turned the car around to drive them back.

MEANWHILE, BACK IN NEW YORK CITY

Those two bubbleheads had left Rosalie on the hook for that apartment. Little by little she started selling off the furniture again.

She was just figuring out what she was going to eat for dinner when her phone rang.

"Rosie, honey, It's Emmett McCarty. How's about having dinner with me tonight," Emmett asked over the phone.

"Sure, why not. It's not like I got anything better to do," Rose replied.

"Well, gee thanks," Emmett said sarcastically. "How's about I pick you up in an hour?" Emmett asked.

"Sure, we can go someplace that won't break your bank. How about we just grab a couple of burgers," Rose said.

"If that's what you'd like. See you in an hour," Emmett said and disconnected the call.

An hour later, Emmett picked Rosalie up in a cab and had a couple of burgers from a greasy diner in midtown. The whole meal, all Rosalie talked about was how she wanted to marry a rich guy, and how she only seemed to attract guys like Emmett; cute, sexy, gas pump jockeys. Emmett just listened and rolled his eyes. Finally, the meal was over, and they got back in a cab. On the way home, Rosalie and Emmett made out in the back of the cab.

"Once I get home, I never want to see you again," Rosalie said, then went back to sucking face with Emmett.

The next few weeks was a repeat of the same date. Emmett asking Rose out, Rose putting Emmett down on every turn, only for them to make out all the way home.

"Once I get home, I never want to see you again," Rosalie would repeat after each date.

Finally, Emmett started getting the message. He stopped calling. Just as Rosalie again was selling the last of the furniture from the apartment, Royce walked through the door, as the guys were walking out with the furniture. Rosalie was just putting the check in her purse when he walked in.

"Royce? What are you doing here?" Rosalie asked in surprise.

"Can an old man have a change of heart?" Royce then got down on one knee.

"Rosalie, darling, I can't stop thinking about you. Will you do this old man the pleasure of becoming my wife?" Royce asked as he pulled out a 10-carat diamond ring from his breast pocket.

"Hold that thought for one minute," Rose said as she held up one finger and ran to the door intercom.

"Richie, stop those furniture guys and send them right back up here," Rosalie said to the doorman, before returning to Royce and giving him a passionate kiss.

A month later, the apartment was filled to the brim with guests, when Bella and Edward walked in. Bella was wearing her glasses. She went straight to Rosalie's room to find Rose wearing a white, below the knee suit.

"Hi Rose," Bella said sheepishly.

"Well, where have you been?" Rose asked.

"Well, about that. I got married," Bella explained.

"To Blinky?" Rosalie asked.

"Umm, no. To Edward," Bella said.

"Edward? Who's he? Is he holding?" Rosalie asked.

"Well, I met him on the plane to Kansas City…" Bella started when Rosalie interrupted

"Kansas City, I thought you were going to Atlantic City...You know what, save it. So, how much is he worth?"

"Well, you see, He actually owns this apartment, and once he can get his hands on his money…" Rosalie interrupted again.

"Oh no, so you're on the lamb with this guy? Did I not teach you anything?" Rose asked shaking her head.

"Well, I see you finally caught your bear. How much?" Bella asked.

"One hundred mil, give or take a mil," Rosalie said smugly.

"Well, that's wonderful, Rose. Congratulations. Would you like to meet my Edward?" Bella asked.

"Of course, why not," Rosalie replied. With that, Bella flew out of the room to go get Edward. Just as Bella left the room, Alice strolled into the apartment. She saw Royce first.

"Well, now Royce. Looks like I got back just in time. Congratulations, where's Rose?" Alice asked

"Hi, there Alice. Thank you. Rosalie's in the bedroom getting dressed," Royce told Alice.

"Jasper, honey, why don't you stay here and keep Royce company while I go talk to Rosalie," Alice said. She gave Jasper a chaste kiss on the lips before going to look for Rosalie. Alice strolled into the bedroom, where Rosalie was sitting at her vanity putting on her veil.

"Hi Rose," Alice said.

"Well, well. Look what the cat drug in," Rose said as she looked at Alice from the mirror.

"So, I see you finally got your guy. How much is he worth?" Alice asked sheepishly

"Three hundred mil, give or take a mil," Rosalie told Alice. "So where have you been?" Rose asked Alice.

"Um, in Maine. I got married too," Alice said.

"To Grumpy? I thought he was already married."

"He is, and no, to Jasper," Alice said.

"What does he do?" Rose asked

"Um…He's sort of a fireman for trees," Alice replied. Rosalie just rolled her eyes.

"Well as long as you're happy," Rosie told Alice, giving her a hug. Bella then strolled into the room with her Edward and introduced him to her friends.

"Well just look at us, we're about to be three married women," Bella said. Alice then rushed out of the room to go get Jasper. Just as she made it back and introduced him to Rose and Bella, the wedding planner came into the room.

"Ms. Hale, it's time to start," the woman told Rosalie.

"Well girls, I guess you better take your places out there. I'll see you once this is over. Bella helped Rose pull the veil over her face then gave her a hug. Alice gave Rose a hug, then Bella and Alice linked arms with their guys and walked out with the rest of the guest.

As the wedding march began to play, a beautiful Rosalie came out to marry her man. She passed Bella and Alice and saw how happy those two dimwits were with their two broke guys. She then looked up into Royce's smiling face and realized she couldn't go through with it. As soon as she reached Royce, she faked a faint. All the guests gasped, and Royce lifted her bridal style and carried her back to the room, laying her on the bed. He then went to the bathroom and retrieved a cold cloth for her head. Once Royce returned to the room, Rosalie was sitting up on the bed.

"Darling, are you alright?" Royce asked as he sat next to Rosalie on the bed. Rose lifted her hand and stroked him on the cheek.

"I'm sorry. You don't deserve someone that doesn't love you outright. And I probably could have done it, if those two bubbleheads hadn't come back. And did you see those clods they showed up with? Just look at them, all happy and in love.

"Oh, I see. And do you have a guy that you are head over heels for?" Royce asked. Rose hung her head.

"Yeah, I attract them like flies. The regular gas pump jockey. You know the type, good looking, with a face that will break hearts. A body of a god, and broke as a joke," Rosalie told him.

"Well there's a guy out there that fits that description," Royce told her.

"See what I mean. Who does he think he is, crashing my wedding? I bet he's not even wearing a tie," Rose told Royce.

"No, as a matter of fact, he isn't. And you're sure he's non-holding?" Royce asked.

"One more burger from a greasy diner will break him," Rose told him. "Have I hurt you badly?" Rose asked.

"Oh, my darling. I am hurt. But the one thing that comes with age is that you learn to get over disappointments. Why don't I go get your guy for you?" Royce said as he flashed out of the room. Rose called out to stop him, but Royce kept going.

Royce walked out to find Emmett McCarty standing against the wall with a scowl on his face.

"King," Emmett said as he nodded to Royce.

"Well, McCarty, long time no see," Royce said to Emmett. "It seems congratulations are in order."

"Yeah, you don't gotta rub it in. All that dame ever talks about is dough, dough, dough. Well, I'm done. She's all yours," Emmett told Royce, continuing to scowl.

"Well, son, don't throw in the towel so fast. There seems to have been a delayed reaction…in your favor," Royce told Emmett. Emmett's face lit up, then suddenly it was back to a scowl.

"Did you tell her about me?" Emmett asked.

"Oh, no. As far as she knows you're still pumping gas," Royce confirmed. Emmett didn't even stop to think about it. He rushed to the bedroom to seek Rosalie

"You! What are you doing here? I told you I never wanted…" Rosalie was interrupted by Emmett pulling her into a passionate kiss.

LATER THAT EVENING

The three newly married couples were sitting in the same greasy diner as Emmett's and Rosalie's first date.

"So look at us girls with our men. Broke as a joke but happy as a lark," Rosalie said.

"Well I wouldn't exactly say I'm broke, I could probably pull together a couple of hundred dollars," Jasper said as a joke. Everyone laughed.

"And what about you four-eyes?" Rose asked Edward.

"Well, once I get my hands on…" Edward was interrupted by everyone's laughter.

"Yeah, yeah. We've heard that line before. And what about you, husband of mine?" Rose asked

Well, if push came to shove, I could probably get my hands on a quick mil. But total I think I'm about up to three hundred and fifty mil, give or take a few mil," Emmett said.

"Oh, three hundred and fifty mil. And what might be the assets associated with this three hundred and fifty mil?" Rose asked, thinking this was all a joke.

"Well, there's cattle back in Texas. A timber mill up in Maine. A fur trapping business in Vermont. Some stocks and bonds. Then there's McCarty Oil, McCarty Investments, McCarty Savings and Loan, and of course the McCarty Building." Emmett then pulled out a wad of cash as big is his fist. From that fist of cash, he pulled out a $1000 bill to pay the meal tab.

"Keep the change Mac," Emmett told the short order cook. All the girls sat there with their mouths open before all three women passed out on the floor. The men picked up their beers while looking down at their wives on the floor.

"To our wives," Emmett said while clinking their beer mugs together.