Harry's Diary

Monday 1st December 2020

-5.47am

"Nikki?"

"Hmm?"

"It's far too early in the morning for this." Not even six in the morning yet, first day of December and am freezing cold, stood at bottom of garden in dressing gown, slippers and bloody bare legs watching wife as of April search the flowerbeds for perfect hiding place for jelly Marks and Spencer's Collin Caterpillar. You couldn't make it up.

"Of course it is! Oh come on Scrooge, get into the spirit of it! It's the first day of advent, if we're not going to make an effort with Josi's advent treasure hunt today then we might as well not bother!"

Hmph.

"But Nikki! I know that, and yes the look on Josi's face when she can't quite figure out our advent treasure hunt clues are absolutely priceless, but quarter to six in the morning? Really?"

"Well it has to be all sorted before she wakes up! We didn't have a garden to make use of last year, hiding things outside is just going to make it so much more exciting, don't you think?"

I should explain. Last December, Nikki and I decided buying chocolate advent calendar for daughter year after year was a bit boring and downright unimaginative. So spent a whole evening once Josi was in bed making two-step advent treasure hunt for each day counting down until Christmas with series of more varied prizes at the end.

Anyway, last year was such a huge success that wasn't really even a question about doing it all again. Added twist of advent 2020, however, is that having moved house since last Christmas, Cunningham family are now in possession of garden. One which Nikki has seemed determined to take full advantage of in all ways physically possible ever since moving in.

"But Nikki, Josi's not actually going to be out here looking for anything for another hour and a half at least! Those jelly snake things will have frozen by then, it's so cold out here!"

"You know full well they're caterpillars! Look, see, it's perfect! She's going to have to think about that but it's not impossible, either. Perfect."

Ohhh the temptation. Hmm… to make joke or to not make joke. Think Nikki is in rather good mood for not quite six in the morning, going to risk it. Far too tempting to not.

"Yep, perfect. Let's just hope next door's cat doesn't decide to urinate in our flowerpots again."

Hehehehehehehehe grossed her out, can tell from the look on her face. Priceless.

"Harry! Ewww!"

"Well that's what you get for leaving unwrapped sweets in the garden at six in the morning! Never trust a cat Nikki, especially a tabby cat. There's something sinister about that thing."

"Never trust a cat?" Ohhh she's laughing now, love making her laugh. "Had a bad experience, did you?"

"The one from the house opposite when I was a child used to sneak in through our back door and perch itself on top of my hamster cage; I could never trust a cat again."

"Do early mornings in the cold bring out even more sarcasm than ever in you?"

"Quite possibly. Does that mean I'm excused from tomorrow morning's advent prize hiding?"

"Absolutely not."

-6.34am

Ahhh, thank goodness for that. Back in nice warm bed after horrible cold garden, am in heaven. Nikki disappeared off to have shower as soon as jelly caterpillar things were hidden, so took opportunity to dive back under covers and warm up. Much better. Will just have five more minutes.

-6.39am

And another five. Can't hurt.

-6.51am

Shit. Eeeek wasn't planning of staying in bed quite that long, better get up. Will most likely have hyperactive nine year old on hands any minute now, first day of sweets before 8am of the year tends to lead to overexcitement, as have learnt over last few years. God I miss being that age. Although must admit, is almost better to be the adult in advent treasure hunt scenario, as get to giggle at darling offspring's attempts to locate sweets. If last year is anything to go by, will be thoroughly amusing.

-6.56am

Ah, here she comes.

"Morning Daddy!"

"Morning. You seem happy." Will torture her for a bit pretending to be ridiculously slow as to what day it is today, far too much fun. Denying darling offspring of sugar always is.

"Of course I am, it's almost Christmas! Aren't you excited Daddy?"

"Oh I don't know about that, Josi. It's still another 24 days to go yet, don't you think it's a bit early to be getting excited?"

"But it's Christmas this month!"

Hehehehe, I know exactly what she's getting at really, of course, but will hold her off for a bit longer just for comedy value. "24 days though Josi, that's still more than half a month. There's no point getting too excited yet, nothing special's happening today, is it?"

Ohhh got her, look on her face is absolutely priceless.

"Daddy! It's December 1st!"

"Pinch, punch, first day of the month and no returns?"

Hehehehe, love making her giggle, sounds like Nikki in miniature. Also like Nikki, is incredibly ticklish. Which makes it all too easy to make her laugh at a moment's notice.

"Daddyyyy! You know that wasn't what I meant!"

"Do I?"

"Yes, you do! It's the first day of advent!"

"Is it?" Not sure am going to be able to spin this one out for too much longer, better make the most of it.

"You know it is! Daddy?"

"Yes?" Ohhh bet I know what this next question's going to be.

"So do I get chocolate? Or sweets, I'll settle for sweets."

Yep. I know her too well.

"Of course you do, come on then. Mummy and I have made you a treasure hunt again this year, so you can have your first clue when you've finished your breakfast, OK?"

"Can't I have it before? As soon as I'm dressed?"

Awww, she's rather adorable when she's over-excited.

"Nope. I know exactly what you'll do Joycelin Cunningham, you'll spend forever hunting for sweets and before we know it it'll be time to leave for school and you won't have had any breakfast. Food first, then sweets."

"But sweets technically are food Daddy, so why can't I hunt for sweets first and have those as my breakfast if there isn't enough time for Weetabix?"

"Because your Mum and I can't send you to school on nothing but sugar Josi, absolutely no way. You'd be bouncing off the walls." Quite literally, judging by what she was learning to do in dancing last week.

"But I'll be bouncing off the walls if you don't let me have sweets on the first day of advent too!"

"Not my call Josi, you'll have to ask Mummy. Right come on, go and get dressed."

"So will Mummy let me do the treasure hunt before school? Will you persuade her for me?"

Damn, she's doing the puppy eye thing. Can't resist the puppy eye thing, especially given she only does it when after something harmless like sweets.

"Only if you get dressed in the next ten minutes, OK? Then I'll ask Mummy."

God, she has me under her spell. Then again, is my daughter, surely that's OK? Can't resist her mother either, must be genetic. And therefore completely not my fault.

-7.43am

"Harry?"

"Yes, my love?"

"Which shoes, left foot or right foot?"

Ehhh? Both look the same to me. Darling wife has far too many pairs of shoes.

"Whichever Nikki, they both look fine to me."

"Yes, I know that, but which one looks best?"

"Ummm… right foot?" Does it really matter? Apparently so.

"Good, that's what I thought." Is staring out the kitchen window now, looks rather amused. "How long has she been searching for that Collin the Caterpillar now?"

"No idea, 20 minutes? She's being unbelievably slow; you did give her a proper clue, didn't you?"

"Of course I did, my clues are in a different league to yours remember, we established that last Christmas! No, she's just being slow because she's hoping she'll miss assembly if she takes too long."

"Ingenious. How on earth did you suss her out?"

"Because she's been right past the flowerpot with the caterpillar sweet thing at least five times now, and each time she looked at it shiftily and carried on pretending to look up at the apple tree. And the Monday morning school run is routinely dedicated to assembly bashing."

"Are you sure you're not psychic?"

"Yep, positive. You're just slow."

"Oi, you!"

"What?" Hehehehe she's giggling again now, love her giggle.

"I love you, you know. Always."

I did promise you I was going to do it all again this year :) It's going to be a bit of a nightmare getting it all done but I'm going to succeed, I promise! Hopefully I can better last year's advent fic, if you're new to this and wondering what on earth I'm on about then this is going to be a kind of fanfiction advent calendar, with a chapter for each day of December until Christmas :) though I haven't written them all yet, nowhere near, so you still need to leave me lots of lovely reviews if you want more ;)

Try not to let the title worry you too much, I promise it's not what you think. I wanted to jazz it up a bit this year and I wanted more of a plot than last year, then I had this idea but wrote it off because I decided it was too evil. And then I was dancing to the Script's 'Six Degrees of Separation' a couple of weeks ago and it fitted my original idea so perfectly that I decided to run with this anyway ;) But don't worry, it's CHristmas after all, and I promise by Christmas day they'll all have made up and be in love with each other again. Promise. And like I said, it's not what you think :P

Please do review if you want me to carry on writing this, I'm on the 4th at the moment so I need lots of nice reviews to help me get the next few finished :P

Flossie xxx