A/N: I'm taking a break from my other story because this one has been taunting me and dying to get out of me. The idea actually came from my mother, but she asked me to write it since she doesn't have the time too. We are both huge SVM fans so I dedicate this to her (except the citrusy parts those are dedicated to the Viking). Also Tara and Lafayette in this story are modeled after the ones from the show not the books. Enjoy. P.S. I do not own any of the characters, all of the credit goes to Charlaine Harris.

I was working the lunch shift at Merlotte's and luckily it wasn't busy because I was still a little sore from the wounds I sustained during the Fairy War. Also luckily for me it was still cool enough out that I could get away with wearing my winter uniform to hide my still healing arms and legs.

I went through my shift on auto-pilot like I have ever since I've come back to work, I was very thankful for the fact that enough time has passed that people had finally stopped asking me what happened to cause me to "crash" my car. The lying was tiresome and I could tell that most people didn't believe my story anyway. Eric was more than happy to actually crash my car for me though because it gave him an excuse to finally get me a new one.

Sam was keeping a very close eye on me s he had since I returned. I could tell that he was quite aware of the fact that I still had a slight limp even though I was trying to hide it. He would make me sit down every now and then since I would not let him cut back on my hours. I was determined to get my life back to normal. Although there have been no major calamities in my life over the past month and a half I was still on high alert and wanted to squeeze enough normal activity into my life as possible now before it all goes to hell in a hand basket again.

"Hey, Sookie are you alright?" Hoyt asked pulling me out of my reverie.

"Yeah, Hoyt I'm fine is there anything I can get for you?" I tried to plaster on my Crazy Sookie smile but even I have noticed that it is not as bright or large as it had been in the past, making it much less crazy and much more sad.

Hoyt must have notice because he gave me a sympathetic smile and a pat on the shoulder before saying, "No thanks Sook I'm just waiting for Holly. Have you heard from Jason? Holly and I were supposed to take him out tonight to try and cheer him up a little since he is still cut up pretty bad about Crystal but I haven't been able to get a hold of him."

It was so nice of Hoyt to try and cheer up my brother who has had a really rough time of it lately with the horrific death of his estranged wife and unborn baby, the death of his close friend, and the spurning he received from our only living family. Jason was good at putting up a tough front through it all but I and apparently Hoyt knew how much he has been hurting lately.

"No, sorry Hoyt I haven't you know how he's been lately there are some days that he just doesn't want to talk to anyone, he should be coming around soon."

"Your, probably right Sookie, I just worry you know." God bless Hoyt, his heart is so big.

"I know," I said managing my first genuine smile in some time. "He just needs time is all."

"Hey Hoyt, hey Sookie," Holly says bouncing over "let me go get my purse and we will go pick up Jason."

"I can't get in touch with him so maybe we should try him another time in case he needs some space." Replies Hoyt looking towards me questioningly. I give him a slight nod before Holly says.

"Aww that's too bad maybe another time then." I knew she was being sincere which was surprising and touching since I knew that she has never really liked my brother.

I refilled a few drinks as I waited for my relief to come in. Danielle came in shortly and I was all too happy to be leaving. After filling her in on my remaining tables I headed back to get my purse. Sam was in his office going over the books with a very stressed look on his face since it was close to tax season. He looked up when I came in and gave me a small smile. I could tell that he's been dying to ask me something ever since I came back to work and so far I've been really good at avoiding it; tonight I was not so lucky.

"Hey Sook, can you sit for a sec."

"Sure Sam what's up?" I said trying to not sound as annoyed as I was. Sam has always been a good friend to me and I love him for it but he always want to talk about what is going on with me. Right now I would rather not talk about any of it and just try to forget.

"How have you been? I mean after everything." The concern etched on his face looked so painful, it broke my heart

"I'm fine Sam really, Bill and Niall got to me in time, Eric did what he could to heal me, and the portals are closed. Everything is fine now and back to normal." I tried to say it in a tone that had a sense of finality to it but I think I just ended up sounding defeated and exhausted.

"You and I both know that nothing is fine but if you want to delude yourself into believing that it is then that is up to you. I'm just waiting for the day that you look up and see the mess your making of your life, you keep sticking your neck out for people and end up bloodied and beaten in return. Don't you see they aren't worth it."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, of all of the things I was expecting to hear from my dear friend Sam this was definitely not it. I couldn't have hidden my shock if I wanted to. I shot straight up out of the chair and yelled. "Sam Merlotte, I never in a million years would have expected this from you. You are supposed to be my friend, how dare you talk to me that way."

Sam was equally as angry now and also stands bring us practically nose to nose over his desk. "I am your friend that is why I'm talking to you this way. I am tired of watching you throw your life away from these people who don't care about you, haven't you noticed that as soon as they get what they need from you they leave. Where is Bill, where is Eric, and Niall, and that fool brother of yours. You bend over backwards for them and they leave you behind. I'm tired of standing idly by and watching you try to put your life back together time and time again. It all needs to stop."

Before I could respond Tara comes barging in. "What the hell is going on in here we can hear y'all shouting clear across the bar."

I couldn't hold my tears when I looked at Tara. She came into the office put her arm around me and quickly ushered me out. She walked me to employee lot and waited for me to calm down before saying anything.

"You okay?"

I couldn't look up at her and just shook my head no.

"You want to talk about it."

I shook my head again.

"When you are ready to talk I'll be here, I just hope it's soon."

I nodded and she gave me a hug before heading back inside.

I got into my new red (go figure) Volkswagen Jetta and headed home. I was still reeling from what happened between Sam and me. I know that on some level he is right and he was just acting out of concern but I hurt nonetheless. Just then my phone rings.

"Hello"

Lover, what has you so upset?

I was so out of it I hadn't noticed that they sun had set already.

"I just had fight with Sam, it was nothing."

You have a habit of saying everything is nothing recently. If it were truly nothing you would not be so upset.

"I'm fine. I'll be by later after I check on Bill and Amelia."

Eric sighed unnecessarily. Until then Lover.

We hung up and I continued on my way to Bill's house. Every night since I've gone to back to work I have gone to check on Bill after my shift. I pulled up to the old Compton house and let myself in. I was pleasantly surprised to see that today Bill has made his way to the living room couch today from his newly light tight bedroom upstairs. I guess the constant supply of living donors and True Blood that Dr. Ludwig has been sending over has paid off.

"Well I see some on is feeling better."

"Yes, some what but not 100 percent better yet. I see your limping less which makes me happy."

"Yup, I guess it all takes time right."

Bill just smiled and made a move to sit up.

"Oh no you don't Bill Compton you stay right where you are, you have already done too much coming all the way down here."

"Yes mother." He says with a bit of a smile. Bill has taken to calling me mom, mother, and mommy as a way to poke fun at the amount of time I spend checking up on him.

"I hate it when you call me that and you know it."

"Yes which is why I continue to do it." I know he noticed my mood when I came in and is trying to cheer me up but I can't help but feel that his condition is entirely my fault.

"So what are we watching today?" I said as I took up a seat on the floor in front of him.

"I was thinking Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It should be good for a laugh."

I just shook my head as he pressed play on the remote. "Since when do you have a sense of humor Bill? No offense, but you were always so serious before."

"I figure that I have two options: one I could sit well lay around feeling sorry for myself ignoring my circumstances and rot away slowly; or I could try and make the best of it and try to find joy in what I have while I have it."

There is nothing like a near (final) death experience to change your outlook on things. I was envious of Bill's optimistic attitude. I decided to try it out for a bit and if it doesn't work I'll go back to ignoring all of what has happened.

I had forgotten how funny the movie was especially when Pee Wee Herman's character dies. Before I knew it, it was 8:30 and the donors where arriving. As usual I offered to stay until he was done but he assured me that he would glamour them into forgetting that they were there and that he was sick. I gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before heading out to my car.

As much as I like spending time with Bill I must admit that the motivation behind my daily visits are completely selfish. I feel so guilty for his situation, if I had only gone to stay with Eric, or paid closer attention when I was going into the house that day all of this could have been avoided. But I have to stop thinking like that if I'm going to have a more optimistic outlook like Bill. If he can do it from Death's doorstep then I can do it too.

I pulled up into my driveway and mentally prepared myself for phase two of Operation Easy Sookie's Guilt. I shored up my mental shields and walked in the backdoor. Amelia was also lying on the couch, but she looked like she was in a lot worse shape than Bill. Her eyes were red and blotchy; there was a mountain of tissues on the floor in front of her and she was watching reruns of the Golden Girls, which like Law and Order seems to always be on.

"Hey Amelia, which one is on today." I have learned to stop asking how she is feeling and just focus on what happened on TV that day since it seems to be the only conversation that doesn't set her off.

"Blanch met a man, he disappointed her, then the other girls stuck by her, Rose told a story about St. Olaf, blah, blah, blah."

I didn't say anything because I could see that she was in one of her darker moods today, so I just went about my daily routine of cleaning up the tissues and making dinner.

Amelia was dealing well with Tray's death at first; she didn't blame me in the slightest and had gone back to work at the insurance office. That changed when Tray's ex-wife showed up on the doorstep with a box of his old stuff. In the box was a small ring box with a note from the ex-wife attached to it. It said, "I guess he was planning on giving this to you." Inside the box was a simple diamond engagement ring.

Amelia cried for days and has been wearing the ring ever since. It was then that Amelia started blaming me. She never said it out loud but she didn't halve to. She blamed me from taking her future from her and I couldn't help but thinking she was right. So I did everything I could think of to make it up to her and take care of her while she got better.

She had her days when she was almost back to the old Amelia, but more often than not there was something that happened during the day or night that would remind her of Tray and she would spiral downwards again.

I called her to the table when I finished making dinner. I would usually bring the food to her on a tray so she could eat it in front of the television but today I was determined to get her up and moving.

After much persuasion I finally got her to the table. As usual she poked and picked at the food but she ate most of it for once. She has gotten very skinny recently and I have been worried, but that helped to relax my nerves.

After cleaning up the dishes I was actually successful in convincing Amelia to take a shower after which I brushed her hair out for her. I was expected the normal silence during our tandem TV time but was pleasantly surprised when she started talking.

"How was work?"

"It was okay, the usual, nothing exciting." I wanted to avoid talking about my fight with Sam.

"That's good. It is really brave of you to go back to work so soon after…everything."

This was the closest we ever got to talking about what happened the night of the Fairy War. "I just needed something to distract me you know."

"Yeah, I think I do." She looked thoughtful for a moment before changing the subject. "How's Bill doing?"

"He is getting better slowly, he made it down to the couch today."

"That's good to hear, tell him hi for me."

"Will do. I'm going to get ready to head over to Fangtasia."

I headed to my bedroom and took a quick shower before changing into some jeans and long-sleeved t-shirt. I had completely given up on trying to look nice for my trips there much to Pam's chagrin. When I went back into the living room I found Amelia cleaning which was a welcomed sight. I was so excited to see her up and about that I ran over and gave her a huge hug.

She laughed saying, "Yeah I'll miss you too. See you tomorrow."

I let her go "Okay yeah, see you later."

I got into the car and headed for Fangtasia much happier than I had been a few hours ago. If my friends who have been through worse things than I have recently can start to see the light at the end of the tunnel I could to.

When I pulled into the parking lot of Fangtasia into my normal spot next to Eric's red Corvette. For the first time in a long time I had a song in my heart and pep in my step and I walked up to the front door instead of sneaking in the back like I usually do. Pam was surprised to see me.

"My, my aren't we looking better, but your clothes still look like hell."

"It's nice to see you too Pam." I couldn't help but smile at her I missed actually appreciating her snarky attitude.

She actually smiled at me and moved aside to let me in. I was in such a good mood that I didn't even notice the thoughts of the fangbangers who I just cut in front of on the line.

I walked through the bar and followed the calm feeling to my Viking vampire. Most nights I would come here just to feel the calm that I get through my bond with Eric. More often than not I would just sit in his office while he was in the bar so that I could feel relaxed and have a chance to think. On those nights I would refuse to be in the same room as him until after closing when he would drive me home.

Tonight I walked over to his booth and waited for him to come sit with me. Ginger brought me over a coke since I have made it a point to not drink while in my depressed state for fear of making worse. It is pathetic to be the crying woman at the bar. Eric joined me shortly. He sat across from me giving me an appraising look.

"Lover it is good to see that you are in a better mood, you were becoming insufferable."

"Gee thanks, but I am feeling better I figure should make the best of it and try to find joy in what I have while I have it." I said quoting Bill, the influence of my new brighter, more optimistic attitude.

"Wow, what caused the change in attitude?"

I couldn't help but laugh anticipating Eric's reaction to my response. "Well Bill said that earlier while we were watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and I realized that if he could feel that way and he is practically half dead, then I have no excuse."

Eric quirked his eyebrow "Since when is Bill such the optimist?"

"I guess almost finally dying changes a person, he even has a sense of humor now. Its so weird but nice too." I couldn't help the smile that played on my lips.

Eric shifted a bit in his seat and I picked up a hint of something odd in the bond. "If I didn't know any better Mr. Northman I would say you were jealous." I said teasingly raising an eyebrow of my own.

"I still don't know why you feel the need to go over there every night, there is nothing you can do for him."

"I do it because he is my friend and I owe it to him since it is my fault after all." I felt my good mood ebbing away slowly with this conversation.

"Exactly every night you go there I there is an intense feeling of guilt that comes across the bond. I don't like the feeling and I don't know why you subject yourself to it."

"Imagine how guilty I would feel if it didn't go at all, you should know me better than that by now, I would never be able to live with myself."

"This is true lover, your heart is too big for your own good sometimes. You have stuck your neck out for myself and others on many occasions. I still don't know how properly thank you." I knew he was thinking about the bombing at Rhodes but his sincerity was still overwhelming.

I stood up abruptly and stuck my hand out to him desperate focus on lighter things. "Dance with me."

"Are you sure your not ill, isn't it time for you to hide in my office for the rest of the night you've been out here for an entire 20 minutes." He said poking fun at me as he got up from his seat slowly. I saw a golden opportunity that I just couldn't let slip by.

When I "pulled" him to the dance floor I reached up to his ear and whispered. "If you're lucky we can hide in your office together later."

The look on his face was priceless and I couldn't help but soak it up as I danced like it was the world was ending. It felt so good to dance again, it felt even better to be dancing with Eric again; he had been so kind and understanding through all of my healing and bad moods.

Feeding off of our mutual good mood we danced until closing without even realizing it. When we finally stopped my hair was a mess and I was a sweaty mess. Pam walked over to us clearly amused with our little show.

"I see the Energizer bunny does stop going at some point." She said smirking at me. "And by the looks of you two if I didn't know our little Sookie here better I would say you two were doing more than dancing out there."

I looked over to Eric whose hair for the first time (outside if the bedroom) was disheveled and his clothes were rumpled. I could not help but laugh. Pam gave us a genuine smile and gave me my biggest shock of the day when she hugged me. Before I could react she walked away.

I turned to look up at Eric who was grinning like an idiot. "Who is that woman and what has she done with my Pam."

"Your Pam huh, well I am happy to see my girls like each other so much." He looked down at me and his smile had morphed into a wicked one and I knew what he was thinking.

"You better get your head out of the gutter buddy, I don't like Pam that much."

"I never thought I would miss you calling me buddy but I did…a lot." He said waggling his eyebrow at me.

I just shook my head in defeat knowing that no matter what I said he would find a way to turn it around on me. So I made my way towards the door.

"Lover where are you going, I thought you said we could hide in my office." He said making the most pathetic looking pouty face I had ever seen.

I sighed, "How about I give you a rain check on that one I'm in desperate need of a shower."

Eric was in front of me in vampire speed. "Why bother taking a shower if you're just going to get dirty all over again?" He said with the wickedest grin that I hadn't noticed I missed until recently. While I was in my "mood" lets call it for lack of a better word Eric would drive me home every night, sit with me as I ate, watched TV with me if I felt up to it, talked to me if I let him, he would stay with me until I fell asleep before flying back the Shreveport. And in that time he never once tried anything or made a lewd joke.

I didn't realize until just now how much I took my bad mood out on him, I silently blamed him for my situation and was punishing him for it. He must have known what I was doing and accepted my punishment without complaint. He even tried to explain to me what kept him from coming to me that night but I never let him. And here he was standing in front of me acting as if the past month and a half hadn't happened. He was standing there still willing to be with me. What did I ever do to deserve him?

I just shook my head feeling terrible and walked out to the cars. I sat in the passenger's seat of my new car and let Eric drive me home, he must have noticed the shift in my mood because he hadn't said a word since we got in. I was still thinking about how awfully I had treated him and couldn't stand the silence anymore; we were pulling up to my house when I broke down. "I'm so sorry Eric, I didn't mean to treat you so badly, I was so angry and I needed someone to blame and I blamed you when it wasn't your fault." I said sobbing.

"Lover, not only are we bonded but we are pledged and you still don't realize that I'm not going anywhere. You had been through a lot and were trying to cope; bad moods don't last forever so I waited. Though I fully expect to be rewarded for my patience." His waggling eyebrow showed me that his playful mood was back, but I couldn't help the tears that continued to fall from my eyes.

I didn't know what to say so I just kissed him, pushing all of my feelings for him through the bond I just hoped that he was getting the message that I was trying to get across. I was sorry, I had acted like an ass, and I cared about him more than I did anyone else.

He apparently got the message because he had me pressed up against the passenger side door in a matter of seconds and was kissing me hard in return. I was very tempted to spend the rest of the night with him in the car just so I wouldn't have to break off this kiss, but as I said before I was in desperate need of another shower.

Begrudgingly I pulled away from him, which was no easy feat seeing as I was pressed against the door. "Baby, what do you say we go inside, huh?" I had to scramble out of the car because I knew that if Eric was able to kiss me again that I would never leave that car again. I ran up the steps to the back door but of course Eric beat me there.

"I don't mind the chase lover, it makes the prize…sweeter."

I could feel my skin flushing all over; it was a sensation I thought I would never feel again.

"Well can I get a head start at least?" I knew I was playing with fire, but it was so worth it.

Eric stepped aside to let me unlock the door. I was ready to make a mad dash for my door but before I could take a step Eric grabbed me. He said, "Head starts over lover" before throwing me over his shoulder. I could help but let out a squeal and we both laughed but stopped abruptly when we saw Amelia. She was still cleaning, neither Eric nor I have seen her up and about for so long.

"Hey Eric, Sookie how are you guys?" Amelia said sounding almost like her old self.

"Witch, it is good to see that you are feeling better." That was the most Eric has spoken to Amelia over the past month and a half even though he has been here practically every night. Many of those nights were spent sandwiched between us on the couch watching TV. Due to the moods Amelia and I were experiencing at the time, there wasn't much conversation to be had.

"Thanks, Eric. Oh, and Sookie" she said bending down to see my face from its spot behind Eric, "I spoke to Greg Aubert, I'll be going back to work tomorrow." She gave me a weak smile, I knew she wasn't really feeling up to it but thought it was for the best.

"That's great. I'll probably drop by to say hi before heading over to Merlotte's."

We smiled brightly at each other as Eric started to move towards my door. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow then." I said before Eric closed my bedroom door behind us.

Eric unceremoniously plopped me on the bed and was hovering over me in an instant. He peppered my face and neck with sweet kisses that became increasingly urgent. "I've come to claim my prize." He said before attacking my mouth. I wanted nothing more than to continue but my paranoia about my current state of hygiene would not allow me, I guess that's what happens when your guy has a super human sense of smell.

"Eric sweetie, please I can't do this until after I shower, I just wont feel comfortable."

Eric just heaved an unnecessary sigh as he rolled off of me to lie on his back. I took the opportunity to literally run into the bathroom. I got into the shower planning on taking the fasted one humanly possible. In my haste I didn't hear Eric come into the bathroom, or the shower for that matter. I didn't see him either since I had my back to the shower curtain while reaching for my soap.

"Since you are desperate to get clean lover let me help you get to those hard to reach spots." He said while reaching past me for the soap.

I nearly jumped out of my skin, and was practically paralyzed but the intensity in Eric's eyes as he lathered his hands up and began to clean me. The cleaning didn't last long but that didn't mean that his hands stopped moving. His wet and soapy hands palmed my breasts as he began to knead them. His head dipped down as he sucked one of my nipples into his mouth.

I felt like I was going to explode when one of Eric's hands slipped down to "clean" my mound. I couldn't help but press myself into him as he stroked my folds and entered me with his fingers.

I couldn't take it any more. "Please" was all I could manage to strangle out. With that Eric put both of his hands behind my legs lifting me up and pressing my back against the wall of the shower stall. He released my breast from his mouth and started to kiss his way up my body. I gasped as he gently scraped his fangs along my neck before kissing it. I never wanted to be bitten so much in my life.

He continued to blaze a trail of kisses along my jaw, to my mouth. I was so eager for him at this point that I couldn't stop myself from shivering despite the continuous spray of warm water. We kissed and his tongue entered my mouth as he entered me. I couldn't help but scream out from the pleasure of it.

I hadn't realized how much I missed being with him this way. Bond or no bond this was right. I can't believed I wasted so much time being mad at this man for something that was not his fault.

Eric's movements were torturously slow I couldn't take it; I needed as much of him as I could get…now. I tried to meet his thrusts but he held my hips firmly against the wall. Frustrated with his pace I reached down in between us and began to rub my fingers against my numb, to help to relive some of my tension.

But Eric was having none of it, he took booth of my hands and held them above my head in one of his large ones, and firmly pressed his body against mine effectively restricting my movement. "Lover, I have waited for so long. It is now your turn. To. Be. Patient." He said emphasizing his last words with deep, hard thrusts. I could not remember ever being so turned on in my life.

"Oh God, please Eric, Bite me." Even to do that he made me wait. He slowly licked and kissed along my pulse point. Finally he bit down and I came screaming his name.

"Oh, fuck Eric. I love you so fucking much." The words just came tumbling out. I had no control over them.

Eric stopped drinking from me and looked up to meet my eyes. I was hoping that he didn't hear me but obviously he did. He just stared at me for a moment searching my eyes for something. I figured I had nothing to lose so I pushed my love for him through the bond and was surprised when I felt a rush of love in return.

Eric smiled, my blood dripping down his mouth. "I love you too, Sookie."

I had never felt as happy as I felt in that moment. Immediately all questions and doubts I've had about this man over the past few years were erased. I knew the bond did nothing but amplify existing feelings and act as a conduit between us by which we feel each other's emotions.

We just stood there for a while smiling at one another like a couple of fools. We must have used up all of the hot water because it suddenly freezing. I was suddenly pulled out of my trance like state, which pulled Eric out of his as well. He turned the water off and got a towel and dried us off. He wrapped me up in the towel and carried me to the bed.

He laid me down gently before kissing me. We have kissed before but this was different, it was like having a cool drink of water after being stranded in the desert for years. We pushed our love for one another back and forth in the bond and I never felt such peace in my life. We spent the rest of the night showing each other exactly how we loved one another.

A/N: So what did you think? This was my foray into lemons so I hope I didn't mess it up too bad. All feedback is welcomed; questions, comments, and suggestions will be greatly appreciated.