By popular demand...
Sam Was a Teenage Girly Girl
Chapter One; The Science Fair
Carly, Sam, and Freddie stood in Schneider High's gym, which had been turned into the hall for the annual Science Exposition. Hundreds of cardboard stands baring various unique papers and experiments.
"These are supposed to be the best of the country," Carly declared, desperate to amuze her friends. "That's cool, right?"
"Not really," Sam replied, walking forward. "Oh...something's upsetting my stomach." The blond walked forward, holding her queezy belly. Suddenly, she bent down and let out a loud belch, her mouth wide open and uncovered. "There it went." Several visiting students showed their disgust at the girl. However, it was nothing new for Sam.
"Nice," Freddie sarcastically said, not surprised in the least.
"Okay," Carly said, wanting to change the subject. "Let's check out some of the projects."
"Whatever," Sam said, following the brunette. As always, the teenager wore a bored look on her face. Her long, thickly-curled hair swayed back and forth as she walked, partially covering her gray sweatshirt and cargo pants. "This is so boring. Why are we even here?"
"The school asked us to show this on iCarly," Carly answered, pulling out her camquarter and filming several of the exhibits. "Even you have to admit some of this stuff is cool."
"Not really," Sam said, looking at two booths dedicated to the growth of mold. "Hey, you wanna hit Rib Hut after this is over?"
"That place is disgusting," Carly replied. "I can't believe you like it there. The food makes a huge mess, the people are slobs, and a fight always breaks out."
"Hey, I kicked butt last week," Sam defended herself. "Hey, if you don't wanna go, it's not a big deal. You want me to bring you a dogie bag?"
"Um, thanks but no, thanks," Carly answered, trying to be polite. The last time Sam tried to save anything from Rib Hut, it ate through the bag, and stunk up the apartment for weeks. "You know...nothing."
"What?" Sam asked, showing more ambition.
"Nothing," Carly replied. "Never mind."
"Tell me or I'll give you one of my wet willies," Sam threatened. "I'm not kidding."
"Fine," the brunette gave in. "It's just...you don't really act like a girl. It's just a little weird."
"Not for me," Sam responded, obviously not bothered. "What's so great about being a frilly, pretty little doll? Not that it doesn't work for you." The girl quickly fixed her sentence, not wanting to insult her friend.
"...Thanks," Carly replied, somewhat distraught. "Look, just maybe..."
"Hello," greeted a dark-haired girl with complicated pig tails and glasses. "My name is Quinn Pensky. Are the girls from iCarly? Oh, it's such an honor to meet you. Would you like to see my project?"
"Sure, what is it?" Carly asked, showing interest.
"Well, it's a molecular distortion device," Quinn explained, pointing to a large, silver machine generating pink electricity from two conductors. "It has the ability to alter the molecular structure, composition, or anything else about any object. It can turn an apple blue...A ninety year-old man into a five year old girl. It can also alter cerebral functions...The possibilities are practically endless."
"Wow," Carly replied. "Can you demonstrate it for us?" The girl positioned her camquarter.
"Certainly," the PCA student answered. "Do you have anything I can use?"
"Here," Sam said, putting a book on Quinn's counter. "I won't need this."
"Isn't that Freddie's..." Carly began.
"Here we go," Quinn said, unintentionally interrupting the brunette. "I'll transform this simple text book into...a pair of Elton John sunglasses." Putting on her goggles, the girl pulled a lever, and watched a proton ray fire at Freddie's geometry book, and turn it into a green pair of star-shaped sunglasses.
"Wow," Sam replied, picking up the glasses and putting them over her eyes. "Math never looked so cool."
"Be careful," Quinn instructed. "She should wait until those cool down."
"Nah, it's fine," the blond replied, holding the glasses up to one of the lights. "This is pretty cool. Hey, one of these nods is loose." Reaching forward, Sam attempted to adjust one of the conductors on the girl's machine.
"Wait!" Quinn shrieked, growing terrified. "Don't touch those! The power is still..." Unknown to Sam, the distortion device continuously pulled out energy from the air when it was activated. This energy's effects, unless altered by the control panel, proved time and time again to be unstable and unpredictable.
"Whoa!" the blond girl shrieked, feeling a jolt of electricity course through her body. Then, she was flung back, and landed back-first on the floor. Things began to feel different...not normal. "W-where am I?"
"Sam, are you okay?" Carly asked, wanting to hold the girl's hand. Despite her natural compassion, the girl knew touching Sam could prove lethal if the electricity was still flowing through her. "Is everything alright?"
The blond didn't answer. Her eyes closed, and her head dropped to the left.
"Please try to relax," Quinn said, putting her hand on Carly's shoulder.
"Are you crazy?" the brunette cried, snapping her head back towards Quinn. "Sam's organs could be turned into butter right now! Would it kill you scientists to give a care about human life for once?"
Quinn stood still, deeply hurt by Carly's words. Would it kill you scientists...Care...For once? Those words echoed viciously in the girl's mind.
"Sam? Sam!" Carly cried. Sam's my best friend, she told herself. She's all I have. "Come on."
Sam's head bobbed to one side, then her eyes opened. "What happened?" she asked, trying to lift herself up.
"Just take it easy," Carly replied, gently easing her friend back onto the gym floor. "You're fine now."
"The ray hasn't seemed to have affected you," Quinn said. "But just to be sure, I should take a blood sample. Do you mind?"
"I hate needles," Sam moaned, her head pounding like a drum in her skull.
"Just hold still," Carly said, taking Sam's hand. "Now relax...Relax." Quinn pulled out a needle from her barely school-authorized utility belt, flicked its sterilized tip, then gently stuck it into Sam's vein. The girl let out a sharp, brief wince of pain. Blood rushed into the plastic tube as the bespeculated girl pulled the handle back.
"Okay," Quinn said, trying to keep her voice gentle. "I'll send an e-mail if there are any complications. I'm really sorry about this. Um,... may I have the...the glasses back, please?" Weakly, Sam handed the PCA student the sunglasses, her eyes still closed. Looking up at Carly, the girl swallowed hard. "I'm really sorry." With that, the teenager departed.
"It's okay, Sam," Carly whispered, gently stroking her friend's hair. "It's okay."
After dropping her off at her apartment, Carly tucked Sam into her bed, then went back to her and Spencer's room at Sam's request. Taking a deep breath, the blond felt her closed eyes grow heavy. "What a day," she whispered. Thinking back, Sam began to feel weird about the way she belched in front of everybody. However, her mind was tired, and she soon faded into slumber.
Hours after hours faded away. Finally, the girl woke up bright and early, feeling rested and at ease. Raising up in her bed, Sam stretched her arms out towards the sky, and gently took a breath. "Mmm," she gently moaned, her voice sweet. After taking a shower, Sam wrapped herself in a pink towel, and combed out her long hair in front of a mirror. "La la la la," she sang to herself, watching her long locks straighten, wearing lines from the comb. Oncer her hair was done, the girl smelled under her arm, and was somewhat disgusted.
Spritzing some perfume she borrowed from her sister on her under arms, Sam smelled her new, fresh scent. With that done, the girl sat down in front of a mirror in her room and pulled out some makeup. Slowly, gracefully, she applied some pink eye shadow, then brushed her long lashes with mascara. Seeing her lengthened lashes, Sam puckered her lips and batted them several times, before letting out a laugh at her joke. The girl painted her lips with light red lipstick, then looked at different earrings. Finally, she decided on some diamond-styled buds. Sam then rubbed a little blush on her cheeks, fluffed her hair, then went to pick out her clothes.
Usually, the girl's wardrobe consisted of baggy clothing, sweats, and dark colors. However, things felt kind of different today. Pink felt good. Maybe some blue jeans? How about those purple Mary-Janes that have been sitting in the closet? After getting dressed, Sam looked at herself in the mirror. "Pretty," she said, satisfied with her work. Once she was prepped, the teenager skipped out the door, making her way to school.
Meanwhile, in PCA, just outside of town, Quinn sat at her desk, studying a slide. The slide contained a sample of Sam's blood after the incident.
"Quinn," Zoey called from the doorway. "You coming to breakfast?"
"...In a minute," Quinn answered, not looking away from the plasma sample. Through her corrective glasses and the intensive microscopic lenses, the girl studied the micro-organisms living insid the blood. They moved around slowly, seeming normal. However, Quinn remained uneasy.