I've added a few adjustments here and there to the story, I would delete but alas, I can't. I have an attachment to this rather unpopular pairing you see.
Inspiration: The lack of Suigetsu and Karin fanfics.
I do not own the characters.
Genre: So much crack it hurts.
"Suigetsu, get your lazy ass off the ground, why must stop walking every five fucking minutes", a frustrated Karin told her resting team mate.
"Shut your trap four eyes, I'm thirsty, so do your duty as a women and", Suigetsu raised his bottle in Karin's direction, "get me some water".
Karin ran forward and gave Suigetsu a punch to the head and water splattered all over Jugo.
"Uh-oh", Suigetsu went as Jugo morphed into a blood-thirsty monster.
"I'll kill you both! Blood, I need blood on my hands", Jugo yelled.
"You know", Suigetsu tipped his head thoughtfully to the side, "It's no wonder why Jugo can't get a girl".
"You bastard, help me", Karin yelped as she tried to hold back the stampeding Jugo.
Sasuke came forward, switching his eyes to the sharingan state. Soon after Jugo became the mildmannered person he was. Sasuke turned around to face Suigetsu.
"I said play nice, didn't I", Sasuke said.
Karin stuck her tongue out. Suigetsu took a sip of water.
"But Sasuke, she started it and by the way, why does that bitch have to be part of your team, she does nothing", Suigetsu paused,"On the other hand, she's a very good nagger".
Water splashed unto Sasuke as Karin once again punched Suigetsu.
"Watch it, Water Boy", she went, straightening her glasses.
"Play nice, Suigetsu", Sasuke repeated as Suigetsu opened his mouth to retort.
"Fine, but only 'cause you said so", Suigetsu glanced at Karin, "So you didn't win, Karin".
He winked at her and she stomped her foot in reply.
"Cheeky bastard", she responded.
"Suigetsu...", came the growl from behind him.
"I know, I know".
Team Hebi walked through the desert for about a mile before they reached a village.
"All right, now we can take a break now", Suigetsu said, sitting on a bench with a happy sigh.
"Water Boy, stop being lazy, let's go find a hotel, while Jugo and Sasuke get us some food".
"Ooooo", Suigetsu went, "Karin wants me to help her find a hotel".
Karin's response was to give him a well deserved punch to the face.
"Not the sexy face, Four-Eyes. I need that!", Suigetsu yelped.
Team Hebi gathered at the hotel, each of them glad that they were finally going to get a break. They gathered in Sasuke's room to eat.
"Ugh, Suigetsu, you fucking idiot", Karin yelled.
"A lady should watch what comes out of her mouth", Suigetsu paused, "then again you're not a lady so...", Suigetsu shrugged.
Sasuke stared at the arguing duo and decided to stop the fight before it got predictably worse.
"Suigetsu, Karin, you know I'm the leader of this team right?", Sasuke cut in.
"Ya, ya, we do", Suigetsu sighed, his jagged teeth, layered over his lower lip in a frown.
"Yes, Sasuke", cooed Karin, brushing a strand out out of her eyes which were fluttering in an attempt to be seductive.
"Obvious", Suigetsu muttered under his breath. Karin frowned.
"I want the two of you to kiss each other", Sasuke went on.
"What!", Karin and Suigetsu said together,
"Do. It. Now", Sasuke went calmly, his eyes switching to the deadly sharingan mode.
"Fine", the two said frightened.
"Here, birdy, birdy", went Jugo, cooing at a little Bluebird at the window.
Karin and Suigetsu reluctantly leaned forward, finally after minutes passing by, they kissed. When they pulled away, their eyes were wide, the kiss was intoxicating, delicious and each wanted more... and both of them didn't like that one bit.
"Jugo, you and I are going out to get supplies", Sasuke said, "Karin, Suigetsu, you stay here and don't cause any trouble".
Sasuke left with Jugo leaving Karin and Suigetsu alone, together.
"Okay, Water Boy, you better fucking help me clean this mess", Karin said nervously, breaking the tension. Suigetsu glanced at her coolly, judged the kiss in his mind and smirked.
"Suigetsu, just what the hell are you smirking for", Karin asked.
Suigetsu slammed Karin against the wall in response
"The hell, quit playing around you fuckt-".
Karin found herself in a lip lock with the person she hated the most and she well... liked it.
"Karin", Suigetsu growled in a throaty voice as he bit Karin's neck, then he sucked on the bruise.
Karin found his voice, super sexy, she didn't like this one bit.
"Quit fucking doing this", Karin yelped, waving her arms.
Suigetsu sighed, " You know when we kissed earlier, I felt something and you felt it too, didn't you?", he observed.
"So?".
"So, let's have some fun".
Karin glanced at him, then the hotel room.
"Just this once, okay you ass-".
Suigetsu kissed her, Karin felt her lips open, unbidden, soon Karin and Suigetsu were battling with their tounges, they twisted and twirled against each other, neither side giving up the battle for dominance, they pulled apart- a draw.
As Suigetsu pushed Karin unto the bed, he turned the tips of his pale, long hair to water. He planted kisses on Karin's neck, his water tipped hair teasing her fiery skin.
"Suigetsu, just what are you doing", Karin asked in a pissed off voice.
Suigetsu smirked and in slow lazy strokes, he licked Karin's neck, every once in awhile giving it a nick, then licked at the wound as if in apology.
Karin turned, moving herself up and pushing Suigetsu down, so now she was on top. She stared at his face. His face. His cheeks-nose-lips-eyes, even his shark teeth she was seeing in a different light.
Her hands reached for Suigetsu's shirt and she ripped it off him.
Suigetsu raised a brow, "In a hurry, are we?", he asked.
"Shut up you-", she cut off in a moan as a slick wetness trickled over her arms.
Suigetsu had turned his body into an icy zone, the water went everywhere, they cooled her aching breast but soon after a burning mouth would plant itself on her nipples, down her neck the water went, teasing at the waistband of her shorts.
Suigetsu materialized a wicked smile planted on his lips. Karin tipped her hand in question. He slipped Karin's shorts off and soon after her underwear. He dipped his head between her legs and gave her thighs a teasing lick. Karin buckled, mewling in pleasure.
"B-bastard, what are you do-", once again Karin cut off in a moan as Suigetsu licked his way up her thighs and dipped his head directly between her legs, edging his tounge into Karin's sensitive spot. She pushed forward bringing her hips closer to Suigetsu's lips. Hands that had been previously tugging, pulling at Suigetsu's pale strands, calmed themselves as he licked and tasted the inside of her, wiggling his tongue into her.
"B-bastard", Karin muttered.
She moaned as Suigets's hands trailed up, playing with perky breasts.
"I know you like it".
Karin smirked, if Suigetsu thought he was going to win, he was dead wrong.
She tugged at the waistband of his pants, pulling them off and threw them to the side, his underwear followed soon after. She grabbed his manhood, smirking.
"You bigger then I though, Water Boy"
"Hmph, you must be happy, right Karin", he winked.
Karin response was to give his length a lick, and another and another, teasing Suigetsu.
"B-bitch", it was Suigetsu's turn to moan.
Karin smirked and stuck him in her mouth capturing him between his lips and sucked gently, with her hands she played with his balls, Suigetsu moaned, gripping the bed sheets tightly.
"Would, you look at that, look who's writhing around now", Karin smirked.
"Shut up".
Karin sucked him gently then moved faster, pumping him in her mouth faster, in and out.
"Hey, Karin, I want to do something", Suigetsu said, stopping her with reluctant hands.
"Oh", she went realizing what he meatn as he placed himself in front of her.
"You ready?". Without waiting for Karin's response he entered, her once then twice. She cried out, pulling at Suigestu's hair.
"Easy, just follow me".
Soon they set a pace, they both found pleasurable.
"Well, how was it Four-Eyes", Suigestu asked with a smirk.
"It was... actually great... who knew you were good at this".
"Hm".
"Suigetsu?"
"What?".
"Let's do this again sometime".
Suigetsu grinned, brushing Karin's red hair from her eyes. She put her head on Suigetsu's chest.
"Sure."
They soon fell asleep, grinning at the moment of a truce.
Meanwhile...
"Jugo, let's go back to the hotel", Sasuke went, walking towards the hotel.
"Sure", was Jugo's reply as he waved goodbye at the deer he had befriended.
"I hope they didn't cause any... trouble", Sasuke smirked.
The two of Team Hebi walked into the hotel as the sun steadily set behind them.