Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS and if I did Tony and Ziva would have gotten together like I had wished not beating around the bush like they are.

A.N I would like to thank Nicole my friend who convinced me that I should post this and let others check it out!! I also added some quotes from the show!

Love came do harm

"But it's the truth even though in didn't happen," Senior Special Agent Tony of the NCIS Washington thought to himself. Tony had worked with many people thought his life; his job had caused him much pain as well as a new thought in life and what it has to give. He had worked with his boss, Special Agent Gibbs and resident forensic scientist Abby for some years before Kate had entered the picture then followed by McGee or known as 'probie'. Tony had taken a liking to Kate right away, playing his charms on her but there was nothing more to it other than the two flirting. Kate and Tony were like siblings at rivalry, wanting Gibbs approval and notice.

Two years later Kate had been killed by Ari an ex-Mossad agent turn terrorist who had a thing about Gibbs. Officially Gibbs had killed Ari but it wasn't till later that the team found out that it was Ziva who had killed Ari her half brother in order to save Gibbs.

Tony's new partner Mossad liaison Officer, Agent Ziva had arrived from Tele Aviv to replace Kate at Director Jen Shepard's orders. At the time the relationship status of Ziva and Ari were not known by the team except for Gibbs. Everyone including the always cheery Abby had been cold to Ziva; all they could see was another agent there to replace Kate. It was McGee whom made a gesture to Ziva being the only one in the team to have known Kate for the shortest amount of time. Tony was last of them; Kate and Tony had this bond that was sometimes mistaken as passion for each other but it was protectiveness, caring and loving.

It was not until Director Shepard had asked them to be undercover married assassins that Tony had started to get use to and trust Ziva. All the hate was gone but a different feeling had come replacing it. It was different to what he had for Kate; more lust, love and attraction, not that Kate wasn't pretty but Ziva had something else not describable. After the undercover mission Tony had bonded with Ziva more often the two having movie nights at his place since Ziva had been new to America.

Suddenly Tony was pulled into an undercover operation by the Director, chasing a known arms dealer by the name of Rene Benoit alias La Grennouille 'La Frog'. Tony had pretended to be the boyfriend of La Frog's daughter Jeanne Benoit to get information. This had taken a toll within the office and especially with Ziva his partner.

After a near death experience Tony revealed his true identity to Jeanne only for her to run away, his heart was crushed; some of him had gotten used to him being loved, while he himself had fallen for her. The relationship between Tony and Ziva had suffered, with Ziva questioning his trust in her. Time went on and the relationship grew again, even to new prospects.

Once again tragedy struck the team; Director Shepard was due to show at a funeral in Los Angeles, Tony and Ziva was sent to follow her like bodyguards. After the funeral Jen had told them to relax and that she was just going around for a bit. Tony and Ziva had taken the advice even with some disgruntle arguments, when the director had not shown at the time she promised Tony and Ziva decided to follow. It had taken them to an outskirt desert restaurant where inside they had found the Director and three other armed men dead. Arriving back to Washington, Tony had begun drinking heavily; thinking that he was the reason the Director was dead. Tony had insisted at the time that he and Ziva spend their time away from the Director when Ziva had insisted that they should stay close to Jen just in case of an emergency. In the end it was Ziva who had caved for the Tony charms.

As a result the team's new Director Leon Vance had split them up, using Jen's death as the reason but was seeking a mole in NCIS. Tony was stationed on a big Navel ship due to leave shore, McGee had been moved to the cyber crime unit downstairs, Ziva was being deported back to Israel and Gibbs was in charge of a new team. The mole was sorted out and it was time to bring the team back. Everyone had changed McGee had grown, Tony had matured and Ziva had softened.

In the past two months life for Tony had been in a whirl wind from killing his partner's boyfriend whom was a betrayed Mossad agent in self defense to rescuing his partner and the love of his life even if he didn't know it.

Two months ago

Tony followed his partner into a bar after she had received a phone call and ran out of the bullpen irruptively. Once at the bar Tony had kept an eye on Ziva, occasionally glancing at her mesmerizing her until a man had arrived. The unknown man had kissed Ziva and she had done nothing to say his actions were uncalled for. Feeling a pang in his heart Tony had left contempt that his feeling for Ziva were never suppose to be there, she never felt for him the same way as he did for her; they were partners and that his boss Special Agent Gibbs had forbid any interoffice relationship by setting rule number 12: Never date a coworker.

End

Ziva had started a secret relationship with Michael Rivkin, a Mossad Agent in which she had met while over in Tele Aviv. Tony had come to understand that Ziva had no time for him anymore and that she was happy for once in her life.

The relationship between Michael and Ziva had become known to the rest of the team when Rivkin had killed a US Agent. Though the incident had deemed as an accident, Tony had dug further into the past. He had found out that it was not Rivkin's first killing and that more had been cover up because of his status as a Mossad Agent.

One night Tony had decided that the life of his partner was endangered, her father had sent Michael to clean up the mess that Ari had started years ago. Once at her apartment door, Tony had found it ajar. Pulling out his service weapon he had entered the building, cautiously surveying the area around him. Stepping inside, Michael lunged at him, knocking the gun out of his hands. A battle had started between the two men; finally Tony had gotten the better hand and had shot Rivkin several times. It was only then that Ziva had came running in the door with her weapon; Tony had broken his arm but all Ziva had cared about was Rivkin.

Rivkin's death had been a shock to the team but also to the Director of Mossad, Ziva's father. Bonds were nearly broken, friendships were destroyed; Ziva had blamed Tony for the death of Michael and had retracted from the people she called family. Director Leon, Gibbs and Tony had escorted Lisa back home to Tele Aviv for the sole purpose of Director Eli of Mossad had the chance to question Tony about the incident.

Tony was left in the interrogation room with Director Eli while Gibbs and Director Leon were outside watching on camera. Tony had started to joke around, something he commonly did when buying time or was anxious.

Flashback

"You had attacked Officer Rivkin intentionally", Eli had stated.

"It was kill or be killed", Tony answered back.

"If that were true you would not be here."

"You wouldn't mind that would you. Do you send all your rouge agents to DC and make it our mess? I should not be surprised at Michael, since you did the same to Ari your son. Speaking of family, what kind of father sends an out of control assassin at his own daughter? What kind of headquarters are you running here? Does everyone just run around doing whatever they please?" Tony retorted. "They do as I say," Eli hissed as he grabbed Tony's neck.

"Rivkin?"

"Always," Eli had confidently stated.

With that Tony looked into the camera knowing that he had finally won the battle over the feisty Director.

End

Tony, Gibbs and Leon had traveled back to DC without Ziva who had lost trust and belief in the team. Little did she know that her father was behind the whole operation in keeping her behind back in Tele Aviv.

Kidnapped by Saleem when her father sent her on a ship to finish Michael's job; Ziva was held in Somalia as a captive. She was interrogated and tortured for information on NCIS. Holding off everyday, she did not comply with their demands. Honestly Ziva had thought her life was over. Her father had sent her on a suicide mission, she had pushed her only real family away and now there was no-one to save her. It had been weeks now; Ziva had given up hope and with no food, she started to lose her strength.

Back in DC

Tony walked back into the bullpen with McGee, Ducky and Abby waiting for them. Abby ran up to him and jumped up for a hug, managing with a broken arm Tony barely stood.

"So where is Ziva?" Abby asked.

"She's not here." Tommy answered.

"So she's parking the car?"

"No she didn't come home," Tony said sadly.

As soon as Tony had said that Gibbs had chosen that moment to walk into the room, taking the pressure off of Tony. Knowing that Tony was going to blame himself for what happen, Gibbs sends him home so he could rest and recover.

First week back Tony had been heavily drinking, pushing him into work and had shut down from everyone around him. He had stop boasting about his late nights but not going out at all. Gibbs had seen the change in his once wisecrack senior agent becomes depressed and remote from the rest. Everyone had seen the change, no more smiles, jokes just a hard working agent. I was good in a way for the agency but terrible for the team.

Weeks later, Tony could not take it anymore and had just called it quits; he needed to find Ziva. News had said that Ziva had been lost at sea near Somalia, drowned when the ship had gone down. Tony had spent day and night finding clues with Abby, anything unusual from the last whereabouts of Ziva. Tony had refused to believe that Ziva was dead at first, saying that she was his crazy ninja and his crazy ninja never died without a fight. Ever night he would go home and drink until he passed out, could bare all the nightmares that haunted him; he blamed himself for her death.

After much tracking around the area they had found an inconsistency; much to their delight there was daily shipment of Caf-Pow from America to a place in Somalia known for its terrorist cells. To Tony it was a chance to kill the man responsible for the death of his best friend and partner. Gibbs, McGee and Tony left DC to avenge their family but most importantly the love of Tony's life.

Posing as American's Tony and McGee had purposely been captured so that they could kill Ziva's captors. Immediately McGee had fought back, pretending to pass out while a punch was thrown towards him. Tony had then been tied to a chair and tortured for information; he did not comply.

In a Cell

Tied to a chair Tony had been poked and prodded by Saleem on how his whereabouts had been known.

"What are you doing here, are you trying to Shut down my organization?" Saleem had demanded.

"Who knows maybe I'm here just for fun." Tony answered calmly. Tony was willing to give up his life so that he could kill the man who had harm Ziva. He had nothing in life to look forward to anymore, content with that he was willing to suffer.

Annoyed with Tony's constant antics Saleem knew that he had others on his team asked, "Where is the rest of your team?"

"I don't care about your team; I don't care about my team." Tony stated truthfully.

"So I ask again, what are you doing here?" Saleem forcefully said.

"Vengeance."

With truth serum injected into his body Tony could no longer hold back the information, only denying vital clues.

"So tell me about your team." Saleem had asked.

"Our team consists of a gang of four; tight knit. Well there's my partner McGee, big brain and small muscles. There's our team leader, the always fearless Special Agent Gibbs who was also a marine sniper." Tony had said willingly.

"And the fourth member of your team?" Saleem prodded.

Shaking his head, Tony had struggled to find the right words to describe the situation. "Lost her." He finally said.

"Her?"

"Yeah for the last four years that spot had been filled by Mossad liaison Officer Ziva and now she's dead too."

"Mossad hey. Are you sure that I killed her then?"

"Yeah, if I could drag her back; I'd do it in a heartbeat." Tony sighed.

"How did you find me anyway?" Saleem mused.

"Well that was easy. You couldn't keep away from the caffeine could you? You had to have your Caf-Pow."

Annoyed with the answer, Saleem stalked out of the room leaving Tony and McGee for a little talk. Coming back, Saleem had someone with a bag put over their head dragged in behind him.

"One of you will tell me all about NCIS operative locations while the other dies. I'll give you a minute to chose."

With that he lifts the bag from the head and leaves the room.

Once again Tony was left stunned; in front of him was Ziva, the woman who had been dead. His heart fluttered with joy but remembering Salem's demand had again died down. All he had to do was wait and hope that Saleem does not change his motives and move them somewhere else. Mentioning his plan to a stunned Ziva, she had opted that he was to let her die so he could save himself.

Ziva was very stunned; Tony was the last person she had thought to come to her rescue. She had turned her back on him when he was trying to help her and now Tommy was going to die with her. It was all her fault she blamed herself.

"Out of everyone in the world who could have found me; it had to be you." Ziva said. Tony nodded in agreement. "You're welcome."

"You thought I was dead. Why are you here?" Ziva asked.

What Tony really wanted to say was that he loved her and missed her all he could muster up was, "I couldn't live without you, I guess."

Saleem entered the room demanding that one of them were to give up the information. Stepping closer to Tony, knowing that he was more likely to break Saleem had not seen what was coming to him.

Tony had taunted Saleem, but Saleems narrow mind could not remember all the facts that Tony had given. Saleem had a gun pointed at McGee with all intentios of shooting him.

"Stop, stop there's something I haven't told you yet!' Tony yelled.

"Huh and what is that?" Saleem questioned.

"I told you about the brains, I told you about the guts, I told you about the muscle, the scientist, the politician the leader, I told you about every member of the team except myself; the part I play."

'Which is?" Salleem asked with curiosity.

"I am the wildcard, I am the guy that looks at the reality in front of him and refuses to accept it. Like right now I should be terrified right but I'm not bacause I can't stop thinking about that movie True Lies; you know where Arnie's strapped to the chair and shot with truth serum, he picks his cuffs and kills everybody. You have thirty seconds to live Saleem." Tony answered.

"Huh…You're still bounded, you lying.'

"I can't lie….And I didn't say I was the one that was going to kill you. Remember when I told you my boss was a sniper?"

With that a bullet had penetrated the window and killed Saleem. Knowing that that was Gibbs outside, McGee had got up and untied Tony and Ziva. Supporting each other they had left the area with Gibbs close behind monitoring their safety.

Back home and safe from all harm, Tony had really wanted to tell Ziva his true feeling for her but had decided against it since he didn't want her running off again. Happy with that Tony had been rather nice to his co-worker and partner. He made a promise to himself, no more late nights, one night stand but more mature and ready to be there when Ziva needed him.

The events that had ensued had opened Tony's eyes to something new; love. When he said that he love Jeanne, I wasn't the same, I was like saying because he had to but with Ziva he felt something he hadn't before felt. This wonderful feeling that made everything disappears in his mind except Ziva.

Yelling off the top of the building, "I love you Lisa. I will forever until I die." That was the truth even tough he hadn't told her that yet. Tony was content with watching and admiring Ziva from afar than admitting his feelings anfd getting rejected; he couldn't handle that so he decided to let everyone else know except her. Not knowing Ziva was standing behind the door listening to every word that Tony had yelled off the building. She was smiling, it was nice hearing those words come out of Tony, and maybe they could start something?

The End???

Please review and tell me whether I should continue this or not!!!

This is my first NCIS fanfic so tell me what you think of it!