Title: Prisoners
Summary: "I did NOT run around like a headless chicken, I made well-planned tactical manouevres." KabuSakuSasu. Oneshot. SEQUEL TO DIPLOMACY.
Warnings: Language, worrying choice of pairing, too-textured writing, pathetic lack of crack, more language... and the ever-present DUNGEON.
A/N: This goes out to all the amazing people who reviewed and supported Diplomacy, and waited so long for a sequel. I am in your debt.
Special thanks to Kyra, for typing in all caps when I said the word 'sequel'. Twice.
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The Ten Rules of Breaking Out Of Prison
by Kabuto Yakushi
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Rule #1
Ensure you are in solitary confinement.
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"You are unbelievable, Yakushi," Sakura Haruno spat, shaking her pink head.
"I have that effect on most women."
She crossed her arms over her black ANBU jumpsuit and glared. "You really are a bastard." Her posture was stiff with condemnation.
"I can't really tell you for sure, can I?" he rhetorically raised one silver eyebrow. Her hard green eyes sparkled with animosity in the otherwise-dull surroundings; they resembled polished emeralds.
Her tone was blunter than a rock when she replied. "Oh yeah, I forgot. You don't have real parents."
Oh, that stung.
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Rule #2
If solitary is not an option, make sure company is on your side.
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"Why the hell are you in here?" he demanded, leaning on the wall of the dungeon. Because, yes, it was a dungeon -- in very much the same vein as their last haunt. Stone walls and slightly mouldy sawdust all the way. A prison cell, by any other name, is still...
"The f*ck should I know?" Sakura shot back, her posture stiff and angry. "Short on room, maybe?"
"Just throw the traitors in together and hope they kill each other before anybody else has to," Kabuto mused. "How efficient of Tsunade-sama to do something like that."
Sakura bristled further at the 'T' word. "Unlike you, I didn't abandon my village --"
"Oh, so running off in the middle of the night without notice doesn't count as abandonment, now?" he replied, showing a trace of sardonic humour. How much she hated to think of it like that, he already knew.
"Your presence is unbearable. Don't talk to me."
Well, that didn't go well at all.
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Rule #3
Always. Bring. Duct tape.
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"I think this isn't as bad as you make out," Kabuto said finally, trying to make her break her spiky, anger-filled silence. It was becoming uncomfortable.
"Oh, you THINK so, genius?" Sakura growled, seizing him by the collar. Better a violent reaction than nothing at all. Kabuto grinned slyly at her sudden physical contact.
"Easy, Haruno, I know you're dying to tear my shirt off, like last time..."
Sakura thrust him away from her immediately, dismissing his comment with a disgusted flick of her hair. "You're gross."
Beat.
"Last time was a fluke. But it happening twice is just a bad freaking habit," she grumbled. "Besides, if you'll remember correctly, I saved your ass last time."
"I'm assuming you've got no ace in the hole this time?" coming from him, it seemed like a genuine (hopeful) question, but Sakura shook her head in defeat. She didn't even bother talking to him any more.
"Well, do you have any duct tape?"
She looked at him as if he were slightly nuts. "Yeah, of course. Right here in my pocket." Her ANBU outfit, sans black utility belt, was remarkably pocket-free.
"Great. You don't have to be sarcastic about it," he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
"Oh, I do."
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Rule #4
Know your surroundings as thoroughly and clearly as possible.
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Kabuto stood on tiptoe to peer out of the tiny, barred window of the cell's door. The heavy, wooden, locked shut door. "Where the hell does this corridor go? Which way is out?"
"Maybe you should've paid attention on the way in," she snapped, looking bitter.
"Maybe if they hadn't put a bag over my head, I would've," Kabuto retorted. Sakura seemed to have a bright idea at that point, which made him very worried.
"I have a good idea," Sakura said merrily, stepping to his side so that her face was lit by the corridor's torchlight.
"I'm worried."
"Well, maybe if you couldn't see, you could remember the way out better?" she suggested, and the cunning expression on her face finally struck home. Kabuto started to protest.
"That's not a good idea --"
Sakura pulled his round spectacles off the bridge of his nose and tossed them carelessly over her shoulder. Kabuto heard them whistle through the air...
Then hit the wall...
And the glass in the frames shatter into a gazillion pieces.
He winced.
Not again.
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Rule #5
Don't waste energy or crucial time.
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"I can't believe you did that. Again."
Sakura shrugged, although to his eyes it was just a blurry movement in the too-dim light. She paced to the other end of the room and sat down on the bench, seeming satisfied with herself. He could swear she was smirking. Goddamn Uchiha must've taught her that.
"Hell, what is with you?" he complained, sliding down to sit with his back against the door, directly opposite her.
"Well, what is with your hair?" Sakura said pickily, ignoring his annoying comments. In fact, she'd decided that everything about him annoyed her, but it made perfect sense to go down the list one item at a time. "It's not even tied up anymore. Are you trying to look sexy, or something?"
Kabuto rolled his eyes. "You seem to be forgetting that I dragged myself out of bed in the middle of the night when you started screaming and running around like a headless chicken. I didn't spend a lot of time worrying about my appearance."
"Well, that much is obvious."
Ugh. No-winner.
"Besides," Sakura continued patiently, as if explaining the bare facts of life to him. "I did not run around like a headless chicken, I made well-planned tactical manouevres."
"Yeah. Sure you did," he muttered. This was so going nowhere.
"You know," she said after a moment, tilting her head to one side to look at him. "There is one explanation."
"For what?"
"Your hair. You're prematurely greying and subsequently, balding, so you don't want to tie it up in case somebody spots the bald patches," Sakura theorized, thumbing her chin as she thought it over.
Kabuto palmed his face.
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Rule #6
Call in debts.
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"You know, Haruno, you probably owe me for that time I healed your battered ass."
"You know, Yakushi, you'd better not have touched my ass, or I'll kick yours."
Kabuto smirked. "As if I would. Uzumaki would have murdered me."
"Is that a hint of regret I detect?" Sakura prodded, raising her pink eyebrows. Not that he saw, of course; his vision was only getting worse without the specs.
"Don't flatter yourself," Kabuto shrugged, rubbing his sore eyes. "Your ass isn't that interesting."
"Can we please change the subject? Like, to the time where I saved you from certain death?" she rejoined, her eyes flashing.
"Is that a hint of regret I detect?" he replied coolly, mimicking her.
She was silent for a while after that.
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Rule #7
Get some rest. You're going to need it.
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When the debate seemed like it had finally died down for good, Kabuto found himself yawning. It had, after all, been hours since he'd been dragged from his bed in the middle of the night. There was no way of telling the time down here, but he guessed it was around eight in the morning. Breakfast time.
His stomach churned at the mere thought. Being cooped up within these walls seemed to make living a normal life impossible -- eating, or laughing, or sleeping deep enough to dream. For the first time he understood why the prisoners in the bowels of Orochimaru's fortress went crazy. They ticked down like a time bomb until one day, something broke inside of them, and they just couldn't stop screaming.
Remembering that sort of thing just made him feel sicker. But to his heart, this time, not his stomach. How long would they keep him in here before he, too, snapped? Two years? Three?
Kabuto mentally shook himself. These kinds of thoughts were bullshit; they weren't gonna help him out at all. He lay down on the less-than-accommodating straw that served as bedding in this hole, tucking his arm under his head.
Sakura watched him warily from across the room, even as his eyes closed. Her arms were still protectively crossed over her chest as she lounged back against the wall, her pale pink hair hanging in curtains around her face. Her own head was nodding, but she kept forcing her eyes open, in order to avoid any surprise moves on the traitor's part. He could be faking sleep, for all she knew.
It didn't seem like he was, however, at least by the soft light of the corridor outside. His arm was curled underneath his head like a pillow, silken silver hair falling in his eyes. His white undershirt was crinkled with everything they'd been through in the last few hours, but that was all gone from his face now. His gritted jaw had softened with sleep, all the tension and guile erased from his features. Holding nothing back.
As if.
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Rule #8
Always keep an ear open for opportunity.
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Resisting the urge to snort at her own ridiculous behaviour, Sakura tore her gaze from Kabuto's pale, finely cut features. What a waste of time, staying awake to keep an eye on him. She should be sleeping, too. It wasn't like Yakushi was going to wake up and strangle her -- even if she didn't trust him, he wasn't an idiot. What would he gain from doing something like that?
A bit of peace and quiet? answered a snarky little voice inside her head that sounded suspiciously like her despised cellmate. She bared her teeth at it, just a little. So that it knew who was running this show.
"I'm not some sort of irrational lunatic, right?" she muttered aloud to herself.
Face down in the straw, the silver-haired sneak replied, "Well, I didn't think so until you said that."
Sakura nearly kicked herself. He had been awake the whole freaking time. "Jeez, Yakushi, you're an asshole."
"Let me correct myself, then," Kabuto grumbled, lifting himself up on one elbow and staring at her. Or what he could define as her, with his vision so blurred.
Unbeknownst to him, Sakura was staring into his unfocussed onyx eyes, compelled to listen for once... just in case he was going to repent his sins. "Yeah?"
"...I didn't think so, until you broke into Oto and got me and yourself arrested in the middle of the night."
Sakura pounded the bench with her fist. "I had my reasons for that."
Kabuto snorted at that, shaking his head slightly. "Yeah, let me guess... oh, you were looking for your precious Uchiha again? And then, once again, your problems become my f*cking problems."
He sounded more bitter than he had a right to be, but it went unnoticed by his audience. The mere fact that he had accurately guessed her 'reasons', silenced her momentarily. Then Sakura regained her composure. By shouting.
"How DARE YOU SUGGEST that this was MY FAULT, TRAITOR!?" the pinkette yelled, flying to her feet in a rage. "They saw YOU trying to defend me, and they thought I was... I was a..."
Her string of logic seem to break down at the inevitable word. They had thought she'd finally betrayed them to be with Sasuke. He watched her stare at the floor, her shortened, bubblegum-pink hair hiding her expression from him.
"Well, it's your own goddamn fault," he muttered.
Her head snapped up, lip trembling. She definitely wasn't used to being talked to like this. She opened her mouth, as if expecting a retort to come to her lips, but nothing happened. Because it really was.
After a few seconds of silence, Kabuto rolled over and tried to go back to sleep.
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Rule #9
Never forget Rule #9.
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After that, there was a guard outside their door, and they didn't talk any more. It was as if the words had all dried up. Sakura sat on the single bench, sleepless, picking apart a piece of straw restlessly. And as much as she hated to admit it, Yakushi was right.
Tsunade had ordered her not to go looking for Sasuke. A perfectly clear, straight down the line, damned ORDER from the Hokage. But she hadn't been able to let go. She had gone after him.
Oh, for chrissakes', why did she have to be so stupid!?
"Still thinking about it?" Kabuto remarked from the corner. The sardonic sneer had gone out of his tone.
"Thinking about what?" Sakura answered, too fast; she cursed herself for being so defensive. "The weather?"
Even through the gloom, she swore she saw him roll his eyes. "No. Sasuke-kun. Wherefore art thou, Romeo?"
A less exhausted, less used to Kabuto's crap Sakura would have kicked his ass, just for that. Instead, she tried to keep the shake out of her voice as she mumbled, "You know, that's probably one of the most misunderstood lines in history."
"Hm? How so?" his interest seemed to be piqued. Sakura shrugged.
"Well, wherefore means 'why'. She's not asking her lover where he's gone, she's demanding to know why he's being such an idiot. It's a simple misunderstanding, in the end, but..." she trailed off, like she didn't want to say it.
"But it's a misunderstanding that makes them both end up dead," Kabuto said flatly, and she nodded. Nail on the head with that one.
"Well..." he started to say, but then paused. As if he'd lost his words, like she had before. "Maybe that's what this is," he finished finally. "A misunderstanding."
"Of course it's a f*cking misunderstanding!" Sakura glowered, the spell broken all of a sudden. She was just as furious with him as ever. "Otherwise I wouldn't be here."
"Keep telling yourself that, honey," the guard from outside drawled, interrupting their conversation. Both of them froze at the sound of his voice, suddenly remembering that they were being listened to.
Yeah.
Kabuto stood up very quietly, his feet muffled by the thin, damp, poor-excuse-for-a-bed straw. Sakura watched him lean against the wall for support, and she mouthed a silent question to him. What the hell are you doing?
But, of course, he couldn't see it. The round, empty frames of his glasses rested against her wall, staring into space, but she felt no urge to get up and pick them up. They were useless now, after all.
The apparently-prematurely-balding idiot made it to her end of the room without planting his face on the dungeon floor -- no mean feat. He gripped the chain supporting her seat with one hand, leaning down to her level. Sakura stayed still as a statue as the traitor murmured in her ear, his breath tickling her neck and raising not-unpleasant goosebumps.
"Look, we have to get out of here."
The most loyal part of her rebelled at that thought. "That's a ridiculous idea," she hissed back, and she felt him flinch. Only slightly, but --
"Really? You think you'll just explain yourself and they'll let you go?" Kabuto muttered back, closing his painfully blurry eyes. His limited line of sight was making his head spin horribly.
It occurred to Sakura that that was what she had thought... right up until he'd said that. Not that she was letting on. "They'll believe me," she said stoutly, although her resolve was wavering.
And what about him? There wasn't much doubt about what would happen to him. In fact, it was a thought that had probably been at the forefront of Kabuto's mind for the last... however many hours. Sakura's hands curled into fists, reproaching herself for being so blind.
Yeah, her, the one with working eyes.
Of course they weren't going to let him live.
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Rule #10
When the opportunity arises, don't let it get away.
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"And if they don't believe you?" he whispered.
Are you prepared to die?
It occured to her that his skin was so close to hers, she could feel the warmth of his body. He had planted one hand, fingers curled in a loose fist, on the other side of her, locking her into the seat. Her head was almost pressed back against the wall, and her breath shortened.
But not from fear.
Would you die with me?
"Then I guess I'll have to show them," Sakura murmured. They were inches apart now, and for a moment, she forgot all about Sasuke Uchiha.
"Then I guess I have something I need to say before you go," he replied, voice husky in his throat, like he was trying to suffocate his own words. Before I die.
"Yeah?" she said, unconsciously giving him permission to continue. As if Kabuto needed it.
There was a perfectly reasonable sentence hanging back behind his teeth, but he couldn't bring himself to say it aloud. And after the briefest of hesitations, he closed the remaining space between them, kissing her softly on the mouth. Their lips touched, and finally, Sakura closed her eyes too.
And that seemed to say everything.
Suddenly, the cell door slammed open behind them, brighter light streaming into the room. The two broke apart as fast as possible, Sakura automatically standing up and pushing Kabuto aside.
The spiky-haired silhouette in the doorway just gaped at the two of them, for a moment emulating nothing, apart from pure, livid shock.
"Are you f*cking kidding me?" Kakashi demanded.