Disclaimer: I own nothing of Harry Potter, it all belongs to JK Rowling.

A/N: This story has abuse, slash, language, character death and, I am sure there are others that I fail to mention here.

Watching Me Burn

Chapter 1 -

Harry lay curled in a chair, tears streaming down his bruised face. He couldn't believe he would do that to him. He ignored the banging on the library door. He didn't want to see him. He didn't want to hear the apologies. He loved him so much that it hurt, he didn't know what to do at this point. He didn't want to stay, but he didn't want to leave either. The pounding stopped, but he still didn't move. The tears had been falling steadily for an hour now. He was angry at himself for letting this happen. He was angry at Draco for doing it. He was angry at fate for putting him in the situation he found himself in.

He should have known he couldn't do anything out in public without it getting back to his fiance. Even though he did nothing bad. It was suppose to be a wedding gift to his soon to be husband, but when Draco found out he was talking to another man, no matter that the man was straight and married with kids, he flipped. He literally dragged him back to the manor and hit him for the first time since they had been together. It wasn't just one hit though, Harry's whole face was bruised. His body felt like it had been through another round with Voldemort.

He looked up and saw Draco leaning on the now open doorway, staring at him as if he'd never seen him before. He turned his head, the tears falling faster now. He couldn't help the sounds that escaped his throat. He knew Draco was watching him closely, but he made no move to come closer. Harry stayed where he was, not looking at the person he loved more than the world. How could this happen? Draco said he would never hurt him. They stayed in the same positions for a few more minutes before Draco slowly walked forward and dropped to his knees in front of him. Harry just now noticed the tears running down his beautiful face, and his breath caught. It didn't matter what he did to him, Harry couldn't stand to see Draco cry, it broke him on more than one level.

It felt like he was burning inside. The pain mixed with the anger, covered with a love so deep it was as if their souls were connected. He knew he couldn't live without Draco. No, he could, he just didn't want to. Draco took his breath away at any given moment. He brought out more emotions in him then anything in his life ever had or could. The anger began to come to the for front of his mind but swept away as soon as Draco spoke.

"I'm so sorry baby. I didn't mean it, I was just so angry. I saw you talking and laughing with him and I thought... I thought you two were together. I'm so sorry." Draco kept his head bowed until he felt fingers lift his chin. When he looked into emerald eyes though, he wanted to flinch back. There was nothing there, no emotion, no life. Before he could speak again Harry's other hand came up and smacked him hard across his face. His head snapped to the side, but he made no move to retaliate or move for that matter. He deserved it, that and so much more. Harry stood and pushed him to the floor, he didn't even stop, just left the room.

Harry left the room without looking back. He went straight to their bedroom and called his trunk to him. He began packing everything of his that was in the room. He would not take anything Draco had given him. He didn't want it. Draco made it to the room as the last of his things landed in the trunk. He never acknowledged the blondes presence, just closed his trunk and shrunk it placing it in his pocket. He turned to walk out of the doorway when Draco's arm shot out to stop him from leaving.

"Please baby, don't leave me." Draco told him in a pleading voice. Harry looked at him and saw the angry red mark on his face. The guilt set in and he reached out to touch it. He stopped before he made contact and dropped his hand. He pushed Draco's arm gently to the side and walked pass him toward the stairs, Draco hot on his heels. He almost made it to the doors when he was grabbed and pushed into the wall. Draco pinned his body with his own, determination mixed with anger shown in his eyes.

"I can't let you leave Harry. Please don't try. I need you. I love you. I will not live without you." He said while leaning forward to kiss the dark haired man in front of him. He didn't expect the slap to his other cheek as a response though. He grabbed his wrist and pinned them together with one hand above his head. Harry struggled to get free, finally screaming when he found it futile. He pushed his body out to try to make the blonde move, cursing his size when he didn't budge.

"Let go of me! Leave me the fuck alone! I hate you! I fucking hate you Draco!" He started off screaming but finished in barely a whisper, tears once again streaming down his face. "God's, who could you? How could you Draco?" In response Draco gently began kissing his bruised face, sending his magic out to heal the cuts and swelling. Harry let out a loud wail in protest but Draco didn't stop. He made it to his lips and Harry began kissing back desperately. His body was in torment as were his emotions. Draco raised his body a bit and Harry quickly wrapped his legs around his waist. Draco made their clothes disappear, then did three quick spells to clean, stretch, and lube Harry's entrance. Harry screamed out when he entered him, it was to much. He bit, scratched and slapped any expanse of ivory skin in front of him. Draco never once hit him back, just continued to thrust deeper and kiss harder.

He grabbed Harry's leaking erection in between them and began stroking him in time with his thrust. Harry came with a horse shout and Draco joined him in ecstasy with another thrust, the inside of Harry's clenching walls being to much for him at the moment. He didn't pull out, just leaned against the crying man in front of him. "I promise Harry, it will never happen again." Harry knew he was lying, but he didn't care at the moment, he sounded so sure, so sincere about it that he wanted to believe him. He loved the way he lied, he made it sound so real. He loved everything about the blond. How could he not?

Draco gently pulled out of him and lifted him higher, he carried him up the stairs and into the large bathroom they shared. He gently set the smaller man on the side of the tub and set to filling it up and adding pain relieving and muscle relaxing potions to the hot water. When it was full Draco lifted Harry into his arms again and descended into the deep tub. He walked to the side and laid back against the side of the marble. He turned Harry so his back was laying against his chest, and wrapped his arms around the thin body. Pulling him close, as close and tight as he could without hurting his lover, he began to run his hands through the dark curls.

"Why? How could you Draco?" Harry asked in a voice barely above a whisper, but he knew the blonde heard him. Draco just squeezed him tighter, "I'm so sorry baby, it won't happen again. I was so angry that you were with him. The way he was flirting with you. The way you were smiling at him, it just... I just... I can't live without you Harry. And I won't let anyone take you away from me. I don't care who they are." He finished in an angry hiss. His grip had gotten tighter with every word.

"Your hurting me!" Harry gasped out and was immediately let go. Draco slowly washed them both then dried them and carried Harry to the bed. He laid him out then went to get a bruise salve. He slowly rubbed it into Harry's face and body where needed. They fell asleep wrapped around each other.

Harry sat in the library, it had been months since that fateful turning point in his and Draco's relationship. It was not the last time he was hit though, and every time he was, Draco did the same thing. He promised never to do it again, then he would make love to him, bath him and heal any marks or cuts he had on his body. The only thing he couldn't heal were the emotional scars his beatings left. Harry wasn't sure he could take much more of the abusive loving care his soon to be husband dealt him. He loved him, but he didn't know if he wanted to stick around to find out if it would kill him. Especially with the news he had gotten earlier today. His hand moved to his churning abdomen, were he rubbed soothing circles trying not to be sick. What would happen if Draco got angry about the news? Well, he knew he would, and knowing there was nothing he could do, he would take it out on Harry.

A hard glint entered his eyes and he stood up. He quickly packed his things, listening closely in case Draco came home anytime soon. As soon as he was done he shrunk the trunk and made his way to the fireplace in the study to floo out of there. His timing was perfect because not five minutes later Draco entered the study, anger evident on his pale face. He ran to their bedroom and flung the wardrobe open. All of Harry's clothes were gone. He dropped to his knees and screamed out in pain. His love was gone.

Harry had now been at Ron and Hermione's for a month, and his body was in agony, as was his heart. He missed Draco so much, but he didn't want to face him. How do you tell the one you love, that you are dying? Hermione had been extremely upset, she would break down at the slightest comments he made. She though, understood a lot more than her husband, who had to have everything explained to him. That had not been a fun not for him, he also had to explain everything that had happened between he and Draco.

To say his friends were upset was putting it mildly. The two of them had to hold Ron back from, 'Killing that snot nosed little bastard!', as he had so delicately put it. Harry had been in tears the rest of the night and most of that week. Hermione had been going back and forth to Harry's appointments with him. After about two weeks though, the Healers could do no more. The leukemia had spread to fast and his magic trying to heal his body was making it worse. He stopped going to his appointments.

"Hermione?" Harry asked tiredly from where he was laying on the couch, blankets piled over him. Hermione looked up from her book showing he had her full attention.

"I want to see Draco. I know I don't have much time left, and I know what he did was wrong, but I still love him, and I want to spend the little bit of time I have left with him."

Hermione closed her eyes and took in a shuddering breath. "Okay Harry, I'll fire call him to come over." Harry smiled at her weakly and she stood to go to the fireplace that was located in the next room.

Hermione was divided, she loved her friend and wanted him away from the violent blonde. But, she also knew how much Harry cared for the idiotic man, so she would do as he asked. Grabbing a handful of floo powder, she threw it into the flames calling "Malfoy Manor Study!". She looked from the flames out into the study, but Draco was no where around. An elf popped in and before it could ask she had already started speaking.

"I need you to please find Malfoy and tell him it is an emergency. Tell him it is Mrs. Weasley calling please." The elf bowed and popped away. Not two minutes later she heard hurried footsteps coming toward the room. She was taken aback by the blondes appearance, he looked like shit. His robes were wrinkled, his hair was stringy and in disarray from not being washed, and she just knew that if she could smell him, he would be covered in the stench of alcohol. The bloodshot eyes were enough of a giveaway.

"Gra- Weasley, what do want?" He asked not even hiding the discontent in his voice at seeing her.

"Harry wishes to see you Malfoy. I promised that I would call you over. He's... He's not well." Tears came to her eyes once again but she held them back. "He really needs you, wants you. But, I will not let you take him if you have any ideas of laying another hand on him. He can't take it, and I won't let the last of his ti-...I won't let you either. Now, go clean up and for God's sake take a sober up potion. Don't let him see you as you are right now. It would destroy him. When you are ready, come on over, I'll be there to greet you." Hermione finished quickly. Draco nodded stunned then quickly pulled it together and left the room.

Hermione waited for ten minutes before the flames turned green and Malfoy stepped out looking as pristine as ever. His eyes though held all the worry that his face never did. Hermione sighed and walked towards him throwing up a silencing charm.

"I'm letting you know now, he doesn't look good. To be perfectly honest, he looks awful, and no, I won't tell you why, that is for him to tell, which he will. Now please don't upset him, he already feels like he made the biggest mistake leaving you, don't make it worse. Just listen to him, and Draco, I'm...I'm here if you need anything or anyone." She choked out trying to control the tears that were threatening to fall. Draco gave her a few minutes to compose herself before she finally cleared her throat and told him to follow her.

When they walked into the living room Draco had to hold back a gasp. Harry looked so fragile, he didn't look like that less than two months ago when he had held him last. Harry was curled up on the sofa sleeping, so he quietly walked over and conjured a chair to sit in next to his head. He reached out and clasped a cold hand. His other went to the once full face of his lover to stroke the now sunken in cheek. Emerald eyes fluttered open and Draco gave him a timid smile. Harry slowly sat up, not once losing contact with the mercury gray eyes he loved so much.

"Draco, you came." Harry whispered giving him a small smile in return. Draco kissed his hand then leaned forward to press a kiss to his still soft lips. "Of course I did. I would do anything for you Harry." Harry leaned forward until most of his weight was rested on the blondes chest. "Take me home Draco, please. I just want to lay in bed with you again." Without a word Draco stood and swooped his fiance into his arms bridal style and walked from the room. Hermione gave him a nod which he returned, then they were gone in a flurry of green flames.

Harry lay in bed, propped up my pillows, he was so tired, but he had some explaining to do. Draco sat next to him waiting patiently. Harry took a deep breath and began.

"Do you remember how I would get just these little cuts off of pretty much anything, or I would bleed to heavy sometimes when I got really hurt?" Draco cringed, he knew he had caused most of those 'hurts'. " Or how I would bruise on just the simplest things? There were other things that had me worried, but, getting to the point, I went to see a Healer because I just plain didn't feel good and my magic was acting funny." Harry stopped for a moment a took a few deep breaths, he was feeling lightheaded again and the potions had kept his stomach upset since he had first started them.

"The Healer told me that I had, sorry have, a muggle disease called leukemia. Leukemia is like a cancer of the blood, well, there is more to it then that, it is just to hard to explain. In short, they have tried all the treatments they know of, muggle and magical. I've been on potions since I first went in. They make me sick to my stomach, but they also prolong my...Draco, I'm dying. They tried everything, but my magic is trying to fight the disease and in effect it was fighting the treatment they were giving me. It made it worse. They nor myself are sure how long I have left. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I just couldn't face you at the time." Harry had tapered off into a whisper.

Draco hadn't said a word or made a noise at all so Harry looked up at his face, which he wouldn't look at during his explanation. He saw anger, pain, hurt, regret, shock, and many other emotions he didn't even want to try and decipher at the moment, he was too tired. "No." Harry's head snapped back up at the almost silent proclamation. "No Harry, they have to be mistaken, you can't... you.. you can't leave me." He finished in a broken sob, tears began to stream down his face.

Harry gave him a small smile, "I'm sorry Drake, it's not like I have a choice. I've seen the best Healers around, even the top muggle Doctors. There is nothing to be done. My magic has pretty much guaranteed the destruction of my body. I wish it wasn't so, but it is. Please, don't let the last bit of time we have left go to waste arguing over this. I'm too tired right now, please just can we...can you just lay here with me?" Draco crawled towards him tears still flowing and pulled him to him, holding him close as he fell to sleep.

The next few weeks were hell on earth for Draco. Harry had gotten so weak, they both knew it wouldn't be long now. Draco had quit his job with the Ministry and strictly stayed home to help Harry. He was trying to get as much time with the love of his life as possible One day he had come back from a trip to a restaurant because Harry wanted Chinese food when an ideal popped in his head. He made a trip to the Ministry and then back to Gringotts.

When he had come through the floo back home, his guests were already there. He beckoned them to follow him then to wait out side of the room. When he walked in Harry was sitting up reading a book, which he put aside seeing the blonde. Then he caught the nervous expression. "Draco, what is it?" He asked in a soft worried voice. Draco strode toward him, all nervousness leaving his body. He sat on the edge of the bed and clasped Harry's hand in his own.

"Harry, will you marry me?" Harry's eyes popped but he pulled his hand away shaking his head, tears stinging his eyes. "I couldn't do that to you Draco." He answered quietly. Trying to fold in on himself but, Draco wouldn't let him. He snatched the hand back and set a determined look on his face. "Harry, I refuse to let you die without marrying me, and vice versa. I want to be your husband, even if it is just for a second, minute, days, weeks, months, years, I don't care about the time. I know you love me and want this and you know I love you and want this. Please?"

Harry held back his tears, and finally he nodded. Draco's response was a blinding smile, "Minister Kingsley, Hermione, Ron, you can come in now." They all came in with smiles on their faces and Harry laughed out loud at Draco's plan. "Oh Draco, I love you so much."

The ceremony was a quick one done right there in the bedroom, Harry being to weak to stand for long laid in bed the whole time. They exchanged the wedding bands Draco had gotten out of his vault, and the papers were signed. Dobby appeared with a three tier cake that had Harry in fits of laughter. After their guest left, Draco made love to his husband for what would be the last time.

Draco awoke the next morning with Harry wrapped in his arms. He tried to wake him, but it was no use, his husband had finally passed. Tears ran down his cheeks, but he had a small smile on his face. "Don't worry Love, I will be with you soon." He said as he placed a kiss on Harry's cold lips.

"Dobby!" He called out to the silent room. A 'pop' was heard when the little elf appeared, his eyes widened and filed with tears.

"Dobby, I know you feel the loss, but I have one last request for you, for Harry."

"Wha-what c-can D-Dobby bes d-doing for M-Master D-Draco?" Dobby asked trying to keep from wailing. Draco smiled at him lowly.

"Dobby in exactly two hours, I want you to go to Harry's friend Hermione and tell her what happened. I want you to tell her the funeral arrangements have already been made, and that all she has to do is call the Goblins, they will tell her everything else. Can you do that for me Dobby?" Draco asked quietly.

Dobby nodded then popped away.

Draco reached over to his side of the bed and pulled a vial from his nightstand. "I'm coming Harry, wait for me." he whispered. He downed the whole contents then laid down next to Harry pulling his body close.

"I love you." Were the final words out of Draco's lips before his heart stopped all together.

THE END