A/N: Okay, I've been planning this for a while now, I wanted to write something angsty about a breakup from the perspectives of both of the people involved. This is RokuNami, a pairing I have been wanting to write for a while but never had the chance. This is going to be a two-shot, the first from Roxas' perspective and the next from Naminé's. I hope you enjoy.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Kingdom Hearts.
I've just started writing so some constructive criticism would be lovely to help me improve. Also the cover image is by Kiome-Yasha.
Roxas trudged up the now vacant street, his boots making light noises on the hard ground. The street lights blaring down in front of him making his navigation easier. Feeling the harsh wind on his face he shrugged his jacket up to his mouth; hands never leaving his pockets. He let out a grunted sigh as he reached his destination. Walking up the path, he examined the scenery; flowers were just beginning to grow back on trees. That's when it had dawned on him just how long it had been since he had been there, the last time he had walked up this porch snow had only begun to melt and the trees were still bare and lifeless. He felt tears sting his eyes out of guilt. He was an awful person. His cobalt eyes dashed up to the window, the same window he threw rocks at to get her attention, the same window he tried to climb to get her to forgive him. He knew she would be in that room, he just hoped that she was alone. He prayed that he wasn't too late to prove his love; he needed to prove his love because he needed her. While running a hand threw his hair, he mentally scolded himself, he didn't have any right to hope she hadn't moved on, you left her remember?Even though he knew this, he still wanted to act selfish; he wanted her to be just his, his girl forever. During his mental debate he hadn't even realized he was right in front of her door. He contemplated leaving, feeling terrified but his conscience told him to stick it out at knock on the door. Letting out a big huff he raised a trembling hand and knocked on the door.
As soon as his fingers came back to his side, the petrified feeling came back and he started feeling queasy. However the worst feeling was the guilt, he felt it swimming around inside him about to burst out. He felt worthless and like everything was his fault. He couldn't believe he had screwed up so bad. He could practically feel his shoulder angel and devil arguing. He sharply turned his head when he heard the soft pitter patter of feet scuttling across the hall. His breath stilled in his throat as he anticipated the opening of the door. He knew she was home alone; her parents were always out at this time. He doesn't know why he came back here again, he doesn't deserve her forgiveness but somehow he needs it, he needs to feel her in his arms again. He felt like time was going in slow motion when the rusty doorknob began to turn signalling the opening of the door. His mind suddenly went blank and he didn't know what he was going to say to her. His eyes closed momentarily out of fear when he heard the door creak open. They shot open quickly when he heard her gasp in surprise.
He tried to think of words to say, anything at all. But his mind was blank all he could think of was the guilt and how awful he is. He looked at her for the first time, really looked at her. She truly was beautiful. Her blonde hair looked stood out in the darkness and looked luminous; she wore a simple white dress that went to just above her knee. Oh boy had he seen that dress before. Simple things trigger memories in his head, the guilt then charging full force threw his body, it was enough to make his head hurt.
"Roxas, why are you here?" Her usually soft voice was hard, cold, unforgiving. He felt himself flinch at the harshness of her voice. He started mumbling a bunch of incoherent words that made no sense. He looked up at her hoping that her icy expression would stop being so icy and that it would calm him down like it used to. No such luck, her cold glare never left his face, her eyes never leaving his. He felt as if he may puke if he didn't say something fast.
"I'm sorry Nami" Were the only words that came out of his mouth, in his head he had some big, blown out speech and she would cry out of happiness and forgive him. His fantasy was exceedingly far from reality. He berated himself for not giving her a proper apology; he wished he had enough courage to say more to her, he wished he wasn't such a coward. If possible Naminé's expression somehow grew darker, her lips twitching into a snarl. She let out a bitter laugh; he had to suppress a gasp at hearing this he never thought Naminé could make a sound so, evil and vicious.
"You're sorry? Come on Roxas don't make me laugh, how many times do you have to leave and break my heart and come running back here? I'm sick of it! I'm sick and tired of you leaving me just to come back again and restart the cycle, I'm sick of you running away because you're scared! And most of all I'm sick of how terrified I get when you come back here because I know I'll forgive you." Her voice became softer as she finished what she was saying. Roxas felt out of breath, he knew everything she said was true; he did run because he felt scared, he did always come back just to leave again. Even though he knew it was an awful thing to think of at that moment, his hope rose just a little at hearing her say she always forgives him. But it all came crashing down again when she spoke in a raspy way, trying to catch her breath from all the screaming. "But not this time Roxas, I've been hurt to many times by you and I'm not risking it again, I can't. You've blown it for the last time."
He struggled to find the words to say, he couldn't think, he could only feel. He could feel the hurt behind her eyes, he could feel the guilt come back, the heartache, the fear but he couldn't feel the hope anymore, it had disintegrated into nothing. "Nami, please let me come in and explain everything to you, please?" He saw the confused expression on her face, as if debating whether to invite him in or push him down some stairs, eventually he saw her slowly nod her head, allowing him to come inside. He slowly let out a breath he hadn't realised he was holding and sat down on one of the brown leather sofa in the sitting area, he examined the room nothing had changed at all. The wallpaper had red roses scattered all over, there was the marble fireplace in the centre of the room by the wall and the floor was still white and stone. Roxas looked at Naminé as she waited for him to speak; he was captivated by her beauty in the light of the fire. She truly glowed.
"Don't call me that," She snapped at him as she sat down, he tried to think of what she was talking about until it hit him, she didn't want him to call her Nami. He looked down at the ground as he tried to keep his breathing steady, he felt his heart breaking at the revelation; Roxas had called her Nami ever since they were eight years old. He slowly looked up at her as she let out a slow breath, her voice back to the voice he knew. "Please don't call me that" She whispered so softly it was hard to hear her.
Roxas started chewing his bottom lip as he tried to figure out what to say to her. "Nami-Naminé," He quickly corrected himself when he saw the way her eyes narrowed when he called her by her childhood nickname. "I came here to ask you to take me back, I know it's selfish to ask this of you but please forgive me? You were right before Naminé, I do run because I'm scared and I always come back but the reason I always come back is because I love you and I love you so much that it hurts and that scares me, so I run away. I've made so many mistakes in this relationship and I hate myself for it, I feel like the guilt is eating me alive sometimes," He struggled to find the words as water filled his gaze, he chewed on his lip a little harder and dug his fingers into the leather of the couch, trying to keep the tears at bay. "I know I have little chance of you taking me back but I needed to try because I need you Nami." Roxas didn't care if she didn't want him to call her that, he was going to anyway. "If you take me back Nami, I swear I will never leave you again, I won't hurt you anymore, I won't let myself hurt you."
Roxas watched intently at Naminé's expression as she ran a hand over her face and took slow breaths. She turned her head to look at him, her expression still icy and cold, however it had somewhat melted. "Roxas…I still love you, I think a part of me will always, always love you. I mean you were my first love and that will always mean something to me and it hurts like hell to say this but I can't take you back," He felt his face crumple up as the tears started streaming down his face, Naminé seemed unfazed by this as she carried on speaking. "Even though it hurts, it would pain me even more to take you back." Roxas' eyes snapped open when she took his hand in hers, her expression watery. He wanted to take his hand back, feeling like he had been burned. The contact made it hurt so much more but at the same time he needed to feel her touch for the last time. "If we were together again, all I would be able to think about was how much I was hurting when you left, I would constantly be wary of you in case you left me again, I wouldn't let myself be attached to you."
Roxas didn't want to hide the tears anymore, he sobbed quietly as she held his hand. He felt like his insides were going to fall out, he felt useless. All the stories of heartache and broken hearts were true; he had never felt this low before in his life. In a soft shaky voice he spoke "Can I please hold you? For the last time," He looked up at her as she nodded softly, tears swiftly racing down her face.
He pulled her into his embrace and softly started rocking back and forth, her tears soaking his shirt, he tried to keep his sobs at bay and truly appreciate holding her for the last time.
A/N: Thank you for reading! I will be working on the part from Naminé's perspective soon. I'm sorry if the ending seemed rushed. Hopefully I will fix that on the second part.
Reviews, favorites and follows are all appreciated, I hope you enjoyed it.