Because there aren't enough cat stories.
Assassin's Creed belongs to Ubisoft.
When Malik had gone out shopping that morning, he hadn't expected to return and discover his Bureau occupied. But there he was, huddled in the corner of the garden, shoulders hunched and an air of tension surrounding him.
The Dai could not see what he was doing, but the angry thoughts that always surfaced in his presence offered plenty of crude, mean explanations. He shrugged and went back to his desk, setting his new inks and parchments down. Whatever that novice was doing was of little concern. The sooner he left, the better.
Just as Malik was about to sit back in his chair, there was a loud, shrieking sound from the garden that did not sound human. Malik stumbled and nearly tripped over his chair in surprise. What the hell was that?
His hand was already on his throwing knives as he rushed back around his desk and to the entrance to the garden, prepared for a fight. "What the hell was that?" he snapped furiously.
He had gotten onto his knees, crouched over something and muttering to himself. He spun sharply at Malik's words, and the Dai hesitated the slightest at the slightly panicked expression on his normally-stoic features.
"Malik!" he stammered, golden eyes uncharacteristically wide. "Y-you're…" There was a high-pitched squeak from the corner, and the Dai was forgotten and he turned back sharply, balancing his weight with one hand and using his other to…do something. Malik couldn't tell from here.
"Altaïr," Malik ground out, "What the HELL are you doing?"
His response was an ear-piercing screech. Altaïr flinched at the sound like he'd been smacked on the face. "Shh!" he hissed urgently. "Shh, it's okay, it'll be fine, it's fine it's… oh, shit…"
Malik's curiosity was eating him alive, so he walked over and peered over the novice's shoulder, confused as to what the hell was making this arrogant, stoic bastard Assassin seem so unnerved.
He froze.
There was a skinny grey cat laying on a wad of blankets, feline face scrunched up in pain. A slimy wad of fur lay near her head—Malik recognized it was a new-born kitten. And it appeared this random stray was about to push out another one.
Altaïr could've almost been called a nervous wreck. "Wh-what do I do?" he cried. "I don't know what I'm doing!"
Malik winced as the cat cried out again, obviously in pain. "Oh, for Allah's sake! Get out of my way, Novice!" He then physically pushed Altaïr aside and took his place, kneeling next to the cat and reaching out to stroke her round belly. "Go fill a bowl with water," he ordered. "And bring it here with some cloths! And be fast!"
Altaïr was more than happy for once to follow orders.
(o)
The cat purred happily as she licked her three kittens, tired and relieved to finally be through labor and begin the grueling process of raising her little offspring.
Malik leaned heavily against the wall next to her, wiping his bloody hand off on the front of his bloody robes. The third kitten had been breech, but the cat had pulled through alright. All four felines would be fine.
The Dai rested his head against the stone, exhausted by the ordeal. He hadn't woken up today expecting to help a cat give birth! But as he watched the helpless kittens suckle their mother, he couldn't help but melt a little inside. The sight would warm even Altaïr's cold heart.
Speaking of which.
The stupid Novice was crouched on the other side of the mother cat, gently urging her to take a break from grooming to drink some water. She obliged, but only for a moment before returning to her kittens.
Malik swallowed dryly, then asked the burning question of the day. "Altaïr, how the hell did a pregnant cat get into the Bureau?"
Altaïr was unresponsive for a moment, focused on the mother cat, before sitting back, rubbing his temples with his hand. "I found her," he said quietly. "In the alley. She—she was going into labor, I could just tell… I brought her here so nobody would get in her way…"
His face was hidden by his hood, but Malik could have sworn he saw a blush of embarrassment on the Assassin's tanned cheeks. The thought of this class-A asshole rescuing a pregnant mother cat and giving her a place to have her kittens was almost too much to bear.
Malik started to laugh. And once it started, he could not stop. Before long, he was doubled over, clutching his stomach and positively cracking up.
Altaïr shot him a very indignant look. "What the hell is your deal?" he demanded hotly.
The Dai shook his head in amusement, finding some self-control. "You," he snorted. "A Novice like you helping an innocent creature! I never thought it possible for you to have such human emotions."
The Assassin's eyes flinched, but otherwise he gave no indication of how badly the biting remark stung.
Malik wiped his eyes with his sleeve, calming down. "So, Novice."
"What?"
"What are you going to name your new pet kittens?"
A short to unblock a mental block.
I imagine Altaïr would be total, secret sucker for soft fuzzy things. Like Malik! *shot*
So yeah.
With love,
the Moose.