I don't own them. They belong to Showtime

Second Chances

Six Years Ago

Carmen sat in the church, still in shock over the event that didn't happen. She looked down at the letter that Alice had handed to her more than an hour ago. She hadn't been able to open it yet, even though it would explain why she was feeling this way. Taking another calming breath, she opened the letter and began to read.

Dear Carmen,

Although it is nowhere near enough, I want to say I'm sorry, first and foremost. I love you more than anything and I realized that you deserve so much better than me. I should have realized this before today, before you had to stand in front of your family and our friends and tell them the wedding was off. And again I am sorry.

I saw my father today, just hours before I was supposed to be standing at the end of the aisle waiting for you. I caught him with another woman, a woman I know is not his wife. I realized then that I'm not sure if I can stay in a monogamous relationship without the risk of hurting my partner, hurting you. You deserve happiness and loyalty. And I want to be that person for you, but that can't happen until I get help. I've got problems that stem much farther than my issues with relationships, some of which you know.

I know I am in no position to ask anything of you, but I need a favor. Don't wait for me. I can't have you put your life on hold while I get my shit together. If I have blown any future I might have had with you, then that is my problem.

I wish you all the happiness in the world, even if it isn't with me. I hope I pull it together before it's too late. Until we meet again.

Forever yours,
Shane

The tears Carmen had tried to hold couldn't be contained by the end of the letter. She silently cursed Shane's father for putting doubts in her head. She was angry but on some level she understood what Shane was trying to do. She had only hoped that if this did come up they could have talked about it, instead of Shane trying to save Carmen the pain by leaving. That almost hurt more than if Shane would have said it to her face. The fact that Shane was going to get help, for her, brought a small smile to Carmen's face. It was then that she came to a decision. She would wait. She would still date of course, but when it came to the point for commitment, she would have to leave. The women would know this of course. She wasn't one to lead someone on. But her heart would always belong to Shane.

Present day

Carmen walked down the streets of New York City, thinking about a letter she had received almost six years to the day. About a week after the almost wedding, she had moved out of West Hollywood, out of California all together. If Shane really wanted to change, she didn't want to be around as a distraction.

She had saved enough money to rent an apartment large enough to serve as her studio as well. Now she was a successful DJ, with invitations to spin at celebrity parties and be the producer for some of the top performers in the industry.

She still thought of Shane, and hoped one day in the near future she would try to contact her, even if it was just to tell her about her life. Carmen ad kept in touch with most of the girls from their little group, but no one would mention Shane. She didn't know if it was because Shane told them not to or they thought it would be too painful for her. What they didn't understand was that not hearing about Shane was starting to worry her a little. As far as Carmen knew, Shane could have died. She was startled out of the depressing though by the ringing of her cell phone. Looking at the caller id, she smiled before answering.

"You cow," Carmen exclaimed through her phone. "How could you not tell me you were going to be in New York last weekend, Alice?"

"I didn't think it would have mattered," Alice said from the other line. "You were in Miami for something or another."

"I would have changed my plans, Al. I haven't seen you in forever."

"Tell you what, when you get nominated for the Grammy you can invite me as your date," Alice said as though it solved everything.

All Carmen could do at first was laugh. "I have to get the job first, Alice," she finally replied.

"Carmen they would be insane if they didn't hire you. You are like the hottest thing in music right now."

"Coming from the woman who didn't even tell one of her best friends they would be in the same city when said woman was filming a stint on the Today Show to help promote her radio show that just became nationally syndicated?"

"Hey Carmen! Guess who was in New York last weekend filming a stint on the Today Show to help promote her radio show that just became nationally syndicated?" Alice asked.

"Smart ass," Carmen smirked.

"At least I told you," Alice replied. "Anyway, the reason I called was because I had a suggestion."

"For what?" Carmen questioned.

"You said you wanted to have your hair done before your appointment," Alice replied. "While I was at the studio, I had the most amazing hair dresser. When I asked her where she worked, she said it was a place called Shay's. I am totally recommending you. And because I am such a totally cool friend, I have already booked your appointment for six o'clock tonight. This place is hot and you wouldn't have gotten in otherwise."

Carmen looked at her watch and realized it was already five-thirty. "What's the address?" she sighed. She stepped up to the curb and raised her arm to hail a cab.

Alice rattled off the address just as Carmen got into her cab, who then gave it to the driver. "I have to go," Alice suddenly said. "I'm meeting the girls at the Planet tonight. Have fun and trust me when I say you'll enjoy it."

Carmen wanted to ask about Shane, but before she got the chance she was greeted with the sound of a dial tone. She watched as the cab pulled up to a very stylish building. The sign design looked as though various colorful pieces of ripped paper had been placed together to spell it out. She stepped into the main lobby and noticed the music playing was one of her originals. She smiled and wondered if she would get a discount if she told them who she was.

She silently laughed off the idea and approached the receptionist. "Hi," Carmen smiled. "I'm Carmen de la Pica Morales and I have a six o'clock appointment."

She watched as the woman checked her book. Taking a peek, she noticed that the only entry on the six o'clock line that didn't have a real name said "celeb." As she didn't see her name anywhere, Carmen assumed that was supposed to be her. She would definitely have to call Alice later about this.

The receptionist turned her back to Carmen and yelled towards the back. "Boss, your six o'clock is here."

Carmen watched in stunned silence as a very familiar person walked up to the desk, head down looking through what looked like a record book, call out in a very familiar voice. "Sheila, how many times do I have to tell you not to call from one of the store to the other? I installed the radios for a reason." Shane through the book on the desk and finally looked up at her client. Her look of shock mirrored Carmen's from a moment before. "Carmen!" she exclaimed in surprise.

"Shane," Carmen almost whispered as a small smile began to form.

Shelia looked back and forth between the two of them. "This day just got a whole lot more interesting," she thought to herself.