A/N I do not own NCIS or any of the characters. This is my take on how we can finally get a Marty Deeks back story and address his childhood some of us have hoped to see. hope you enjoy love reviews!

Deeks, M

It's been six months. Exactly 24 weeks. 168 days. Deeks laid in bed wide awake. He started thinking back to that night.

24 weeks ago...

The four agents and two analysts sat in the bar. Deeks and Kensi's bar had become a staple hangout for the team, especially after difficult cases. One much like tonight.

"I'll never get past parents endangering their kids." Kensi shook her head in disbelief. Several cases as of late had involved a child at some point. It never got easier.

"You alright man?" Sam placed his hand on Deeks shoulder.

"Huh," Deeks who had been abnormally quiet, looked up from his thoughts. "Oh, ya I'm good. Just another case right?"

But it hadn't been just another case. A high ranking Naval commander's son had shown signs of abuse during a recent visit with his father. Commander Alex Harding had let his wife maintain custody after their divorce 3 years ago. His ex wife quickly remarried and moved the boy to Los Angeles from Washington DC. The boy was now nearing 10 years old. ALex JR, known as AJ begged his father to take him back to DC on their last visit. Commander Harding, unfortunately could not grant his son that wish, as he was to be deployed on a six month mission. He assured his son he would do his best to bring him home after he returned. He noticed several small bruises that seemed to be healing and didn't think twice, attributing it to boys being boys. Two days later, the night before Commander Harding was to depart, he received a call from his frantic ex wife, Emily, that AJ has fallen and sustained a radial fracture of his Humerus as well as a dislocated shoulder. AJ needed surgery and Alex was excused from his mission to attend to his son.

Hetty was still MIA. Admiral Killbride accompanied Commander Harding to LA by request from Secnav. Even though this was seemingly a custody case, Emily evaded to the fact that she had downloaded security files from Alex's work laptop to use as leverage should a custody case ever arise. Those statements, turned an average custody battle into a case of National Security. The files contained data that foreign intelligence would pay highly to obtain. Add that to the fact that Emily's new husband, Mathew Armstrong, had been suspected to be an extremist willing to go to great lengths to keep Alex out of their lives. He had several past DUIs that was somehow swept under the rug, it was assumed he had higher and deeper connections than you're average alcoholic.

Alex had suspected things weren't always roses on the home front with Emily, AJ and Mathew. Emily has called Alex several times with just silence on the other end. When he'd call back or ask her about it later, she would laugh it off to dialing his number out of old habits. Emily often had healing wounds as well, blaming gardening, or being clumsy. Alex had a duty to his country, so he let sleeping dogs lie, until that call about AJ.

When Alex threatened to take AJ, Emily pulled out a thumb drive with the secretly stashed intelligence. Alex's hands were tied, or so he thought. His first call was to AJ Chadwiggen. The man was partially behind the reason Alex was so adamant to call his own son AJ. The senior AJ had been Alex's grandfather's best friend. Alex was very close to his grandfather and when he died, AJ guided a young Alex into the Navy, following in his grandfather's footsteps. Chadwiggen quickly alerted SecNav, who assigned Killbride to reach out to the only team capable of handling such a delicate situation. That and the fact the occurrences where in their own back yard, made it all the more acceptable.

When Deeks saw the injury the boy sustained, his eyes turned deep blue. A deep blue, not filled with love, but filled with anger and pain. His face turned a shade of pale none of the team members had never seen before, including Kensi. She immediately knew his thoughts were turning back to that of his father. A story she knew bits and pieces of. A story he could never bring himself to fully disclose. Yes she knew he had shot his father at age 11. He shot him with a gun Ray provided. He shot him to protect his mother, more so than himself. His protective nature grew stronger from that day, but secrets so dark were buried along with truths.

Deeks immediately felt the urge to protect young AJ. The boy was skittish when Deeks and Kensi first introduced themselves. Interviewing a child was never easy, but Deeks was the only one who could relate and that made him the perfect bonding tool. The boy's hair lay shaggy as the Detectives. His eyes blue as the ocean. Deeks saw himself in this young boy. They bonded immediately over surfing and the fact that Kensi was super pretty, to quote a 10 year old boy. Young AJ frankly informed Deeks that surfing on the east coast waves were drastically different than the West coast.

"Hey buddy, can you tell me about your dad?" Deeks asked.

"He's amazing. I want to live with him, but he is protecting people and me." His eyes looked down with sadness. "You protect people too?"

"We do," Deeks smiled nodding to Kensi.

The boy gave a small grin. "Do you have a son too?"

"No," Deeks said softly.

Kensi saw the sadness in his eyes. "If we do one day, we hope he's as sweet as you," Kensi put her hand on Deeks' and smiled at the boy.

The boy grinned back ear to ear.

"Can you tell me about your step dad?" Deeks queried.

The boy looked nervously at Kensi. She took to his body language. "I'm gonna go see if I can find us some green jello, it's Deeks favorite," she whispered to Alex.

"Mine too!" He exclaimed.

"Ok, buddy. Do you like your step dad?"

"He's ok, I guess." The boy got quiet again.

"That's good."

"He smells sometimes."

"Oh yeah. What happens when he smells."

The boy's eyes filled with tears. Deeks knee the look. He knew the pain and the deepnsecrets that were hard to discuss, especially with a practice stranger.

"Can I tell you a secret between us," Deeks said watching the boy fidget.

AJ nodded.

"My dad smelled too, and when he did he would find me and be very mean to me. I had to learn it was the smell that made him do it and not anything I did at all." It took all Deeks had to spit the word from his mouth. He knew he needed to help the young version of himself fight the demons he would hold as well.

When Mathew arrived at the hospital with Emily, fear immediately overtook the boy's eyes. Deeks was all too familiar with such look. He knew the child was being abused and the injuries were most definitely not accidental.

"Step away from my son!" Mathew yelled blowing the scent of alcohol into the room.

Deeks felt his stomach turn. The scent that drove him to sneak out his window and wander shoeless around the neighborhood until wee hours of the morning. The scent that sent him walking miles to the beach to find solace. The scent that finally forced him to pull a gun and shoot John Gordon Brandel.

Emily coward behind yelling. "I did not give you permission to speak to my son."

"No, but I did," Alex retorted, knowing he had the strongest NCIS team behind him to counter any acts that would threaten National Security. "And let me assure you, if you caused harm to my son, jail time will be the last of your worries."

At this point, Callen and Sam has found and secured the thumb drive and Mathew was arrested shortly after entering the hospital and receiving the news from the senior members of NCiS. Alex took an approved leave of absence to finalize his custody win and settle his son back in DC. Emily immediately lost custody and was facing charges of her own for stealing the security information.

Deeks promised to visit DC and check out the East Coast waves. "Bring AJ to LA whenever you can. If he ever needs to talk," Deeks paused speaking to Commander Harding, "help him through it."

"You've helped my son more than you can imagine. The Admirals and SecNav were definitely right about you and you're team. You do great things. I'll be in touch, that's a promise." He shook the shaggy haired Detectives hand. "And if you ever decide to become a full fledged agent, you have my recommendations!"

Deeks forced a small smile while remembering the details of the end of the case that day while sitting next to Kensi across from Callen and Sam.

"At least it had a happy ending," Callen surmised. "We saved another kid from a dangerous Step father and saved the leak of some highly important intel."

"It just sucks little AJ had to suffer in the process," Deeks stated. "Demons he will not forget easily, but at least it ended before he had to make it end."

"He'll be ok, you'll see," Sam reassured the Detective. "You were. You are!"

"Oh so you're saying I'm good, Sam Hannah is telling me I'm a good detective and I'd make a good agent in his own way," Deeks humored.

"Don't push it, Shaggy." Sam shot him a large grin agreeing that Deeks was indeed a part of the team he was happy to have.

Kensi immediately realized her fiancé was hurting more than he was letting on. His humor was often a way of deflecting. This case had flooded the gates with memories so deeply buried beneath the rubble. Kensi quickly eyed Callen for assistance.

"So this has been fun, but you're all invading my house and it's waaay past my bedtime."

"You don't sleep, G"

"That's not true."

"Okay, Let me rephrase that, you sleep less then 2 hours a night, that's not a bedtime, that's naptime."

"Well then I guess it's way past my naptime."

"You're hopeless," Sam rolled his eyes finishing his beer.

Deeks started cleaning the empty bottles the team had left.

"I got it man, you and Kens go home," Callen assured him. "It's been a long day, I'll take care of cleaning the bar."

Deeks eyes expressed a wave of gratitude. "I'm not about to look that gift horse in the mouth. Let's get out of her, Kensalina, before he changes his mind," Deeks smirked.

The couple headed home. The ride was quiet until Kensi broke the silence.

"Wanna talk?"

"Not really."

"You know I'm here if you do," she took his hand in hers and squeezed gently. "I recall you telling me once that it helped when you talked about whatever was bothering you."

"Yes And You responded with, funny it doesn't help when you're bothering me," he smiled sweetly.

"Yes, but I'm being serious," she winked.

"No talking tonight Kens."

Kensi nodded and kept a tight hold on her fiancés' hand.

They walked in the house hand and hand. As soon as they closed the door behind them, Deeks grabbed Kensi close. He kissed her as if his life depended on it. The passion ignited both of them. They slowly undressed each other replacing the stressful day with a night filled with pure love and emotion. Kensi didn't speak other than to whisper small I love you's between kisses. She let Deeks use her as an emotional outlet, not that she minded. He had done the same for her many nights. Tonight he needed her. Body, soul and mind, he needed to feel the love she had for him and remind himself that all that mattered was Kensi Blye thought he was a good man, scars, bruises, and all the demons, she saw the man he was. For that, she was always his sunshine through the darkness.

He was tender and loving with her, Letting the emotional wave ride between them. He didn't want the night to end. She could feel his tension slowly begin to lift. She continued to kiss him while he made love to her until wee hours of the morning. Thankfully SecNAv has demanded the team take the next two days off to recoup from the stress the case put on them each in different ways.

Kensi pushed to no avail attempting to get Deeks to open up more about his past. The two days flew by and work consumed them once again.

Deeks' mind was racing as he tossed and turned 24 weeks later. Finally, deciding sleep was not going to grace him tonight, he gently kissed his wife's cheek trying not to wake her and headed downstairs. He went to the kitchen which was basically bare. The snacks ravished through, groceries had been on the list for this mornings activities as it was Saturday. He opened the fridge and grabbed a beer. He cracked it open and took a swig. The taste and smell made him nauseous. He'd never had a problem kicking a few back. It was a staple of the team after many cases. Tonight something was different. Tonight the smell and taste was not relaxing, but painful. He walked into the living room and turned on the tv. Mostly infomercials at that time of night, early morning. He was proud of his accomplishments, there was no doubt about that. He knew the team as he faced made him the person he was today, but what ifvthe demons overtook him one day. What if he couldn't control his alcohol intake one day. Would he turn into him? Deeks never shared part of his drive to open the bar was so that he could recognize when one of his patrons had overdone it. He had strict rules about cutting off people at their edge or giving them a place to solace instead of going home and using their family as punching bags or outlets for their own pain. Mama Deeks made the perfect manager as she as well could spot signs. A sign was hung at the entrance of the bar, "All Welcome for as long as You Need. Keys will be taken from anyone served more than 3 drinks and returned upon breathalyzer." Being an LAPD detective, owning a bar, definitely had its perks.

As he sat on the couch, he looked at the small frame sitting on the coffee table. He picked it up and traced his fingers over it. Small tears formed in his eyes.

17 weeks ago...

"Kens, come on baby. We were supposed to be at the office 30 minutes ago!"

"Just go, I think your food truck tacos were bad." She said hovering the toilet.

"You shouldn't have gotten up in the middle of the night and stole my leftovers again."

"Just tell the guys I'll get there when I can. Can you bring me an Alkaseltzer before you leave." She said vomiting again.

"Baby, I'll just wait for you. I'm sorry you're not feeling well." He said bringing her request and pulling her hair back.

"I'm never eating your tacos again."

He smirked knowing she would definitely eat his tacos again.

When she started feeling a little better she climbed into bed. "Can I take the day off?"

Deeks looked stunned. The tacos must have done her in because Kensi Deeks never misses a day of work. "You know what, right now it's just a paperwork day, I'll take care of it. If we get a case I'll call you."

"Thanks babe," she curled into a ball and attempted to go back to sleep.

Deeks shot the boys a text and headed to work.

"Thank you for making your appearance Shaggy," Sam teased.

"If my wife would stop sneaking down to the kitchen and eating my leftovers in the middle of the night, she may not be sick."

"I hate to break it to you, but you're married now. What's yours is hers and what's hers is hers." Sam smiled even bigger.

"Don't I know it. Except when it comes to paperwork apparently, then what's hers becomes mine."

"Hence, why I'm still a lone wolf," Callen interjected.

"Is it that, G or that your love interests include a rouge CIA agent and a falsely imprisonments Russian beauty?"

Then men laughed and bantered finishing up their weekly reports.

Deeks picked up dinner and headed home. Being the thoughtful husband he was, he decided soup was just what the doctor ordered for his love. He walked in expecting to see Kensi on the couch watching Titanic or Love Actually. To his surprise, she wasn't downstairs at all.

"Baby, I brought soup he called." When he didn't get a response, he headed upstairs. Kensi was sitting on the bed just staring down.

"Baby? What's wrong. Are you still feeling sick?"

She shook her head No.

"Baby? You're freaking me out."

She still didn't respond keeping her head down.

Deeks walked over and sat on the bed. "Kens, what's up?"

She looked up at him with her big brown eyes as wide as they could be. She handed him the object she was staring down at.

His blue eyes widened matching hers. "Really? Is this for real?"

Kensi nodded yes, still not speaking.

"Oh my God! Kensi he grabbed his as tight as he could grasping the test with the words pregnant appearing across it. "Are you good? Are you ok with this? Are you happy baby?" As happy as he was, he wasn't sure she was ready. He knew the exact night it happened. The night they saved little AJ from an abusive step father.

"Are you happy?" She whispered.

"I couldn't be happier. But are you?"

Tears of happiness began flowing from her eyes. "I am! I wasn't sure I was ready until I saw the words. Instantly I was in love. But I'm scared."

He knew those words were had for her to say. Kensi Blye now Kensi Deeks was never scared of much. And if she was, be damned if she admitted it. Their thing was a perfect example. Now a baby, another thing to be scared of since they both had unconventional upbringings, but together they could conquer anything.

"Well, field work is off the table. I'm gonna need a partner, I don't think I can survive third wheel status between Sam and Callen's bromance again."

She chuckled a bit. "I'm sure Nell would be happy to take some field time, I cannot be confined to OPS with Eric, but I'm sure I'll be able to find plenty if opened reports to consume me until I find a safer opportunity within NCIS."

"Sounds like you have a plan. And you can steal my leftovers anytime," he whispered to her belly and planted a kiss on her.

Now, he sat on his couch scared to death. His mind went to many dark places as the birth of his child neared. Demons he thought were buried beneath humor and found trust and love, were wedging theirselves higher and higher. Consuming his dreams and thoughts for days and nights.

Kensi woke to the empty bed. Her belly becoming more and more swollen as the weeks progressed. She pulled herself out of bed and placed her hands on her growing child. "Let's see what's keeping Daddy up tonight."

He heard her coming down the stairs. "I'm sorry if I woke you," he said feeling her eyes study him.

"Deeks, you can't keep this up. Our son needs his daddy. And if your not fully awake, you won't be help to anyone on the team."

"I know," he sighed. "My mind keeps racing. I don't know why."

"Wanna talk?"

"Baby, I wish I could. I don't know how. Or even where to start. The demons they just keep coming."

She placed her hand on his leg, "If you can't talk about it with me, I understand, but maybe it's time to call Nate."

"There's so many people out there with bigger problems baby, I don't want to bother him over things from my past."

"That's what he's there for. Plus he's our friend. If you won't do it for you or me, do it for him." She took her husbands hand that had been tracing the picture of the ultrasound, framed in blue letters pronouncing "it's a boy!", and placed it on her belly. The baby seemingly knowing his daddy needed a bit of encouragement kicked.

Deeks eyes lit up, "first thing in the morning, I'll call Nate."