Disclaimer: I hold no ownership over any piece of the Naruto franchise nor do I profit from my lovely plots.

Warning: Slash (which shouldn't be a warning but meh). Language. Adult themes. Rating will increase. AU.

Pairings: SasuNaru (main). Others...

WEARING A SKIRT IS LIKE…

One: Becoming A Lady

Naruto glanced away from his magazine to stare at his twin. "What do you want?"

Ino smiled sweetly as she sat at the edge of her brother's bed. "How would you like to do me a favor?"

"Depends… what do you want and what am I getting out of?" Making a deal with Ino was like making a deal with the devil and Naruto knew that he would have to tread lightly. Very lightly or else he'd end up with the short end of the stick.

"Just hear me out before you say no." Ino moved closer and took a deep breath as she pulled forth her best reserved puppy dog face. "I need you to go to school for me but it's only for a week and you don't start school until a whole two weeks after I do so it really wouldn't take up much of your time and I never really ask you for anything and I really, really, want to go to Miami with Sakura-"

Naruto held up his hand and Ino paused mid ramble. "Give me a second to think about it." He watched her squirm for a minute or two before he felt satisfied enough to say, "No." Why the hell would he choose to go to school when he didn't have to? That would be downright stupid.

He loved his sister and would do pretty much anything in the world for the girl but trading places... at their current age...? They hadn't switched with each other since they were in elementary school when it was easier to get away with that kind of thing but now…. Now she was just being ridiculous. Looking alike could only get them so far, twins or not. Not only that, Naruto didn't know why Ino would possibly think that he would want to be stuck at the preppy and obnoxious Garden Private Academy while she got to go on some fabulous adventure with her friends. Naruto had a life too, he had friends, and he still had two weeks of summer vacation left -he didn't plan on wasting it.

Another thing, how the hell would they even get away with trading places?

Their parents weren't stupid.

Kakashi might go along with it because he enjoyed it when they expressed themselves and tried new things. In fact, their dad would probably encourage them to switch as a means to experience "walking a mile in the others shoes" or he'd push the idea of them "spreading their wings"… some bullshit along those lines. Iruka, on the other hand, would literally shit bricks if he even got wind of Ino's little scheme. There would be hell to pay even if they didn't go through with it because their papa would bitch on the basis that they'd dared to plan such a devious plot.

And most of the blame would be placed on him for the sole fact that he was usually the disobedient child.

All in all, Naruto didn't think it was worth it. "Yep, definitely no."

Ino pouted and grabbed onto Naruto's arm. "Please Naru! Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…. This would be the only real vacation I've had all summer and Sakura's parents are paying for everything. Everything Naru! You know how much I love free things and I'd bring you back a ton of free shit if you let me go. Please Naru, this is really important to me?" Bright turquoise eyes began to glisten with unshed tears as Ino pulled out her A-game. At this rate, she would need to pull out all of the stops to sway Naruto.

Naruto chanced one glimpse at his twin and regretted it. It was obvious that this trip really was as important to her as she was making it out to be. Still... "Fine. But you owe me big for this."

Ino squealed and tackled Naruto into a hug, his face lost amongst her bosom. A grin big enough for the both of them split across her face as she squeezed the life out of him.

She knew she'd win, she always won.

Ino was nine minutes younger than Naruto which deemed her the baby of the house as well as the only female- it would be a sin if she didn't get everything that she wanted. Despite Naruto's pigheadedness and the fact that he knew her better than anyone else, even he failed to turn her down most of the time.

"Alright, alright, get off me." Naruto sat up, thankful that he was being given a chance to breath. "What do I have to do?" He leaned against his headboard and sighed. It was going to be a very long night.

Silver eyes were focused on the pictures adorning the vast wall behind the television but there was one in particular that they couldn't stray from. It was a picture of two small blond toddlers playing in a pile of leaves with the biggest and brightest smiles plastered on their faces. That was Kakashi's favorite pictures (his favorite memory as well) because it was taken on the day that he and Iruka had finalized the adoption of Naruto and Ino Uzumaki.

He remembered meeting them for the first time and he knew it was a match made in heaven. The moment he'd stared into identical pairs of cobalt irises Kakashi just knew that he wanted to give them the world. He knew that he would love them and care for them as if he'd provided the seed that aided in their creation. And now… he wouldn't give them up for anything or anyone.

But times were changing and with that, his children were changing as well.

Ino was his princess, his baby girl, who was bright well beyond expectation with a heart made of gold. She had a knack for getting people to do her bidding and her obsessive tendencies were endearing. She went to a prestigious private academy in order to pursue some flashy doctor career after high school and she was excelling in following that dream.

Naruto was Kakashi's little boy- a young man that he was proud to call his son because he knew with absolute certainty that Naruto was going to change the world. The boy was just as intelligent as Ino but he had a spunk, an energy, that couldn't be contained or controlled by anyone or anything. Naruto's empathy and sympathetic disposition drove him in a way that motivated others and his charisma brought any gloomy moment to life. He attended a renowned arts academy, a place that suited his colorful spirit just fine.

Ino and Naruto were twins with differing personalities and ambitions that were made obvious by the different paths they'd chosen to follow over the years. They had different types of friends, different goals, and different plans for their future but that was to be expected because they were two different people. Like dawn and dusk… so different yet so similar all at once. Sometimes it was hard for Kakashi to remember just how different they were considering that, where his children were so alike stood out far more than their differences prevailed. Their most obvious similarity was their nearly identical appearance down to even their height (much to Naruto's dismay). They also had the same smile, laugh, pout, violent tendencies when prompted, and they complained in the same fashion.

To Kakashi's amusement, they tended to do all of those things in absolute harmony despite their protest on the matter.

That was fine with him.

Ino and Naruto were his spoiled brats, his babies, and he would die for them without a second thought.

Which was why he was having a hard time thinking about them growing up and moving on with their lives. They were such good kids and would soon grow to be phenomenal adults… time had moved by so fast and Kakashi didn't like it. He wasn't ready to send his children out into the wolves den once the school year ended, not yet. He wasn't ready to be left alone with their picture wall as a reminder of all their growth spurts, all of their happy moments, and everything in between.

If only he had some more time to value what little piece of their childhood that he had left he'd grasp it and never let go...

"Nostalgic much?" Iruka sat beside his husband and smiled as he loosened his apron. It wouldn't hurt to let dinner wait a few minutes.

Kakashi sighed as he glanced at his husband before glancing back at the photos on the wall. "The kids are going off to college at the end of this school year." Gray eyes lingered on the very first picture that they'd placed on the wall.

"Hmm… I'm the one who usually thinks about the kids growing up and running off to do God knows what." Iruka's hand touched Kakashi's chin as he gently turned the man's face, their eyes meeting. "What's really bothering you?" Iruka slid into his husband's lap and tenderly kissed the man's furrowed brow.

"Do you think they'll still need us once they leave for college?" It wasn't everyday that Kakashi had negative thoughts, in fact, it was a very rare occasion, but after the phone call he'd received that afternoon, he'd been thinking about a lot of things.

Iruka bristled, stunned at even hearing Kakashi voice such a ridiculous question. "Of course they will! Why wouldn't they?" He didn't understand what Kakashi's problem was and the only conclusion he could come to was that the man had watched Bambi again. That particular movie always made him sentimental and contemplative for reasons none of them understood.

Kakashi smiled and placed a kiss to Iruka's temple. "Ah, it's not important Ru." Ashen eyes glanced in the direction of the kitchen where gray smoke was wafting into the dining room. "But dinner is and you might want to go check on that."

Chestnut irises widened as Iruka stood and quickly fixed his apron. "Damn it, I hope I didn't burn anything." Iruka rushed into the kitchen leaving Kakashi to himself.

"ORANGE! LEMON! IT'S TIME FOR DINNER!" Kakashi stood, his eyes scanning the family photo wall one last time. "Let's see what this year will bring us."

Naruto studied the clothes Ino was placing on her bed, carefully committing to memory which outfit was for which day. He had switched places with Ino plenty of times when they were younger but his mind couldn't quite wrap around how they were going to pull it off now and for such a long period of time. Sure, they were the same height and nearly the same build (to his chagrin) but how were they going to explain his piercings and tattoos? How the hell was he supposed to change or shower in the locker room after gym? And where the fuck did she plan on getting him tits as big as hers?

Not only that, because she'd waited until the last minute to ask him to trade places with her, he didn't have the time to adjust to her mannerisms, to adapt to who she was when she was at school. Naruto didn't even know what kind of person she was when she was at her preppy ass academy with all the other pompous people that attended the school.

If worse came to worse, Ino was probably just like Sakura… Naruto shuddered at the thought.

Sakura Haruno was off her rocker and though he loved the girl like a sister, it would only make sense if someone as equally disturbed befriended her let alone claimed her as their best friend.

But if Ino wasn't like Sakura then she'd probably sponged onto the personalities of all the other stuck up assholes that attended GPA. He remembered Ino's first year there and how her personality had did a complete 180 in the short amount of time between summer and winter break. Sure, their family had just as much money as a great deal of the prestigious families that attended Garden Private but they lived a modest lifestyle. After a semester at GPA, Ino wanted to live like a queen.

She lived in a dorm for crying out loud.

Naruto sighed as he flopped down on Ino's bed and covered his eyes. There was no way in hell he'd be able to learn everything about his sister, her school, her behavior, and all things that concerned the girl's life when she was at school in just one day. It wasn't possible. They were going to get caught and, when they did, it wasn't going to be pretty. He would end up more screwed than she was… she so owed him for this.

Ino whacked Naruto with a hanger and glowered at him when he sat up. "Pay attention because this is the important part." She pointed to the five uniforms neatly folded at the foot of her bed. "There's one for everyday of the week but don't worry, they're labeled on the hanger and the inside tag."

"Do you have gym?" Naruto couldn't imagine hanging around the girl's locker room and watching as they undressed or showered… then again, if the circumstances were right, the boys locker room could have the same affect on him.

"Hmm…" Ino walked over to her desk and picked up her schedule for the semester. "I do!" She shoved the paper into Naruto's hands and sat down beside him. "These are all of my classes for the semester."

Naruto glanced over the sheet of paper and was engulfed with pride engulf due to his sister's choice in classes. Despite the possibility that she portrayed herself as an airhead at school, she at least was serious when it came to her academics. He was always surprised when reminded that Ino was sincerely intelligent and only feigned stupidity.

Naruto committed Ino's classes to memory. She had five and she had to attend each of them every day: Psychology III, Advanced Calculus, Advanced English, Physics, and Basketball. Lunch was after Calc, which would do him some good because, regardless of his intelligence, three years had passed since the last time he'd done a math problem. Naruto wasn't really worried, he'd always done better than Ino when it came to math. Psychology on the other hand… Shikamaru would have to help him with that particular subject.

"Why is basketball practice considered a class?" That was the only thing that hadn't really made much sense to him.

Ino gazed at the schedule one more time before she stood up to finish packing. "Club activities are mandatory and they take the place of an actual fifth period. My basketball uniform and practice clothes are in my suitcase so you should be fine. My dorm room hasn't changed since last year and you should know where it is but, if you don't, that's on the schedule too." Ino placed the last of her belongings in her school suitcase. "My dorm key is in the front pouch of this suitcase. Don't' lose it."

Naruto sighed. "So let me see if I've got all of this shit straight." His azure eyes turned to the ceiling before he stared at his sister once again. "You share a room with Tenten but I'll be fine because she knows that we're switching places for a while. She's also gonna help me put on all of that girly shit in the mornings so I'll have to get up early. I have four classes, I have basketball practice after those classes, and I'm a social butterfly." He couldn't believe how complicated the process of getting ready for school was for a girl.

"Good job." Ino nodded proudly and sat down. "But there's something crucial that you can't forget."

"What's that?" He was already forgetting crap as it was.

"You can't say or do anything stupid in front of Sasuke, Neji, or Gaara but you definitely have to say something to them if you see them. Be nice or something… flirt a little if you have the time. But don't fuck up or so help me…" Ino's eyes narrowed and Naruto held up his hands in surrender.

"Calm down, calm down… sheesh! Now why the hell would I have to talk to them? What are those bastards? The kings of the school?" He laughed to himself at the thought. He vaguely remembered the three and that same vague memory reminded him that they were ice bastards who only cared about themselves.

But then he remembered how all of the girls ridiculously fawned over them regardless of their personalities.

"In a sense, I guess you could call them the kings of the school. People practically fall over themselves to stake claim to one of them and I don't blame them. Just you wait until you see them… they look way better than they did when we were in junior high." Ino twirled around in her desk chair. "So, you can try to get me closer to them, at least, closer than Sakura is to them." Ino's turquoise eyes darkened as she thought of the girl and their ongoing rivalry to best each other when it came to befriending the three ice kings.

Naruto blanched. "But the two of you are going away together…" It was official, girls were crazy and illogical.

"Don't you think I know that? Call us frenemies if you want but you have to trust me on this one Naru. You're giving me an advantage and as long as you don't run off and fuck one of them-"

Naruto snorted. "As if that would ever happen…"

"We should be fine." Ino stood and placed the suitcase for her Miami trip beneath her bed.

"This is ridicu-" He and Ino jumped when her door banged open.

"And what might my two little devils be doing?" Kakashi smiled as he entered Ino's room and shut the door behind him.

Ino grinned. "I got Naruto to swap places with me, which means I can go to Miami, right?"

Naruto gawked at the two. He'd been conned… again.

"Sure thing Lemon, just make sure you call me every day." Kakashi smiled when Ino pulled him into a fierce hug. "Naru, I told Ru this morning that you'd planned to go on a road trip with Shikamaru and Kiba so we shouldn't have any problems tomorrow." Kakashi was an amazing man in Naruto's opinion because he was always, without fail several steps ahead of them.

One day… one day Naruto would come out the wiser.

"Whatever. Just remember what our terms were Ino." When his sister nodded Naruto crawled off of her bed. "I'm going to bed and I'll see you guys in the morning." Naruto hugged Ino and kissed her on the check before doing the same to his father. "You know, if papa ever finds out about this you'll be on the couch for a month?"

Kakashi raised an eyebrow and smirked. "No, he can only hold out for a week…"

"TMI!" Naruto and Ino covered their ears as Naruto rushed out of the room.

As Naruto reached his own room he couldn't stop the smile from forming on his face if he wanted to. For reasons he didn't want to begin to explore, he was looking forward to being his sister for a couple of days. Maybe that wasn't such a good thing.

TBC

A/N: Here's a little story I decided to write after watching She's The Man for the umpteenth time. And here you have it, the first chapter.

If you dug it, drop me a line otherwise, thanks for reading.