Glimpses Into the Heavens
Disclaimer: If they were mine, happy dances galore, but they belong to Joss
Rating: R
Summary: Spike lingers in regret
Distribution: Sure, only tell me
Notes: I stole one line from either the book or the movie, Interview With a Vampire; I just always loved that line.
***
Spike let the cool drops of the summer rainstorm pound gently onto his body. His head tilted up, looking into the sky, looking for the light glimpses of the heavens. The heavens he had heard about as a child, when he was still mortal. The very heavens he mocked nightly, as he felt the precious pounding of a luckless pulse, the smooth calmness erupting into complete chaos as he felt that pulse weaken and deaden, the life force transferring into his very own. Laughing, he continued his stare, challenging the God of his youth, laughing because he knew the existence was imaginary, the way his victims would hold their hands in prayer before their bloody deaths, it was all…futile.
***
The beads of rain transformed into heavy bolts, awakening the vampire from his own mind, allowing him to force his face away from the sky and to wipe the watery drops off his brow. Needlessly breathing hard, the blonde vampire turned slowly around looking into the lighted doors of the little cottage. Flowers decorated the walkway as he slowly trudged upwards towards the small building. His feet roughly battering down the delicate flowers, leaving bruised and broken stems and petals in his wake. He kicked over a small pot, that held a sad looking fern, laughing a bit at the shattering sound that erupted as it crashed to the stony porch that surrounded the little home. He stood in front of the wooden door that was scratched and scarred from years of sunny service to its owners. His hand went for the small decorative doorknob, but not before he looked down at the sun faded doormat with the word 'welcome' scrawled on it. Shaking his head slowly, his lips in a cruel twist, he let out a soothing chuckle, adoring the very thing that had given him admittance into this very home. Opening the door slowly, grimacing a bit as the flood of the light and fire that still burned cheerfully greeted him. Slowly, Spike turned and closed the old door behind him, removing his wet duster from his cold and soaked body. He turned and surveyed the bright room, cleansed of its broken glass and furniture. The bodies of its former inhabitants lay casually in the corner, stiffening and paling with the finality of their deaths. Glancing casually at the mournful corpses, the vampire turned slowly towards the body that kneeled near a kitten in the corner.
"I thought you were going to get rid of the bodies." He barked coldly, walking across the room, holding his hands out to the fire, trying to warm his always-chilled body.
The girl turned away from the small animal, a grin formed on her small lips as she looked over towards the master of their new home. From the corner of his tired eyes he saw her rise slowly, moving in cat-like graces towards him, her feet clicking lightly on the floor, even though she wore no shoes. She reached him and her hand went out to touch the back of his still wet neck, she flicked away drops of water that still fell loosely from his cropped blonde hair. He flinched as her arms draped about his neck, and he felt more than heard the hum of her small voice against his neck.
"But they look pretty there…together."
Turning around he gathered the girls wrists tightly in his hands, still shocked by how her smile would grow at the touch of pain. Gently letting up the pressure on her wrists, he lowered his lips to the cool skin of her forehead.
"Next time do as I say." He warned, letting her wrists go and turning back towards the fire.
His eyes wondered around the small room, taking in the surroundings, a small bible rested on a simple table near a much used checkered couch. Pictures of family, friends, someone scattered and cluttered the walls. But his eyes went back to the bible, ignoring the smiling faces peering out from the photographs. He questioned how it remained so unscathed when everything else had turned into undeniable chaos earlier. Shrugging his shoulders, he walked towards the book, picking it up, flipping through a few pages, and then turning back towards the flames, tossing the book in along with what remained of his childhood, human fancies.
He turned back to the girl who had graced the small kitten with her attentions again and motioned for her to look at him, she pulled the string she had been using to captivate the animals attention, up into her hand, hiding it from the kittens eyes. Spike watched as the small bundle of fur curiously clawed at the girls hand. She gently swatted away the animal, and looked at him, her eyes full of things that surprised him nightly. For instance, her ability to quickly, swiftly end the life of a human, or to drag out the death in the cruelest way and at the same time to gently stroke a kittens fur.
"Why do you like to keep them?" He asked gesturing towards the cold bodies.
"I-I just do." She said looking shamefully to the ground.
He walked towards her, his boots hitting the wooden floor, vibrating off the cared for ground.
He put his hand out towards her, and she reached eagerly for his arm, grabbing it, lightly pulling herself off the ground. The kitten mewed at her sudden departure. But the furry animal was forgotten as his eyes met hers. The fiercest and warmest colors of green met his piercing and numb blue eyes. His hand swept up her hair, gently tugging at the fiery strands, reminiscing in the color.
***
It had been ten years. Ten years since he drank from the Slayer, ten years since he had snapped the neck of the Watcher. Ten fast years since he had stabbed the boy and his former demon hotly and quickly, with the blade of their own sword as they scrambled to protect her. Ten years since he first drank her sweet blood, it poured through his body like some kind of a magical potion. It had been ten years since he had last looked into the eyes of the girl he had always affectionately called Red.
She awoke after his fateful kiss anew, never recalling the person who once possessed her body. Not remembering her newly dead friends. Never knowing for sure she had ever been anything but what she was now.
***
The blonde vampire's body heaved in a mournful sigh as he pulled the small frame of his lover closer to his body, his soaked clothing pressing against her dry ones, her fingers happily dancing around his face. He looked again into those deep green eyes, as he had nightly for these years in search of recognition, in search of his Red, only once again disappointed by the alarming change he always saw, for when he closed his own eyes, hers were the same. She giggled when she saw him close his eyes, whispering kindly,
"Are you looking for her again?"
He didn't answer, instead he brought her hand to his lips and let a kiss linger.
Soothingly and never with out a drop of hesitation she said, "I was mortal to you once."
Shaking his head yes, the vampire, released the never aging hand and walked once more towards the door of the weathered and once loved cottage, pausing briefly before he left to say, "Get rid of them before I come back."
***
The rain still landed in harsh drops and once again Spike stopped and let it pelt his flesh, let it chill him even more. And he looked up to the dark sky once more, searching yet again for a glimpse of the heavens. Slowly shaking his head as he knew the only two things he had ever wanted in his unlife would never be his. Drusilla, who had danced slowly into the sunlight and Red, who died the day he killed her. Drusilla he would never lay his steely eyes on again, her ashes had scattered across a grassy hill. And Red, he had to look at her body nightly, and reconcile himself with the creature that had taken her place.
The End