Once Snape graduated from Hogwarts, he met up with his pal Lord Voldemort.
The two shared the same dark (darker than black) sense of humour and out
of all of the Death Eaters, Snape truly understood Voldie's plans to
dominate the world. While the other Death Eaters were around, the pair
maintained a strictly professional front, with a Crucio here and there, and
unrelenting orders the rest of the time.
But after hours, and after they'd downed their way through several bottles
of Firewhisky, they were best buddies and Voldemort was at the height of
his powers (believe me, don't say that he's at the height of his powers
when he was surrounded by Death Eaters, that isn't quite the truth. Voldie
was unstoppable once he made a beeline to the liquor cabinet). Weekly after-
hour drinks for Snape and Voldie evolved into daily traditions. The pair
became even closer friends but it was one Friday night after a particularly
hard day (Voldie was forced to Avada Kedavra a couple of his D.E.'s for
discovering his secret stash of Playwiz magazines and reading them, though
they mainly took to just looking at the pictures) when a joke was thrown
around about going to Vegas. The idea played in Voldie's mind for quite
awhile before he outburst "Let's do it!!"
Snape looked rather surprised. He had been rambling on about the time he
was playing Croquet and he transfigured the balls to look like James Potter
and his gang's heads.
"Wh-What?" he stuttered, finding a difficulty in retaining speech because
so much alcohol overcame him.
"Let's go to Vegas!!" Voldie said enthusiastically (his words were also
pretty slurred too). "I need to get away from here for a bit of time." He
waved his hand around his 5 storey Unplottable mansion.
Snape gave a big grin (though as hard as he tried, it still resembled a
grimace) and stood up. "Great idea. We can Apparate there. How 'bout we go
there now!!" He exclaimed.
Voldie stood up and disappeared into thin air. Snape was two seconds
behind him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
They re-appeared on a stage around 10 or so Showgirls who all did a double take when they saw these two ugly men pop up out of nowhere. The audience all clapped and cheered, assuming it was all part of the show. The Showgirls took about ten seconds to recover and continued with their show, probably thinking that those drugs they took were giving them hallucinations. They started to dance around these two men and one large woman (with giant bosoms to match) formed a rather rude but suggestive pose in front of Snape. Snape blushed (though through that greasy mop of hair that covered his face and his pale skin, you couldn't tell). He signalled to Voldie and they both disapparated off the stage. They found themselves in the street and looked at each other with great grins. Voldie's face was covered with lipstick marks and he had some purple lacy underwear poking out the top of his robes, as if someone had pushed them in there. "What should we do?" Snape asked him. Voldie looked around and the bright incandescent lights from all the casinos and clubs made his head spin. He could have sworn that a monkey passed by wearing dungarees and rollerskates. "Lets do pick up some ladies." He said. At this point, alcohol had his mind so consumed that he didn't care about hitting it off with muggle women, which he usually hated at any other time. The pair walked into the nearest casino and approached some Showgirls who in Snape and Voldie's opinions, looked 'pretty darn sexy'. They showed off by dragging the girls to the nearest blackjack table and trying to put a bet down, but the dealer had never heard of 'galleons, sickles and knuts' before. The Showgirls were giggling like mad (they had also had too much to drink) so Snape and Voldie decided to go to the nearest hotel and try to get a room for the night with these two Showgirls. The man at the lobby told them that they could pay their fee in the morning and gave them the 'honeymoon' suite. The lads and the ladies travelled up to the room. After awhile, one of the Showgirls pulled out some purple liquid in a little plastic container and told them that if they gave her some gold, she'd give it to them and it would 'make your world 100 times more fun'. Snape and Voldie decided to buy it from her and gave her some galleons. The Showgirl, being so uneducated, didn't notice that it was from a totally different currency. The lads took the small purple liquid and the room started to shake. Snape looked at the Showgirl in front of her and noticed for the first time just how beautiful she was. Voldie looked at the other Showgirl and she gave him a great smile, and he felt something he had never felt before and would probably never have felt again. It was love.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sparks certainly flew that night but I will leave the events of that night to your imagination. Snape awoke the next morning with a colossal headache, about as bad as the Cruciatus curse. The world most ugliest muggle was asleep next to him, a man with heavy gold and pink makeup, a glitzy white dress and fake boobs. Voldie also woke up the next morning with even more lipstick marks on his face and he was missing a shoe. His black robes were torn and revealed a disturbing amount of grey chest hair. Snape noticed and started to snigger. Voldie fixed his robes with a flick of his wand and hexed Snape for a few minutes. The two stood up carefully to try not wake the other two men and Voldie and Snape apparated back to Voldie's mansion. The place smelled like cod liver oil, a thing Snape noticed the first time. His nose was extra sensitive to everything now that he was suffering from a hangover. The two sat down on the couch and looked at each other uncomfortably. Their friendship seemed to have been damaged. Voldie took a deep breath and gave Snape a small smile. "How about we promise never to tell anyone about last night," he said quietly. Snape gave a relieved sigh and nodded as slow as he could without giving him a shoddier headache. "If you leave the me and the Death Eaters, I will truly understand. In fact," he looked Snape in his bloodshot eyes, "I this is to weird. I cannot go on dictating you after what happened last night. I am banishing you from being my follower. Will you leave me forever?" he asked desperately. Snape completely agreed with that suggestion. "You will pay of coarse. One day I'll have to torture you for leaving me but trust me, that won't be until another few decades. Pretend to be a spy for the good side, I don't want you killed or thrown in Askaban. Feed them false information, say you were under the Imperius Curse, just don't even come back to me again, okay? By looking at you, I will always remember last night. Go now. I can't stand the sight of you." Voldie ordered and turned his back on him. Snape heaved a big sigh and stood up to leave. He apparated away and made his way onto the good side. Albus Dumbledore, to whom he trusted enough to confide in and told Dumbledore the full truth, soon accepted him in and hired him as Potions master, despite his wish to become Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher. Dumbledore promised to never tell anyone, even the other members of staff and even though many people still believed that he was following the Dark Side, Dumbledore trusted him and kept him as a member of staff at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
THE END
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
They re-appeared on a stage around 10 or so Showgirls who all did a double take when they saw these two ugly men pop up out of nowhere. The audience all clapped and cheered, assuming it was all part of the show. The Showgirls took about ten seconds to recover and continued with their show, probably thinking that those drugs they took were giving them hallucinations. They started to dance around these two men and one large woman (with giant bosoms to match) formed a rather rude but suggestive pose in front of Snape. Snape blushed (though through that greasy mop of hair that covered his face and his pale skin, you couldn't tell). He signalled to Voldie and they both disapparated off the stage. They found themselves in the street and looked at each other with great grins. Voldie's face was covered with lipstick marks and he had some purple lacy underwear poking out the top of his robes, as if someone had pushed them in there. "What should we do?" Snape asked him. Voldie looked around and the bright incandescent lights from all the casinos and clubs made his head spin. He could have sworn that a monkey passed by wearing dungarees and rollerskates. "Lets do pick up some ladies." He said. At this point, alcohol had his mind so consumed that he didn't care about hitting it off with muggle women, which he usually hated at any other time. The pair walked into the nearest casino and approached some Showgirls who in Snape and Voldie's opinions, looked 'pretty darn sexy'. They showed off by dragging the girls to the nearest blackjack table and trying to put a bet down, but the dealer had never heard of 'galleons, sickles and knuts' before. The Showgirls were giggling like mad (they had also had too much to drink) so Snape and Voldie decided to go to the nearest hotel and try to get a room for the night with these two Showgirls. The man at the lobby told them that they could pay their fee in the morning and gave them the 'honeymoon' suite. The lads and the ladies travelled up to the room. After awhile, one of the Showgirls pulled out some purple liquid in a little plastic container and told them that if they gave her some gold, she'd give it to them and it would 'make your world 100 times more fun'. Snape and Voldie decided to buy it from her and gave her some galleons. The Showgirl, being so uneducated, didn't notice that it was from a totally different currency. The lads took the small purple liquid and the room started to shake. Snape looked at the Showgirl in front of her and noticed for the first time just how beautiful she was. Voldie looked at the other Showgirl and she gave him a great smile, and he felt something he had never felt before and would probably never have felt again. It was love.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sparks certainly flew that night but I will leave the events of that night to your imagination. Snape awoke the next morning with a colossal headache, about as bad as the Cruciatus curse. The world most ugliest muggle was asleep next to him, a man with heavy gold and pink makeup, a glitzy white dress and fake boobs. Voldie also woke up the next morning with even more lipstick marks on his face and he was missing a shoe. His black robes were torn and revealed a disturbing amount of grey chest hair. Snape noticed and started to snigger. Voldie fixed his robes with a flick of his wand and hexed Snape for a few minutes. The two stood up carefully to try not wake the other two men and Voldie and Snape apparated back to Voldie's mansion. The place smelled like cod liver oil, a thing Snape noticed the first time. His nose was extra sensitive to everything now that he was suffering from a hangover. The two sat down on the couch and looked at each other uncomfortably. Their friendship seemed to have been damaged. Voldie took a deep breath and gave Snape a small smile. "How about we promise never to tell anyone about last night," he said quietly. Snape gave a relieved sigh and nodded as slow as he could without giving him a shoddier headache. "If you leave the me and the Death Eaters, I will truly understand. In fact," he looked Snape in his bloodshot eyes, "I this is to weird. I cannot go on dictating you after what happened last night. I am banishing you from being my follower. Will you leave me forever?" he asked desperately. Snape completely agreed with that suggestion. "You will pay of coarse. One day I'll have to torture you for leaving me but trust me, that won't be until another few decades. Pretend to be a spy for the good side, I don't want you killed or thrown in Askaban. Feed them false information, say you were under the Imperius Curse, just don't even come back to me again, okay? By looking at you, I will always remember last night. Go now. I can't stand the sight of you." Voldie ordered and turned his back on him. Snape heaved a big sigh and stood up to leave. He apparated away and made his way onto the good side. Albus Dumbledore, to whom he trusted enough to confide in and told Dumbledore the full truth, soon accepted him in and hired him as Potions master, despite his wish to become Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher. Dumbledore promised to never tell anyone, even the other members of staff and even though many people still believed that he was following the Dark Side, Dumbledore trusted him and kept him as a member of staff at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
THE END