The Parable of Cain and Abel
Spoilers: Major, major spoilers for Resurrection Ship, Part 1 and Pegasus
Summary: How could anyone go so wrong?
Rating: K+
Author's note: Battlestar Galactica isn't mine, and Cain and Abel aren't mine. The story and the ideas contained within is mine.
How could anyone go so wrong?
That is the thought running through William Adama's head as he contemplates doing something he never thought he would ever think about, much less do.
Kill in cold blood.
Kill a woman in cold blood.
Kill a superior in cold blood.
Yet how, in good conscience, can he not?
How could anyone go so wrong?
Just thinking about what she's done chills his blood, making it easier to say what he's contemplating is right.
Killed her CO (in cold blood).
Stripped civilian ships and left them to die (in cold blood).
Ordered people to leave their families and when they wouldn't, killed those families (in cold blood).
What she ordered done to Sharon makes him ill.
How could anyone go so wrong?
She hadn't always been like that, or so he recalls. It seems a very long time ago, and it was all only hearsay. He knows, though, that the insanity she displays now wouldn't have been tolerated in someone promoted to Admiral. Maybe it had always been just below the surface, hiding, waiting. Maybe the destruction of humanity drove her over the edge. Maybe she was going over and the billions of deaths pushed her the rest of the way.
How could anyone go so wrong?
He wouldn't tell anyone, but in his most secret of thoughts, she scares him. Terrifies him. Not only because of what she's done, but because of what she represents. He could have been the same as her. They have stared at the Abyss, and the Abyss stared back at them. He had Lee and Kara and Laura and even Saul to pull him back, but had he not had them…
He could have met the monster within himself.
How could anyone go so wrong?
He is suddenly reminded of Cain and Abel, a story he heard long ago, almost a dream from when the worlds were whole. Cain and Abel offered their sacrifices up to the Gods and the Gods chose Abel's. In a jealous rage, Cain killed Abel and was doomed by the Gods to wander, never to be allowed back to his homeland. Both he and the Admiral are doomed to wander, but he wonders who is Cain and who is Abel. He is contemplating killing her, though out of necessity rather than jealousy, but he wouldn't be surprised if she planned his death as he contemplated hers. Yet, after killing Abel, Cain was given the protection of the Gods and was eventually allowed to settle in another land.
He is not sure who is Cain and who is Abel, but he would prefer to be neither.
But he knows he has to choose, and he does not know how. If he is Abel, he dies and leaves the Galactica and the civilian Fleet in the hands of a monster. If he is Cain, he kills in cold blood and has it forever weighing on his conscience, never to be forgiving, the mark of the Gods offering protection but also an eternal reminder of his sin. He will once again stare into the Abyss and it will stare back at him. Perhaps this time, no one will be able to pull him back.
He wonders how anyone could go so wrong, but he is not sure he wants to know the answer.
I thought Resurrection Ship, Part 1 was absolutely amazing, and I was inspired to write a fanfic about it. This is not that fanfic. This was supposed to be that fanfic, but it dragged me in a different direction. So I hope you enjoy it anyway!