Disclaimer: Bren Gail does not own Criminal Minds, Supernatural, or any other television show or graphic novel. Also, she does not own the lyrics used from Have You Ever by S Club 7.

Inspired by, 4-13-2012, Bonesbird Fanfiction Drabble Challenge,

Have you ever loved and lost somebody
Wish there was a chance to say I'm sorry
Can't you see that's the way I feel
About you and me baby?

- Have You Ever by S Club 7

Chapter One

She had hated her birthday since she was eighteen years old.

The weekend after her eighteenth birthday, an irresponsible drunk driver in a preventable hellacious car wreck killed her parents who had been on their way to her dorm to celebrate her birthday. Ever since then, each year when her birthday neared, she would plaster a bubbly fake smile, change gears from tenacious liveliness to auto pilot, and pretend that all was well in the Garcia Universe. She would live in auto pilot mode weeks after the day that was supposed to be a celebration of life, yet ironically for her was a reminder of death. Over the years and with each year that passed, her fake smile and robotic motions had transformed, continuously yet slowly, into something more genuine, but not quite completely.

She had long since grieved her parents' death, yet the pain was still there, though subtle and ready to strike whenever her guard was down. When that pain would strike, she found solace in her friends, electronic babies, and career, yet when those coping mechanisms did not work, and regrettably those failed more often than not; she would escape into her graphic novels.

She had an on-again-off-again love affair with her graphic novels and a select few television shows. When she had the time she devoured them, yet most of her time was spent assisting the modern day version of The Avengers. Her current favorite Graphic Novel series would be, the underrated and unjustly defamed Supernatural. She had related to Dean and Sam Winchester the moment she had read the first few pages of that first Graphic Novel. Her heart broke for the poor boys that had lost their mother so young, who years later became estranged only to reunite after their father had went missing, yet then the tragic death of the love of Sam's life had cemented their reunion.

She realized that it was ironic that she had latched onto, and became so thoroughly addicted to such a series that had death closely weaved throughout all of the storyline, yet that was perhaps why she had chosen it as her favorite. The death was fictional, but as the fictional characters dealt with the death and grief within the storylines, she grieved with them, and subconsciously she was grieving her own tangible loss.

She smiled contently while mischief sparkled within her eyes as she remembered that Carver Edlund was sponsoring a new, very rare, fan convention. She just had to attend and there was nothing that was going to stop her from doing so. She sighed happily as she logged unto the website to reserve a ticket to the convention. The arrow of the wireless computer mouse lingered on the number of ticket many tickets would she need? She did not want to go alone, but no one she knew shared her love of Supernatural.

She considered reserving two tickets and dragging one of the team to the convention, but reconsidered that when she saw how much the convention cost. She had no issue with paying that much money, because she'd eliminate her wardrobe budget for several months, yet all that money spent would be for naught, because whichever one of the team that she persuaded to go with her, would not have as much fun as she. Also, the thought of the convention becoming sold out, and a true die hard fan not being able to attend, because she had brought a person that was not even a casual fan to the rare, almost unheard of, convention, she made the decision to only reserve one ticket.

She had to persuade Edlund into meeting with her. She longed to meet Carver Edlund so she could thank him for creating such a wonderful universe for her to escape to, and possibly ask the age old questions that writers are requested to answer; how did you come up with the idea, plot, characters? When do you write? Why did you write? Which character/story are your favorites? Who, if anyone, inspired you and/or the characters? Are any parts reflective of your personal experiences? And so many other questions, she yearned to ask.

If she must, she would use her credentials, to persuade the mastermind behind her beloved series, Carver Edlund, into agreeing to meet with her.

Ironically those same credentials, she planned to use to get what she wanted, would be the reason why she might not be able to attend.

Sneak peek for the next chapter: "You owe me, Cara, and rest assured I will collect."